Disclaimer- I don't own Jerry Springer or the Charmed characters. Please
don't sue me cause I'm only a little kid and I don't need to be in court
anymore plus I'm in enough trouble already.
Jerry Springer- My Life Is Charmed
~_~_~_~_~_Summary~_~_~_~_~_~_
The Charmed Characters go own the Springer show to resolve some family problems and revel some horribly (hilarious) secrets!
~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~
#4- Islands of the Amazons
~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~
Jerry is wheeled in his body in a full cast. The microphone is strapped to the top of his head and hanging over the spot where his mouth should be.
"Hey everybody we're back. Sorry but that Tommy the Clown fellow caught me during the commercial and beat my ass some more. Of course I put up a good fight but his friends came and helped him beat me up I had him on the run."
~Flashback~
Jerry is pissing in the bathroom stall. "Oh yea, shake it once that's fine. Shake it twice that's okay, shake it three times baby, four, five, and six."
Tommy the Clown walks in. "BITCH!" Jerry falls on the ground and starts screaming like a girl. "Uh, I ain't even, fuck it." Tommy starts stomping on Jerry and runs.
"Go to a fucking commercial." Jerry moans. "You're alone in the bathroom Jerry." the bathroom butler says in a whisper.
"Damn it."
~End Flashback~
"YOU SUCK JERRY HE KICKED YOUR ASS!" Jerry starts to cry. "WHY DON'T YOU JUST QUIT MOANING LIKE A WITTLE BITCH AND BRING OUT THE NEXT GUESS ASSHOLE!"
"Fine then," he sobs. "Our next guests *sniff* are here to tell the man they slept with *sniff, sniff* that their all pregnant. Ladies come on out." Jerry cries some more.
In a straight line one by one all of the women from the Amazon Island walk out and line up. Each holding one child some three and one had six. Finally 50 women later they finally crowd onto the stage and stand their proudly holding there mans children.
"Hey ladies." Jerry said stop crying. "So all of you had sex with this one man?"
"That's right Jerry," one of them said. "He fooled us all and slept with us then left the island and was gone. We're here to tell him. WE WANT OUR FUCKING CHILD SUPPORT!"
Jerry snickers. "We'll let's bring out the poor asshole-I mean let's bring him out. Here is Chris!"
Chris walks out looking confused and angry. He sits down roughly and folds his arms then crosses his legs. "HE SITS LIKE A GIRL!" Chris uncrosses them. "No I don't I just did it to look cool." He said back. "WELL YA DON'T LOOK COOL YA LOOK LIKE A DUMB BROAD WITH NOT TITS!"
"Shut the hell up." Chris mumbles. "WHAT WAS THAT?" "Nothing, nothing. So hey Jerry why am I here with all these beautiful Amazon women and children? Hey you guys had kids?"
"THERE YOURS DUMB ASS!" an Amazon shoots the guy with an arrow. "COOL MAN THIS IS THE BEST! I GOT A SUVINER ARROW IN MY HEART!" the guy shouts then collapses. The crowd claps with applause.
"Those Amazons are so giving." One of them whispers. "Uh-huh it's not everyday you get an arrow in the heart." "I WANT AN ARROW TO! ME TO! YEA ME TO!" Amazons start shooting everybody in the audience. "THANKS A MILLION!" the crowd screams then everybody falls down dead.
"You are very much welcome." The Amazon leader says. "Now Chris we are all here to tell you that these are your fucking kids and we want some god damn child support from you!"
"Hell yea we ain't raising no half Amazon half white lighter bastard children on our own!"
"FUCK YEA!"
Chris looks shocked. "Mine all mine? Please didn't a couple of you fuck Leo to?" Piper runs out. "WHO FUCKED LEO!?!" the Amazons point at Chris. "OH SO YOURE GAY TO HUH CHRIS? I'LL TEACH YA COCK SUCK'N ASS TO FUCK MY EX-HUSBAND!" Piper freezes Chris then blows him up.
"Hey now we can't get no child support! GET HER!" the Amazons jump Piper and beat her to a bloody pulp.
"HEY IT'S TIME FOR ANOTHER COMMERCIAL AND I AIN'T SAID NOTHING IN LIKE 15 LINES. WHAT'S UP WITH THAT?" Jerry screams at me.
"OH YOU WANT SOME TO?" the amazons start beating up Jerry.
Tommy the Clown walks out. "Oh damn, he ain't gone move for a while. Go to a commercial."
~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_
Hey well another chapter done. Not to many left now about two or three.or maybe one. I'm running out of Charmed characters. If you have a pair that I haven't done yet then tell me in the review otherwise the next chapter is the last. I've done Phoebe, Cole, Piper, Leo, Chris, Darrell + his wife, Chris, and the Amazons. I've got two more characters left for a special surprise so unless you got anymore characters in mind you wanna see on the show. "I See the Source," is the next and final chapter.
My thanks 2:
The Drow Elf Drizzt - any day now he'll crack any day.
Afro - Leo cheated at a gay MENs club he was with several guys and possibly Chris to.
ChArMeD 101 - 3RD COAST PLAYERS 4 LIFE DOG!
MauraC - every body a critic
Matt91 - thank u thank u
Jerry Springer- My Life Is Charmed
~_~_~_~_~_Summary~_~_~_~_~_~_
The Charmed Characters go own the Springer show to resolve some family problems and revel some horribly (hilarious) secrets!
~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~
#4- Islands of the Amazons
~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~
Jerry is wheeled in his body in a full cast. The microphone is strapped to the top of his head and hanging over the spot where his mouth should be.
"Hey everybody we're back. Sorry but that Tommy the Clown fellow caught me during the commercial and beat my ass some more. Of course I put up a good fight but his friends came and helped him beat me up I had him on the run."
~Flashback~
Jerry is pissing in the bathroom stall. "Oh yea, shake it once that's fine. Shake it twice that's okay, shake it three times baby, four, five, and six."
Tommy the Clown walks in. "BITCH!" Jerry falls on the ground and starts screaming like a girl. "Uh, I ain't even, fuck it." Tommy starts stomping on Jerry and runs.
"Go to a fucking commercial." Jerry moans. "You're alone in the bathroom Jerry." the bathroom butler says in a whisper.
"Damn it."
~End Flashback~
"YOU SUCK JERRY HE KICKED YOUR ASS!" Jerry starts to cry. "WHY DON'T YOU JUST QUIT MOANING LIKE A WITTLE BITCH AND BRING OUT THE NEXT GUESS ASSHOLE!"
"Fine then," he sobs. "Our next guests *sniff* are here to tell the man they slept with *sniff, sniff* that their all pregnant. Ladies come on out." Jerry cries some more.
In a straight line one by one all of the women from the Amazon Island walk out and line up. Each holding one child some three and one had six. Finally 50 women later they finally crowd onto the stage and stand their proudly holding there mans children.
"Hey ladies." Jerry said stop crying. "So all of you had sex with this one man?"
"That's right Jerry," one of them said. "He fooled us all and slept with us then left the island and was gone. We're here to tell him. WE WANT OUR FUCKING CHILD SUPPORT!"
Jerry snickers. "We'll let's bring out the poor asshole-I mean let's bring him out. Here is Chris!"
Chris walks out looking confused and angry. He sits down roughly and folds his arms then crosses his legs. "HE SITS LIKE A GIRL!" Chris uncrosses them. "No I don't I just did it to look cool." He said back. "WELL YA DON'T LOOK COOL YA LOOK LIKE A DUMB BROAD WITH NOT TITS!"
"Shut the hell up." Chris mumbles. "WHAT WAS THAT?" "Nothing, nothing. So hey Jerry why am I here with all these beautiful Amazon women and children? Hey you guys had kids?"
"THERE YOURS DUMB ASS!" an Amazon shoots the guy with an arrow. "COOL MAN THIS IS THE BEST! I GOT A SUVINER ARROW IN MY HEART!" the guy shouts then collapses. The crowd claps with applause.
"Those Amazons are so giving." One of them whispers. "Uh-huh it's not everyday you get an arrow in the heart." "I WANT AN ARROW TO! ME TO! YEA ME TO!" Amazons start shooting everybody in the audience. "THANKS A MILLION!" the crowd screams then everybody falls down dead.
"You are very much welcome." The Amazon leader says. "Now Chris we are all here to tell you that these are your fucking kids and we want some god damn child support from you!"
"Hell yea we ain't raising no half Amazon half white lighter bastard children on our own!"
"FUCK YEA!"
Chris looks shocked. "Mine all mine? Please didn't a couple of you fuck Leo to?" Piper runs out. "WHO FUCKED LEO!?!" the Amazons point at Chris. "OH SO YOURE GAY TO HUH CHRIS? I'LL TEACH YA COCK SUCK'N ASS TO FUCK MY EX-HUSBAND!" Piper freezes Chris then blows him up.
"Hey now we can't get no child support! GET HER!" the Amazons jump Piper and beat her to a bloody pulp.
"HEY IT'S TIME FOR ANOTHER COMMERCIAL AND I AIN'T SAID NOTHING IN LIKE 15 LINES. WHAT'S UP WITH THAT?" Jerry screams at me.
"OH YOU WANT SOME TO?" the amazons start beating up Jerry.
Tommy the Clown walks out. "Oh damn, he ain't gone move for a while. Go to a commercial."
~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_
Hey well another chapter done. Not to many left now about two or three.or maybe one. I'm running out of Charmed characters. If you have a pair that I haven't done yet then tell me in the review otherwise the next chapter is the last. I've done Phoebe, Cole, Piper, Leo, Chris, Darrell + his wife, Chris, and the Amazons. I've got two more characters left for a special surprise so unless you got anymore characters in mind you wanna see on the show. "I See the Source," is the next and final chapter.
My thanks 2:
The Drow Elf Drizzt - any day now he'll crack any day.
Afro - Leo cheated at a gay MENs club he was with several guys and possibly Chris to.
ChArMeD 101 - 3RD COAST PLAYERS 4 LIFE DOG!
MauraC - every body a critic
Matt91 - thank u thank u