Emotion
Disclaimer: I don't own RK, or the song My Immortal by Evanescence.
Chapter 3: My Immortal/At Tomoe's Grave
Brief Summary: On the last day at Kyoto, Kenshin visit's Tomoe's grave, and comes to terms with her and her death.
Warning: None, except very sad stuff.
*** *** ***
(((My immortal.
I'm so tired of being here,
Suppressed by all of my childish fears.)))
"Ten years." Himura Kenshin whispered softly as he stared at the weather beaten tombstone before him. The rain pounded slowly onto the ground. It had faded into a drizzle that morning, but was enough to make the rurouni wet.
Etched on roughly, was a single word.
Tomoe.
No other words. Just a simple 5 letters.
But they meant more to Kenshin then the entire alphabet.
She was the reason he had forever avoided Kyoto for so long. Painful memories, bringing pain to others. But it was Tomoe that had stopped him from returning. The fear that somehow she would still be here, and accuse him. But, the mere memory of him made him afraid.
But the fear was conquered, perhaps. He was here.
"Your gone Tomoe...but I can feel you everywhere. I see your face with every thought, every step I see you. I'm sorry." He whispered softly, hesitantly reaching out to touch the cold stone.
"Sometimes I wish you would leave me alone....but I don't want you to other times. I'm so confused."
(((And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone.)))
"I hurt you." Kenshin's voice was choked, "I hurt you so badly. Why am I the one who feels the pain? I was Battousai. I killed so many, and felt nothing. But after ten years, I still cannot accept the fact I killed you."
He clenched his fist, squeezing his eyes shut, "God, it hurts so bad!"
(((These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase)))
He opened them, and felt his thick red hair matted to his face, covering the cross shaped scar. How he wanted to erase time, and stop her from getting in the way of his blow! But you cannot change the past, and you cannot bring a person back to life. That's the way things were.
"My life has been bad luck, Tomoe. Except when I met you."
He smiled softly, "I wished we could have spent an eternity together. I could have made you happy. You made me happy. So happy, Tomoe. I would have been your hero. I should have been your hero. I should have saved you."
The rurouni pressed his palm against the moist earth, "I'm no hero to you."
(((When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me)))
Looking back up, he cocked his head, breathing out a little sigh, "God...I live at the dojo now, with Miss Kaoru. I'm a peaceful wanderer now, that I am...Sano, Yahiko, Megumi, Kaoru, they don't know how I feel. They think of me as Kenshin. But you knew me as Battousai. And I regret that every day."
"They have no idea of the nightmares I suffer from every night. They don't know how it feels to wake up every morning and know that you have a bloody past you wish you could forget. Sano may. He has his own memories of the revolution. But he will never understand what I do through, day by day."
He coughed gently, "I love you, Tomoe, but at the thought of you, my mind takes two sides and I cannot choose if I'd want to forget you, or bask in the memories we had."
(((You used to captivate me
By your resonating life
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away
All the sanity in me)))
"But I know what I must do now." He said, and placed his hand out once again to rest on the stone, warm hand meeting cold rock.
"I am dying, but alive, Tomoe. I will keep living."
(((These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase)))
"I will accept your death, but I will always keep you near."
(((When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me)))
"I will keep living for you, that I will. You will always be with me Tomoe."
The rurouni bent his head down, and murmured a silent prayer for the woman he lost. The seconds ticked into minutes, into an eternity of steady raindrops.
"Kenshin..."
(((I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along)))
Hiko's voice behind him was soft, unlike the usual gruff sarcasm. The former manslayer did not turn around. They both acknowledged each other without words. Hiko stood still behind him, as Kenshin finished his prayer, and stood up.
Bending down, he placed a flower at the base of the stone, and turned to face his master, who sighed a little.
The two men started out of the grave site. Yet, before Tomoe's grave faded into the drizzle, Kenshin turned, red bangs swishing into his violet eyes, as he mouthed three little words.
(((When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me)))
"I love you."
*** *** ***
A/N: This chapter is basically my version of what happened at Tomoe's grave in that episode of RK. I know it's not correct, and I changed a lot, but I like this. It's depressing. Depressing is good.
And to my one reviwer...-drumroll-
-tackles- I love you!
The End...
Sneak Preview for Chapter Three!
... But he had once told himself he would never say goodbye to her. It was when he had said on that day she learned he was Battousai, that he may just leave one day. Yet in his heart, he felt the Kamiya dojo would be his true home, and it was a true home, and it would always be one.
So why was he leaving it behind?
Why was he leaving her behind?
(((I'll never leave you behind Or treat you unkind I know you understand And with a tear in my eye Give me the sweetest goodbye That I ever did receive)))...
Dundundun!!!!
Disclaimer: I don't own RK, or the song My Immortal by Evanescence.
Chapter 3: My Immortal/At Tomoe's Grave
Brief Summary: On the last day at Kyoto, Kenshin visit's Tomoe's grave, and comes to terms with her and her death.
Warning: None, except very sad stuff.
*** *** ***
(((My immortal.
I'm so tired of being here,
Suppressed by all of my childish fears.)))
"Ten years." Himura Kenshin whispered softly as he stared at the weather beaten tombstone before him. The rain pounded slowly onto the ground. It had faded into a drizzle that morning, but was enough to make the rurouni wet.
Etched on roughly, was a single word.
Tomoe.
No other words. Just a simple 5 letters.
But they meant more to Kenshin then the entire alphabet.
She was the reason he had forever avoided Kyoto for so long. Painful memories, bringing pain to others. But it was Tomoe that had stopped him from returning. The fear that somehow she would still be here, and accuse him. But, the mere memory of him made him afraid.
But the fear was conquered, perhaps. He was here.
"Your gone Tomoe...but I can feel you everywhere. I see your face with every thought, every step I see you. I'm sorry." He whispered softly, hesitantly reaching out to touch the cold stone.
"Sometimes I wish you would leave me alone....but I don't want you to other times. I'm so confused."
(((And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone.)))
"I hurt you." Kenshin's voice was choked, "I hurt you so badly. Why am I the one who feels the pain? I was Battousai. I killed so many, and felt nothing. But after ten years, I still cannot accept the fact I killed you."
He clenched his fist, squeezing his eyes shut, "God, it hurts so bad!"
(((These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase)))
He opened them, and felt his thick red hair matted to his face, covering the cross shaped scar. How he wanted to erase time, and stop her from getting in the way of his blow! But you cannot change the past, and you cannot bring a person back to life. That's the way things were.
"My life has been bad luck, Tomoe. Except when I met you."
He smiled softly, "I wished we could have spent an eternity together. I could have made you happy. You made me happy. So happy, Tomoe. I would have been your hero. I should have been your hero. I should have saved you."
The rurouni pressed his palm against the moist earth, "I'm no hero to you."
(((When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me)))
Looking back up, he cocked his head, breathing out a little sigh, "God...I live at the dojo now, with Miss Kaoru. I'm a peaceful wanderer now, that I am...Sano, Yahiko, Megumi, Kaoru, they don't know how I feel. They think of me as Kenshin. But you knew me as Battousai. And I regret that every day."
"They have no idea of the nightmares I suffer from every night. They don't know how it feels to wake up every morning and know that you have a bloody past you wish you could forget. Sano may. He has his own memories of the revolution. But he will never understand what I do through, day by day."
He coughed gently, "I love you, Tomoe, but at the thought of you, my mind takes two sides and I cannot choose if I'd want to forget you, or bask in the memories we had."
(((You used to captivate me
By your resonating life
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away
All the sanity in me)))
"But I know what I must do now." He said, and placed his hand out once again to rest on the stone, warm hand meeting cold rock.
"I am dying, but alive, Tomoe. I will keep living."
(((These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase)))
"I will accept your death, but I will always keep you near."
(((When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me)))
"I will keep living for you, that I will. You will always be with me Tomoe."
The rurouni bent his head down, and murmured a silent prayer for the woman he lost. The seconds ticked into minutes, into an eternity of steady raindrops.
"Kenshin..."
(((I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along)))
Hiko's voice behind him was soft, unlike the usual gruff sarcasm. The former manslayer did not turn around. They both acknowledged each other without words. Hiko stood still behind him, as Kenshin finished his prayer, and stood up.
Bending down, he placed a flower at the base of the stone, and turned to face his master, who sighed a little.
The two men started out of the grave site. Yet, before Tomoe's grave faded into the drizzle, Kenshin turned, red bangs swishing into his violet eyes, as he mouthed three little words.
(((When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me)))
"I love you."
*** *** ***
A/N: This chapter is basically my version of what happened at Tomoe's grave in that episode of RK. I know it's not correct, and I changed a lot, but I like this. It's depressing. Depressing is good.
And to my one reviwer...-drumroll-
-tackles- I love you!
The End...
Sneak Preview for Chapter Three!
... But he had once told himself he would never say goodbye to her. It was when he had said on that day she learned he was Battousai, that he may just leave one day. Yet in his heart, he felt the Kamiya dojo would be his true home, and it was a true home, and it would always be one.
So why was he leaving it behind?
Why was he leaving her behind?
(((I'll never leave you behind Or treat you unkind I know you understand And with a tear in my eye Give me the sweetest goodbye That I ever did receive)))...
Dundundun!!!!