1.9.03

Hisoka spent no time getting dressed and ushering Watari and Tsuzuki out of his house. They all stood beneath his tree house wondering what to do next.

"O.k. So let me get this straight. Watari flung crap at God and caused the Apocalypse?" Hisoka said, still a little distraught about the sudden death of his cat.

"Yeah…that's pretty much it." Tsuzuki confirmed nodding his head.

"For Christ sake Watari why do you insist on being a fucking idiot all the time?" Hisoka screamed at the scientist.

Tsuzuki's head then got deformed and his eyes got freakishly large "WATARI-CHAN IS A BAKA-DESU! AND IS TOTALLY NOT SUGOI AND KAWAII LIKE POCKY! ARIGATO SUMIMASEN NEKO NEKO INU-PUPPY POCKY BAKA" he screamed.

Hisoka glared in response to Tsuzuki's spastic outburst and slapped him across the face. Tsuzuki just stood there silently staring blankly into nowhere.

"Fuck'n moron." Hisoka mumbled under his breath, "Anyways we need to do something about this or we're all going to die." The blonde stated.

Watari sat against the tree with a forlorn look on his face, "I'm sorry guys…I just couldn't help myself…I didn't mean to cause world wide destruction…" he gently stroked the fluffy under belly of 003 who just cooed in bliss, ignorant of the situation. Suddenly a shot was heard and the little owl exploded into little bloody chunks.

"Creepy bird people," Hisoka commented as he placed the pistol back in his pants, "No one wants to see you do that in public anyways."

"Your disgusting! I'm not into bird-human relationships anymore! I learned with the GuShoShin brothers a long time ago." Watari screamed at the boy while looking down at his now very icky looking friend.

"Eh…Whatever…Now think of a way to fix this before I shoot off your johnson."

Watari's face turned green at the thought of his beloved "johnson" being shot off and then regenerating only to be shot off an infinite number of times after.

Suddenly out of nowhere a giant puff of smoke appeared before them.

"Did somebody say 'Squeek-E-Clean' brand dishwashing detergent?!" Muraki asked enthusiastically.

"Uh…no..." Hisoka said staring at the now very disappointed man.

"Really? Oh shit? I'm not at the studio am I?" He said looking around a bit.

"Studio?" Tsuzuki asked

"Yeah after I realized I could never win against you guys, I got a job on children's show I'm 'Raffy the Dish Washing man' I advertise dishwashing detergent and teach children basic skills of life with my faithful companion Saki."

"Wait. Saki? Floating head, Saki?" Tsuzuki asked still a little in shock.

"Why yes!" Muraki beamed as he whipped out his severed head, he took all the wires off and stuck a wooden stick with a leaver on in up into the hole where the spinal chord was supposed to go.

"Hi there kids!" He said in a distorted voice as he made Saki's decaying mouth move a little pit of puss oozed from the corner of the corps's mouth and splattered on Hisoka's face.

"I think I'm going to vomit" Hisoka said as he ran behind the tree, a few retching noises could be heard.

"Dude…that's disgusting…," Tsuzuki commented, "At least put that thing in some formaldehyde. God!"

"Oh hey that reminds me!" Hisoka screamed from behind the tree, "The Apocalypse is coming think you could help out?"

"What? The world is ending now? I was hopping I could start my life anew and slowly live my life working for children to repent for my many sins…" Muraki looked off into the distance with a sorrowful face, the wind blew his white hair around his face and a tear slid down the side of his pale face. Suddenly his fake eye popped out of its socket and rolled around on the ground.

"Damn it!" Muraki cursed as he bent down to pick up his eye ball "This always happens when I get emotional…" His hand felt through the grass to find his eye when his hand met with another causing Muraki to gasp.

Tsuzuki picked up the sad eyeball and held it in his hand. "Muraki...We can not combat this on our own…Will you help us?" He said as he stared into Muraki's eye and empty socket. He then gently caressed the pale man's face and pushed his eye back into its rightful place, it made a small squish noise and something oozed out from the sides but Tsuzuki didn't mind.

"Oh, Tsuzuki…" The doctor said with a sigh. "I'll do anything for you." He then took Tsuzuki into his arms and they began to ravage each other.

"Fuck you both…" Hisoka said in a sing song voice still heaving behind the tree.

T.b.c…

These type of stories are always so fun to write when I'm stressed…;) R&R.