This wasn't Jasper's day.
Esme had had stuff to do and he hadn't wanted to go with her. Being around people hadn't been something he had felt like doing today.
He wondered if the universe had something against him though for the entire world had turned against him.
First, he broke the glass door after failing to stop on the porch which still held water from last night's rain and as he went through the glass mud and blood got on the carpet. Esme's favorite white carpet.
Second, he had to chase off a group of nomads from which he ended up killing two who had tried to attack him so he had had to burn their bodies in the backyard.
And third but not least.
Human.
He had been frustrated and irritated so he had gone out hunting to appease his mood. How was he suppose to know that there would be a woman hiking at such disturbing weather as that of a fog so thick in the forest not even he could see in it?
And while he would had been able to stand back before his hunger got the best of him she had seen him and she had gotten too close. And then her nose had started bleeding out of fucking nowhere.
He had tried to walk off but of course she was lost and followed him begging for his help. He had failed to retreat and now here he was. Miserable and drowning in absolute shame and guilt as he sat at the kitchen with his head on the counter top in hopes to disappear.
Because he had messed up.
And he knew that this time he wouldn't be forgiven like in the past.
Edward had plead to him.
Forks was still important and he had messed up.
And Carlisle would be so disappointed.
The one reason he hadn't gone to school was because he wasn't feeling capable of standing too much emotional turmoil today, but now he wished he had just sucked it up if that meant this wouldn't have happened.
But it was too late now and Esme would be home soon and she would be so disappointed.
And mad.
So mad.
And Carlisle would be twice as furious because he had upset his mate.
The sole idea of what was coming made him groan and beg for the floor to swallow him. Swallow him before Carlisle got home. Swallow him before Alice saw him. Swallow him before he was seen.
He should have been stronger. Shouldn't have been so weak due one simple nosebleed. But he had.
And now there was someone out there who would be suffering the death of their sister. Daughter. Wife. Mother.
All because Jasper was too weak to keep a tight grasp on his bloodlust.
It frustrated him to no end and it hurt to know that once again he would have to see the sadness in Alice's face. Feel her comfort as she tried to tell him that it wasn't his fault when it was . He should be able to control himself at this point.
He wanted to break something. Scream if that meant taking out the pressure in his chest that seemed eager to strangle him.
But he couldn't because if he did he would appear less composed and Esme would be sad and mad if he took it against the furniture. So all he could do was breathe in hopes to lessen the pressure in his chest that refused to die down.
A sound caught his attention.
The soft thumping of a heartbeat and the surprised flicker in emotions.
He knew this signature.
Bella .
Couldn't his luck get worse?
She was surprised. No doubt surprised at seeing glass scattered all over the stairs and porch if not also inside the house. He heard the glass crunch beneath her shoes as she climbed the stairs and while he knew he should leave or at least hide he had no will to do so.
It was as if he was stuck to the stool and he wasn't sure if the fear that he was feeling was his or the leftovers of that woman he had killed not even ten minutes ago.
He heard the sharp intake of breath and the heartbeat falter for a moment. He felt the fear and apprehension taint her emotions and the crunching of glass as she took a step back. She must had seen the blood in the carpet.
He wished now he would had left. Now his only way to escape was the kitchen's window and if Carlisle didn't kill him Esme would if he got mud on the sink.
And if he left the kitchen she would see him and God knows what her reaction could be to seeing his hands, face and clothes stained in blood. He hadn't bothered to clean up, he couldn't do much when all he could think about was how weak had he been, how pathetic it was that once again all it took to drive him mad was a bit of blood.
It was laughable.
How he who was used to have himself under absolute control would lose it with a single papercut or nosebleed.
But now wasn't time to think about that. If Bella saw him she would faint and he didn't want to touch her but if he didn't catch her there were chances for her to bleed and if she bled and someone got home he would die before someone noticed the blood he had on him wasn't hers.
Or she could see him and grow so terrified of him he would have no chances at all of getting to know the young woman that with each day grew closer to becoming friends with him. He liked the connection that had been growing between them since the fight against Victoria's newborns.
He didn't want to scare her off now that he was getting close to her.
He was so focused on his internal worries that he didn't notice the presence standing at his side until the voice cut his thoughts off and his instincts screamed.
But as he bolted back and snarled at the intruder shit hit the fan with a definitive hit that he was sure he would remember for the rest of his life.
How come his luck had kicked him in the face so hard?
He had known she was here.
~~~~~~~
Bella was sick.
Yes.
But being sick didn't mean she couldn't do her homework so she had left her bed. All of it just to find that her homework was missing, she then remembered having left it at the Cullen house.
And thus she had went to retrieve it.
Even if the others were at school and Carlisle at the hospital Esme had to be there without a doubt.
Or at least that's what she had been hoping.
Yet all she found was glass shimmering on the stairs which left her a bit surprised if not a bit confused. Climbing up the stairs she found more glass scattered all over the porch and the floor inside the house. There was mud and blood on the white carpet Esme loved so much. But considering it wasn't a huge amount of blood she tried to not let it bother her.
She stepped inside a bit hesitant. Glass crunching beneath her sneakers as she walked. The fact that no one had appeared told her the house was alone but she had come for her homework and it wasn't as if Esme didn't love to remind her that she was welcome here with or without Edward.
Still, as she made it to the stairs she caught a faint groan. That flickered her curiosity for as far as she knew the others were at school, she found him sitting on one of the stools with his head between his arms on the top counter.
Even sitting there with his face hidden as he was she recognized that golden hair.
Jasper .
She had grown closer to him ever since the Victoria issue so seeing him there giving the air of a miserable soul without even reacting to her presence was a bit unnerving. She took a step forward intending to ask if he was alright but then she caught sight of it.
There was blood on his hands. Clawed hands.
Something at the back of her mind screamed at her to step back and run while she still had the chance.
But she didn't.
She couldn't leave him like this. He had become a good friend and even if he wasn't, Alice was still her best friend and Jasper was her mate. Plus, he was also Edward's brother and in a sense hers too.
So summoning all the courage she could muster she called him.
-Jasper?
The reaction was immediate. He bolted up and let out such an animalistic snarl she almost had a cardiac arrest right then right there. The sudden sight of how much in blood he was covered along with the same eyes as the Volturi he was sporting would had made her knees falter at the meaning behind if it wasn't because of the sudden pain that explode in her arm.
She stepped back with a pained half surprised cry holding her now bleeding arm.
Panic flooded inside her at the fact that her arm was bleeding and God friend or not she was well aware of the one Cullen who was an absolute danger to have near her while bleeding.
Jasper lunged for her and in a last attempt to fight for her life she hit him which worked as well as hitting a brick wall and God her wrist screamed . He grabbed her wrists and she kicked out. Struggling with all her might and thanking the adrenaline for taking the blazing pain from her arm.
-Bella stop!- Jasper's voice was strained and almost panicked. That made her stop struggling against him.- Stop . You'll bleed out. We need to stop that blood.- He pulled her off the ground before her brain could even process it. Her legs almost giving out.
What the hell was happening?
~~~~~~~~~
Jasper had felt the terror hit him the second he smelt the blood and realized what he had done. Bella's panic hitting him like a crushing wave that froze him on the spot for a moment, her cry of pain making his legs move on instinct as he lunged for her because God he had to stop that blood.
Of course in her fear she would fight him. Couldn't blame her considering no sane human would want a vampire near while bleeding.
But he had to stop the bleeding because the smell of her sweet blood was pooling into his senses like a pleasing cloak of hunger. Even with the woman he just drank he felt the fire at the back of his throat but considering how much time he had spent around her he was confident he could stand the smell of her blood well enough to not want to jump her.
But she wouldn't stop struggling and spreading her glorious sweetness in the air.
He grabbed her wrists in a tight hold. Venom accumulating in his mouth at the feeling of blood under his fingers. Warm and- no .
-Bella stop!- He shouted at last needing her to calm down so he could calm down.- Stop . You'll bleed out. We need to stop that blood.- He told her feeling his voice crack at the end as a shiver ran down his spine. He crushed down the thirst.
This was his sister. Sister . Human or not she was not food. She was his sister. Edward's mate. It was his job to protect her until she could become one of them. Focus .
He got up and pulled her up by her good arm, she stumbled but he made sure to help her keep her balance. He could feel her confusion and her panic. The pain and the taint of fear and betrayal.
But he had no time for that.
He led her to the living room and tore part of his sleeve, pressing it against her wound.
-Hold it there. I'll be back.- He told her and was grateful she wasn't shocked enough to not do as told, he flew to Carlisle and Esme's bathroom where he knew a first aid kit was kept specifically for Bella. He grabbed it and ran back to Bella.
She jumped when he reappeared, again, he couldn't blame her. He put the kit on the table before kneeling before her and grabbing her arm, he removed the cloth and inspected the wound, it wasn't dangerously deep but it was still gonna leave a horrible scar of four perfect lines.
Something about that fact made him feel sick.
He took some disinfectant out and glanced up at her.
-I'll try to appease your pain but I'm not gonna lie, this is gonna hurt like a bitch.- He told her. Bella nodded. The confusion was still pooling out of her but now it was clouded with the expectation of pain.
He grabbed a cotton ball before pouring alcohol on it. The smell of it making him grimace but at least it distracted him from the suffocating scent of her blood. He pressed the dripping cotton ball on the wound and felt Bella tense. He sent waves of calm towards her hoping to sooth her pain but not even that stopped the hiss and the shuddering breath that came from her as he kept dabbing at the wound making sure to clean all the blood off.
At least it wasn't bad enough for it to need stitches.
When he was done he put the cotton ball down and grabbed some gauze and bandages. Careful with each movement as he pressed the gauze against it and began bandaging her arm.
-Bella I'm so sorry.- He found himself saying as he finished putting the safety pins to keep the bandage in place, not too tight not too loose, just as he had seen Carlisle do.
-It's fine. That's on me for startling you.- Bella said. Now that she wasn't at the verge of bleeding to death or in potential danger of becoming a snack she could see how startling a vampire hadn't been her brightest idea.
Like that time she punched a werewolf.
Jasper still looked miserable so she sighed.
-Would it make you feel better if we were to share the blame for this? I shouldn't have startled you and you shouldn't have gone all pissed cat on me.
-Bella-
-No. You have two options, we share or it's all mine.
He scowled at her which considering his current bloodied appearance was twice as intimidating as usual. She liked him but man did she doubted she would ever get over how intimidating he looked.
Her emotions seemed to have broadcasted her seriousness on the matter because his shoulders dropped in defeat. He still looked guilty though so she patted his shoulder. He stiffened at the gesture and she had to hit herself mentally, only she was stupid enough to touch a vampire with her bloodied hand.
-Sorry.- She was quick to apologize as she took her hand off him.
-'m fine.- He muttered as he retreated and began picking the stuff he had used to fix her arm up.
His crimson gaze settled upon the ground refusing to look at her.
Part of her wanted to know what had happened but she knew that that was not her business.
And for the first time ever she pondered what did Carlisle do when one of them drank human blood. Would he get mad? Punish them? No. She doubted Carlisle was even capable of getting mad.
Plus wouldn't punishing them come out as unfair seeing that that was their nature?
She tried to not think about that and instead glanced down at her arm.
-I didn't knew vampires had claws.- Bella said as her hand touched the bandage. The fact that the throbbing wasn't bothering her that much made her ponder if Jasper was to blame for that.
At her words his movements stopped. His shoulders growing tense.
-They don't.
He didn't look at her as he gave that confusing answer.
-Then how come you have claws?
He glanced at her with such guilt in his gaze it crushed her chest. It was almost as if he was silently begging for her forgiveness over something she couldn't understand.
-They weren't claws but my fingernails, there weren't claws, just common fingernails. Human fingernails.
Jasper hated using compulsion on her but it had to be done. He needed to hide it. Even if lately things had been getting harder and harder to hide.
Bella slumped for a moment with a glazed look before seeming to come back to the present.
-You should go upstairs and wash your hands. Maybe borrow one of Edward's shirts too.- He told. She was covered in blood after all.
Jasper watched Bella leave before going back to picking up stuff. He heard the sound of water running and felt his shoulders relax a bit.
He couldn't help his gaze from falling on the blood coating his hands and he had to bit back the urge to lick it. He couldn't do that.
Because if he did then all his effort to get used to the scent of Bella would go down the drain for he knew if he tasted her blood he wouldn't be able to not want more.
He finished putting the stuff away and as he closed the first aid kit he heard it.
Edward's Volvo.