Faramir regarded the puddle and heaved a sigh, his shoulders slumping in defeat, "Get the mop."
"The mop?" Galadriel asked.
"Yeah. I have to clean this up." Faramir said, motioning toward the floor.
Galadriel blinked, "Faramir, the floor can wait. You've started labor..."
"No!" Faramir gasped, horrified, "I can't leave this mess!"
"Come, we'll clean it up later." Galadriel said, trying to pull Faramir out of the room toward the nearest bed so he could lay down.
Faramir gave her a look that clearly said, "You're insane woman!' and planted his boots in place, "It...can...not...wait!!!! I'm not going anywhere until this mess is cleaned up!"
"Faramir..." Galadriel started.
"No!" Faramir interrupted, arms crossed.
"You're in..."
"No!"
"Can't you just..."
"No!"
"Stupid man!" Galadriel hissed.
"Get...the...mop."
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
A half hour later Boromir waddled into a situation where his brother was still arguing with Galadriel and asked, "What's going on?"
Galadriel sighed in relief, "Boromir, maybe you can talk some sense into your brother."
"Boromir! Get off the floor! I just cleaned!"
Boromir jumped at his brother's angry voice (quite a sight from someone who's 9 months pregnant), which unfortunately caused him to crash into a small table and go down with it.
"Boromir!" Faramir yelled, "I happened to like that table!"
Galadriel pressed two fingers to her temples before turning to the first two elves she saw, "Please get Faramir settled into a bed."
"But..." Faramir started.
"FARAMIR DON'T ARGE WITH ME!!!"
Faramir stared at Galadriel in shock but a contraction kept him from responding to Galadriel. He was then led away by the two elves taking deep, even breaths (Faramir, not the elves).
Sighing to herself Galadriel turned her attention to Boromir, who was still sitting on the ground among the pieces of the broken table, clutching his stomach and grimacing in pain.
"Boromir..." she started, walking toward him.
"It hurts." Boromir moaned.
'Great. Now I have two of them to deal with,' Galadriel thought as she walked up to Boromir and knelt down beside him, "Come, Boromir. I'll help you to the nearest bed."
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
None of the other six pregnant males were even aware of what was going on with Boromir and Faramir. Eomer, Legolas, Frodo and Pippin were all sitting around a table eating Frodo's jam (with the exception of Frodo who hated jam) and watching Aragorn and Haldir have a really pathetic spar (considering their stomachs got in the way more often than not). They figured that if those two were going to be bitchy at least they could just take it out on each other.
And then Pippin had to go and ruin it, "Um...Aragorn...you're leaking."
Aragorn looked down to see what Pippin was talking about then his eyes widened when he realized his water had broken, "Aw crap!"
Haldir laughed at the look of dismay on Aragorn's face. That was until Aragorn fixed the elf with an evil stare, "Don't laugh, Haldir. You're right behind me."
Eomer, Legolas, Frodo and Pippin all burst out laughing as Haldir looked down at his wet tunic and breeches. He then started swearing rather vilely in the Black Speech (conveniently forgetting that it made elves sick).
"HALDIR!!!"
Everyone winced as Haldir bowed his head in shame, "Sorry, Galadriel."
The elf queen came stomping into the clearing very angry. She stopped when she saw the elf and man standing there with wet tunics and leggings. Sighing she turned to Orophin and Rumil, who were sitting at another table, "You two...bring them to the healer's talan."
As Orophin and Rumil helped their brother and Aragorn out of the clearing Frodo stood up, "I'm gonna go make some jam."
Galadriel blinked as she took in the sight of the hobbit's soaked attire, "Um, Frodo...it appears you've gone into labor as well."
"Have I?" Frodo asked looking down, "Oh. Well, I guess making jam will have to wait."
Pippin suddenly whined, "What about me? I want to drink ale again. Why can't I go into labor?" He glared down at his stomach, "Get out. Get out! GET OUT!!!"
Frodo sighed, "Pippin, relax. Screaming won't help..."
As if on cue Pippin gave a small yelp and gingerly pulled his now wet tunic away from his body. Frodo cocked a brow, "Hmm, guess I was wrong."
Eomer chose then to start choking on his latest bite of bon bons dipped in ketchup (actually quite tasty minus the ketchup). As two more elves led the hobbits away Galadriel and Legolas looked at the king of Rohan as he clutched at his stomach just as a rush of liquid dampened his clothes.
Eomer met their gazes and gasped, "I don't think he liked that."
Legolas cocked a brow and smirked, "It's about time you found something he didn't like."
"Shut up, elf!" Eomer growled as he allowed Galadriel to lead him toward the healer's talan. Legolas followed behind for reasons known only to himself.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
From 7 different rooms came 7 different shouts.
"I won't have my baby born in this room until it's completely cleaned up!"
"Find that damn wizard! He's going to die for this!"
"Don't tell me to relax you over grown fairy! I've gotten stabbed by orcs and it hasn't hurt this much!"
"I need ale NOW or I'll never survive this!"
"I'd much rather be making jam right about now!"
"Please tell me you have something to numb the pain!"
"Okay, nothing I fed you could have been so bad it merits this treatment!"
Legolas, sitting calmly in the waiting room, suddenly snapped loud enough for everyone to hear, "What's with all the screaming?! It can't be that bad!"
As one seven voices chorused, "SHUT UP!!!!"
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
An hour later all of Lothlorien breathed a sigh of relief once all the babies were born. Okay, Legolas still hadn't given birth but he was so calm that no one worried about him. The 7 new daddies had been moved into one room since there were only 7 rooms total.
Legolas was standing over the bassinet beside Boromir's bed, lightly running his fingers through his daughter's strawberry blonde hair. With tears in his eyes he whispered, "She's perfect."
Boromir smiled, "She is isn't she?"
Before Legolas could reply Haldir spoke up, "So, Legolas, decided not to have yours today, huh?"
"Actually," Legolas said just as Galadriel walked into the room to check on the new daddies, "I've been in labor since before Aragorn, but it's really not that bad."
The 7 guys all growled at the elf, who had had no problems throughout his whole pregnancy.
"By the way," Legolas added, turning to Galadriel, "I need to be helped to a bed. This baby is ready to come."
"I hate you." Boromir growled.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
4 months later...
The eight guys all sat in a clearing in Lorien (why are they still in Lorien?). Haldir, Boromir, Faramir and Frodo all cuddled their daughters. Legolas, Aragorn, Eomer and Pippin held their sons (Sorry, we didn't want to come up with names so we'll just let you name them whatever you want to while you read it). Each male cuddled up to the side of his partner in parenthood.
It had been determined when both Frodo and Pippin had delivered full hobbit infants that Frodo's baby was Pippin's and Pippin's was Frodo's. Quite good news for both hobbits if you think about it.
Anyway, everything had gotten back to normal. Haldir was still arrogant but no longer bitchy. Aragorn was no longer homicidal. Boromir had stopped crying at the drop of a hat. Pippin was back to his happy-go-lucky self since he could once again drink ale. Eomer was once again eating normal foods, much to the relief of the cooks. Lorien was considerably messier since they'd lost their 'wonder maid' Faramir. Legolas was...well...Legolas. The only thing everyone missed was Frodo's jam (which he could no longer make).
"You know, Frodo," Pippin said, looking at the 'other' father of his children, "It's too bad you can no longer make that jam. It was really good."
"Yeah." Faramir agreed, "It really was."
"Well," Aragorn started, "We could always use that last of the male pregnancy potion to get him pregnant again."
"What?!" Frodo squeaked in alarm.
Galadriel chose then to walk up, having heard Aragorn's comment, "Sorry, Aragorn, but that won't be possible. I used up the last of that potion a couple months ago."
As one the eight guys whimpered, "On who?"
Before Galadriel could reply Gandalf's voice echoed through the woods as he yelled, "What the...GIMLI!!!!!!!!"
"Oh," the eight guys said, then, "Eeeewwww!"
Galadriel tilted her head thoughtfully to the side, "I foresee for the son of Gandalf and Gimli a fat man in a red suit delivering toys to all the children of Earth."
~End~
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
A/N: Okay, I realize this was a little abrupt but seeing as Brina is going to England for four months we wanted to get this story finished since it was so close to the end. That and we wanted to be able to say 'Hey! We finished a story!' since in like...6 years of writing together we've never finished a story before we got another idea we liked better.
As for all our loyal readers, thanks a bunch. It's been fun.
~Becky and Brina~
"The mop?" Galadriel asked.
"Yeah. I have to clean this up." Faramir said, motioning toward the floor.
Galadriel blinked, "Faramir, the floor can wait. You've started labor..."
"No!" Faramir gasped, horrified, "I can't leave this mess!"
"Come, we'll clean it up later." Galadriel said, trying to pull Faramir out of the room toward the nearest bed so he could lay down.
Faramir gave her a look that clearly said, "You're insane woman!' and planted his boots in place, "It...can...not...wait!!!! I'm not going anywhere until this mess is cleaned up!"
"Faramir..." Galadriel started.
"No!" Faramir interrupted, arms crossed.
"You're in..."
"No!"
"Can't you just..."
"No!"
"Stupid man!" Galadriel hissed.
"Get...the...mop."
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
A half hour later Boromir waddled into a situation where his brother was still arguing with Galadriel and asked, "What's going on?"
Galadriel sighed in relief, "Boromir, maybe you can talk some sense into your brother."
"Boromir! Get off the floor! I just cleaned!"
Boromir jumped at his brother's angry voice (quite a sight from someone who's 9 months pregnant), which unfortunately caused him to crash into a small table and go down with it.
"Boromir!" Faramir yelled, "I happened to like that table!"
Galadriel pressed two fingers to her temples before turning to the first two elves she saw, "Please get Faramir settled into a bed."
"But..." Faramir started.
"FARAMIR DON'T ARGE WITH ME!!!"
Faramir stared at Galadriel in shock but a contraction kept him from responding to Galadriel. He was then led away by the two elves taking deep, even breaths (Faramir, not the elves).
Sighing to herself Galadriel turned her attention to Boromir, who was still sitting on the ground among the pieces of the broken table, clutching his stomach and grimacing in pain.
"Boromir..." she started, walking toward him.
"It hurts." Boromir moaned.
'Great. Now I have two of them to deal with,' Galadriel thought as she walked up to Boromir and knelt down beside him, "Come, Boromir. I'll help you to the nearest bed."
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
None of the other six pregnant males were even aware of what was going on with Boromir and Faramir. Eomer, Legolas, Frodo and Pippin were all sitting around a table eating Frodo's jam (with the exception of Frodo who hated jam) and watching Aragorn and Haldir have a really pathetic spar (considering their stomachs got in the way more often than not). They figured that if those two were going to be bitchy at least they could just take it out on each other.
And then Pippin had to go and ruin it, "Um...Aragorn...you're leaking."
Aragorn looked down to see what Pippin was talking about then his eyes widened when he realized his water had broken, "Aw crap!"
Haldir laughed at the look of dismay on Aragorn's face. That was until Aragorn fixed the elf with an evil stare, "Don't laugh, Haldir. You're right behind me."
Eomer, Legolas, Frodo and Pippin all burst out laughing as Haldir looked down at his wet tunic and breeches. He then started swearing rather vilely in the Black Speech (conveniently forgetting that it made elves sick).
"HALDIR!!!"
Everyone winced as Haldir bowed his head in shame, "Sorry, Galadriel."
The elf queen came stomping into the clearing very angry. She stopped when she saw the elf and man standing there with wet tunics and leggings. Sighing she turned to Orophin and Rumil, who were sitting at another table, "You two...bring them to the healer's talan."
As Orophin and Rumil helped their brother and Aragorn out of the clearing Frodo stood up, "I'm gonna go make some jam."
Galadriel blinked as she took in the sight of the hobbit's soaked attire, "Um, Frodo...it appears you've gone into labor as well."
"Have I?" Frodo asked looking down, "Oh. Well, I guess making jam will have to wait."
Pippin suddenly whined, "What about me? I want to drink ale again. Why can't I go into labor?" He glared down at his stomach, "Get out. Get out! GET OUT!!!"
Frodo sighed, "Pippin, relax. Screaming won't help..."
As if on cue Pippin gave a small yelp and gingerly pulled his now wet tunic away from his body. Frodo cocked a brow, "Hmm, guess I was wrong."
Eomer chose then to start choking on his latest bite of bon bons dipped in ketchup (actually quite tasty minus the ketchup). As two more elves led the hobbits away Galadriel and Legolas looked at the king of Rohan as he clutched at his stomach just as a rush of liquid dampened his clothes.
Eomer met their gazes and gasped, "I don't think he liked that."
Legolas cocked a brow and smirked, "It's about time you found something he didn't like."
"Shut up, elf!" Eomer growled as he allowed Galadriel to lead him toward the healer's talan. Legolas followed behind for reasons known only to himself.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
From 7 different rooms came 7 different shouts.
"I won't have my baby born in this room until it's completely cleaned up!"
"Find that damn wizard! He's going to die for this!"
"Don't tell me to relax you over grown fairy! I've gotten stabbed by orcs and it hasn't hurt this much!"
"I need ale NOW or I'll never survive this!"
"I'd much rather be making jam right about now!"
"Please tell me you have something to numb the pain!"
"Okay, nothing I fed you could have been so bad it merits this treatment!"
Legolas, sitting calmly in the waiting room, suddenly snapped loud enough for everyone to hear, "What's with all the screaming?! It can't be that bad!"
As one seven voices chorused, "SHUT UP!!!!"
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
An hour later all of Lothlorien breathed a sigh of relief once all the babies were born. Okay, Legolas still hadn't given birth but he was so calm that no one worried about him. The 7 new daddies had been moved into one room since there were only 7 rooms total.
Legolas was standing over the bassinet beside Boromir's bed, lightly running his fingers through his daughter's strawberry blonde hair. With tears in his eyes he whispered, "She's perfect."
Boromir smiled, "She is isn't she?"
Before Legolas could reply Haldir spoke up, "So, Legolas, decided not to have yours today, huh?"
"Actually," Legolas said just as Galadriel walked into the room to check on the new daddies, "I've been in labor since before Aragorn, but it's really not that bad."
The 7 guys all growled at the elf, who had had no problems throughout his whole pregnancy.
"By the way," Legolas added, turning to Galadriel, "I need to be helped to a bed. This baby is ready to come."
"I hate you." Boromir growled.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
4 months later...
The eight guys all sat in a clearing in Lorien (why are they still in Lorien?). Haldir, Boromir, Faramir and Frodo all cuddled their daughters. Legolas, Aragorn, Eomer and Pippin held their sons (Sorry, we didn't want to come up with names so we'll just let you name them whatever you want to while you read it). Each male cuddled up to the side of his partner in parenthood.
It had been determined when both Frodo and Pippin had delivered full hobbit infants that Frodo's baby was Pippin's and Pippin's was Frodo's. Quite good news for both hobbits if you think about it.
Anyway, everything had gotten back to normal. Haldir was still arrogant but no longer bitchy. Aragorn was no longer homicidal. Boromir had stopped crying at the drop of a hat. Pippin was back to his happy-go-lucky self since he could once again drink ale. Eomer was once again eating normal foods, much to the relief of the cooks. Lorien was considerably messier since they'd lost their 'wonder maid' Faramir. Legolas was...well...Legolas. The only thing everyone missed was Frodo's jam (which he could no longer make).
"You know, Frodo," Pippin said, looking at the 'other' father of his children, "It's too bad you can no longer make that jam. It was really good."
"Yeah." Faramir agreed, "It really was."
"Well," Aragorn started, "We could always use that last of the male pregnancy potion to get him pregnant again."
"What?!" Frodo squeaked in alarm.
Galadriel chose then to walk up, having heard Aragorn's comment, "Sorry, Aragorn, but that won't be possible. I used up the last of that potion a couple months ago."
As one the eight guys whimpered, "On who?"
Before Galadriel could reply Gandalf's voice echoed through the woods as he yelled, "What the...GIMLI!!!!!!!!"
"Oh," the eight guys said, then, "Eeeewwww!"
Galadriel tilted her head thoughtfully to the side, "I foresee for the son of Gandalf and Gimli a fat man in a red suit delivering toys to all the children of Earth."
~End~
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
A/N: Okay, I realize this was a little abrupt but seeing as Brina is going to England for four months we wanted to get this story finished since it was so close to the end. That and we wanted to be able to say 'Hey! We finished a story!' since in like...6 years of writing together we've never finished a story before we got another idea we liked better.
As for all our loyal readers, thanks a bunch. It's been fun.
~Becky and Brina~