MAJOR TRIGGER WARNING
There's child neglect and abuse littered throughout. If this causes you any mental distress I urge you to please skip this chapter!
Chapter 2: SONIC
At age four, Olgilvie never spoke a word.
He would sit silently at home, waiting for his mother to come home after leaving in the early mornings. Every night she brought home a bag of food. Every night she would toss him a dry piece of bread. Every night he would quietly eat it and drink some water from the tap when he was sure his mother was asleep.
Sometimes she would bring people home with her. Some were other men from the village and she would lock herself in a room with them and would be given money as they left the house later in the evening or in the morning. Other visitors came by in the evening to make she still "kept the monster in check" for the sake of the people.
Olgilvie knew they were talking about him. It was hard not to make that connection when they always glared and pointed fingers at him.
His mother told him long ago that she was helping him to contain the Chaos within himself. That he should be thanking her every time she corrected him for moving too quickly or speaking to anyone. That he should be glad she was breaking the curse he placed upon their village so that they could purchase food again.
But how could he be glad when every time someone came to tell their woes to the one person he had left, it ended in another beating for him?
So he kept quiet. He stayed out of sight. He never left his home.
Olgilvie wondered if it really was all his fault. If he had just been born right, would this still be happening to him?
As he sat in his bed he pulled out a picture frame from under his pillow. The last one in the house that he had saved after his mother came home smelling funny and went about destroying all the pictures in their home and throwing them out. He recognized her easily under the broken glass with her purple fur and her blue eyes that were crinkled with a contentment that he didn't see in her now. The other hedgehog in the photo that stood proudly as he stared into the camera, with his well-groomed blue fur and his mischievous brown eyes, was someone Olgilvie didn't recognize. But every night, just like this night, he looked into the face of that mysterious hedgehog and felt a sense of calm.
Was he somewhere out there? Did he know who Olgilvie was? Could he come and help him or would he hate the Chaos in him too?
Was this his father he killed as a small boy?
"OLGILVIE!"
The front door slammed shut and the hoglet scrambled to place the frame back under his pillow before Bernadette could see it out lest she destroy it too. With it securely in place he made his way into the living room, careful not to move too fast and anger his already agitated mother.
"Where were you today?!" she demanded. Her blue eyes, while they had been carefree in the photo, they glared down at him now like a storm.
Olgilvie flattened his ears at the volume of Bernie's shouts, and sheepishly pointed towards his room.
"Oh really? Do you want to tell me then why several of the children saw a blue hedgehog running around the village today?"
He shook his head vigorously. He never left the house and knew he wasn't allowed. They were lying, but she would never believe him.
Mom never did.
"So if I go in your room, right now, I won't find anything from outside in there?"
Bernadette still pierced him with that harsh stare. Olgilvie shook his head again.
For a beat he thought he was going to get out of this. That his mother would sigh and tell him that she believed him. That she would still give him dinner and not a punishment.
But instead she stepped around him with a huff and headed into his bedroom. Olgilvie followed behind, keeping on her heels, ready to prove to her that he didn't disobey, that the Chaos in him didn't touch the village.
Her eyes spotted the corner on the picture frame under his pillow.
Olgilvie began to panic. She wouldn't take it away, right? It was never outside! He never went outside!
She pulled it out and held it between her hands.
"Did you lie to me, Olgilvie?"
Tears fell down his cheeks, soaking his fur, as he shook his head again.
"Then what's this?" She held up the picture frame. "I threw them all out, Olgilvie. Where did you get this?! You went out there, didn't you?!"
He couldn't stop shaking.
What was she going to do?
He couldn't hide, she'd find him.
Bernadette threw the picture at the wall past her son's quivering form, not taking her eyes off of him as it shattered into countless tiny pieces. She never moved to punish him, though. She didn't yell again. She was as still as a statue, except for her eyes. The storm in them no longer raged, but in them now was a steely resolve as she observed her son.
He had tainted the village in her mind, and now she made up her mind on how to resolve it.
"We will talk about this in the morning," she simply said. "Go to bed."
Olgilvie watched her leave his room and close the door behind her. Not wanting to risk her wrath if she decided to come back in, he crawled into his bed once again, but this time instead of taking comfort from his secret photo he could only stare at its remains on his bedroom floor.
His mother never did return that night. And while he couldn't sleep, he never dared to venture out to get food or water or risk her anger again. So in bed he stayed. With every toss and turn he felt his fear grow for what the morning would hold and as he watched the sunlight filter in through his window he found himself absolutely petrified.
A knock sounded from his door.
"Sweetheart," Bernadette called out. "It's time to get up."
He sat up as his mother walked in, dressed in her foraging clothes and holding a piece of jelly covered bread.
"I'm sorry about not giving you dinner last night, but I have something extra special for you to make up for it.
Olgilvie almost cried in relief as he took the food from her and bit into it, savoring the taste of the sweet fruit. Did this mean that she wasn't angry at him anymore? Did she believe him?
Bernie watched her son eat with a careful eye.
"How about we go for a walk today?"
Silence stretched between them. Bernadette had never suggested such a thing before and Olgilvie knew he was forbidden from leaving their home.
But maybe, just maybe, this was genuine?
There wasn't time to weigh options when he had this chance to finally go outside. He wanted to experience it, to feel that freedom if only for a moment.
He nodded his head and quickly finished his breakfast. He didn't want to waste anymore time and followed his mother as she headed to the front door.
As she opened it for him, he struggled to keep his legs under control when he saw just how vast the world was. He wanted to sprint and never stop to look back, but he was brought back to reality when his mother took hold of his hand.
He looked up to her face and while there was no smile there, the warmth of her paw firmly holding his was enough to get him grinning.
Bernadette led them through the village, avoiding the other residents, and together they made their way into the jungle of the island. Olgilvie would point out the creatures who made the place their home with wide gestures and she would nod in response. He was enjoying himself. This place was paradise to him and he never wanted to leave. He waved to the monkeys that clambered up massive tree trunks and stuck his tongue out at the the large insects that would make passes at them.
The further they walked, however, the more tired Olgilvie became and soon his stomach began to growl. He hunched forward to try and silence the sound but to no avail. His mother heard it anyway.
"Soon, sweetheart," she told him.
He wondered how long "soon" would take. Out of sight and ahead of them he could hear what sounded like roaring and he hoped it was something nice and not a monster. If it was a monster then he at least hoped that "soon" would happen before they reached whatever was making that sound.
Within a few minutes, though, it was revealed to him that it was in fact not a monster, but water. Tons and tons of water in what his mother called a "river". It was scary looking with how fast it moved and he backed away from the edge so he couldn't fall in.
Bernie, seeing his fright, easily picked him up into her arms. From his new height and the confidence given to him from his mother's hold, he began to gesture to the river to show his excitement to her.
"Yes, I see it, sweetheart," she said as she began to rock side-to-side, watching as her son laid his head on her shoulder.
Carefully she began to step closer to the river bank.
Olgilvie, having almost fallen asleep on his mother, didn't realize he was at the edge of the water until he was being held out at arm's length over the rapids.
He stared at his mother.
She stared back with empty eyes.
Without a word, she threw him into the water.
You are a priceless gem. A unique being who deserves to show off how you shine.
Don't let cynical criticism and other's jealousy weigh you down. You're more than the words they feed you and even the words you may throw at yourself.
You are loved. You a cherished. You are precious.
So shine, gem, shine.
~Bless, Alpha.