Jennie's POV

I am hot, too hot. I try to pull the covers off me, but they won't budge. When my eyes open, the night before comes flooding into my mind: Lisa screaming at me in the yard, the scotch on her breath, the broken glass in the kitchen, Lisa kissing me, Lisa moaning as I touched her, her wet boxers. I try to lift myself, but she's too heavy, her head lying across my chest and her arm wrapped around my waist, her body cloaking mine. I'm surprised we ended up like this; she must have moved this way in her sleep. I do admit, I don't want to leave this bed, leave Lisa, but I have to. I have to get back to my room. Kai is there. Kai. Kai.

I gently push Lisa off by her shoulder, rolling her onto her back.

Then she rolls onto her stomach and groans but doesn't wake.

I hurry to my feet and grab my scattered clothes off the floor. Being the coward that I am, I want to be out of here by the time she wakes. Not that she'll mind; at least she won't have to invest her energy in hurting me on purpose if I leave on my own. This way is better for both of us. Regardless of how we laughed together last night, nothing is the same in the light of day. Lisa will remember how we got along pretty well last night and then will feel the need to be extra hateful to make up for it. It's what she does, and I will not be around this time. For a second last night, the thought had crossed my mind that maybe our night together would change her mind, make her want to have more with me. But I know better, really.

I fold her T-shirt neatly on the dresser and zip my skirt up. My shirt is wrinkled from lying on the floor last night, but that's really the least of my worries at the moment. I slip my feet into my shoes and as I grab hold of the door handle, I think, One more look back won't hurt.

I look back to the sleeping Lisa. Her messy hair is sprawled onto the pillow, and her arm is now draped over the side of the bed. She looks so peaceful, so beautiful despite the pieces of metal in her face.

I turn back around and turn the door handle. "Jen?"

My heart drops. I slowly turn back around to Lisa, expecting to see her harsh green eyes glaring at me. But instead, they are closed; a frown is set on her face, but she is still asleep. I can't decide if I'm relieved that she is asleep, or somber that she called out my name. Is that what she did, or am I hearing things now?

I jump out of the room and gently close the door behind me. I have no idea how to get out of this house. I walk straight down the hall and I am relieved to find the stairs easily. I pad down the stairs and nearly collide with Jisoo. My pulse quickens as I try to think of something to say. Her eyes scan my face and she stays silent, waiting for an explanation, I assume.

"Jisoo . . . I . . ." I have no idea what to say.

"Are you okay?" she asks with concern.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I know you must think—"

"I don't think anything. I really do appreciate you coming. I know you don't like Lisa, and it means a lot to me that you would come here to help get her in control."

Oh. She is so nice, too nice. I almost want her to tell me how disgusted she is that I stayed the night with Lisa, that I left my boyfriend alone in my room all night after I took his car and ran to Lisa's rescue, just so I feel as bad as I should.

"So are you and Lisa friends again?" she asks, and I shrug.

"I have no idea what we are. I have no idea what I'm doing. She just . . . she . . ." I break into sobs. Jisoo wraps her arms around me in a warm and comforting hug.

"It's okay. I know she can be so terrible," Jisoo says softly. Wait . . . she must think that I'm crying because Lisa did something terrible to me. She would probably never assume that I'm crying because of my feelings for Lisa.

I need to get out of here before I ruin Jisoo's good opinion of me and before Lisa wakes up. "I have to go. Kai is waiting," I say, and Jisoo gives me a sympathetic smile before saying goodbye.

I get into Kai's car and drive back to my dorm as fast as I can, crying most of the way there. How will I explain this all to Kai? I know I have to—I can't lie to him. I just can't imagine how much this will hurt him.

I'm a terrible person for doing this to him. Why couldn't I just stay away from Lisa?

I've calmed myself as much as I can before I pull into the student lot. I walk as slow as I can, unsure how I'm going to face Kai.

When I open the door to our room, I find Kai lying back on my small bed, staring at the ceiling. He jumps up when he sees me come in.

"Jesus, Jennie! Where have you been all night? I've been calling you nonstop!" he shouts. This is the first time Kai has ever actually raised his voice at me. We've bickered before, but this is a little scary to see.

"I am so, so sorry, Kai. I went to Jisoo's house because Lisa was drunk and she was breaking things, and the time just got lost, I guess, so by the time we cleaned up, it was really late and my phone was dead," I lie.

I can't believe I'm lying straight to his face—all the times he has been there for me, and here I am lying to him. I know I should tell him but I can't imagine hurting him.

"Why didn't you use someone else's phone?" he says forcefully, but then pauses. "Never mind—Lisa was breaking stuff? Are you okay? Why did you stay there if she was being violent?"

I feel like he is asking me a thousand questions at once, disorienting me.

"She wasn't being violent; she was just drunk. She wouldn't hurt me," I say and cover my mouth, desperately wishing I could push those last words back in.

"What do you mean she wouldn't hurt you? You don't even know her, Jennie" he snaps and takes a step toward me.

"I'm just saying that she wouldn't hurt me like physically. I know her well enough to know that. I was just trying to help Jisoo, who was there, too," I say back.

But Lisa would hurt me, emotionally—she already has, and I'm sure she will try again. And here I am defending her.

"I thought you were going to stop hanging around those type of people? Didn't you promise me and your mom that you would? Jennie they aren't good for you. You've started drinking and staying out all night, and you left me here all night—I don't know why you even had me come here if you were just going to leave." He sits down on the bed and rests his head on his hands.

"They aren't bad people; you don't know them. When did you become so judgmental?" I ask him. I should be begging for him to forgive me for how badly I've treated him, but I can't help but be irritated by the way he's talking about my friends.

Mostly Lisa, my subconscious reminds me, and I want to slap her.

"I am not judgmental, but you would have never hung out with those Goth people before."

"What? They aren't Gothic, Kai, they're just themselves," I say. I am as surprised by the defiance in my words as Kai is.

"Well, I don't like you hanging out with them—they're changing you. You aren't the same Jennie that I fell in love with." I realize then that his tone hasn't been malicious at all. It's just sad.

"Well, Kai—" I begin, and the door flies open. My eyes follow Kai's to an angry Lisa storming into the room.

I look at Lisa, then at Kai, and back to Lisa. There is no way this is going to go well.