Disclaimer: S.E. Hinton owns The Outsiders. Jason Aldean owns "Got What I Got."
You're perfect for me
Everything I'll ever need
November 20, 1971
Ella sat on the fence, leisurely watching Dallas come trotting back on one of the horses Buck had gotten a few days earlier. He was a Thoroughbred which Ella named Storm, because his fur was a white-gray color, and he had a long zig-zag like mark on his forehead, which reminded the young woman of a lightning bolt. Storm had seemed to take a liking to Ella, but he also liked Dallas. In some way, Ella always thought that Dallas could speak horse. Though he was hot-tempered and sporadic, there was just something about his demeanor that reminded her of a wild Mustang. Truthfully, she could see him doing a job like this for the rest of his life—it was where he was the most calm, the most at ease. For Ella, she enjoyed the peacefulness of the ranch, liked the fact that she could work early in the morning and have the rest of her day free . . . but she couldn't imagine doing it forever.
Dallas brought Storm to a stop in front of her, his eyes not as icy as they usually were. "Want a lift?" he asked, his expression smooth of any emotion.
It had been a while since Ella had went riding, and right then, she figured it wouldn't hurt. Besides, she and Dallas were done with work, so they weren't really doing anything. She eyed the darkening clouds overhead; it was going to storm later in the afternoon. Her eyes met Dallas's, and she half-smiled as he offered her his hand, helping her hoist herself up to sit in front of him. His arms rested on either side of her, her back slightly pressing against his chest. They started out in a slow walk, and Ella found herself relaxing as they ventured out into the field, her eyes closing for a moment as she allowed herself to absorb as much of this moment that she could.
Behind her, she could hear Dallas breathing, and for a minute, it relaxed her. Glory, but it had been some time since she had felt like this, she thought . . . as though she were almost at peace. A thought crossed her mind then, and she recalled the first time she and Dallas had ridden a horse together. It caused her lips to curve upward as she reminisced about those days, her gaze distant. Things had been so different back then, and just thinking about it made the memories feel almost surreal. A low breath escaped her mouth as she looked out at the field in front of herself—it seemed to go on and on. Ella wished that it did, wished that she could just keep moving forward for a while with nowhere to stop, with no destination in mind. Her eyes shifted to where Dallas was holding the reigns, and she smiled, spreading her arms out wide, the slight breeze brushing against her face.
Dallas watched her for a second, but he didn't say anything. There were some things about Ella that he had quit questioning long ago. She had always been a dope, something that he figured would stick with her the rest of her life.
"Remember the first time we went riding together?" she asked, breaking the silence.
He did. "Not really."
"I do," she murmured, relaxing her arms. "I thought you were going to run me over at first."
An impish grin crossed his lips. "I should have."
Ella chuckled. "You wouldn't have."
Maybe she was right, and maybe she wasn't, he thought. There were some things that he had allowed to slip his mind, some things that he had tried not to think about anymore. He could remember desperately trying to erase Ella Mitchell from his thoughts permanently, only to realize that he was unable to. He cared about her, that much was true, but he knew that he would never be able to stay fully committed to her, or give her the things that she needed. Honestly, Ella never asked for much, and it wasn't money or anything that she needed, either. No. It was the things that he didn't know how to give, because he really didn't know how to receive them. In some way, he had always known that, but Ella seemed to make him understand it, too.
She would always deserve better, not that he would ever admit that to her. Maybe he had in some way, but he wouldn't directly say it to her. That shit was too deep for him, and he wasn't about to even attempt to have that conversation with her.
He decided to change the subject, talk about something else. "What's goin' on with this bakery of yours?"
Ella licked her lips. "Mary is helping me out with a lot of the legalities." She made a sound like a low sigh. "We found a building that would be suitable for the business, so Mary got a price on it, but she thinks she can get it lower."
Dallas frowned. "Mary's helping you?"
A nod. "Yeah, she suggested that we work as partners, even though it's my business."
"Hope you made that understood," came the harsh response, and Ella felt herself becoming rigid. But Dallas merely continued on, oblivious to her oncoming discomfort. "Last thing you need is to find yourself fucked over for somethin' you didn't know about."
"Mary wouldn't do that, Dallas," she bit out. "She wants to help me, not take over the entire thing for herself." She tossed her hands up dramatically. "What would she even gain from it that she doesn't have already? I mean, she's already giving up traveling to build a life with Soda here, so it's not like she's going to run out and leave everything on me. She'll be here . . . and she's both dependable and reliable."
The blond's lips pressed together. "My, my, my . . ." he drawled. "You've certainly got this all sorted out, don't you, dollface?"
"Well, I'm real serious about it," came the firm quip. "If you came around a little more, you would know that."
Dallas pulled Storm into a sharp stop, causing Ella to jerk forward a little. "The fuck is that supposed to mean?" he asked, a bitter sound in his voice.
Ella couldn't see his face, but she imagined that dangerous look forming in his eyes. "Nothing," she replied quietly. "I just wish that you did come around more . . ."
The last part was said so quietly that Dallas had to lean ahead just to be sure that he had heard her correctly. It had been quite some time since he and Ella had one of these conversations with each other, and quite truthfully, Dallas didn't miss them. He came back to town when he felt like it, when it was on his terms and nobody else's. He thought that Ella would understand that by now, but apparently, she hadn't—and he didn't know why in the fuck she was unable to grasp that he did things his own way without the influence of anyone else. Dammit.
"Well," he began with a scoff, "quit wishin', because I don't have any intentions of goin' back there until I'm damn good and ready . . . if ever . . ."
Ella's nostrils flared, but she remained quiet as Dallas turned Storm around and led him back to the stables. The last thing she wanted was for him to get pissed off enough that he threw her off and left her out on the trail to walk back. She didn't doubt that he would, either.
The walk back was silent, and once they reached the stables, Ella practically jumped down without so much as giving Dallas a warning that she was about to do so. She landed flat on her feet, but the impact against her ankles was sharp as she hit the ground, her teeth grinding together. She crossed her arms as she followed Dallas inside the building, making sure that everything was where it was supposed to be, so Buck didn't bitch at them later. Ella had gotten mighty sick of his annoying attitude, as if everything had to be perfect, or else . . .
She tossed a spare brush into one of the buckets, before making her way out. However, before she reached the entrance, a hand gripped her arm and pulled her back. Jerking around, she came face to face with Dallas, who was looking down his nose at her with an unreadable expression. She expected him to say something drastic, or . . . do something just to get under her skin and piss her off, only he didn't. Instead, he released her arm, noticing the look in her eyes, and casually reached into her jacket pocket to pull out the apple she had put in there earlier.
"Almost forgot to give Storm his treat," he said, turning to feed the horse.
Ella watched him, a heavy feeling suddenly overwhelming her. She stood there as Storm finished the apple, before Dallas turned back to face her, his stare void of emotion. Why she stayed, she wasn't sure, and why she made the move to grab him and kiss him, she didn't know. He didn't even bat an eye as she did so, simply responding with the same amount of energy. No, they weren't together, but in some way, Ella figured that they were.
She didn't stop him as he walked her backward, her back hitting the wall behind them, before they both found themselves in the pile of straw on the ground near the back stall. Her arms instinctively wrapped around him as she pulled him closer, his lips on hers as her eyes slipped closed . . .
In an area like the one they lived, it was common for people to run into folks they knew, especially on a Saturday morning at the market. By now, most everyone from her past that were still lingering in the area knew that Melody Cannon was back . . . not to mention, that she was dating Darry Curtis. Still, she had never expected to run into the likes of Two-Bit Mathews, a surprise look of his own blanketing his face. Well, she thought, the guy was human, and he had just as much right to use the store as she did. She had no dislike toward him at all. Honestly, she had always liked Two-Bit, thought that he was a comical guy, although she never really trusted him, because of his drinking.
Those days were long gone now, though, and Melody didn't really know Two-Bit anymore. From what she did know, he had made out alright for himself. She had always thought that he was smart, though he never really cared to try in school when she was there. Darry had told her that with the help of Ponyboy, Two-Bit had been able to finally graduate . . . and then he had gotten himself a full time job doing custodial work. That, however, was after an incident that had changed him dramatically. When Melody inquired, Darry only lightly brushed over it, and she figured that it was something he'd rather forget about than bring up as though it were a casual thing to discuss.
But Two-Bit was standing in front of her, a basket in hand with a few groceries in it. Melody herself was pushing a cart, and she had come to a short stop when Two-Bit rounded the corner into the aisle she was leaving, a grin forming across his lips.
"Melody Cannon," he said in greeting. "Fancy meeting you here."
Still the same old Two-Bit Mathews, Melody thought, but smiled anyway. "I could say the same. How are you, Two-Bit?"
"Just peachy," he replied, eyeing the items in her cart. "You plannin' on feeding the army?"
She laughed lightly. "Well, if you consider Darry to be an army by himself, I guess I am." She watched his expression shift for a second, before she continued. "He's coming to my house for dinner tonight, and I was at a loss for ideas . . ."
"Huh," Two-Bit responded. "I'm sure Darry will like anything you cook up." He raised his brows as he looked at her. "He ain't much of a picky guy when it comes to food."
Melody shrugged. "That's the thing," she admitted. "We've spent more time eating out at restaurants and bars, except for that night he invited me to his place, and I still have no idea what he really likes . . . aside from burgers, egg and tomato sandwiches, and chicken."
Two-Bit appeared thoughtful for a moment. He knew his buddy pretty well, and there was one thing he knew Darry loved when it came to food. Actually, all of the Curtis brothers loved it, and Two-Bit had to admit that Mrs. Curtis had been one helluva cook—maybe better this his own old lady. Then again, Mrs. Mathews never really spent a whole lot of time in the kitchen. When she did, though, she could cook up a decent meal, though it wasn't really her forte.
"Try pasta," he recommended, voice sincere. "One thing I know is that Darry loves spaghetti with meat sauce. And if you can't beat that . . . well, you'll have to pick up burgers from the diner."
"Pasta," Melody repeated, and nodded. "I can work with that."
A grin. "I'm sure you can, doll."
She shifted to one side, her eyes sparking a bit. "Is there anything else you can give me pointers about, or should he just keep me guessing?"
Two-Bit wasn't sure what to make of Melody. He thought she was okay, and he figured that she really had to be into Darry to take what he liked and wanted into consideration. For being together for the past several weeks, Two-Bit thought it was rather intriguing that she was still trying this hard to impress him—not that he thought it was a big deal or anything like that. No, he just never imagined Melody to be the kind of gal to settle down, especially with a guy like Darry. It wasn't that he thought she wasn't good enough for him, either, but the two of them together seemed . . . well, it seemed odd. They were two different people, or at least, Two-Bit had always seen them that way.
Huh, time really did change things, didn't it?
Still, he figured offering a few pointers wouldn't hurt, and he watched as Melody's mouth curved up into a genuine smile, her eyes brightening as he told her a few things about Darry. The rest was up to her to figure out for herself.
Mary enjoyed the evenings when Soda and her were together. It was too cold to eat outside or anything like that, so they were at Mary's house, which was located closer to Ella's old neighborhood, but in a slightly better area. Where Ella's old house was located used to be considered the lower end of the middle class neighborhood, and where Mary lived currently was what the kids used to refer to as the higher class developments, though her neighborhood was closer to Ella's. She remembered her friend once telling her that her mother had been real lucky to get their house when she did, or they would have been closer to the bad section of town. Still, Mary thought that where she lived now was a nice area, and besides, she didn't want to flaunt herself or anything, so she had decided on a small and quaint little house in a small neighborhood with three bedrooms and two bathrooms. It was more than enough for her, especially since she only kept necessities from Aunt Vera.
Also, since she had hardly ever been home, Mary figured that it really didn't matter. Her neighbors were nice enough, she supposed, although it wasn't a tight-knit block or anything like that. She was surrounded mostly by older people anyway, and Soda once joked that she was the youngest person on the block by far.
Still, it was a frigid night for November, and Soda and Mary had decided to just stay in. He didn't work Sundays, so usually, he would spend Saturday nights with her. Besides, Darry was at Melody's for dinner, and Ponyboy, Ella, and Two-Bit had decided to go bowling. Mary wasn't sure if Steve and Evie were meeting them or not—probably not. It wasn't like they could usually all get together anyway, especially with their schedules, but when they could, they made plans. Mary thought that she had missed out on a lot of those times being away and all, but she was able to live them through Soda's stories—she had kept all of his letters.
"Can you believe Steve and Evie will be married in a couple of weeks?" she asked, the thought of it still surprising to her.
Soda made a face. "Not really," he admitted. "Feels like this year went awfully quick, you know?"
She nodded in agreement. "I'll say." And then she took a seat beside him on the couch, his arm draping around her shoulders as she leaned into his side. "I've been thinking . . ." she began, tilting her head a little so that she could look up at him. "With Ella and I working together as business partners . . . I'm not going to travel anymore."
The news came as a mild shock to him. He knew that Ella was trying to open her own bakery in town, and that Mary had offered to help her out with it—Mary had told him a few weeks back. She had never bothered to mention anything about her future traveling plans, though, and he had never brought them up to her. He usually didn't, instead letting her be the one to just surprise him. He figured that she would probably continue doing it come some time the following year, but to hear her say that she wasn't going to travel anymore shook him a bit.
"How come?" he asked, his gaze meeting hers. "I mean, I get that it would be a lot with the business, but . . . I thought that's what—"
Mary quickly cut him off, though her voice was soft. "It is, but, Soda . . ." She sat up then, turning to face him so that they were eye level. "I want to stay here, I want to be home." A pause. "I want to build a life together with you."
Soda had never expected her to say those words. Hell, he wanted to build a life with her, too, wanted to live out their lives together. It had been a thought on his own mind for quite some time, but he always thought that letting Mary do as she pleased without getting in her way would be beneficial for the both of them. He supposed that in the long run it was, but Mary had spent more time away than she did at home . . . and he knew from experience how tiresome that could become. Having volunteered to help Ella out with her bakery was going to be a lot of work, too. Soda could understand that, but it made him more flattered to know that she really just wanted to be with him, like he wanted to be with her.
He told himself not to be a sap, but right then, he couldn't help himself. "Mary," he began, but her lips suddenly met his, and he pulled her closer to him, his arms snaking around her middle. Golly, but he sure loved her . . . and it seemed to grow deeper with each passing moment. Before he could even think about the next words out of his mouth, he spoke them, his tone firm but sincere. "Marry me."
The more that Ponyboy learned about Lorraine, the more he liked her. They seemingly had a lot in common, or at least it sure felt like they did. They liked the same books and the same movies, and hell, they were even into the same kind of music, except Lorraine was really into Fleetwood Mac. Ponyboy thought that they were okay, but he dug different music, like Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young. Other than that, their preferences mostly aligned. In some way, Lorraine was almost like a replica of him, only the female version, and he found himself more and more intrigued by her.
They had gone on a few outings, getting dinner a few times, or just taking a walk here and there. Both of them enjoyed the others company well enough, and while Ponyboy was seriously considering on asking Lorraine to go steady, he didn't want to rush anything, or possibly scare her off. Well, they had been dating for the past couple of weeks, and Lorraine had been the one to ask him out after their first date, which he thought had gone pretty well. Still, he didn't want to come off as pushy, and remembering his last relationship with Julia, he didn't just want to jump right into it.
Lorraine was calm and laid back, not real loud or too outgoing. He learned that Tina was her older cousin, and that Lorraine had been coaxed by her to come to Benny's party that night weeks back. Ponyboy had to admit that he would never believe that Lorraine and Tina were even half related—they were too very different people.
Still, things had gotten pretty busy since he had started interning at the high school, and trying to see Lorraine between school, studies, and work was rough. He made the time when he could, and thankfully, Lorraine had been incredibly understanding. She was only eighteen—two years younger than him—and it was her first year at the university. She was planning on getting as much out of her studies that she could, even adding a few classes to her already packed schedule for next semester. To be honest, Ponyboy was impressed, but he thought she might be going a little overboard, too. Then again, he knew how much it meant to her to become a nurse, as well as how passionate she was about it. Her determination was one of the things that he truly admired about her, and he figured that one day, she was going to make one helluva nurse.
"I wish I was able to come visit you," Lorraine spoke, her shoulders slightly slumped forward. "I feel bad that you have to be the one always coming out to get me."
Ponyboy shook his head in a dismissive manner. "Don't worry about it," he said in a reassuring voice, his gaze on her. "Believe me, I understand."
She offered him a small smile. "I know, and I appreciate it." A sigh. "I just feel bad sometimes, you know?" Her lips twitched. "One day, when I have enough money saved up, I'll be able to get my own car and won't have to worry about sharing with my sister."
He chuckled in spite of her words. "I know that feeling," he admitted. "Both of my brothers had to share one truck, and then I had to share with my oldest brother. A couple of years ago, my one brother's best buddy let me use his truck to drive from home to the university, because it was getting difficult trying to catch a ride home for the weekends." He took a sip of his Pepsi. "Eventually, I was able to save up enough money to get my own truck, and my brothers and I fixed her up."
Boy howdy, could he remember that day with innate clarity. Since Darry had been using the truck along with Soda, Ponyboy had started saving every scrap of money he made . . . both from his novel sales and from working during the Summer with Dallas and Ella at the ranch. There was also some money he hadn't touched from when he had worked at the bowling alley. Glory, that felt like ages ago. Still, Soda had met a guy at the station who was selling an old truck, and a day later saw the three of them taking a trip to the guy's house to take it off his hands. It was in fairly decent shape . . . for the most part. They had spent a good few days after that fixing some minor things, before Ponyboy drove it back to the university. He had to admit that he was awfully proud of himself for being able to buy his own vehicle; he never thought it was fair having to rely on his friends for rides back and forth.
"I've been saving money from babysitting," Lorraine replied, somewhat sheepishly. "Also from when I worked as a lifeguard." A light tint coated her cheeks. "It's hard now juggling work, especially with the extra classes coming up."
"You'll be fine," Ponyboy said, attempting to reassure her.
Lorraine only half-smiled. "Thanks. It's going to be a lot, but I think I can handle it."
"Well, if you ever need help with anything, you know where to find me," came the response, and even though he wasn't feeling flustered or anything, Ponyboy could feel his face getting hot. "I mean, I may not know much about the medical field, but I'm sure I could learn."
She was staring at him with an incredulous look, although she wasn't put-off by his offer. In fact, she was more surprised than ever. Ponyboy was awfully sweet, and she really, really liked him. She was certain that he liked her as well, and she was glad that they had bumped into each other that one day in the library. Before she was able to process her next move, she leaned forward, pressing her lips against his very lightly. Truthfully, Lorraine didn't have much experience in the dating field, never before having a boyfriend. She had only gone on a few dates with some guys that her friends had set her up with, but she had always invested herself in her studies and helping her family out financially in any way that she was able to.
Her internal question of Ponyboy liking her was answered when he kissed her back, his hand reaching up to gently cup her face. When they pulled apart after a few seconds, Lorraine found herself chuckling a little, before she took his hand in hers, a grin stretching about her mouth. Ponyboy was grinning back at her, his hand squeezing hers as they continued their walk.
"I might actually take you up on that offer," she said, cocking an eyebrow as she glanced up at him.
Though he wouldn't say it out loud, Ponyboy was feeling more happy than he had been in weeks, but he wanted to play it cool. He definitely didn't have any qualms in helping her out if she needed, and he figured he could make time in his schedule to do so. It was then that he realized that since he had been with Lorraine, he had been more upbeat and chipper than usual, and it was a feeling he didn't want to leave any time too soon.
There was a spark in his eyes, his stomach flipping with excitement. "I'm hoping that you will."
When I got what I got I don't miss what I had
The old me before you belongs to the past
A lot happening here, huh? ;)
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