Disclaimer: I own nothing, except my life and money.
Anime_rulez: I'm back from Thailand. The things there are sooooo cheap!
Legolas: Have you bought what I told you to?
Anime_rulez: Oh! Of course.er.. I didn't! Don't pin me on the wall with your arrows! -__-;;
Legolas: Too late.face my arrows!
Anime_rulez: *gets pinned on the wall*
Next chapter up and now I know what it is like to have a writer's block.:P Anyway, is anybody out there willing to read my entries? Of course, you will get to edit the story and put your own ideas. ^_______________^ Email me.
Lesson 3: Your manners
This lesson is to teach you how to cope with the various races in Middle Earth if you ever meet them or unintentionally bump into them.
1) Hobbits:
If you have meet them in any of your journeys, be nice, especially if you are called to a 'Secret Council'. For once, they may be carrying a Ring of Power and you may be listed in the hall of fames (don't mind about the dwindling of elves, bah, how could I still rule in Mirkwood after the ring is destroyed). Say something spiffy, or better, follow any smart guy's words like, "You have my bow".
If you bump into them, still treat them nicely (What? Do you want me sweep them aside or kill them? Oops.pretend I never said that). Or else, ignore them. But still, I must warn you that they may have a Ring of Power. :P
2) Dwarves
Meet them: This is tricky. Try to compose yourself so as not to spout any insults at them. If you really have to vent your anger on their insolence, take a picture of them and have it enlarged. Throw darts at the picture. Better still, call on some friends to play a game with you. Just name parts of the picture (for example, the nose) and put a number on it. Then, aim your darts at these places to score the highest. Fun, isn't it? Soon, your anger should disappear. However, some dwarves may have a sense of humour and respect. Befriend them. Having a friend outside your race can have its advantages.
Bump into them: Pretty predictable. The dwarf will spout sarcasm in your face before you even speak a word. You can choose what you want to do. The best way will be to return the 'favour'. But before you do just that, work on your speech. You don't want any of them to start spreading your defeat to any other people. You know how Gimli raved on about his cousin Balin. Pretty soon, everyone will know you. You can firstly experiment on that gay pizza guy. If hearing your words makes him so ashamed that he turns back from gay to being straight, viola, you've done it.
3) Orcs
Meet them: Do I even have to say this? Kill them. Or if you are those "heart is so pure you would not even hurt an ant" sort, fine, use the way in lesson two. Strap him on a chair and play Barney songs to him. Don't ever go soft on him. Buy some earplugs or anything that can stop him from uttering his tortured cries. Remember, he may revert to the elf we once know.
Bump into them: What is happening here? You are not supposed to bump into them! You have perfect eyesight! I don't see how you could have done that. Work on your eyesight. Anyway, if this really happens, kill it immediately or you may have to suffer the consequences. You know we can be killed.
4) Men
Meet them: This is your time to show off what ever you've learnt. Treat them with respect no matter how unsightly they may be (hint, hint). Of course, you still have to retain your pride.
Bump into them: Great job bumping into a man! Just be careful next time. They can be awfully suspicious and if you catch them off their guard, just watch out for your neck.
5) Wizards:
Meet them: Give them the outmost respect you can offer. Maybe they will be kind enough to let you off to a little adventure where you can earns loads of money, or get yourself published in a top-selling book (don't mind about the 'you may be killed' part, heh, heh).
Bump into them: I suggest you should work on your eyesight. Bumping into one may cause you to be turn into something 'unnatural'. Look on the bright side, at least you won't be killed.
Anime_rulez: Chapter three at last!
Legolas: *still staring angrily*
Anime_rulez: Sorry. can you let me down?
Legolas: *still staring*
Anime_rulez: Review! T_T
Anime_rulez: I'm back from Thailand. The things there are sooooo cheap!
Legolas: Have you bought what I told you to?
Anime_rulez: Oh! Of course.er.. I didn't! Don't pin me on the wall with your arrows! -__-;;
Legolas: Too late.face my arrows!
Anime_rulez: *gets pinned on the wall*
Next chapter up and now I know what it is like to have a writer's block.:P Anyway, is anybody out there willing to read my entries? Of course, you will get to edit the story and put your own ideas. ^_______________^ Email me.
Lesson 3: Your manners
This lesson is to teach you how to cope with the various races in Middle Earth if you ever meet them or unintentionally bump into them.
1) Hobbits:
If you have meet them in any of your journeys, be nice, especially if you are called to a 'Secret Council'. For once, they may be carrying a Ring of Power and you may be listed in the hall of fames (don't mind about the dwindling of elves, bah, how could I still rule in Mirkwood after the ring is destroyed). Say something spiffy, or better, follow any smart guy's words like, "You have my bow".
If you bump into them, still treat them nicely (What? Do you want me sweep them aside or kill them? Oops.pretend I never said that). Or else, ignore them. But still, I must warn you that they may have a Ring of Power. :P
2) Dwarves
Meet them: This is tricky. Try to compose yourself so as not to spout any insults at them. If you really have to vent your anger on their insolence, take a picture of them and have it enlarged. Throw darts at the picture. Better still, call on some friends to play a game with you. Just name parts of the picture (for example, the nose) and put a number on it. Then, aim your darts at these places to score the highest. Fun, isn't it? Soon, your anger should disappear. However, some dwarves may have a sense of humour and respect. Befriend them. Having a friend outside your race can have its advantages.
Bump into them: Pretty predictable. The dwarf will spout sarcasm in your face before you even speak a word. You can choose what you want to do. The best way will be to return the 'favour'. But before you do just that, work on your speech. You don't want any of them to start spreading your defeat to any other people. You know how Gimli raved on about his cousin Balin. Pretty soon, everyone will know you. You can firstly experiment on that gay pizza guy. If hearing your words makes him so ashamed that he turns back from gay to being straight, viola, you've done it.
3) Orcs
Meet them: Do I even have to say this? Kill them. Or if you are those "heart is so pure you would not even hurt an ant" sort, fine, use the way in lesson two. Strap him on a chair and play Barney songs to him. Don't ever go soft on him. Buy some earplugs or anything that can stop him from uttering his tortured cries. Remember, he may revert to the elf we once know.
Bump into them: What is happening here? You are not supposed to bump into them! You have perfect eyesight! I don't see how you could have done that. Work on your eyesight. Anyway, if this really happens, kill it immediately or you may have to suffer the consequences. You know we can be killed.
4) Men
Meet them: This is your time to show off what ever you've learnt. Treat them with respect no matter how unsightly they may be (hint, hint). Of course, you still have to retain your pride.
Bump into them: Great job bumping into a man! Just be careful next time. They can be awfully suspicious and if you catch them off their guard, just watch out for your neck.
5) Wizards:
Meet them: Give them the outmost respect you can offer. Maybe they will be kind enough to let you off to a little adventure where you can earns loads of money, or get yourself published in a top-selling book (don't mind about the 'you may be killed' part, heh, heh).
Bump into them: I suggest you should work on your eyesight. Bumping into one may cause you to be turn into something 'unnatural'. Look on the bright side, at least you won't be killed.
Anime_rulez: Chapter three at last!
Legolas: *still staring angrily*
Anime_rulez: Sorry. can you let me down?
Legolas: *still staring*
Anime_rulez: Review! T_T