Jennie's POV
I rush out the back door and see Lisa pacing back and forth on the deck. I'm not sure what I can do to help the situation, but I know I would rather be out here with Lisa than face her family in the dining room after that outburst. I feel responsible for this whole thing anyway, since I agreed to come here when Lisa didn't want to. If she started suddenly hanging out with my mother, I know I would feel weird about it.
Ha, like she would ever let that happen, my subconscious points out.
As if she heard my thoughts, Lisa shoots me an annoyed look. When I approach her she turns away from me.
"Lisa . . ."
"No, Jennie, don't," she says sharply. "I know you're going to say that I need to go back in there and apologize to them. But there is no way in hell that is happening, so don't waste your breath! Why don't you just go back in there and enjoy your dinner and leave me the hell alone."
I take a step closer, but all I can manage to say is "I don't want to go back in there."
"Why not? You fit in perfectly with their prudish and boring personalities."
Ouch! Why am I here again? Oh, yeah, that's right: to be Lisa's punching bag.
"You know what? Fine! I will leave—I don't know why I just can't stop trying with you!" I shout, but hope they can't hear me inside.
"Because you just can't take a hint, I guess." As the words leave her mouth, I feel the lump growing in my throat.
"The hint is well-taken." I stare at the stone patio and try to swallow the sting from her words, but it's impossible. When I look up at Lisa, her cold eyes meet mine.
"That's it? That's your defense?" She laughs and rakes her hands through her hair.
"You don't deserve any more of my time. You don't deserve for me to even speak to you, or those nice people in there to spend their time setting up this dinner to have you ruin it! That's what you do: ruin things, everything! And I am done being one of those things." My tears soak my face as Lisa steps toward me. I back away, my feet tripping on something. Lisa reaches out to steady me, but I grab hold of a patio chair instead. I don't want or need her help.
Looking up, I see that her expression is one of exhaustion. Her voice is, too, when she says softly, "You're right."
"I know I am." I turn away from her.
Faster than I could have imagined, she snakes her fingers around my wrist and pulls me to her chest. I lean into her without hesitation, wanting to touch her so badly. But I know better: I can hear the warning in the thump of my heart, rapid beneath my chest. I wonder if Lisa can hear it, too, or feel the pounding of my pulse under her grip. Her eyes are full of anger and I know mine mirror her.
I have no warning before she crashes her lips down on mine, the force of her mouth almost painful. Her action is so full of desperation and hunger that I am lost. Lost in Lisa. Lost in the salty taste of my tears on both our lips, lost in her fingers threaded through my hair. Her hands move from my head to my waist and she lifts me onto the railing. My legs part for her and she moves between them, never losing contact with my mouth. We are all heat and gasps, tangled in each other. My teeth graze over her bottom lip, causing her to groan and pull me even closer.
The back door creaks open, breaking the spell. Turning to look, I am horrified as Jisoo's soft eyes meet mine. Her face is red, and her eyes wide. I push Lisa away from me and jump down from the rail, adjusting my dress as my feet hit the deck.
"Jisoo , I . . ." I begin.
She holds up her hand to silence me and steps toward us. Lisa's breathing is so loud that I swear it echoes between the house and the trees. Her cheeks are flamed, her eyes wild.
"I don't understand. I thought you guys hated each other, and here you are . . . You have a boyfriend, Jennie, I didn't think you were like that." Jisoo's words are harsh but her tone is soft.
"I'm not . . . I don't know what this is." I motion between me and Lisa. Lisa stays silent, for which I am glad. "Kai knows, well, about before. I was going to tell you, I just don't want you to think differently of me," I say, almost apologetically.
"I don't know what to think . . ." Jisoo says and walks back toward the door.
Then, like something out of a movie, a clash of thunder rolls through the air.
"It looks like it might storm," Lisa says, her eyes scanning the darkening sky. Despite her flushed appearance, her voice is calm.
"A storm? Jisoo just caught us . . . kissing," I say, feeling the fire slowly burning out between us.
"She'll be okay."
I look up at her, expecting to see a smug expression, but it's not there.
She puts her hand on my back and rubs gently.
"Do you want to go back inside or do you want me to take you home?" she asks.
It's astounding how abruptly her mood can change from angry to lustful to calm.
"I would like to go back inside and finish dinner. What do you want to do?"
"I suppose we can go back in; the food is pretty good," she says, smiling, and I giggle. "That's a lovely sound," she tells me and I meet her gaze.
"You're in a much better mood," I say and she smiles again.
She rubs the back of her neck like she always does. "I don't understand it, either."
So she is just as confused as I am? I wish my feelings for her weren't so strong; then I could deal with her much better. When she says things like this it makes me care for her that much more. I only wish she could feel the same, but I have been warned by Wendy and Lisa herself that it will never happen.
Thunder rolls again and Lisa takes my hand. "Let's go inside before it rains."
I nod and she leads me inside. She doesn't remove her hand from mine as we walk back into the dining room. Jisoo's eyes dart down to note this, but she says nothing. As much as I don't want Jisoo to see it, I love the way Lisa's hand feels over mine. I love it too much to pull away. Jisoo focuses back on her plate as we retake our seats. Letting go of my hand, Lisa looks up at her father and Karen.
"I am sorry for yelling at you that way," she mutters.
The surprise on everyone's face is evident and Lisa looks down at the table. "I hope I didn't ruin the dinner that you put so much effort into," she continues.
I can't help myself. I reach under the table and put my hand over Lisa's, giving it a light squeeze.
"It's okay, Lisa, we understand. Let's not let the night be ruined; we can still enjoy the dinner." Karen smiles and Lisa looks at her. She gives her a small smile, which I know takes a lot of effort from her. Marco doesn't say anything, but he nods in agreement with the sentiment.
I slowly pull my hand away, but Lisa laces her fingers through mine and looks sideways at me. I hope I don't wear the giddy expression I feel inside. For what seems like the first time in my life, I don't overthink things, like why I am holding her hand when I'm dating Kai.
Dinner continues well, but I find myself a little intimidated by Marco now that I know he's the chancellor. That is a huge deal. He tells us about when he moved from Thailand, and how he loves America, and the state of Washington in particular. Lisa is still holding my hand as we both struggle to eat using one hand, but neither of us seems to mind.
"The weather could be better, but it's beautiful here," Marco muses, and I nod in agreement.
"What are your plans after college?" Karen asks me as everyone finishes eating.
"I'm going to move to Seattle, and hopefully work in publishing while I work on my first book," I say with confidence.
"Publishing? Do you have any houses in mind?" Marco asks.
"Not exactly. I will take any opportunity I can get to get my foot in the door."
"That's great. I happen to have some pretty good connections at Vance. Have you heard of it?" he asks and I look at Lisa. She had mentioned knowing someone there before.
"Yes, I've heard great things about it." I smile.
"I can make a call for you if you would like, to see about an internship. It would be a great opportunity for you. You seem like a very bright young woman, and I'd love to help out."
I take my hand out of Lisa's and clasp it with my other just under my chin. "Really? That would be so nice of you! I really appreciate it!"
Marco tells me that he will call whoever it is that he knows on Monday, and I thank him repeatedly. He assures me it's nothing and that he loves to help anytime he can. I put my hand back under the table, but Lisa has moved her hand away, and when Karen stands and begins to clear the table, she excuses herself and walks off upstairs.