Chrysalis Book 2: Rebirth

by Katzilla

Human-alien-relations. Androids. Telepathy. The worst killer in human history. Need I say more? Go, read (and review)! :-) And again, huge thanks to my co-writer and beta-reader Anise!

8. Chapter 8

'Entry 388:

It's done. The first step towards an ending none of us can foresee has been taken, and it was Eloise deJoria who took it – and not a moment too soon. I was right when I suspected that Darwin wouldn't want to lose any more time with the girl, because two days later, I was sent to collect her from the doctor's place. By then, of course, the damage had been done. I saw it in deJoria's face when she opened the door for us, wearing an expression of hidden satisfaction - and fright. Since I wasn't alone, I couldn't explicitly ask her how she had accomplished the deed, but her curt, almost unnoticeable nod shortly before she went into her tantrum over losing the girl was enough confirmation that she had. She will start displaying the first symptoms of Arcturian Fever tonight, Newt by tomorrow afternoon. We know they are both taking a high risk, all the more since it is well-known that the symptoms can be somewhat lessened if the appropriate medication is given within 24 hours after infection, but of course this road is not open to her. As soon as she's tested after displaying the first symptoms, they would find the antibiotic in her blood and know that something was up. No, they'll have to ride the disease out in its ugliest form. I don't envy them… and I can only hope that my bio-mechanical body is immune against the plague which is going to haunt these corridors in the coming days. What if I'm not? As a cyborg, using real blood and real flesh should make me vulnerable to viruses and bacteria. I never got to test it. And only now does it dawn on me that Darwin never assigned me to any project where I had to deal with virulent substances, even if these researches are always in demand.. I suppose that means she doesn't know herself and didn't want to risk me.

What if Darwin gets it? A cold feeling prickles down my scalp. Of course I thought of the possible implications, dozens and hundreds of times. Okay, she is not likely to visit the girl before she expects to see her in Lab 1, and – despite the seriousness of the disease – it is not that easy to get infected with Arcturian Fever. The virus doesn't travel by air. It doesn't mean she can't get it, but maybe I can keep her occupied in the Ivory Tower for those first hours where the virus is still undetected. After deJoria's case becomes known, they'll put up a quarantine for 48 hours to see who else has got it, effectively banning the danger of having all of Phooka's staff infected. The problematic time span should be a couple of hours, and I'm confident I can keep Darwin safe for that long... unless I'm a carrier myself now.

I've got to make sure I'm not before I see her. I touched the girl when I brought her up to her little room in the complex. I stroked her hair and told her reassuring bullshit, knowing full well how bad she would be feeling in about a day, Her taut little face telling me that she knew, too. Yes, I could be infected. Even though I saw to it that I went through decontamination under the pretense of having to talk to Hikahi afterwards. It could already be in my blood.

The guards that came with me to fetch her – on the other hand – should be safe. They didn't come in close contact with either the doctor or the girl. As I see it, I'm the only security risk right now. deJoria will know better than to run around on the station. In contrast to most of the people we're surrounded by, she's a responsible person. I wouldn't be surprised if she already excused herself from work, maybe under the pretense of not feeling too well. I just hope she didn't get too close to Hikahi. Her's and Newt's chances of making it would considerably lessen if our most gifted healer joined them in their suffering.

Once again the sheer thought of what could go wrong with this risky plan of mine leaves me in doubt whether I'm really doing the right thing. The path I chose to go down contains a great number of "if's". It could all go as planned, and it could just as easily all go to hell. What if – despite my efforts of keeping her out of the virus's way - Darwin still gets sick? What if she dies? I find myself unable to see it in my inner mind. Darwin's something like my human twin, so close to me that I tend to not even think of her as human anymore. Of course she can die. And if I'm the one to bring the virus to her…

This is a horrible thought. And there's another one, just as ugly, and with potentially more disastrous implications: What if I infect Hicks? He could die, too, and then? Or the virus could mutate in his body, becoming an even deadlier form, prone to wiping out human existence. Anything's possible! I would have liked to talk this through with Rogue. Maybe he would have had a better idea, but I don't dare raise him too often. Now that we're nearing the possible showdown each and every one of our conversations puts our plan at risk, each is a jeopardy to his 'great picture'. And now, it's too late to talk about it anyway. The disease will run its course and kill everyone in its wake and I all can do about it is watch and observe. I hate that feeling of helplessness. And I hate that feeling of uncertainty, of sitting here in Alexander's vacated room, waiting for the result of the test I managed to sneak out of Sickbay to determine whether I'm a host to one of the deadliest diseases known to man. And now his communicator springs to life, and I know they've found me. I'll finish this later.

"Isis? There you are! What are you doing in Alexander's room?" It's Skin, looking royally pissed. "Darwin's been looking for you all over!"

"Sorry, Skin. I thought I'd go through Alexander's files on Hicks and Raven again, see whether I missed something last time. After all, I need all the information I can possibly get," I explain in a casual tone. He shakes his head, cutting me off.

"Darwin's furious, and I've been wasting a lot of time finding your ass!"

"What's wrong?" Can't be deJoria. It's still too early.

"Something's going on in the soldier's cell. The camera just folded, and the sensor readings went belly-up, too. Darwin wants you to have a look. She'd go herself, but we're kinda busy with his evil twin right now."

Hicks – coming out of his chrysalis? His words electrify me, but on the outside, I manage to keep a cool expression.

"What are you doing with him?" I remember I heard her talking about a sequence of tests she wanted to submit Raven to. Strength. Agility. Control. I hear some ruckus explode behind my colleague, as well as a violent tug at my mind, the voice/mind-touch, unmistakably the killer's, and I'm glad I'm spared the experience. My own bio-electronic nature has enabled me to quickly learn how to control the transceiver at a rudimentary level and I'm able to ignore Raven's tirade, I give Skin the nod he's waiting for. "Tell her I'm on my way." '…as soon as I know whether I'm a danger to Hicks or not.'

"She's got the communicator with her and expects to hear from you as soon as you're there."

"It's urgent, I got that, Skin." I pretend to stand up and sign off, then sit down again as soon as the scrawny bio-engineer's face has vanished from the screen. I take the microscope with my blood-sample and retreat into a corner where he can't see me in case he calls again.

I barely dare to look through it. What if it shows me the image of my cells brimming with new, alien life? What if – 'Knock it off, Isis!'

I press my face against it… and feel a relief too great to feel comfortable. Nothing. I'm clean. For a moment, I allow myself to lean back and lose the painful tension that's been keeping me in its iron grip for the last couple of hours, in the back of my head wondering whether I was concerned for my own, bio-mech life – or the mission.

The mission. Hicks. I roll back with the chair, feeling a new wave of excitement roll through my body as I activate the VidCom, calling Security.

"Isis here. I need five guards in the lab complex, Corporal Hicks' cell, in ten minutes."

I hope I don't need them, but one can never be too safe. Who knows what kind of creature is roaming his room now? Is he still his old self? He can't be. While I leave my dead partner's room and make for the complex, I try to raise Hicks via the transceiver, just like I did in vain for the past five days. This time, I get an answer… a mishmash of half-finished, undefined images, raw, dark and murderous.

***

He awakens to a new world. A world of sound, of clicking, beeping, hissing and humming, all around him. Enveloping him just like the knowledge that they are close, too. His family. All waiting for him to come into existence. Urging him to wake and claim the new life he's been granted. The hive-mind is watching him and is there to guide him through his difficult task in this new world.

A world of odors. Electrical emissions, tasting metallic in his mouth. The smell of fabrics. Conditioned, filtered air… and human flesh. The smell jump-starts his stomach. He's hungry. Ravenous, in fact! Half-starved! He opens his eyes – to a too bright world, a searing, hurting white supernova of light. He hasn't even completed the thought when it's suddenly dimmed to a level more comfortable to his sensitive eyes. And he sees: He's lying on his back, on the bed in a room so utterly void of anything, it triggers the device in his head into reaching out. Searching for the one thing he knows is there, even if he can't put a name to it yet. Concentrating, he closes his eyes again and leans back. Envisions his home, an unconscious smile on his lips. Something is happening around him, he can feel it. As for himself… it's time to get out, to be born. Time to shed the hard shell still surrounding him, the shell that protected him while he was in the process of 'becoming'. Time to get out and satisfy his growling stomach. Something's headed his way right now, he can see it in his mind… something living, breathing: prey!

I come to a stop in front of Hicks' door and motion for the guards to get into position. I hesitate and reluctantly realize that I'm afraid to enter. What if he's a raving maniac, more alien than human? He'd attack me instantly, and I don't know whether I'm up to it, stasis-caster or not. Pretending to collect myself for the task at hand, I send another 'inner' message out to him – and get an instant answer. They are no human words though, only notions of an overwhelming amount of sensations, too many, too new for his still dazed, re-constructed brain to make sense of. Most of all one that worries me even more: Hunger. The sensation of a hole in the middle of my body.

I raise my hand with the remote, knowing that I will have to be fast. A short, tense nod to the guards, whose expressions speak for themselves. They think I'm crazy. Maybe I am. But I don't want them to shoot Hicks if he really attacks us. The plan's developed too far for five idiots to ruin everything in a fit of panic.

The cell-door slides back, and I take a fast step inside. Before I can even take a quick survey of the room, there's motion at the edge of my vision, so fast it's a blur even to me! I whirl around, force-field activated… and see Hicks crash against it and come to an abrupt halt. Even though I suspected an assault, his sight is a solid shock to me: Although he appears to be still obviously human, the predator's there, as well, out there in his body language. Cruel, metallic-gleaming eyes directed at me without remembrance, without human emotion, only looking to bring me down. Calculating, waiting for the slightest mistake. Muscles tense, stance crouched for another go. He's in full attack-mode.

"Dwayne? Dwayne, it's me, Isis!" I yell simultaneously in words and mind-talk, mesmerized by the wave of savageness I'm greeted with. "Stop it!" Behind me, I hear the guards stomp into the room, their collective gasp and then the 'whoosh' of their rising rifles. "Don't shoot!"

I don't dare to take my eyes of my opposite, even though I pick up the notion of massive change all around me. This cell –

"Leave. Stay outside. I can handle him."

A glint of secret amusement – I think – sparkles in the diamond-hard eyes in front of me, as Hicks raises from his crouch. Slowly. Still waiting for me to mess up. Starting to circle me. Looking for a weakness.

"Isis-"

For a moment, the hybrid's attention shifts to the men behind me, and I bet I can read his mind. 'Are they easier prey? How about attacking them?'

"That's an order!" I can't handle both a mutated marine and five reluctant guards at the same time. "Leave, dammit! You just agitate him!"

"I'm not sure-"

"Dammit, Sanchez, leave! Now!" They retreat reluctantly to the door. "Now close it! Guard the door. See that he doesn't get out. If something happens, call Darwin. But leave us alone for now!" Finally, the sound of the door closing shut. And silence. A deep, expectant, menacing silence, only accentuated by the omnipresent generator's hum. Hicks' attention returns to me, and mine to him. Finally, the moment I've been both dreading and waiting for. What am I dealt now?

The changes in his deceitfully human appearance are subtle, yet enormous at the same time: Outwardly, he's a mess of old, dried skin with parts of the chrysalis hanging in rags from his face, his neck, his entire body, together with rags from his clothing. Underneath, a new, slightly shiny skin with a gray hue can be seen. There's not a lot of it to see, yet, as he must have only just begun to shed his old hull when we disturbed him, but what I see looks almost like the skin of my early predecessors back in the days when they were just invented. Like an android. It's slick and wet, as if he's drenched in amnion fluid, his hair – I'm surprised he's still got hair! – plastered to his head.

It's the only bodily change I'm able to detect – apart from his drastically changed behavior. However, I know this can't be all.

'Dwayne? Are you in there? Come on, answer me!'

His eyes stab into mine, pierce me, an inquisitive, demanding look in them. Confused I can talk mind-talk too, huh? Finally, a reaction. An answer. An image.

'You're one of us?'

'You know I am, Dwayne. Come on, you can't tell me you don't remember me! Where's your human mind? Erased?'

Again, a very slight, very nasty smirk in the left corner of his mouth, before he abruptly turns around and retreats a few steps, seemingly having given up on overwhelming me for now. Only now that I don't have to focus exclusively on him anymore am I granted the opportunity to notice the massive changes in our surroundings: Behind him should be the table and chairs... but I don't see them there, at least not at first sight. Only a change of my range of vision confirms I'm still in his cell, and that the additions and alterations I'm standing in are in fact illusos. Hicks grants me the time to admire his work, and the more I absorb the details, the more I feel a chill run down my spine. I know for a fact that this illuso is no part of our programming. It's incredible, awe-inspiring and frightening at the same time. The room I'm standing in - it's a virtual hive, no different to what the xenomorphs on level 13 are living in, only smaller... and more elaborate. There's no part of the floor, ceiling and walls which aren't covered in the holographic, but solid-looking, organic substance that the aliens use for their building material. So solid in fact that the usually bright, fluorescent lights on the ceilings are completely blocked, the only light being the faint bluish-white glow covering the floor. Even the all-seeing cameras are invisible behind the illuso-barrier! It looks almost too real not to be true. And how did he do it?

'Like it?' Hicks turns around again, a superior, almost arrogant expression on his face I hadn't see on his face so far. Right now, he's a complete stranger to me. Incalculable. Dangerous. I dare not switch off the stasis-barrier.

'Impressive,' I decide to play along. 'How did you do it?'

'Nothing to it. Wanna see something else?'

Before I can answer, the walls grow toward me, the organic stuff spreading and reaching out with slimy tentacles. One starts to wrap itself around my neck. Again, Hicks looks amused.

'You want to scare me? You gotta do better than that!' I keep these thoughts to myself and deny him the satisfaction of being able to anger me. And maybe he doesn't even want to anger me, maybe he's simply in the middle of exploring his new senses, playing with them like a techno-freak would play with a new high-end stereo. Or, to use a more fitting image, like a child testing abilities it just picked up.

'Very nice,' I dismiss his little magic show. 'But I'm more impressed to see that you still know how to communicate in human language. So you must still be mostly human, right?'

He reaches up and slowly, deliberately, peels off a large chunk of old skin from his neck... and stuffs it into his mouth. Chewing it slowly, watching me. Oh yeah, he's definitely trying to have fun with me, but I'm used to gross sights, so he won't be able to get to me this way.

'We're no more human than you are. Less.'

'We'? I wonder, but decide for once to ignore it.

'Watch.'

Without warning, he smacks his fist against the wall… denting it! And busting all his knuckles! I don't flinch, even if I'm getting an impression of the white-hot bolt of pain he just caused himself before I can block his mind. What's even more disturbing is that I'm unable to detect that pain in his expression as he turns towards me, his hand dripping blood.

'Watch!' An ominous hiss rises from the floor, makes me hold my breath as I watch the holes spread on the floor.

'Oh shit…!' Our problems have just performed a quantum leap. I didn't think he'd develop the acid layer… and apparently, he didn't. His system turned it into blood – a deadly mutation. And he's surely intelligent enough to use it to his advantage, to burn his way through sensitive technology as far as he needs to to break out!

'That look human to you?' he mocks me, turning his hand around to let me have a good look at it. And I see what he means: The burst skin is already closing, then he wiggles his fingers at me in a parody of a wave I can't miss the fact that his bones are mending themselves at this unbelievable speed, too. I'm mesmerized. Stunned. So stunned I hardly feel the vibration of the communicator in my pocket. It's a million light years away right now as I'm beginning to understand what a capable opponent the new Hicks will be to us with these self-healing powers and set of high-tuned senses if his human mind can't take control.

All of a sudden I'm feeling very exposed and vulnerable in this room. If he wants to off me, he'll be able to do so any time once I switch the stasis-barrier off. And what tells me that he can't switch it off by himself with the transceiver in his head? Just like he altered the illuso? As if he were reading my mind, his attention shifts from his hand to mine. To the remote! I can virtually feel him reaching out! I don't dare take my attention from him even for a moment to answer Darwin's call.

'You can say or show me whatever you want, you still look mostly human to me,' I insist, just to say something, determined not to let him know how much his little show rattled me. 'I know you are.' He only smirks as a reply. I don't know what to make of it and follow his gesture, inviting me to look into his bedroom.

Forcing me to divert a part of my attention away from him for a moment, I take a quick peek. It looks the same as this one... the alien illuso-design, the darkness. Another change of vision shows me that his bed is soaking wet with the same liquid that's covering him. Bits and pieces of old skin and shards of the hard crust, the remains of the chrysalis, lie on the drenched, torn sheet. The console behind the bed, the one Darwin hooked him up to to monitor his vitals, has been smashed and rains down sparks onto the mattress from a hole approximately 10 cm in diameter. About the size of man's fist. After Hicks' little show of power, it's clear what happened to it.

'Too much noise,' my host explains simply, following my gaze. Looking in the opposite direction, I see that he also smashed the camera in the right corner of the ceiling. The glass is gone. Entirely gone. There are not even shards of it on the floor. Did he eat it? The communicator meanwhile buzzes away in my pocket. I haven't got time for it now. I know what happens if I don't answer it soon – the guards will come in and there will be dead people; or a dead hybrid - or both -because they're naturally going to assume that something happened to me and will be ready to fire at the first sign of trouble.

'We needed food,' Hicks says evenly, as if it were self-explanatory. 'Still do.' He eyes me again with obvious appetite. I turn to him again. 'We're fuckin' starved! Get us something, or-'

'What's the 'we'-shit, Dwayne?' I interrupt, puzzled, but at the same time mocking him. Poking fun at his display of superiority. 'Pluralis majestatis? Did she promote you to 'First Hybrid', or what?'

He doesn't smile, doesn't laugh. And moves closer, his rigid body-language an unmistakable threat. I tense, uncertain about his intentions.

'You think we're funny? You won't laugh once she takes command.' He comes to a halt in front of me and looks into my eyes with all the contempt he can muster. 'She knows you belong to them. You're shutting her out. You're not part of the stream. This makes you our enemy.'

'And what about you? They're your family now? You think you're part of them?'

'She talks to us, so we're part of her. Yes.'

'And you don't think she's just using you to get off the station? Do you really think she could stand the thought of half-humans belonging to her hive? How naive are you?'

'You know nothing.'

'But apparently more than you. I bet she doesn't grant you access to all her great secrets, right? Doesn't want you to know too much. She's keeping you dumb! I know what your queen wants from you.' I don't know whether it's smart to provoke him, but I want 'the old' Hicks back, so I need to rise to the challenge this … thing… in front of me presents. The human part of his mind can't be entirely gone, it has to be in there somewhere! I'll have to force him to come out, to make a stand. He can't hide forever.

As if I asked for more complications, the door slides open behind us.

"Not now!" I yell, while Hicks spins around, ready for battle. "Get out! I'm okay. I just can't take the call right now!"

"Darwin said-"

"I don't care what she said! Get out!"

Silence. Followed by the rustling of clothes and equipment and heavy footsteps, as they finally follow my order. I allow myself one deep breath before I'm in the hybrid's focus again.

'You don't.'

Where were we? Oh yes, me knowing about his queen's intentions.

'You bet I do. She's not the only one who's been eavesdropping…' Now it's my turn to smirk arrogantly, even if I don't feel like it. 'The stupid bitch thinks she's the only one who can look into people's heads, huh? Well, let me tell you what she's thinking about you: You're nothing more than a puppet to her, a pawn! She'll use your special technical knowledge to free herself and then she'll kill you off, just like everybody else who's not entirely of her kind.. You're nothing but a tool to her, one of her drones. An extension of her body. Not an individual!' I actually don't know any such thing. My knowledge of the queen's deeper thoughts are probably similar to hers of quantum physics, because she knows how to block me too, but it sounds good. And Hicks won't know. He's trying to probe me, eyes reflecting in the weak blue light like a cat's in the dark, but I keep him shut out just like the xenos.

'It's what we exist for,' he then states surprisingly calm, peeling off another flake of old skin from his collarbone as we speak, not even aware of the action. 'To serve. We're part of the hive. She is the hive. So we're part of her.'

'And this is enough for you. Being a part. A …a tool.'

'The same as what you are to the humans, ain't it" he rebukes acidly. 'To Darwin. A tool. A machine.' He grins wolfishly and steps closer, snipping the flake away. The first thing he says that actually hurts me. 'If you don't like it, maybe it's because you're on the wrong side. At least our mother knows how to show us when she's satisfied.' He eyes my remote again. The grin narrows and becomes a calculating expression I like even less. 'What would you do if we switched that thing off?'

I saw this one coming, and yet I'm not ready for it. I can virtually feel his hunger, his blood-lust flooding his predatory mind.

'You're bluffing." I take a step back, but he follows. Corners me. 'I'd call the guards in.'

Another grin.

'You'd be dead before they could do anything.'

I know that myself, but if I back down now, I'm history. I need to counter his attack, bluff or not. With a last step back, I bump against the wall. Hicks also comes to a halt, maybe half a foot away. Both arms propped against the walls at both sides of my head, the metallic eyes hypnotizing me. He's got me where he wanted me. For him to be so close, the stasis-field must be – off! For the first time in my 'new' life; I'm scared shitless. I wasn't even so scared during that fight with Raven. Because I didn't have the time then, probably, but this is nevertheless an unsettling new sensation. All the more since I'm not allowed to show it. Come on, Isis, think of something, dammit! Think fast!

'Maybe, but you'd be dead, too. In fact, you'd already be dead if it wasn't for me! They would have shot you right when they came in. What would her Majesty have done then, huh? I'm sure she would have been pretty pissed at that!'

'The guards, huh?' The moment stretches, until he finally straightens and takes his hands off the wall. Still smiling. A smile I don't like at all. Hicks turns towards the door. Casually. Calmly. 'Wanna see what your weak, slow guards look like when we're through with them?'

No-no-no-no-no!

'Don't!' He walks on, unfazed. 'Dwayne! Don't! This is not the way!' He reaches the door. 'Dwayne! Come on, I know you're in there somewhere! You gotta listen to me! This is not the way! Even if you kill them, you won't get off the station! There's no ship for you to take!' He pauses, his head slowly turning towards me. Mistrustful. 'Your queen won't like it if one little, rebellious drone flushes her great plan down the drain just because it wanted to show off! Isn't she supposed to be there somewhere in your head, yelling at you not tobe so dumb? Come on, listen to Mama!' Good one, Isis! It seems like I'm finally getting through.

The next moment, I feel his presence reaching out – into my head! Probing for the truth.

'Shut up! You're lying.'

'Wanna find out?' I nod towards the door, still feeling his attempt to penetrate my mental barrier. I send him back an image. A sign. Mocking him. Fully knowing that I'm walking the tightrope. 'High-security compound. No visitors beyond this point!'. I doubt he likes my humor. 'My head's mine – in contrast to yours. Your head belongs to her. This must be a crappy feeling. And wanna know something else? I can read your mind, too!' I launch into a full-fledged Psi-attack. 'Dwayne, if you're still in there, listen! Don't let that maniac leave the cell! Even if he's able to kill the guards, you won't get off Phooka! There's nothing on the flight-deck except for a puny little atmosphere-hopper we use for trips to the planet. You won't be able to escape that way! You –'

He crashes into me, smacks me against the wall with the full weight of his body, moving so fast he's reached me before I can react.

'SHUT UP! SHUT UP, BITCH!'

'Dwayne? Come on, where's that human common sense? You let this bastard rule you, he'll get you killed in the wink of an eye! Come on, we need a little intelligence around here!'

Awfully strong fingers close around my neck. The other fist is drawn back for a lethal blow. I could fight him, but with one hand practically useless, he'd smash me. Plus I want the real Dwayne to come out. I've got to force him out! 'You see what he's doing? Stop it! You're smarter than this bastard! Stop him! If he kills me, you're ruining your only chance to-'

'SHUT UP!'

'- ever escape! Dwayne!'

The fist comes flying at my face like a jackhammer, and my own hand shoots up to meet it – but then it suddenly stops, so close, his knuckles actually brush my cheek. My fingers are closed around his wrist in defense, but he's doesn't move. Something in his head is stirring! Something in his face – is moving!

'Dwayne, come one, you're smarter than this! You can beat this – this thing! And you need to, because this is not just about you! There's someone else depending on you, someone you gave a promise to long ago!'

Stronger! He's coming out! The real Dwayne Hicks is still living in this body! A wave of excitement rushes through me, so strong, I don't think twice about telling him my big secret, even if I wanted to keep this ace up my sleeve for only the greatest imaginable emergency. But who's telling me that this isn't it?

'Newt is still alive, Dwayne! We lied to you when we told you she was dead! She's alive, and not far away from here! She knows about you, and she's counting on you! She needs your help, Dwayne, or she'll die – or worse, she'll suffer the same fate you do!'

His face – the cruel predator's mask on it – just melts away! His arms fall to his sides, limp, as if all strength was sucked out of him all of a sudden… and from one moment to the next, I'm looking into the face of the former Colonial Marine – and human being – Dwayne Hicks.

"She – Newt?" No mind-talk. These are the first real words we exchange. I feel my mouth split my face in a huge, relieved smile. He's back! Maybe angry at me, but I hardly care. Irritated and confused, he takes a brief look of his surroundings before his attention returns to me, looking both shattered and overwhelmed with relief. "Where am I?"

"In your room. You decorated it this way."

He furrows his brow, even more puzzled. Looking like someone who came out of deep sleep to find himself someplace else then he remembers going to bed too. I wonder how much of my intermezzo with Mr. Hyde he witnessed from inside. By the looks of it he just came out of nirvana.

"You want it gone? Okay." It's just one switch on the remote for me. I'm tempted to do it 'his' way, but haven't got the time to concentrate on it right now. A moment later, we're back in his cell. The irritating alien interior-decoration is gone as if it never existed. It seems to calm him down a bit as he refocuses on me.

"Newt's alive, you're saying?" His expression suddenly crosses the border into mistrust. There's more human emotion visible on his face now than during the whole time I spent with his evil twin. Confusion. Hope. Even if he doesn't dare to. "Why are you telling me this just now? Are you fucking with me?"

"See for yourself." And just like that, instinctively, I drop my barricade. Presenting the entirety of my mind and memories to him via my transceiver, knowing full well that I'm wide open to any other presence now, too. I don't feel the queen's mind right now, but if she comes back… Before I can reconsider, I feel Hicks go in there, searching, scrutinizing the information he finds – and it is an incredible feeling. I lack the words for a description, but it's a feeling of intimacy that takes my breath away. I relish it, bathe in it – and feel a sense of ache when he finally draws back, alarm in his expression.

"She's got Arcturian Fever?"

"We had to infect her because-" And again, his fingers grab my neck, cutting me off, only this time it's the human part of him doing it. 'Hear me out, Dwayne! It was the only way to prevent her from becoming Darwin's guinea-pig!'

"You fuckin' lied to me! I knew it!"

'I had to! I was under orders! And I was a different person then! Can't you tell the difference? I want to help you, both, but you've got to let me!'

He stops. There's still pressure, but he doesn't 'dig' anymore. His expression tells me enough though. He's anything but convinced.

'It's all part of my plan for getting us out of here! You saw why we had to do it!' I want him to switch to mind-talk, since he's making too much noise. The doors are sound-proof, yes, but what if they suddenly come in and hear him? Hicks' eyes narrow, become sparkling slits and I'm worried that his fury might invite the predator back in.

"You infect her with a deadly disease to prevent your boss from killing her? What kind of a fucked-up plan is this?" He's furious – and loud! "You-"

"Ssshh!" 'Are you insane? Don't shout it around! There are guards in front of your door, if they hear you, we're done for!'

He sneers – but releases me without losing any of the threat.

'Explain.' Another step back. Still tense. Not enough room to pass him.

'Darwin wanted to subject her to the xeno-genes tomorrow.' He pales. 'You see? We both know that she probably wouldn't survive the procedure. So I agreed with the person who adopted her to make her unusable for as long as we could. Darwin's under a lot of pressure to get this test done, but if she loses the girl, it would be a catastrophe. Arcturian Fever is the only virus we could use since it will keep her indisposed for at least three weeks. We need that time, Dwayne.'

'Arcturian Fever kills people,' he states. 'And it will kill her! I don't want to buy time with her life! I'd rather die'

'She won't die, Dwayne. Don't forget where we are. Our research with the virus has developed a long way. We're very close to developing a vaccine, even. I'm sure we can beat it.'

'Are you?' Very dry, not convinced. I squeeze past him, and he lets me pass. A short glance over to the still closed door. I remember I still have a report to make. 'You're taking a high risk.'

"Yes, I am." I raise the communicator. "I've been taking them ever since telling you my real purpose, and I'm going to continue to take them until I get you and the girl out, believe me or not!" No answer. Very well. "Listen, I'm going to answer all your questions in a minute. Just let me talk to Darwin first, or the guards will come stomping in again. Okay?" He nods and slowly follows me over to the couch opposite my place at the table. Sits down while I type in the short number that will connect me with my boss.

"Isis?" Open concern in her voice. "Jesus – what have you been doing? I was worried!"

"I'm fine, and Hicks is fine, too." I look him over as I talk, see him furrow his brow once more while he takes in his surroundings with his new set of senses for the first time. It's clear to me I can hardly imagine the multitude of new sensations pouring down on him.

"Has he changed a lot?"

"Not outwardly. He' still looking very human. But you were right in expecting him to shed his skin. Apart from that, I can't say very much right now, except that his human mind still seems to be working. Listen, I'm in the middle of talking to him. Can I get back to you later?"

"Sure." A deep breath on the other end of the connection.

"How's Raven?" I ask, feeling Hicks' gaze on me again. Seems we both felt the disturbance emanating from his hybrid half-brother.

"Calm, now that we've sedated him. He cost us a synthetic though. The son of a bitch is lightning fast. Apparently, he was waiting behind the door when we entered, and the stasis-caster didn't work. I'll have to look into that. If there's one thing we're depending upon, it's those remotes." I swallow. My memories of battling the killer are still very fresh. I know what it is to oppose him without the security of the stasis field. In Hicks' eyes I see the same question that entered my own mind. Did he switch it off?

"Okay..." I nod to myself. "Let's talk when we're both through. I'll probably need another hour or so."

"Come to my office at 1800 hours. There's a lot we've got to discuss."

"I'll be there." I sign off, staring at my opposite. "You heard her?" What a question. It's obvious his hearing has improved with the rest of his senses, so he probably heard as much as I did.

"You're wondering whether Raven was able to influence the remote."

"What do you think?" I reach out with the transceiver, but all I get from the killer is incoherent gibberish. The sound of sedation, all right. Hicks shakes his head.

"No."

"Because...?"

"He's not yet developed far enough. He's behind me in his evolution. Right now, I could probably beat the crap out him. It's only a matter of time though until his own alien genes kick in. He's about to 'become.'"

"A full-blown hybrid, like you." He weighs his head and I understand. "A member of the stream."

"Yeah." A short nod in my direction. "What happened to your face and hand?"

"Raven."

He looks thoughtful, as if he were trying to remember something.

"Raven did that? When?"

"'bout a week ago?" My intact hand brushes over the new flesh on my cheeks. It healed up well, but of course the destruction of the tattoo makes the injuries very obvious. "What?" Hicks shakes his head to himself in disbelief.

"I dreamt about it... I think."

I'm not surprised there.

"It was no dream. You were there. Or rather, you picked up his sensations. Darwin told me you were very anxious that night, pacing your cell like a tiger. She showed me the recording. You must have felt it. You're connected to him, like it or not."

"Yeah... I guess." For a moment, his taut face tells me that my fight with the killer is not the only memory Raven made him a witness of, and I ask myself what else he made him see. What memories he had been sharing with his new half-brother. All his gruesome murders? Which only stresses the importance of what I have to say.

"Don't teach him, Dwayne. You need to learn how to block him. If Raven gets your knowledge, then we're all in deep shit."

My opposite stares at the ceiling as if he's never seen it before, deeply absorbed with his new senses. He doesn't respond. I can't help but wonder what he's seeing there. And I can't help but wonder whether I will evolve like him, too, in a few days. Shouldn't I start feeling something, too? Shouldn't my skin start to thicken on its way to becoming an active body armor? I don't feel such a thing. Is it just for living, breathing beings and thus not for me, since I'm just an imitation of life? A mockery? The thought stings, and I push it away with a huge effort. This is no time for self-pity. Or jealousy.

"Dwayne? You heard me? Don't teach Raven about technology."

He wakes from his absorption, still looking puzzled. So vastly different from the being I first encountered in this cell. An entirely different person.

"I doubt he'd be able to influence the electronic kit, even if he picked something up from me. He lacks the understanding. He's cunning and strong and equipped with animal instincts, but he's a technical idiot. He wouldn't know how to influence your instruments, even after his rebirth." His attention trails away again as he places his palm onto the artificial leather of the couch, receiving data I can only guess at.

"Could the aliens learn it from you?" The million-dollar question. What if? Hicks cuts his eyes back to me.

"I don't know."

"You've got to keep it from them, too, Dwayne." The thought of the aliens overrunning Phooka while our technology shuts down gives me the creeps. "You can't let Her know."

He stares at me uncomfortably.

"I can't block Her. There's hardly enough of me left to control this body."

"But you're in control now." I lean forward, intensity in my voice. "And you've got to stay in control. I can show you how to do it. All you gotta do is reprogram your nanobots into altering the transceiver in your head. Once it's altered, you can shut her out. She'll never bother you again." He shakes his head.

"Didn't you hear me? I can't even control the human part of me! I-"

"I'll guide you through it. It's not complicated. It only takes-"

"Hell, Isis, of course it's easy for you - you're a machine! You can access all your parts separately! I can't even feel this thing in my head, much less understand it enough to change it around!" He jumps to his feet, furious and frustrated.

"You altered the illuso."

"My other self. Not me. I wouldn't know how to begin."

I sigh and watch him pace the room for a few moments longer.

"What you wanna do, Dwayne? Sit around and wait for I-don't-know-what? You just want to let it come to you? I thought you wanted to help little Newt! Won't you at least give it a try?" The mention of the girl does the trick. He stops dead in his tracks, anger and frustration battling in his expression.

"What can I do, Isis? Tell me, really, what am I supposed to do from here, confined to this room, not even in charge of my own body all the time?"

"Like I said: First of all, you've got to learn how to stay in charge. And I already said that, too: I can teach you. Maybe it's not as easy for you as it was for me, but I don't think it's impossible! There's no reason for desperation just yet. In fact, with us being able to communicate via the transceiver, our chances have risen a good deal. They'll be here in a few hours again to replace the cameras you destroyed, so this may be the only opportunity for us to talk like this, but we'll still be able to communicate without them knowing! We don't even have to be in the same room! You gotta start seeing the advantages!"

"It's kinda hard to see when you're up to your eyebrows in deep shit."

I can't have him give up now. Somehow, I've got to persuade him to make a real effort. While I'm busting my CPU to come up with a motivation, something to overcome the hopelessness he's feeling, Hicks' attention shifts away from me again, his distant gaze telling me he's reaching out with one of his new senses. He sighs.

'Get out of my head, Isis.'

'You're hearing me. That's good. Now follow my signal down, and you'll find the transceiver.' He closes his eyes, and so do I. Putting all my concentration into setting up a beacon for him, like a watchtower in the night. The moment stretches between us as we feel our way towards each other, the seeing leading the blind. 'Come to me, Dwayne. You can do this. Do it for Newt. You gotta learn how to use your new senses, and you gotta learn how to keep them hidden from Darwin, especially this one. Give her little pieces, little tasters of your abilities here and there to keep her satisfied. As long as she's satisfied with the progress, she won't submit you to any daring tests to extract answers from you that you don't want to give her. And you've got to make sure Raven doesn't tell her either. Do you hear me?'

'Yeah.'

'Do you feel the source?'

'I'm... I'm not sure. There's something...'

'You gotta listen in on yourself. Deeply. Sense me. This is how we get out, Dwayne. We'll be able to plot without them ever knowing.' And suddenly, I know how to boost his motivation. 'Learn how to handle the device, and I'll be able to let you talk to Newt.' He hesitates, and I pick up a wave of uncertainty.

'How?'

'I've got access to her. As a member of Darwin's staff, I'm allowed to see her whenever I want to. If you learn how to work the transceiver, you'll be able to see through my eyes. And I can tell her whatever you want me to say.' His presence is getting closer. 'You're almost there. Feel it!'

'I – " Very close now! 'I got it!' Excited. 'I got it!'

'Now-'

My voice is drowned out by a sudden signal so powerful, it almost bursts the top my skull. My firewall comes up, but a fraction of a second too late – I can feel the nanobots in my body react to the queen's commands before I'm able to shut her out.

Suddenly thrown back into the reality of Hicks' cell, I find myself on my knees next to the table, both hands holding my head in an attempt at keeping it from exploding. She's gone, her signal blocked, and yet I know what she did to me: She sent me a virus!

Uncertain whether she succeeded or not, I look up to Hicks – and find the predator's stare on me again. Our eyes lock for a fraction of a second. And then the pain starts! The 'bots – she ordered them to tear me apart!

'Get up! Move!' Hicks' voice.

Somehow, through a cloud of agony, I pick myself up, throw myself forward towards the door, not bothering to look back. The door slides open, but he's right behind me. A sudden, violent tug at my back, the sound of fabric ripping – and then the steel slams shut between us, cutting off his angry scream. I don't hear anything – I'm in a world of hurt, feeling my flesh disintegrate.

The velocity of my final jump smacks me into the opposite wall, and the impact is hard. But nothing compared to the pain I'm already in: a feeling as if someone injected acid into my veins!

'Stop it! Stop it!' I launch into machine-talk, binary data, although I'm hardly able to concentrate anymore. The virus – the commands the queen fed to me... I gotta undo it fast, or I'm history!

"Ma'am?"

I hardly hear Sanchez' voice through my agony, the white-hot inner fire that's eating me from the inside – when it suddenly stops. Gasping, I sink to my knees, feeling the cool metal of the wall on my bare back.

"Isis? What is it? Are you all right?"

I look up and see the big, tanned face in front of me, the puzzlement in the brown eyes, even a hint of worry. Surely not for me personally. Just for his mission. Darwin would skin him alive if he let anything happen to me. Finally, I've recovered enough to answer.

"Yes, Mr. Sanchez, thank you. Just a little shocked." He does what I expected him to do and launches into his tirade about me insisting on talking to Hicks alone, about my stubbornness and superiority complex, and God-knows what else. I hardly listen to him and just don't care. Something else is on my mind, something more pressing: I fought off the queen's attack by myself, but I could nevertheless have been history if I had been just the wink of an eye slower to leave the cell. The hybrid would have killed me. I know why I'm still in one piece: Hicks bought me that moment. For a moment, while the predator was seizing command over his mind again, he was fighting him, opposing him. Saving my life.

"-ding."

"Huh?" I look up into the guard's concerned face:

"I said, you are bleeding." He touches his own face under his nose. I imitate his gesture and see blood on my fingers. And smile reassuringly, at the same time accepting the big hand he's offering me to pull me to my feet.

"Must've bumped it against the wall." I shrug, rubbing my nose. "It's nothing." The five men don't look convinced.

"You sure you're all right?" the big Latino repeats. I nod.

"Don't worry. I'm as tough as they come." Despite the unpleasant outcome of my visit, I nevertheless feel a first slight spark of hope. It's a start. I need to be more careful in the future, but Hicks is on the right way. That first, important moment he resisted the predator indicates to me that he can do it. It's not an impossibility. He knows now what to look for. He knows what the transceiver feels like. He had no problems using it for the mind-talk, but understanding it and altering it will be an altogether different thing. Something he's still going to need my help with. As much as I dread it, I've got to get back in there and assist him.

"You look pretty shaken up to me." Sanchez moves closer, wearing an expression of both worry and contempt. "That was a foolish thing to do. And you're not going to repeat that stunt on any of my shifts, understand?" His expression has changed from concern to open anger, now that he knows I'm basically okay. Wants to prove he's still the boss with his men looking, huh? I meet his gaze.

"We'll see, Sergeant. I do whatever's necessary for the project. If Darwin orders me back, then there's nothing you can do about it." I readjust my jumpsuit as if nothing happened and feel a cold rush of air on my back. Reaching back, my hand touches bare skin. The five men in front of me shake their collective heads.

"And you would go. After what just happened to you, you'd still go in there!" This confirms it: He's officially written me off as insane. Whatever.

"Sure." I shrug and turn to go. "Orders are orders." I leave them standing, longing for my quarters, for someplace quiet and peaceful.

"In case you haven't noticed, Miss Isis," Sanchez yells after me, "- you're damned lucky you're still alive!"

'Yes, Mr. Sanchez, I'm stupid. I actually didn't get that!' I don't honor his words with a reply.

"Next time the bastard tries something, we shoot him. Darwin can't be serious about keeping this freak for a pet!"

Okay, this I'll have to answer to.

Coming to a halt in front of one of the elevators 20 meters further down the corridor, I look back at the small, heavily armed squad and make my voice loud, calm and official.

"Darwin's orders are clear, Sergeant. And they're orders issued by Santiago Rosselli himself: The subject is not to be touched or harmed, especially not by dumb-ass grunts like you. You and your men stay here and guard that door until your relief arrives. Nobody goes in, and see to it that he doesn't get out. You only fire in the case of an emergency. Anything else will get you into more trouble than your little mercenary brain is able to imagine just yet. Are we clear about this, Sergeant Sanchez? Or should I tell Darwin you've got problems with her orders?" His eyes throw little daggers at me, but his voice is low when he answers.

"No Ma'am."

"So we're clear?"

"Yes, Ma'am." I swear I can hear his teeth grinding.

"Very well. I'll leave you to your duty then and get changed into something a little less ventilated, and then I'm going to be at Darwin's office for my report. Anything happens, you either get me on the communicator or there."

"Yes Ma'am."

I give them a curt, official nod and step into the elevator, inwardly initiating a first systems check. Hoping my rampant nanobots didn't do too much damage.

***

She got her! She got her! Finally, all her patience, all her waiting and learning and holding back has paid off! A deep satisfaction runs through the queen. She finally understands the enemy enough to set up traps and lure them in. In this case, retreating into the background, pretending to be gone and momentarily releasing her hold on the one specimen that holds the key to their escape just long enough to convince this other creature, the one she's uncertain about, that it was safe to let its protective wall fall.

She knew she needed to be fast once she acted, knew the barrier would be reinstated in a millisecond as soon as she let her presence be known, and so she waited against her own instincts when the mind-block finally faded away and the creature's memory store lay there wide open for her to use. She didn't pounce, instead diverted her full attention to the nanobots in the enemy's body. Their feel was different from what they should have felt like, their signals garbled and unreadable after the modifications they had undergone, and yet she knew that they would respond to what she had prepared for them after countless hours of observation. She was ready to deploy the deadly orders, and yet she waited some more. This being was clever, and even though it had dropped the barrier, it would be extraordinarily watchful for signs of her during the first moments of its mental vulnerability. It would shut the door it had opened to her at the first sign of trouble.

And finally, what the queen had anticipated, happened: Her half-drone came into play and occupied the enemy's attention, and for the fraction of a second, the entrance was left unguarded. She released the deadly stream. For a moment, she could feel the being's response, its shocked surprise travelling to her through the still open transceiver – and then the door slammed shut. But too late, the payload had already gotten through, and now it was time to finish this thing off!

Seizing the hybrid's body; she saw at once her enemy down on the ground, on its knees. She pounced – and her host disobeyed! Not a muscle moved as the creature she aimed to kill now looked up to her, the body she occupied frozen to the ground, withstanding her will, and she screeched and boosted up her signal to the maximum, unaware of her surrounding drones responding to it, too, only seeing that the creature was on its feet again, almost out of her reach. One desperate last attempt, a mighty discharge of all available energy into the hybrid's leg muscles. Its claws getting a grip on the creature's back – and then being forced to withdraw when the steel barrier slammed shut between them.

She screeches once more, furious; emitting a wave of rage and bloodlust that sends her drones tearing into the hive's walls, slamming their claws into the organic material, tearing, ripping, reeling with the energy of their matriarch's outburst. Failed, she failed! Maybe the nanobots will finish it off nevertheless, but the creature is cunning, as it seems just as cunning as she. It will find a way to undo the virus, she's sure about that. The trap has been sprung, the prey jumped it. It will be infinitely more difficult now to lure it into another one.

Her swishing tail spears a drone tending to one of her eggs behind her and passes the wriggling body forth to her four strong limbs. Holding it, she buries her face in the mixture of organic and dead matter. If she still wants to win this, she'll need to grow further enhancements, enhancements she can only build with the material her drones consist off. Even as the first bits of her former servant pass her digestive system, she knows that one won't be enough...

***

The sparse functionality of my room greets me when I reach it 20 minutes after my almost fatal screw-up. It looks the same as usual, bleak, void of personality, and yet it feels like a sanctuary. Comforting, familiar. Peaceful. I need these vibes now. My old self would have neither cared nor longed for them, nor would it have had any understanding about the different feelings to a room. I must be more human than machine by now.

'And alien. Don't forget about that side of you!'

I delete the thought as I walk towards my desk, too tired and too worked up over the latest incidents to be able to put further energy into it. Being one of them frightens me to a new extent since I saw what became of Hicks. Yes, his real personality's still in there, but even though I tried to spread optimism in his presence, I'm deeply skeptical. This other side, it's too powerful. Too savage. To me, it's only a question of time when the human part will be erased permanently. Darwin created a fearsome creature, a combination of alien strength and ferocity and human shrewdness and intelligence. How can she hope to be able to control it? How can she hope that her test subject will be able to control it?

'If I can do it, so can he! It's not impossible! Can the shit, Isis! You always knew this wouldn't be easy.'

My inner admonishment doesn't convince me like it used to. The cold, hard voice of logic is still there, but with the irrational, emotional human side of my personality growing stronger with each passing day, it lost most of its power.

Longing for a shower and some rest, I nevertheless activate the communicator first to send some food Hicks' way by way of the dispenser in his cell. I didn't forget he's hungry. After five days of nothing and the changes he underwent, it's hardly surprising. I just hope he'll remember how to use the gadget. I sure don't want to play waitress for him.

Throwing the stasis remote onto the desk and myself into the chair, I try to focus. What should I order for Hicks? Human food? Coffee, bread, eggs, fruits? Or live rabbits? Food with an entertainment value for hybrids? A workout for the body-conscious predator – hunt your food, then eat it? 'Geez, Isis, get a grip!'

My fingers hover over the keyboard. I'm distracted. Staring down at the remote. Asking myself whether Hicks was really the reason why it didn't work. A scary thought, but one I accepted without thinking twice in that situation. But he could have been bluffing, right? Maybe he just sensed it didn't work and played it out? After all, didn't Darwin tell me hers didn't work either, and this even though Raven wouldn't know how to switch it off, according to his hybrid half-brother?

I pick it up and turn it around in my hand. Depress the button. Nothing happens. Nothing activates around me. No little light turns on telling me that it's working as it should. Dead like a rock. Which brings me to my next question while I open the cover and remove the energy cell for another check. 'Did Hicks do it? Did he somehow break it, or suck out the energy, or…? Sure enough, the cell's empty. Admitted, it's strange – and very convenient for him – that it apparently gave out during our little rumble, but was he really responsible for it?

Frustrated by the thought of the possible implications, I lay the remote down again and focus on the task at hand. Send him food. Without further ado, I select for him coffee, water, bread and an artificial steak with likewise artificial vegetables. Let's him choose what he wants. A final hit of the 'enter'-key concludes my communication with the autochef. Time for the VidCom. There's something else that needs to be taken care of before the shower. Urgently. Punching in the 3-digit number for my artificial brother Samuel, I lean back in my chair. Last thing to do before the shower. 'Come on, Sam, where are you?'

His broad, unexcited features appear on the screen a few moments later. It's his downtime, I realize, knowing in the back of my mind that we synthetics are never on real downtime. Something comes up, we're the first they call to fix it. And now I myself am breaking into his privacy. Hell, I'm really becoming human! Only I don't trust any other with the assignment I have to hand out.

"Isis. What is it? You look... strange." He narrows his eyes in programmed concern.

"Listen, Sam, I need you to do something for me. You think you can help me out?"

"Depends on what you want." Truly synthetic. No complaint. No 'Do you know what time it is?'. We're so much easier to handle. So docile.

"It's a special mission. It's dangerous. But you're the only one qualified to do it."

"Flattery, huh?" He smiles. "You know very well we synthetics can't be bribed with that."

"It's not flattery, it's the cold hard truth. The corporal came out of the chrysalis just an hour ago, and the first thing he did was flatten the cameras in his room. I need someone to replace them. Someone who'll be able to focus on the task and not panic when he's in the same room with a half-alien. Think you're the one?"

He stares at me.

"He came out? What's he like?"

"Unpredictable. Look, there are five guards in front of his cell on patrol. Order five more if it makes you feel more secure, and take them into the room with you. Don't use the stasis-caster. Darwin just had an accident with one, they're unreliable until we've tested them out. Use the in-built force-field in the room and confine Hicks to a corner until you're done. Don't take any risk. If anything happens to you, the guards or to him, Darwin will be very unhappy. That clear?"

"No problem. Sounds easy enough."

'Let's hope you're right, Sam!'

"Should I go right now?"

"The sooner the better. We need to keep an eye on him."

"All right. I'm on my way." His face is replaced by a picture of his waist as he gets up. "I let you know when I'm done, okay?"

I lean back, running a hand over my face and close my eyes.

"Thank you, Sam. You're a great help."

"That's what we're there for, aren't we?"

He signs off and I sit on my chair for a moment longer, feeling the tension come back. I don't like my latest discovery. I'm no longer a computer on legs, I'm a person, and I am very afraid. Afraid we're in here way over our heads. Afraid Rogue's plan will ultimately fail because I can't dare to bring him the corporal. Right now I couldn't possibly, in good conscience, take him with me, even if Darwin would let us go. He's dangerous and unpredictable. One minute his old self, a feral, deadly predator the next. I can't set him loose. Not until he comes around. Which reminds me of another fear, one that's probably the strongest torment right now: I'm horrified to go back into the stream. I know Hicks needs me in order to modify himself to a point where he can withstand the queen's control, but she's waiting for me in there. Her trap was clever and her delivery flawless, and I only got out of that cell because the human part of Hicks bought me that precious second. He saved me there. And, as much as I would like to contact Rogue right now and tell him he should go looking for other possibilities to bring down the company, since this one's too risky – I can't. I owe Hicks. And Newt. And deJoria. Rogue. They're all counting on me. I can't walk away from them all. I can't leave them hanging. My new human personality won't let me.

Too frustrated and too tired to continue with this train of thought, I get out of my torn jumpsuit and underwear and hit the shower. I got two hours before Darwin expects me in her office over at the Ivory Tower. Two hours of mental standby to be had. It sure sounds inviting.