So you can just imagine the foul mood that Gandalf was in by the time they all got to the Gates of Moria. And his mood certainly wasn't improved by the fact that the rest of the Fellowship was quite cheery and Merry and Pippin decided to skip stones in the pond by Moria (Gandalf already had a pounding headache and the sounds of several splashing stones didn't help). Then of course was the problem of opening the Gates of Moria. You'd think that a wise old wizard such as Gandalf would be able to figure out the implications of the words "Speak friend and enter." But no!

The sight of Gandalf speaking several imposing sentences in Elvish while getting absolutely no response was quite amusing.

And so Pippin was grinning when he spoke up: "Nothing's happening."

"Be quiet you fool of a Took!" Gandalf snapped. He continued to try some more Elvish words with no success.

Merry giggled. "Still nothing's happening!"

"Oh hush you silly little schoolgirl," Gandalf muttered, trying to be as insulting as possible. He then started to shove and push at the door.

Sam snorted. "Like that's going to work."

"Confounded old Samwise Gamgee! You keep quiet!" Gandalf boomed. Gandalf then proceeded to bang his staff against the door.

Gimli snickered. "If you're gonna go and do that, why not try my axe?"

Gandalf would have responded, but his face was turning quite red from anger. He then started muttering hideous Elvish curses at the door.

Legolas covered his ears with a moan (his elf ears were quite sensitive and ironically all the shampooing and conditioning had resulted in his ears being even more sensitive), Aragorn replied with an indignant "That was not so courteous," to Gandalf and Boromir rolled his eyes while saying, "What a bunch of doorknobs."

By this time Gandalf was getting angry enough to the point were his beard was starting to singe from the steam coming out of his nose. But what the Fellowship did next really set him off.

As one, Frodo, Sam, Merry, Pippin, Gimli, Legolas, Aragorn and Boromir all chorused, "It's not ooooooooopeniiiiiiiiing."

"AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!"

Gandalf then threw his staff down and plopped down on a large sitting rock to have himself a pout.

It was than that Frodo whispered in Legolas' ear, "What's the Elvish word for friend?"

Legolas whispered back, "Mellon."

Frodo than shrugged, walked close up to the gates and said quite loudly: "Mellon."

In a semi-dramatic fashion, the Gates of Moria opened.

Gandalf stood up and stomped over to Frodo in a rage.

"Why didn't you say anything before?"

Frodo grinned. "This was more fun."

I don't think Frodo realized that he was about two seconds away from being fried by a bolt of lightning, but he was saved by an unlikely source.

The watcher in the pond suddenly came up sputtering, with a bunch of small stones in its tentacles.

"Alright who's been throwing stones into the water!"

Gandalf glared over at Merry and Pippin before stepping forward with his staff to deal with the watcher. If I had been the watcher...I would have run from just the look on Gandalf's face.

Anyway, Gandalf's complete snap of temper and temporary lack of sanity resulted in:

1. Him throwing...no flinging the members of the Fellowship into the mines one by one.

2. Striking a bolt of lightning on the watcher and turning him...it into calamari. Actually quite tasty!

And 3. Striking down the door in the Gates of Moria.

Than not realizing he had just forced the Fellowship into going through the mines (or not caring in the least) Gandalf started stomping through the mines...the rest of the Fellowship following at a safe distance.