5
The sound of laughter hardly seemed to fit the overcast day. Rika mostly ignored it, just getting ready to absorb herself in all the necessary tasks needed to make it in this horrible school. Satoko's laughter and smiles had often put her in a good mood before, but right then, that wasn't the case. No, she didn't join the group at lunch. Her needs wouldn't be met with them, her true desires would be teased, so she just stayed alone. Briefly writing in her notebook with the flashy blue pen was her only solace.
The same routine was repeated, day after day, until one afternoon, Satoko's voice. "Oh, Furude-san!" she called. Though Rika pretended not to hear, footsteps followed. A hand even touched her shoulder, and Rika glanced toward the source to see Satoko's smile. The contact was so desired, filling in a withdrawal and soothing a dull ache that had previously been surrendered to as a new reality.
Though just for a moment. Satoko's words combined with the glances of others soon showed that this reality wasn't much different than feared. "I found that book you lent me! Do you want it back?" Satoko continued speaking before a response was given. "Oh, right! And we did start our Trash Reading Club - not an official club, no regular meeting times either. Do you want to join anyway?" The loud talking of the two other girls near the entrance cut off any response Rika might have given. "Why don't you come now?" Satoko suggested. "You may not have read what we did, but maybe you'll decide something's interesting from our conversation. Or know something to avoid!"
Embarrassingly enough, simply the tap of Satoko's hand was enough to lure to the undesired meeting. Sitting down in the lobby of the dormitory, the only solace was that at least there was no expectation for one who hadn't read their books to join in the conversation. Listening was enough of a chore as they discussed several books that indeed seemed best to avoid. Then Satoko brought up a topic that raised Rika's heartbeat.
"Right! Does anyone know any more novels with love between women?"
Rika's face flushed as another girl laughed. "Are you that interested in that kind of thing, Satoko?" the classmate asked.
"Who knows," Satoko said. "More must exist, because some are very interested in that kind of thing."
Rika stared down, despite knowing she shouldn't. Anyone who wanted to mock her should be stared in the eyes.
"Are you interested in girls in general?" The playful questioning continued.
"I don't know... It seems kind of weird," Satoko said.
"Right?" the girl said as they all laughed.
"Of course," Satoko continued with a smile. "So does the idea of being interested in boys. It's the same. Love in general is awkward, isn't it?"
Satoko seemed to look toward Rika as she spoke. Rika still didn't join in their chat. Finally, the conversation was over. Back in her own dormitory, Satoko came by. "Here's the book you leant me!" she declared as she invited herself in and placed it on Rika's desk. Rika gave a polite nod before turning back to her studies. "Right!" Satoko continued without leaving. "Have you improved the story I read before?"
Rika sighed. Apparently, one side of her was unable to hold back from a response. "There's no improving it," she declared.
"Do you really think it's that hopeless?" Satoko asked, raising her eyebrow before giving a worried-looking blink. "No confidence in your skills?"
"That chapter is complete. There's no modifying it," Rika declared before standing up, grabbing several other notebooks and carelessly plopping them onto her desk, naming the contents as they clattered in a pile. "After the Onikakushi Chapter, there's the Watanagashi Chapter, Curse Killing Chapter, Time Killing Chapter..."
"Ah!" Rika paused at Satoko's exclamation, seeing the other girl's eyes light up. "You mean that was just the first chapter? A long chapter, but I'm interested! I wonder what happens to other characters after Keiichi-san and the others die, especially if he's not the culprit. Thanks very much, I'll just take these..."
The look of what seemed genuine glee on Satoko's face was enough of a spell to prevent any sort of defense against her taking the created records of previous fragments. Though emotionally wanting it to be, the reaction wasn't at all taken as a warm, inclusive gesture. Would these records to be used in further exemplifying how 'interesting' Rika was, further ostracize her, show her that this wasn't the world she wanted to be in? Even thinking this, the momentary burst of positive emotion from Satoko's reaction bringing Rika up from her own lackadaisical baseline was enough that she didn't do anything.
The 'trash' unofficial club turned out to be appealing after all. The brief sporadic 'meetings' brought something unexpected to some days. The books they passed around brought a nice break from their studies. Though there was nothing like the one Satoko had first given, being able to chat about them with others made them more enjoyable, even if lacking otherwise. Rika was able to comment even with the company of usually herself, Satoko, and two others. They even seemed to tolerate her for those brief meetings.
"Oh! And what did you all think of my pick?" Satoko asked after they'd discussed a fantasy story.
Rika had nothing to say about the trashy romance, but the other two gushed about how much they'd liked it.
"I know, I know," Satoko continued. "That's just the kind of romance I like! They're drawn together as soulmates, and not willing to give each other up! They mean the most to each other of anyone, even when other things tear them apart. Then when she rejects him because of her family, and she won't let him go, it's so exciting! After going through all that, I was happy for them at the end."
"What's wrong with a romance where they're allowed to love each other without worry?" Rika asked.
"Come on, Furude-san!" Satoko chided, though her grin widened in amusement as she ruffled Rika's hair. "Nothing's wrong with that in the real world, of course, but it just doesn't make a good story."
Rika said nothing else, though thinking she certainly enjoyed such uncomplicated stories. Maybe Satoko's preferred 'exciting' romances could be engaging as well, but the one they'd all read seemed too contrived. Rika had to roll her eyes. What made the two main characters love each other so much, anyway? They'd barely known each other, then just suddenly broken apart everything else in their lives to be together. Such things didn't happen in the real world, did they?
The rest of their discussions were brief, and the other girls soon left. "Oh, right, wait, Furude-san," Satoko said as the others stood up. Rika turned to her on the small chair, blushing as she realized how close they were. Satoko just continued speaking upon realizing she had Rika's attention. "I started your 'second chapter'. You were just teasing me before, weren't you? I see you decided to re-write it after all! And the plot is so different this time. It seems like a different story, really. Maybe it's better. Mion-san is really cute!"
Rika remained silent. Right, cute. Such a response was typical of one who didn't know much about that fragment, or the repeating events in general. And of course, Mion, who was Shion in the current world, really could be rather cute.
"Well, I'll have to look at it more when I can. By the way, did you hear about the tea?" Satoko asked.
"Yeah," Rika confirmed quietly. There was a high tea event that some of the upperclassmen were planning. The idea had seemed appealing, and she was thinking of going, but not sure if she'd be able to work up the nerve.
"Would you like to go with me?" Satoko asked.
Go with her? The wording almost made it sound like a date or other romantic excursion of sorts. Of course, Rika wouldn't be so naïve as to misconstrue. Even if it wasn't some kind of trick, she'd show up with her other friends there, of course, and no sort of intimate time for the two of them. Back before Rika had made it to this world, there had been nothing like that either. They'd just always been together, with friends or without. The idea of having to make a scheduled time for herself and Satoko rather than their time together being a given was unappealing.
Even so, maybe the asked question should get a response. "Fine," Rika agreed to the invitation. Satoko appeared pleased at her accepting it, and continued with some small talk about their plans. Even if not some kind of terrible trap, the event seemed a poor substitute for what Rika had before. At least it was a way to pass the time.
"Furude-san, you're just wearing your uniform?"
Even confronted about her own state, Rika could only stare at Satoko's ruffled dress as they stood in the entrance of their dormitory. "We're still at school," she said.
"You have to have something else, don't you?" Satoko asked, then grabbing her by the arm. "Or don't you? I can - Wait, what I have might not fit you at all. Let's go see what you have!"
Satoko led her back to her own dormitory, ignoring the studying roommate's confused reaction. After going through the closet, Satoko pulled out a black and white frilly dress with a blue bow, raising an eyebrow. "I guess this will do," she said. "Let's put it on you," she said, grabbing onto Rika's collar.
"Ah-" Rika's face flushed, momentarily frozen.
Satoko paused, given Rika's reaction along with the stares of the curious roommate, then giggled. "Silly me! Of course, you can dress yourself! I'll wait for you up front."
Rika took her time, and eventually joined Satoko. "Let's go," Satoko said. She frowned as Rika looked around. "Did you forget something?"
"You're not waiting for anyone else?" Rika asked.
"Huh?" Satoko raised her eyebrows. "Maybe we'll see the other members there, but I asked you specifically, didn't I?"
Indeed, she had. Without pause for anyone else, they went to the event room. After politely greeting everyone, they engaged in quiet conversation as the tea was served, along with cucumber sandwiches and a variety of treats. Rika and Satoko both were fairly quiet. At the end, they were specifically asked for help by the upperclassmen, and agreed. As they cleaned, their hosts left.
"Hm." Satoko frowned once they were finished, resting her hand on the table as they finished cleaning. "The food was good, but the people were rude. Why should we be the ones to tidy up if we're supposed to be the guests?"
Rika smiled as she sat on the nearby couch. It had seemed a bit rude to have them clean up, but the event had been a nice diversion from the usual. She'd enjoyed sitting next to Satoko, and seeing Satoko's reaction right there was nostalgic as well. Rika closed her eyes and sighed at the good feeling such a sight brought back.
"Ah-" Rika couldn't help but exclaim upon feeling the vibration of Satoko sitting next to her. The other girl soon wrapped her arm around Rika. "Satoko..." she exclaimed.
"Did you have fun anyway?" Satoko asked.
"Yeah," Rika quietly confirmed.
"Good," Satoko confirmed. "I really do think you're an interesting person," she said with a laugh.
'Interesting' didn't always have positive connotations, though Satoko's amused demeanor implied in this case it did. Even knowing this may be the other girl's way of making fun of her, Rika felt a sense of peace as they sat so closely, no one else around.
"Furude-san," Satoko called after a few moments, breaking Rika's quiet moment.
"Hm?" Rika looked up, broken out of her trance by how Satoko referred to her.
"Were you really serious about liking girls - Well, more specifically, liking me? Or were you just teasing me again?"
Rika's brow furrowed as she heard the question. A similar question may be asked of Satoko, had this human Rika the nerve to do so. Instead, Satoko was the brave one with enough courage to ask it, if the question was genuine. "A crush on Satoko... I'm not sure when it started," Rika decided to say, clenching her fist. For some reason, her heart felt lighter at being able to talk about this. "My feelings have existed for so long."
"Am I someone's first love?" Satoko laughed at the idea. "Even as I was, was I Furude-san's first crush, all the way back then?" Satoko swept Rika's hair back from her face as she spoke.
Rika blushed as she took in the closeness and attention, even with how off this situation was from the ideal left behind. Maybe inspired by Satoko's own brave question, Rika asked one of her own. "Can you not call me that?"
"You mean 'Furude-san'?" Satoko questioned.
Rika gave a barely audible affirmation. It was better than the mocking 'Rika-chama' this Satoko used to refer to her as, but still seemed so distant.
"Right... You always call me 'Satoko', don't you?" Satoko realized. "You were always like that from what I remember though." Before Rika could assume her request was refused, Satoko spoke again. "Alright then... I suppose we know each other well enough, Rika-san."
Rika's head turned toward Satoko in surprise. No, it hadn't been how the true Satoko had referred to her without pretense. But even so, hearing 'Rika-san' from this Satoko's mouth had her heart beating quickly.
"Hey!" Satoko laughed again as she leaned from Rika, their faces having been right in front of each other. Rika leaned over toward her again before smiling and turning away upon seeing Satoko's surprised expression. "You really are teasing me, aren't you?" Satoko giggled. "I can't say I don't hate it. Thanks for coming with me, Fu- Rika-san."
"Thank you as well, Satoko." The moments sitting nearby Satoko were enjoyed thoroughly before the other girl got up. They double checked everything was done before heading back toward the dormitory. Rika thought of grabbing the other girl's hand, but didn't quite have that much nerve. Even if the depression might return later, Rika decided just to enjoy the few moments of illusory connection she'd just experienced.