(WARNING!! THE END OF THIS CHAPTER BECOMES CORNY!! STARTS OFF NORMALLY WITH
JOKES AND ALL, BUT SLOWLY, BECOMES CORNY {think about it...Nessa starts to
think about something BESIDES Legolas} ALL WILL BE EXPLAINED IN NEXT
CHAPTER BECAUSE IT WOULDN'T MAKE SENSE IF WE EXPLAINED IT IN THIS
CHAPTER!!!!)
Frodo AM:
'Twas the night before the Fellowship left, and all through the castle, not a creature was stirring, not even......a........moussle?
Nessa AM:
You know you really suck at this....
Frodo AM:
::sob:: I know.....
Morwen AM:
Our Chistmas/Hanukkah special is OVER. You don't need to do that you know...
Frodo AM:
I got to seem like I'm working though!
Nerwen AM:
Why, though?
Frodo AM:
This is the only way Sam will go away!!
Sam AM (in another room):
Oh, Mr. Froooodooooooo? Are you done with your narration yet? The bed is getting rather cold.
Frodo AM:
HIDE ME!!
Morwen AM:
::grabs Frodo:: Let's go!!!
(Mission Impossible Theme Song Plays)
Tari AM:
::singing MI theme song:: Dum! Dum! Dumdum! Dum! Dum! Du-
Nerwen AM:
You can....stop.....
Tari AM:
--um.....ooo.....kay......sorry.....FEAR THE TURTLE!!
*** Adventures Of Elf Chasing
The Leaving Of The Fellowship Of The Ring (TLOTFOTR)
Nessa POV:
'Twas the nigh-- ::punched in the head by Morwen::
Morwen POV:
ANYways...... it was the night before the Fellowship left for...... the....... journey.... thing.... mount..... bad..... doom... ed...... thing.....YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!! Well.....a bunch of creatures were stirring... none of them moussles..... CAUSE THERE ARE NO MOUSSLES!! ::stares pointedly at Frodo:: Sam was looking for Frodo, Frodo was hiding in a broom closet (don't ask me how I can look at him through closet doors and don't ask me if Elven castles HAVE broom closet doors.......or broom closets for that matter) Well... Elrond was doing that whole "You are now leaving for a most perilous journey....blah blah blah....
Elrond POV:
No! LOOK AT THE EYEBROWS!!!! EYEBROWS!!!! ::eyebrows up...up.....and....they fall off....:: Damn! Now they all know my secret!
Morwen POV:
....Anyways..... sorry for that interruption..... ::picks up sticky eyebrow:: Wait......hey! This thing won't come off!! "NESSA!!!" I screamed. She ran over from where she was hidden behind Legolas, wiping off the drool with her sleeve. Legolas of course was looking for bandages for his ears which Nessa had tried to rip off.
"Yes'm?" she muttered. I showed her the eyebrow that wouldn't come off my thumb. "That's........ ::gasp:: YOU STOLE ELROND'S EYEBROWS!!"
I started to stutter... I diddn't know what to say! The thing was stuck! ARG!
Nerwen POV:
When I heard the racket, I was impelled to come into the room. There I found Arwen yelling at the two mortal girls, Nessa and Morwen.
"You stole Daddy's eyebrows!" she said.
"It's not my fault!" said Morwen. Luckily for the mortals, Aragorn came in and quelled Arwen's 'vicious' temper. Aragorn quickly established that The Eyebrow had found a new home and would not be leaving.
Morwen Pov:
You are Bob the Immortal Eyebrow! Bwa! Hahahahahahahahahahahahah!
Aragorn Pov:
Oh... kay...
Nessa Pov:
Nish! ...Onward!
~ Just outside of Rivendell on the First Day Of the Fellowship of the Ring's Quest Journey Thing (JOOROTFDOTFOTRQJT)~
Legolas Pov:
"...AND SHE WILL NOT LET GO OF MY EARS!" I growled at the mortal woman known as Nessa. Morwen, my good friend, found a large fallen tree branch and beat her off of me, as Gimli watched.
Tari AM:
I just realized how little we have comically attacked Gimli! Let's get that ugly little kid!
Morwen AM:
RIGHT ON!
Nessa AM:
Legolas?
Legolas POV:
Morwen then poked the Dwarf with the tree branch 'till he left.
Tari AM:
Who else haven't we comically attacked?!
Morwen POV:
Oh, Boooooooooromiiiiiiiiir!!!
Aragorn POV:
As I watched the human girls, Tari and Morwen, I was supprised to see them talking to Boromir. Morwen had succeeded in climbing on top of Boromir, and Tari was walking beside him.
"What is the Horn of Gondor, Boromir?", asked Tari. Boromir opened his mouth and smiled.
"Well. It depends which Horn you are talking about?" he said, puffing out his chest... attempting to be manly. They both squealed and ran away.
Tari POV:
After we discovered that there are TWO Horns of Gondor, ::shivers:: we found big huge pebbles, (bout the size of our fists), and chucked them at Boromir.
Morwen POV:
What a perverted freak...
Nessa POV:
After I was exhausted from chasing Legolas, I ran up to Tari and Morwen. "Whach'all talkin' bout?"
Morwen POV:
Nessa came up to us and asked us a stupid question. I tried to answer as kindly as I could. "Your too.... gifted.... to understand." I never said I was a nice person. Nessa then smiled and nodded. "I know....wait.....HEY!!!!" I will never understand that one....
Boromir POV:
I TRIED to explain to them the meaning of the second Horn of Gondor! I really did!!!
Aragorn POV:
Frodo's clairvoyance is rubbing off on me.... I can hear every thought in thy sick little head Boromir. As thy King, I command thee to SHUT THE HELL UP!!!
Boromir:
Yessir!!
Morwen A/M:
Aragorn SAVES THE DAY!!
Few Days Later as the Fellowship is Taking a Quick Breakish Thing (FDLATFITAQBishT) Nessa POV:
I don't really know where we are. Just as long as I am with my Leggy...right now he's sleeping...his EYES are OPEN....that's good....I like his eyes....they're purty... Boromir is teaching the Hobbits how to sword fight. Well...more like Merry and Pippin... Sam was putting up the act that he was cooking.... but he was really poking Frodo with a ladle, thinking he was flirting. Really he was scaring the poor boy.
Morwen was stealing potatoes from the cooking pot while Sam wasn't looking.
Morwen POV:
Po.......ta.......toes.......
Nessa POV:
I SWEAR something is supposed to happen. Either the Hobbits get drunk and merry-make... (that still reminds me of making Merry...which is scary....very...)or these crow things come... I can't quite remember. Well...either one is horrible....
Morwen POV:
I sat staring at Legolas as me, Tari, and Nessa sat to ourselves. "You know, I've only watched the first movie a few times....but....I'm pretty sure Legolas isn't supposed to be sleeping right now...I could have sworn he was the one who saw the demented crows...."
"Yeah!" yelled Nessa. Since Rivendell... it's been weird. I've almost forgotten Morwen and Nessa aren't our real names. And I also forgot that Tari's a Harry Potter freak... weird...
"Wh-What is that dark cloud?" asked one of the hobbits... I don't remember which one...Dammit! Grrrr... which one?!?!?!?!
Nessa POV:
At this point, I knew why it felt strange for Legolas to be asleep. HE was supposed to see the Crows! Morwen seemed to figure out at the same exact time....Whoa...I just noticed....we don't call each other by our names anymore... weird...ANYways... Morwen shot up and screamed "It's Crebain! From Dunedain!"
That was stupid. I screamed at her. "WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!? NOT DUNEDAIN!! HOW DUMB IS THAT!?" Apparently no one cared where the Crows were from. Gandalf started rushing everyone to get their stuff and hide. The cloud just got bigger and bigger.... closer and closer... Tari, Morwen, and Nerwen all ran to the bushes and beckoned me to come to. I knew I was forgetting something... I just KNEW... Just then, Morwen's eyes got REALLY big. Like she was looking at something behind me. I turned around and saw Legolas who was STILL sleeping.
"Nessa!" screamed Morwen. "You must have tired him out! That's why he won't wake up!!" I gasped as I realized she was right. I mean... elves are supposed to be Super Human... he should have been awake the SECOND he had a bad feeling... Morwen was too far to get Legolas, so was everyone else. I knew that if he woke up and I was remotely near him he would run away screaming like a banshee...I knew what I had to do.
Morwen POV:
Everyone was too far to get Legolas but Nessa. If he woke up and she was even remotely near him, he would run away screaming like a banshee. I had HOPED she would know what to do.... but....apparently...she didn't. She just...STOOD there. STOOD. She had her hands on her head and her eyes clutched shut. Oh....My...God...
Nessa POV (at that time):
Must.....concentrate.....save.....Legolas.....move.......fly......float..... .come to me Legolas......come....
Morwen POV:
Something weird happened then...Really really weird. Nessa's hair got lighter...and straighter....and....she was......a blond. I mean....in an instant. Then, I looked over at Tari. Her hair got darker, went from brown to black. It also got really really messy. I realized that my nails....were....long and weird. And I wasn't so pale anymore. And my ears were on the top of my head. Tari looked at me and screamed.
"Oh my God, Morwen! Your hair is WHITE!!" she screamed. I didn't get it. It didn't make any sense. But for some reason I had this urge to RUN and save Legolas. I guess Nessa did too. Later I figured out Tari also did, but, she didn't know what to do.
Nessa POV:
I knew I was different. I felt more...flexible...and stronger. And my hair didn't feel so heavy. When I opened my eyes, I saw that I was alone on the cliffy thingy, except for Legolas who was STILL sleeping. Just then, I felt this large breeze at my left. When I turned to look, all I saw was a huge flash of white. Next thing you know it, this freak with white hair was next to Legolas. MY Legolas!
"Hey!" I screamed. The white-haired person turned to look at me. Then I noticed that it was just Morwen...with white hair....and gold eyes....and....claws..... I decided it was time to run to her and Legolas, since the Crebain were so nearby. But....instead of running...I.....did a Round off... and then....a cartwheel....for your information....I've NEVER done a cartwheel....let alone a ROUND OFF! Well, I got to Legolas and Morwen and I helped her pick him up. Together we carried him to a the bushes. I don't remember much after that.
Gandalf POV:
The two girls, the Dark Maiden* and the Young One*, ran to get Legolas. There seemed to be a spell on them of some sort. The Dark Maiden had white hair instead of her usual light brown, and the Young One had blond hair instead of her usual dark brown. Young One's hair was also straighter. Dark Maiden ran at unimaginable speed to Legolas as the Crebain got closer and closer still. Young One did a series of jumps and twists that I never knew she could do...she tends to be what Tari describes as a "klutz".
They ran back to the bushes and hid Legolas. When they got there, I saw Tari poke her head out of the bushes. Her hair was darker and messier, and slightly shorter. She seemed to have a magical aura at that point. When Legolas was safe and out of harm's way, I saw the three girls collapse.
I also saw Sam trying to grope Frodo....that's.....disturbing. I'll have to have a talk with that one....
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Nessa :WE WELCOME ALL FLAMES BECAUSE WE KNOW AT THIS POINT, WE DESERVE THEM!!! SORRY THE END ISN'T ALL THAT FUNNY!!
Morwen: END ISNT FUNNY AT ALL!!
Nerwen: AND I'M HARDLY IN THIS CHAPTER!!
Nessa: ACTUALLY......wait....you're right....well....live with it.
Morwen: EVERYTHING WILL BE EXPLAINED LATER!!
Tari: Take out the marshmallows...
Nerwen: Why?
Morwen and Nessa: We're gonna get flamed on this one....
'Twas the night before the Fellowship left, and all through the castle, not a creature was stirring, not even......a........moussle?
Nessa AM:
You know you really suck at this....
Frodo AM:
::sob:: I know.....
Morwen AM:
Our Chistmas/Hanukkah special is OVER. You don't need to do that you know...
Frodo AM:
I got to seem like I'm working though!
Nerwen AM:
Why, though?
Frodo AM:
This is the only way Sam will go away!!
Sam AM (in another room):
Oh, Mr. Froooodooooooo? Are you done with your narration yet? The bed is getting rather cold.
Frodo AM:
HIDE ME!!
Morwen AM:
::grabs Frodo:: Let's go!!!
(Mission Impossible Theme Song Plays)
Tari AM:
::singing MI theme song:: Dum! Dum! Dumdum! Dum! Dum! Du-
Nerwen AM:
You can....stop.....
Tari AM:
--um.....ooo.....kay......sorry.....FEAR THE TURTLE!!
*** Adventures Of Elf Chasing
The Leaving Of The Fellowship Of The Ring (TLOTFOTR)
Nessa POV:
'Twas the nigh-- ::punched in the head by Morwen::
Morwen POV:
ANYways...... it was the night before the Fellowship left for...... the....... journey.... thing.... mount..... bad..... doom... ed...... thing.....YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!! Well.....a bunch of creatures were stirring... none of them moussles..... CAUSE THERE ARE NO MOUSSLES!! ::stares pointedly at Frodo:: Sam was looking for Frodo, Frodo was hiding in a broom closet (don't ask me how I can look at him through closet doors and don't ask me if Elven castles HAVE broom closet doors.......or broom closets for that matter) Well... Elrond was doing that whole "You are now leaving for a most perilous journey....blah blah blah....
Elrond POV:
No! LOOK AT THE EYEBROWS!!!! EYEBROWS!!!! ::eyebrows up...up.....and....they fall off....:: Damn! Now they all know my secret!
Morwen POV:
....Anyways..... sorry for that interruption..... ::picks up sticky eyebrow:: Wait......hey! This thing won't come off!! "NESSA!!!" I screamed. She ran over from where she was hidden behind Legolas, wiping off the drool with her sleeve. Legolas of course was looking for bandages for his ears which Nessa had tried to rip off.
"Yes'm?" she muttered. I showed her the eyebrow that wouldn't come off my thumb. "That's........ ::gasp:: YOU STOLE ELROND'S EYEBROWS!!"
I started to stutter... I diddn't know what to say! The thing was stuck! ARG!
Nerwen POV:
When I heard the racket, I was impelled to come into the room. There I found Arwen yelling at the two mortal girls, Nessa and Morwen.
"You stole Daddy's eyebrows!" she said.
"It's not my fault!" said Morwen. Luckily for the mortals, Aragorn came in and quelled Arwen's 'vicious' temper. Aragorn quickly established that The Eyebrow had found a new home and would not be leaving.
Morwen Pov:
You are Bob the Immortal Eyebrow! Bwa! Hahahahahahahahahahahahah!
Aragorn Pov:
Oh... kay...
Nessa Pov:
Nish! ...Onward!
~ Just outside of Rivendell on the First Day Of the Fellowship of the Ring's Quest Journey Thing (JOOROTFDOTFOTRQJT)~
Legolas Pov:
"...AND SHE WILL NOT LET GO OF MY EARS!" I growled at the mortal woman known as Nessa. Morwen, my good friend, found a large fallen tree branch and beat her off of me, as Gimli watched.
Tari AM:
I just realized how little we have comically attacked Gimli! Let's get that ugly little kid!
Morwen AM:
RIGHT ON!
Nessa AM:
Legolas?
Legolas POV:
Morwen then poked the Dwarf with the tree branch 'till he left.
Tari AM:
Who else haven't we comically attacked?!
Morwen POV:
Oh, Boooooooooromiiiiiiiiir!!!
Aragorn POV:
As I watched the human girls, Tari and Morwen, I was supprised to see them talking to Boromir. Morwen had succeeded in climbing on top of Boromir, and Tari was walking beside him.
"What is the Horn of Gondor, Boromir?", asked Tari. Boromir opened his mouth and smiled.
"Well. It depends which Horn you are talking about?" he said, puffing out his chest... attempting to be manly. They both squealed and ran away.
Tari POV:
After we discovered that there are TWO Horns of Gondor, ::shivers:: we found big huge pebbles, (bout the size of our fists), and chucked them at Boromir.
Morwen POV:
What a perverted freak...
Nessa POV:
After I was exhausted from chasing Legolas, I ran up to Tari and Morwen. "Whach'all talkin' bout?"
Morwen POV:
Nessa came up to us and asked us a stupid question. I tried to answer as kindly as I could. "Your too.... gifted.... to understand." I never said I was a nice person. Nessa then smiled and nodded. "I know....wait.....HEY!!!!" I will never understand that one....
Boromir POV:
I TRIED to explain to them the meaning of the second Horn of Gondor! I really did!!!
Aragorn POV:
Frodo's clairvoyance is rubbing off on me.... I can hear every thought in thy sick little head Boromir. As thy King, I command thee to SHUT THE HELL UP!!!
Boromir:
Yessir!!
Morwen A/M:
Aragorn SAVES THE DAY!!
Few Days Later as the Fellowship is Taking a Quick Breakish Thing (FDLATFITAQBishT) Nessa POV:
I don't really know where we are. Just as long as I am with my Leggy...right now he's sleeping...his EYES are OPEN....that's good....I like his eyes....they're purty... Boromir is teaching the Hobbits how to sword fight. Well...more like Merry and Pippin... Sam was putting up the act that he was cooking.... but he was really poking Frodo with a ladle, thinking he was flirting. Really he was scaring the poor boy.
Morwen was stealing potatoes from the cooking pot while Sam wasn't looking.
Morwen POV:
Po.......ta.......toes.......
Nessa POV:
I SWEAR something is supposed to happen. Either the Hobbits get drunk and merry-make... (that still reminds me of making Merry...which is scary....very...)or these crow things come... I can't quite remember. Well...either one is horrible....
Morwen POV:
I sat staring at Legolas as me, Tari, and Nessa sat to ourselves. "You know, I've only watched the first movie a few times....but....I'm pretty sure Legolas isn't supposed to be sleeping right now...I could have sworn he was the one who saw the demented crows...."
"Yeah!" yelled Nessa. Since Rivendell... it's been weird. I've almost forgotten Morwen and Nessa aren't our real names. And I also forgot that Tari's a Harry Potter freak... weird...
"Wh-What is that dark cloud?" asked one of the hobbits... I don't remember which one...Dammit! Grrrr... which one?!?!?!?!
Nessa POV:
At this point, I knew why it felt strange for Legolas to be asleep. HE was supposed to see the Crows! Morwen seemed to figure out at the same exact time....Whoa...I just noticed....we don't call each other by our names anymore... weird...ANYways... Morwen shot up and screamed "It's Crebain! From Dunedain!"
That was stupid. I screamed at her. "WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!? NOT DUNEDAIN!! HOW DUMB IS THAT!?" Apparently no one cared where the Crows were from. Gandalf started rushing everyone to get their stuff and hide. The cloud just got bigger and bigger.... closer and closer... Tari, Morwen, and Nerwen all ran to the bushes and beckoned me to come to. I knew I was forgetting something... I just KNEW... Just then, Morwen's eyes got REALLY big. Like she was looking at something behind me. I turned around and saw Legolas who was STILL sleeping.
"Nessa!" screamed Morwen. "You must have tired him out! That's why he won't wake up!!" I gasped as I realized she was right. I mean... elves are supposed to be Super Human... he should have been awake the SECOND he had a bad feeling... Morwen was too far to get Legolas, so was everyone else. I knew that if he woke up and I was remotely near him he would run away screaming like a banshee...I knew what I had to do.
Morwen POV:
Everyone was too far to get Legolas but Nessa. If he woke up and she was even remotely near him, he would run away screaming like a banshee. I had HOPED she would know what to do.... but....apparently...she didn't. She just...STOOD there. STOOD. She had her hands on her head and her eyes clutched shut. Oh....My...God...
Nessa POV (at that time):
Must.....concentrate.....save.....Legolas.....move.......fly......float..... .come to me Legolas......come....
Morwen POV:
Something weird happened then...Really really weird. Nessa's hair got lighter...and straighter....and....she was......a blond. I mean....in an instant. Then, I looked over at Tari. Her hair got darker, went from brown to black. It also got really really messy. I realized that my nails....were....long and weird. And I wasn't so pale anymore. And my ears were on the top of my head. Tari looked at me and screamed.
"Oh my God, Morwen! Your hair is WHITE!!" she screamed. I didn't get it. It didn't make any sense. But for some reason I had this urge to RUN and save Legolas. I guess Nessa did too. Later I figured out Tari also did, but, she didn't know what to do.
Nessa POV:
I knew I was different. I felt more...flexible...and stronger. And my hair didn't feel so heavy. When I opened my eyes, I saw that I was alone on the cliffy thingy, except for Legolas who was STILL sleeping. Just then, I felt this large breeze at my left. When I turned to look, all I saw was a huge flash of white. Next thing you know it, this freak with white hair was next to Legolas. MY Legolas!
"Hey!" I screamed. The white-haired person turned to look at me. Then I noticed that it was just Morwen...with white hair....and gold eyes....and....claws..... I decided it was time to run to her and Legolas, since the Crebain were so nearby. But....instead of running...I.....did a Round off... and then....a cartwheel....for your information....I've NEVER done a cartwheel....let alone a ROUND OFF! Well, I got to Legolas and Morwen and I helped her pick him up. Together we carried him to a the bushes. I don't remember much after that.
Gandalf POV:
The two girls, the Dark Maiden* and the Young One*, ran to get Legolas. There seemed to be a spell on them of some sort. The Dark Maiden had white hair instead of her usual light brown, and the Young One had blond hair instead of her usual dark brown. Young One's hair was also straighter. Dark Maiden ran at unimaginable speed to Legolas as the Crebain got closer and closer still. Young One did a series of jumps and twists that I never knew she could do...she tends to be what Tari describes as a "klutz".
They ran back to the bushes and hid Legolas. When they got there, I saw Tari poke her head out of the bushes. Her hair was darker and messier, and slightly shorter. She seemed to have a magical aura at that point. When Legolas was safe and out of harm's way, I saw the three girls collapse.
I also saw Sam trying to grope Frodo....that's.....disturbing. I'll have to have a talk with that one....
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Nessa :WE WELCOME ALL FLAMES BECAUSE WE KNOW AT THIS POINT, WE DESERVE THEM!!! SORRY THE END ISN'T ALL THAT FUNNY!!
Morwen: END ISNT FUNNY AT ALL!!
Nerwen: AND I'M HARDLY IN THIS CHAPTER!!
Nessa: ACTUALLY......wait....you're right....well....live with it.
Morwen: EVERYTHING WILL BE EXPLAINED LATER!!
Tari: Take out the marshmallows...
Nerwen: Why?
Morwen and Nessa: We're gonna get flamed on this one....