The hotel was not the best in town. White paint was flaking away from the
walls revealing stripy blue and green wallpaper underneath. The
floorboards were well polished, and extremely slippery. A fairly young
woman with green hair and a nose ring was noisily chewing gum and reading a
gossip magazine. She was sat behind a desk, with the keys and names of the
residents behind it also. Jack supposed it might be a good idea to ask her
where Shelby/Apophis was. Her reaction was unsurprising.
"I can't tell yer 'bout none f that lot wots staying 'ere. I'll gets fired like?"
Jack smiled uneasily and showed her his ID. "I'm Colonel John J. O'Neill, United States Air Force, and I really need to see that book of yours there." He motioned to the guest book. He knew Apophis would not have been too clever at thinking up an inconspicuous name and so would be easy to trace.
"Wots the Marines want wif one of these bums?"
Jack sighed. This was proving difficult. "I'm not a marine. He's wanted for murder. Multiple murders in fact. And attempted murder. And grievous bodily harm. Also actual bodily harm." Jack thought carefully about what he said next. "And sabotage in a military base, resulting in the injury of a General." A cracked coccyx was painful after all.
"Aint all this a police job?"
"Well, it would be but for the sabotage part. And he tried to kill me too and that really REALLY pisses me off." Jack hissed at the woman.
She looked at him, apparently quite worried now. "He really did? An.An he's here like?"
"Yes."
She slid the book across the desk to Jack. Her gossip magazine fell to the floor, forgotten as she watched the Colonel.
"Damn." Thought Jack. He had two choices here. Either could be his man. 'Apophis Smith' or "Klorel Shelby." Jack looked into the woman's curious watching eyes. "You remember what these guys look like?" He pointed to the names.
"Yup. You want me to describe them like?"
Jack nodded.
"Well, now that Apophis fella. He were like.well you know." She whispered "Hot."
Jack gave the lady a dirty look. "That's NOT helpful madam." He replied being as civil as possible.
"K. Well.Chlorine or wotever his name were, well.he had muscles you know. but you know he just didn't have the looks like?"
"Mmm." Jack was seriously considering taking both names and shooting both guys dead. It wasn't like the sonofabitch had cared about taking lives so why should he? Then his conscience jumped in again, sounding suspiciously like Daniel. "But we care and that's what makes us better than them."
"And Chlorine like had this wicked tattoo tho' on his hand like. An eagle I think it were. Was well wicked."
"Yes! He did?"
"Yeah like. Nice hair do an' all. Shame about the colour tho'. Ginger see. I prefer blondes. At least it weren't brown. Can't stand brunettes like?"
Klorel Shelby was definitely Apophis. Jack thanked the lady and then headed up to the room in which Apophis would probably die, if Jack had anything t do with it.
But then again there was anther issue running around in Jack's head. Who in their right mind would call their child "Apophis Smith?" It just didn't sound right. Apophis and Smith were just two names that should go together. Apophis was OK. If you didn't mind being named after the God of Snakes, and an evil warlord type Goa'uld, just not with the surname Smith.
Finally he reached the door and as he listened to the sounds f the apartment, he heard the helicopter outside, and then a voice announcing the arrival f the NID, demanding that the perpetrator came out without a fight. Jack braced himself for some serious problems.
*Soz for the delay chaps and chappesses. Been having a few probs.
For whoever it was who mentioned I should sort out my medical facts OK. I was wrong, but you could have phrased it nicer. I have confidence problems as it is. Writing fan fiction is part of my therapy. I have PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder), and this is how I've been building up my confidence and venting my frustrations and anger. Your bitchiness in pointing out my mistake knocked my confidence back down to how it was three months ago, when I rarely ventured outside the house unless it was absolutely necessary. I don't mind you saying I got it wrong- I admit, I did, but you could have been nicer. It's taken me a while to decide to carry on writing- and in fact I only am because Sue (my therapist) thought it'd be good to carry on regardless. We are all only human after all, I made a mistake, but so do a lot of authors- I don't go around making snarky comments to everyone who makes a mistake abut PTSD though. (When I do read ones with that in- it is a very tender subject still.) So. To put a long story short. I am touchy and by all means, please point out my mistakes. I welcome good and bad reviews, and comments to make my writing better- but be nice about it when I make a mistake. Not everyone can handle little comments like that, but it crushed me and now my meds have been upped again. I hope you're proud of yourself.
To everyone else- Thanks for the reviews. I'll be wrapping this up soon and will try to be more prompt with the next chapter!!!
"I can't tell yer 'bout none f that lot wots staying 'ere. I'll gets fired like?"
Jack smiled uneasily and showed her his ID. "I'm Colonel John J. O'Neill, United States Air Force, and I really need to see that book of yours there." He motioned to the guest book. He knew Apophis would not have been too clever at thinking up an inconspicuous name and so would be easy to trace.
"Wots the Marines want wif one of these bums?"
Jack sighed. This was proving difficult. "I'm not a marine. He's wanted for murder. Multiple murders in fact. And attempted murder. And grievous bodily harm. Also actual bodily harm." Jack thought carefully about what he said next. "And sabotage in a military base, resulting in the injury of a General." A cracked coccyx was painful after all.
"Aint all this a police job?"
"Well, it would be but for the sabotage part. And he tried to kill me too and that really REALLY pisses me off." Jack hissed at the woman.
She looked at him, apparently quite worried now. "He really did? An.An he's here like?"
"Yes."
She slid the book across the desk to Jack. Her gossip magazine fell to the floor, forgotten as she watched the Colonel.
"Damn." Thought Jack. He had two choices here. Either could be his man. 'Apophis Smith' or "Klorel Shelby." Jack looked into the woman's curious watching eyes. "You remember what these guys look like?" He pointed to the names.
"Yup. You want me to describe them like?"
Jack nodded.
"Well, now that Apophis fella. He were like.well you know." She whispered "Hot."
Jack gave the lady a dirty look. "That's NOT helpful madam." He replied being as civil as possible.
"K. Well.Chlorine or wotever his name were, well.he had muscles you know. but you know he just didn't have the looks like?"
"Mmm." Jack was seriously considering taking both names and shooting both guys dead. It wasn't like the sonofabitch had cared about taking lives so why should he? Then his conscience jumped in again, sounding suspiciously like Daniel. "But we care and that's what makes us better than them."
"And Chlorine like had this wicked tattoo tho' on his hand like. An eagle I think it were. Was well wicked."
"Yes! He did?"
"Yeah like. Nice hair do an' all. Shame about the colour tho'. Ginger see. I prefer blondes. At least it weren't brown. Can't stand brunettes like?"
Klorel Shelby was definitely Apophis. Jack thanked the lady and then headed up to the room in which Apophis would probably die, if Jack had anything t do with it.
But then again there was anther issue running around in Jack's head. Who in their right mind would call their child "Apophis Smith?" It just didn't sound right. Apophis and Smith were just two names that should go together. Apophis was OK. If you didn't mind being named after the God of Snakes, and an evil warlord type Goa'uld, just not with the surname Smith.
Finally he reached the door and as he listened to the sounds f the apartment, he heard the helicopter outside, and then a voice announcing the arrival f the NID, demanding that the perpetrator came out without a fight. Jack braced himself for some serious problems.
*Soz for the delay chaps and chappesses. Been having a few probs.
For whoever it was who mentioned I should sort out my medical facts OK. I was wrong, but you could have phrased it nicer. I have confidence problems as it is. Writing fan fiction is part of my therapy. I have PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder), and this is how I've been building up my confidence and venting my frustrations and anger. Your bitchiness in pointing out my mistake knocked my confidence back down to how it was three months ago, when I rarely ventured outside the house unless it was absolutely necessary. I don't mind you saying I got it wrong- I admit, I did, but you could have been nicer. It's taken me a while to decide to carry on writing- and in fact I only am because Sue (my therapist) thought it'd be good to carry on regardless. We are all only human after all, I made a mistake, but so do a lot of authors- I don't go around making snarky comments to everyone who makes a mistake abut PTSD though. (When I do read ones with that in- it is a very tender subject still.) So. To put a long story short. I am touchy and by all means, please point out my mistakes. I welcome good and bad reviews, and comments to make my writing better- but be nice about it when I make a mistake. Not everyone can handle little comments like that, but it crushed me and now my meds have been upped again. I hope you're proud of yourself.
To everyone else- Thanks for the reviews. I'll be wrapping this up soon and will try to be more prompt with the next chapter!!!