AN: Here we got a really long, slice of life goodness chapter for Xikira and Elrena! Because they really needed it lol! xD Especially Elrena... :D With a bit of Luxu thrown in!
"Okay, I'm finished: come look at these!"
Luxu crossed Xikira's room, coming up beside her chair to peer down at the sheets of paper that the kid had arranged on her desk.
He examined the drawings in silence: one depicted two familiar figures sitting on a high tower with a bell behind them; the other showed an old mansion in a clearing, with a crumbling wall and a destroyed metal gate leading into the courtyard.
"What are these about?" he said finally, casually placing a hand on the back of the kid's chair.
She looked up at him, hands in her lap, an excited smile on her face. "This one is me and Roxas together...after yesterday's mission." Doubt came to her face. Hesitation. That smile flickering. She was watching his face - judging him. Expecting...
"And?" he said casually, gesturing to the drawings and flashing her an exaggerated grin. "Don't leave me hanging, princess."
Her smile returned in full - and a glint of relief shined in her blue eyes. "He took me up to the clock tower - the one over the train station - in Twilight Town. We had ice cream, and we talked. He said that Axel and him go up there for ice cream after their assignments, too. To talk and...eat ice cream."
"Do they? Looks like a sweet view," Luxu remarked. "And how about this other one?" He reached out and tapped the page.
She half moved to swat his hand away - then shoved her hands between her legs, ducking her head with a blush. "That one's the place where Roxas and I actually finished our mission. We fought a giant Heartless - purple, with tentacles on its face, and a big hole in its chest shaped like a heart."
"Hmm. Well, were you more interested in the place, or what? Because I don't see any giant Heartless in this picture," Luxu said absently.
"I know - I'll draw another one with it, and me and Roxas in it...later," Xikira said quietly. Halting. Obvious that something was distressing her. Distracting her.
"Got something on your mind?" Luxu asked, simple and quiet.
Xikira glanced up at him from under that long blonde hair of hers. Then she bowed her head again. "I...yes. But you have to keep it between us."
"Sure," he said instantly - nonchalant. His interest was piqued now...
"When we first got to this place..." Xikira indicated the drawing again with her little elbow. "Something happened to me. It- caused me to get hurt. The Heartless caught me off guard. Knocked me flat. Because..."
"What happened?"
"That mansion...it felt familiar to me, somehow, for...just a moment." Xikira went on, in a murmur. "And it scared me, Xigbar. I felt...in here-" She put her hand to her chest, shaking her head. "-I can't explain it. And then I heard something."
"Heard what...?" he pressed, delicate. Patient. But inside, he was focused on her now. Attentive as anyone could be.
"I heard...myself." She raised her head, looking up at him again. "I heard my voice, and Roxas's, too. We were talking. But it's not a conversation I can ever remember having. In fact, our first real conversation was that mission! But...I was talking to him, saying that I was a witch, or- that someone called me that. I didn't sound happy about it. Someone named DiZ?"
Luxu's hand gripped the kid's chair a little bit tighter. "Where'd you hear a name like that?"
"I just told you..."
"Hm..." Luxu straightened, turning away from her. "Seems to me like your memory powers aren't as under control as we'd all like to think, if you're still getting random flashes like this...enough to make you vulnerable to giant Heartlesses." And that was the truth, wasn't it. But who could she have picked that name up from? Whose memories? Only a few members of the Organization had had run-ins with old Ansem The Wise over the past eight years or so, since the man had escaped his banishment to the Dark Realm; the man was as elusive of them as he was relentless in trying to screw with their plans (not that he'd had much success at that)...
"Does that name mean something to you?" Xikira stood as well, scraping her chair along the floor.
Luxu turned back to her, gazing down at her. That interest, that eagerness... "It means something to certain people in this Organization," he finally said. He shrugged and grinned again. "Couldn't tell you if it means a thing to me personally, though."
"Who is DiZ?"
Luxu set a hand on his hip, gave his free arm a grandiose wave. "Nobody you need to worry about. Just an old dude who's in waaaay over his head."
"Who, Xigbar?" she said, more firmly, stepping in toward him.
He narrowed his eye down at her, surprised. That look of hardness on her face now, mixed with that glimmer of...fear? Anxiety? "What's it matter to you, Xikira?"
She faltered. Her face broke. Her chin fell to her chest, and her hands joined at her waist. Then, one hand broke free, climbing to touch her chest. It became a fist, right over her Heart. "I'm not sure..." she whispered. "But just hearing the name, just saying it on my own tongue...it scares me."
Now what was this about...? Had she...? Or Kairi, possibly, over the past few months of her adventures? A ruler of a world having a run-in with a special resident of said world, maybe...? One who'd been a rather frequent visitor of the castle's public areas, back in the day (Luxu remembered seeing the Princess in those halls, once or twice - just passing by with that old woman)...
Either way...
Luxu let his hand fall from his body. "You remember anything else related to that name? Maybe Kairi heard about it somewhere, and you picked that up from her Heart...? Or have you heard or seen anything about the man?"
Xikira shook her head. "No? It's not Kairi, it's- me. But...I've never met anyone called DiZ before. I'd never even heard that name until...yesterday."
Interesting. Could the memory girl have had her own memories messed with, then? Luxu knew there was more than one way to skin a memory cat...from magic to technologies, the worlds over...and old Ansem had past experiences with memory tech, even, from those days of experiments...
The research he'd begun, but then ordered a stop to after discovering how much further his apprentices had all gone...
"Xigbar?" Xikira's voice, quiet and uncertain. Worried. "Do you think there's something wrong with me?"
Luxu forced a smile, and reached out to pat her on the head. "Don't sweat it, kiddo - there's not a thing wrong with you. Beyond the usual memory powers deal. You just let your control slip for a moment there, that's all. Must've been too distracted by being on a mission with Roxas," he added humorously.
She blushed again, stepping back out of his grasp. "I wasn't that distracted! We beat it, didn't we? All by ourselves! We earned that ice cream!"
"Hey, you won't get any arguments from me," Luxu said quickly, holding up his hands. "Totally believe you, princess."
"Good," she said with a smile, suddenly calming. All that emotion of hers bleeding away. She turned and sat back down in her chair; she set her two latest drawings aside and reached for a fresh sheet of paper.
Luxu watched her a minute, emotions surging in his Heart again. Emotions he didn't need. Couldn't take. He turned to stride for the exit. "Keep drawing - I'm off to take a walk. Be a good girl for me."
"Okay," she said, in a distracted tone of voice. She was already deep in focus on whatever her next masterpiece was going to be.
Good, he thought to himself, stepping out into the hallway. That's all she needs to be focusing on right now, anyways.
It was for other people to worry about where the hell she'd honestly pulled out the name "DiZ."
Luxu had hardly gone a few feet down the hall when he nearly ran right smack into Elrena.
She froze before they reached each other - panic, fear, crossing her face. Like she'd been caught out at something.
Luxu saw her eyes flicker from him, to Xikira's door. Then, she focused solely on him, drawing herself up and pulling the nastiest look she could onto her face.
"Would it kill you to watch where you're going?" she said sharply.
"Would it kill you to loosen up a little?" Luxu responded, laughing.
"Yes!"
"So...I suppose chatting up Xikira isn't helping you at all in that department, is it?" Luxu said casually.
That look on her face again. Pure fear. Alarm, even. It was always just so easy to not even really say anything truthful or accurate and let other people's reactions confirm it for you. She scoffed, turned her head aside - her nose up at him. "What? Why would I care about-"
"I've seen how you've been spending time with her lately," Luxu said quietly, eyeing her intently. "No point in denying it."
Elrena's head came around so fast he thought it'd pop off her body. "Pfft - so?! What does it matter to you how I spend my free time? How is that any of your business?"
"Doesn't matter at all to me," Luxu shrugged. "None of my business whatsoever. Except, here's the thing - I've got the kid clinging to me like a leech lately, and I need some time away from her. Every time I think I've shaken her off, she comes right back! So...how about you do me a favor and take her off my hands for the day? Lock her up in your room on a leash, take her out shopping or whatever it is girls do - just keep her away from me for a while."
"And why would I ever do anything for you?" Elrena snorted.
"Well...because I think you've got something under all that...that." Luxu gestured.
"You gestured to all of me," Elrena said flatly, offended.
"Yeah, I did, didn't I? And I saw it, that something, the day I recruited you," Luxu said quietly. "So how about you drop the act and try being yourself for once for me?"
"What are you even talking about?!"
"You know what? Not a clue!" Luxu laughed. He waved at her and turned away. "But you know, I could always make it an order..." he added silkily.
"Fine! Whatever game you're playing - I'll go along with it," Elrena snarled, crossing her arms at him.
"You always have."
"And I don't have to like it!" she added.
"You never have..."
"Whatever! I'll take your little special interest brat off your hands for you for a while. But that's it!" Elrena stalked past him with loud clicking heels, disappearing right into Xikira's room.
Thank you...Elrena. Enjoy yourself, if you can. No idea how you ended up attached to her, but it's...good to know.
And it wasn't something Xemnas needed to know about - not from Luxu, at any rate. Just one more thing in the long list of things that Luxu kept to himself around here...kept from Xehanort. And keeping this...it was the least he could do for them - for Xikira and Elrena, both. Letting them have that...whatever it was. The least he could do...to look after them in life.
Luxu stretched big, walking off in the opposite direction of Elrena.
Time to get in a nice, lazy day for himself.
Trying to manage the chaos magnet, chatterbox of a blonde mop-head that was Xikira was just about the most taxing thing he'd ever done in his life.
And that...that was saying something.
He stopped, at a new, but old feeling in his Heart.
He glanced back down the hall, to that door.
Just for a moment...
Elrena...
Luxu appeared out of the dark portal, standing before the dark, rocky pathway up to the black castle.
Back in this world again - back for some deeper investigations.
Lord Xemnas had sensed something here - the birth of a Nobody. Nothingness itself coalescing. The element he was so attuned to, across all worlds...allowing him to instantly pinpoint the formation of any new Nobodies within them.
He'd sent Luxu - or, Xigbar, rather - out to bring this one home. A new member.
It wasn't hard to infiltrate the dark castle. Wasn't hard to bypass all those halls, those areas of stone and water. Wasn't hard to find his way into the lower levels...right to where he had to be.
What he was looking for.
He strode down a dark hallway, lined with cell doors - iron bars.
Stopped before a single door.
A young woman, sitting there on the floor of the cell, her head bowed. A head of blonde hair. She wore this tattered old outfit, grimy and filthy. Her arms at her sides. Legs crossed. Not moving, not even breathing.
Luxu stepped forward - and that head came up - and he froze. For an instant, for a second. But he did.
it was her...? After all this time, finally, this...this was where she'd been spat out of - out of the Ark?
That unmistakable hair, and those eyes, the shape of that face...
Every kid he'd committed to memory back then, wanting to help them not just then, to escape the destruction of Daybreak Town - but to be able to be there in the future to help them, too. To be right there...for them...when they reappeared. Whenever...they would finally reappear...
"Who are you?" her voice came - older now, but so similar. And flat. Dead.
Luxu raised a hand, and blew the bars apart with dark fire. A paltry drawing out of the darkness in his Heart. But it did the job.
The woman within rose to her feet, gazing at him now. Expressionless. Vacant. Unafraid. Unconcerned.
Luxu stepped forward slowly, raising his hands to her anyways while he did. "The name's Xigbar." How he hated having to give that name. How he hated...having to pull this act with her. With one of the ones he'd vowed deep in his Heart to look after. He'd finally found her, and he couldn't even tell her... He stopped before her. He turned one of his hands over, palm up, offering it to her. "I'm the same as you," he added quietly...meaningfully...in the way only he knew. The way she couldn't know...not anymore...
For a split second he thought she did, thought she had somehow...It was something in her eyes. Something that shifted, that glinted at him. But then it was gone. Gone and dead. "What?" came that dead voice again.
"What's your name?" Luxu responded.
"My...name...?"
"You don't have one?"
"No, of course I do, it's-!" Life, fury, a spark, something real. And then- "Elrena..."
So she had it. She had her name, if nothing else. She still had a name.
But he knew from the way she said it...that her own name meant nothing to her.
Luxu wished he could tell her - give it meaning again. A meaning for her...
He sighed, shaking his hand at her. "Come on, we don't have all day. Take it and let's go."
"Where?" she said flatly, gazing at him, unblinking.
"Someplace not here," Luxu told her. "A place...to belong."
Again, something there, some remnant or trace, some...
Or was it just Luxu desperately wanting to see...what he desperately wanted to see in her? A familiar face, someone to share a memory with - a connection - after so long alone...?
She raised a hand and placed it in his, mechanically. Face void of any emotion whatsoever.
"Taking the useless husk, then?" came a voice behind Luxu. "What in the world could you possibly want her for?"
Luxu turned to see...a figure he recognized.
The dark witch, Maleficent. Owner of this castle, of course.
"Did you do this to her?" Luxu asked quietly.
"I did nothing," the woman said airily. "The girl simply refused my generous offer one too many times. Again and again...the darkness growing in her own Heart...until it finally consumed her. What has happened to her, she did to herself alone. She is a spiteful and stubborn one; I never expected her to hold out as long as she did, for literal years in that cell...But I suppose it was her wish to waste herself away."
Luxu drew back his lips at her, showing his teeth. He itched to pull out his gun and send a round her way - even if it might not actually hit. But... He let it go, and he shrouded himself and Elrena in darkness, teleporting them out of the castle.
They reappeared at the end of that dark path, across a bridge and a forest of thorns.
Elrena suddenly tore her hand out of his grasp, her face twitching. Her arm fell to her side. She stared into the void, past him.
"So...Elrena, was it? What the hell happened back there?" Luxu said casually.
Elrena blinked. Her fingers...curled briefly at her side before letting go again. "I...couldn't..."
"What?"
"Something...inside me...couldn't give in to the darkness." Her voice, stronger now, more certain. But still not alive. Not a trace of feeling, no Heart in it. Just recital of fact, memory of reason and echo of emotions missing now in her. "I refused...again...and again...and again. No matter what she told me. No matter how much they wanted to hurt me."
Luxu looked to the sky, putting his hands on his hips. He couldn't, in that moment... "Yet here you are, existing as a Nobody..."
"A what?"
"It means you lost your Heart - to the darkness."
Elrena's face...sharpened. Her hand curled again - into a fist. She stepped forward. Then, she sighed, and her head fell. Hung. "I just...couldn't hold out any more. You understand? I was hurt, I was tired, I was...sick of all of it. I just wanted to go to sleep - but I woke up again. You understand me, right?" she asked again.
Luxu glanced at her face. Those green eyes glimmering now with something...He looked away again quickly. He raised a hand, gave it a little wave.
"Yeah," he said quietly. "I do."
More than you could ever know, now...
"Elrena? Hello...?"
"Hm? What?"
Xikira giggled at the look on the woman's face. The pink tinge, the way she tossed her head and glance around the mall quickly. How she wrung her hands at her waist before quickly dropping it...
"You were spacing out," Xikira said.
"Yes, I was: what of it?" Elrena snorted.
"Nothing...I guess..." Xikira smiled.
Elrena rolled her eyes and quickened her stride. "I hope you appreciate what I'm doing for you here - because I so did not want to be here! And on top of that, this sort of thing isn't even my style. I don't do the whole, 'Oh, let's go on a girly little shopping trip, let's try on clothes, let's giggle over cute boys!' Gag me, for fuck's sake..."
Xikira frowned, dropping her head. Then she looked up at Elrena again. "If you're not comfortable with being out like this, we can just go back to the castle-"
"WHAT? Who said I was uncomfortable?" Elrena hissed, cutting her off. "Like I can't handle a crowded shopping mall? Who do you think I am?!"
"I'm- sorry. I just...wanted to be- considerate!"
"Well don't waste your breath," Elrena snapped. "I'm perfectly fine. That is not the issue."
"Okay! I believe you."
"Good!"
"Stupid little...fucking shit...like I can't walk through a fucking mall without getting all weepy..." Elrena continued to mutter furiously. She shot a sharp glare at Xikira. "Where the hell did you even get that idea, anyways?!"
"N-nowhere! I didn't get the idea from- anywhere, I just noticed you looked- tense?"
"Next time you notice something, don't go opening your mouth about it, okay?"
"Okay! I'm sorry..."
"Whatever."
Xikira glanced away, walking on in silence through the crowds. Making her way toward her favorite clothing shop in all of Twilight Town's mall. After a minute, she risked another look at Elrena - and she pulled a grin over her face. "This is fun, right?"
"No," Elrena said flatly.
"But, buying real clothes is totally spiting Xemnas," Xikira said casually. "Going against the rules, and...the Organization outfit sucks, doesn't it? I mean, these coats are so uncomfortable, and who designed the gloves and boots look anyways?"
Elrena cocked her head at her, staring at her now. A light to her green eyes. A small grin came to her face as well! "You're not...wrong, no. These coats do suck! This whole getup is ridiculously terrible for sleeping in, especially! I don't even know why this is all we get - like it's our brand or something? We're not a band! Who are we trying to show off for with that? 'Oh, we're all part of the same group here!' It's not like we aren't told every single day to 'not draw attention to ourselves.' I doubt Xemnas even has a working brain in his head! Or that ass, Saix! We'd be way better off actually trying to change our clothes to fit the local attire!"
"I tried bringing that up before to Xigbar, but he just said he follows orders and not to question it."
Elrena laughed, bringing her hand to her mouth. "Lies, I'm sure! He's Number Two - if it wasn't Xemnas who made the stupid rule, it could only have come from Xigbar's idiot brain! Well, even if it wasn't...I'll blame him for it anyways. It makes me feel nice inside."
Xikira laughed too. Then she was back to furiously searching her own mind - and other people's memories - for something else to say to Elrena. To keep these good feelings going.
"Erm- so- so...if we're getting our own clothes together, we should start our own group!" Xikira proclaimed. "Like a...skirt wearing...brigade?"
Elrena blinked. "A what now?"
"Skirt brigade...? Because we both have skirts, and- and-"
"You can't make a brigade with just two people. You'd need a few thousand for that," Elrena said mildly.
"Well...maybe we're just starting out? So we only have two members for now...?"
"No," Elrena said flatly, rolling her eyes. "Don't be an idiot."
"Sorry."
Elrena sighed, brushing her hair back behind an ear. "I suppose I can excuse it, seeing as you're only a day shy of three weeks old," she stated, and Xikira realized she was teasing her!
"Thanks - that's really generous," Xikira responded playfully.
"Never say I don't do anything for you, kid."
"I won't."
Xikira raced into her favorite shop, beaming around herself.
She went through the aisles with Elrena in tow, sifting through items and sorting them out. Then, her eyes found the aisle that Xigbar had previously told her wasn't for "pretty princesses." Xikira went over there anyways, looking the clothing articles over with hungry eyes. Then she pulled a red and black little dress off a rack, with straps and slits and this big open spot on the chest area shaped like a diamond. Like someone had just cut into it or something. It was really interesting!
"What about this?" Xikira said, turning to show it off to Elrena.
Elrena blinked rapidly. Her mouth fell open, and her cheeks flushed. Then, she grinned wide. "Ooooh, you are a racy little thing, aren't you?!" she shrilled with mirth.
"Racy?"
"It means what I've said all along about you is completely true, Xiki: you're a little pervert! You want to show off your goods - not that you have anything to work with in that department..." Elrena added, eyeing her and snorting loudly.
"Xiki?"
Elrena froze. "Um- what?"
"You said Xiki. You...gave me a nickname!"
"Okay, it just slipped out - don't go- r-reading into it too much! Don't lose your head over it! I'm not- it doesn't..." Elrena slapped her hand to her face, turning away. Then she spun back around, snatched the dress from Xikira's hands and stalked off for the dressing rooms. "This thing's mine - don't trash the place while I'm in here - and don't go blabbing to the world about that nickname, because it's not going to stick!"
"Okay," Xikira said happily, a warm glow in her chest.
It had all been going so well - why had it fallen apart?!
Why did Elrena have to be so...WHY?
After going through some more outfits, after laughing and having fun, after they'd had ice cream, and after Xikira had even gotten new art supplies, Elrena had started to slide back into being all...irritated and rude and- and- impatient.
It hadn't been too fun anymore...
And now Elrena had just flat out declared that they were leaving! Leaving the store, the mall, this whole world! She'd said they'd spent more than enough time out, that it was lame and boring and stupid and- so much else!
Xikira reluctantly trailed after the woman, past restaurants and other clothes shops, her big bag of outfits held at her waist.
Elrena strode ahead relentlessly, her own bag held at her side. Suddenly she stopped, huffing and looking back at Xikira. "Hey, what's the holdup?! Stop dragging your feet! We can't take all night to get back."
"I just- couldn't we stay a few more hours-" Xikira begged, stopping too. Bowing her head.
"Oh, HELL NO!" Elrena exclaimed, whirling and stalking up to her. "Are you crazy or something? You wasted all your munny - not just on clothes, but on new paper and pencils - and now you want to, what? Waste the rest of mine too? Because that's the only way you'd even buy anything else in this place if we did stay! And that isn't happening! No way am I letting you take advantage of me that way!"
"I didn't mean- I just thought we could- look around or-" Xikira tried to say.
"Look around?" Elrena's face twisted. She threw up her free arm. "Why would we waste hours of time doing that? What's there to look at? You can see it all, right now! It's boring, stupid people, everywhere! How exciting!"
"But I want to stay, I want to-"
"Okay, shut up - no - come on!" Elrena stepped closer and grabbed Xikira's arm, yanking her forward. "We. Are. Leaving. Enough whining! You're not a toddler!"
Xikira began to cry, digging in her heels and pulling free of the woman.
"Oh, come on- no! Don't pull this shit with me-"
Xikira sank to the floor, dropping her bag and wrapping her arms around herself. I don't want to go back, I want to stay - I want this forever! Why can't I have this?!
"What are you doing?" Elrena hissed, glaring down at her. "Get up, come on, get-!"
Xikira cried harder.
"Would you just- you're drawing a crowd, you little-" Elrena turned away, crossing her arms and staring at the ceiling as people did start to look at them.
Xikira kept crying.
Elrena's expression turned to panic more than anything, as people began to come nearer to them. She let her arms fall, whirling around and dropping down beside Xikira. "Okay, listen to me, listen - why don't we go get some more ice cream? Or- or we can look at more clothes for- how about another half an hour? We can get you some tacky jewelry! Or- or how about the arcades? You're a teenager, right? You like arcades? Come on, just stop it, just stop crying, please for the love of...I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry! I was impatient, I was rude, I- HEY! Are you even fucking listening to me when I'm trying to-"
Xikira. Cried. Loudly now.
"Shit, okay, shit...how do you even do this...? Um...okaaay..." Suddenly, Elrena pulled Xikira into her arms. Squeezing her. Very tightly. "Here. See? We're all- fun and cute and pretty and rainbows and sunshine and ice cream and- puppies and kitties and...ick...and we're the queens of fashion and the- mmm...skirt brigade? Right? Remember? Hey, remember that? Remember?!"
Xikira raised her head, gazing at her with puffy eyes. "You...really said it? We're...in the skirt brigade together...?"
"I'm wearing a skirt, aren't I?" Elrena whispered out quickly. "Soooo...yes! We are. We definitely, totally are. So why don't we...why don't we not cry anymore! Instead let's find reasons to be- happy. Let's go have fun, let's...I'm sorry. But if you give me a chance, I can turn this around for you! I can- be- better?" she strangled out.
"Really...?"
"Yes! Please...I'm sorry...I've been terrible, and awful, and- a piece of shit...and you shouldn't even call me a- a friend..." Elrena murmured this last part out quickly.
Xikira sniffled. Then she hugged Elrena around the neck, clinging to her.
"Ooookay, that's right, yeah, go hugs and...crap. Good, that's good, this is fine...this is what we want to be doing..." Elrena patted her on the back a few times gingerly. "Now please stand up, let's- let's wipe those eyes, let's...go back to the clothing shop!"
Xikira nodded, standing. She wiped her nose on her coat sleeve furiously.
"N-no, HEY!" Elrena caught her wrist, her eyes wide. She froze, then let her go. "Come on - that's gross, kiddo. Let's get you to the restrooms; we'll get you something to actually wipe all that crap off you. Come on..."
They picked up their bags again, and Xikira followed her silently, her head down.
Elrena led Xikira over to a sink, forcing her to stand there. As Elrena stood behind Xikira, she sort of just...stared at herself in the mirror. She sighed, she frowned deeply. Then she dropped her bag, and put her hands on Xikira's shoulders - very delicately. "Look...I really am sorry...okay? It's just that we've been here for five fucking hours now, and I am tired and my damn feet hurt in these heels, and..." She blew a big breath of frustrated air. "That aside, look, I know I'm terrible. But...I'd like to be less terrible going forward. Because I- I wasn't...terrible, before, was I? In my memories? The memories of life that you gave back to me. That I'm...grateful for. That I- I'm so thankful to have again. To know who I am, who I was...that I had a Keyblade..."
Elrena sighed again before going on. "I used to be someone half-way decent. Maybe even two-thirds decent. But since...losing all of that, and then having to live for years in a world where... The things I've been through have changed me, okay? And not...for the better. I know that! I know. And I...don't...think I want to be this way anymore. I want to...become that girl I can remember being again, now. The person I was before. I want to be...her again. Elrena. Because even she was a hundred times better of a person than this...tattered, fucked up husk of a woman that I am today..."
Elrena suddenly pulled Xikira backwards - right into her arms. Right against her body. She held her there, letting her head fall. Her lips met the top of Xikira's head. Her eyes closed, and...a tear fell from one of her eyes, onto Xikira's head. Into her hair.
"I'm sorry..." Elrena whispered, a quaver to her voice. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry...I'm sorry...Please...I'm sorry...because-" She stopped. Then- "You're right, okay? I'm shit with crowds, I don't like people everywhere, I can't...and it's only been worse after years and years of being alone in a tiny, cold, stone room...and all of that built up inside me and I took it out on you. Along with the...maybe justified shit...which still wasn't great of me..."
Xikira squirmed, turning around in Elrena's arms. She gazed up at Elrena. Into her face that was...soft now. Those blinking, teary eyes of green... "I think I can forgive you. As long as you mean it. That you'll...be better. Nicer, and kinder! And...and I'm sorry if you didn't want to be here this long!" she added swiftly, as memories came to her of Kairi having a similar experience with her dad - making him tired, snappish, even, and just wanting to go home. Memories that made Xikira feel...embarrassed!
"I...I want to be better," Elrena breathed, nodding. "I really want to. But...it's going to be a work in progress, I think. But I'm going to try harder going forward. Because I...know...all right? You'd say it, Lauriam would say it...I'm such a bitch."
Xikira hugged her waist, pressing her face into her chest. "I'll...hold you to that?" she whispered.
"Deal."
A minute passed them by like this.
"All right, Xiki, how about you get your face out of my tits; you're getting them all snotty."
"Sorry!"
"It's- fine. Whatever, you know? Let's just clean you up before it gets worse!"