By Amai
Disclaimer- Digimon and all it's characters are not copyright me, but copyright Toei Animation/Bandai (there probably are others, but I can't remember offhand). I wish they were, but sadly, not all wishes come true. The only thing that's copyright me is this fanfic, so no stealing, kiddies.
Author's Notes- Angsty! That's all I can really say for this...I'm tired, and well...my mind isn't really working well. Lot's of tears and realization and anger in this, people! And still continuing the weird Takeru/Daisuke/Ken triangle..sort of..if only Daisuke was in the right mental state to pick one, eh? Well you can't get what you want every day, now can you? Oh, by the way..before I forget, I've decided that I want to enter this in Cnythia's Kensuke (or Shounen-Ai) contest..but because of the triangle, I'm not sure if I can. If you're reading this, Cnythia, please reply to me! Okay..with that said, continue on! Please Read and Review as always!
"Daisuke! Daisuke, come back!", Takeru ran after the boy, out of the house. Daisuke's eyes had been full of pure resentment as he had screamed at Takeru just before. He didn't know what to think...someone telling you that you can't love them wasn't something that usually happened everyday. He just ran after Daisuke, to calm him down before he did something drastic in his state.
What had happened to him....?
Daisuke began to slow down. He couldn't see Takeru and he was glad. Why didn't he see that before...? He was too blinded with his fake crush on Hikari to even notice what Takeru had felt for him. And it made him sick.
"It was better when everyone just hated me...or at least, pretended to..", he said, his voice shaking with more tears. He was completely lost in the world....and right now, love was the last thing he needed. But he knew he needed it....and it was killing him.
"My rose...you're wasting time pitying yourself.", Daisuke's head snapped to the voice. He knew from the start who it was. His life...his water...his poison.
Ken.
"Why the fuck are you doing this to me....?", Daisuke whispered, looking at his image. His answer was yet another kiss, racking his soul some more. It wasn't right...It wasn't right....but then, how come it felt so right?!
"Because, dear Daisuke..I...", he hesitated, second thinking something to Daisuke's own surprise. He continued, "I need you..."
"Get away from me!"
"You need me...as much as you deny it. My reluctant rose...", he said dryly, looking into Daisuke's wide chocolate eyes. "Come to your garden."
Daisuke wanted to break away and run from him...
...but he couldn't...
..and at the same time he wanted to run to him...
Love. Such a fickle emotion that people throw around like it's nothing. But they don't see the connection to themselves and it....and don't realize how unpredictable it can be. When a flower rejects its food, it starts to die. It doesn't have a choice in that...but there is a possibility that it can retrieve different water from another source. A source that gives it hope.
Hope...
"Never!", Daisuke screamed and ran. He didn't know where he was going, nor did he really care. He just wanted to get away from the love, or need, or want...whatever the hell it was.
Ken gave a small smirk, standing still and feeling the area, "No obstacles will be in my way..."
—
Takeru had searched all over town for Daisuke. The boy was gone...and something told him that he wasn't alone in his search for the boy of courage and friendship. And something else told him that this other person was linked to Daisuke's distraught behavior..
"Daisuke! Daisuke!", he called again in vain.
I hate you...
Takeru froze in his footsteps. It was Daisuke's voice....in his mind? Full out hate and sorrow. Hearing the tone of his voice began to hurt Takeru...burn his heart. No, he was just hearing things, that was it. He continued his searching.
Damn you! Don't you know when the fuck to leave me alone!
"Daisuke....?"
Takeru....don't hurt me anymore...
"But Daisuke-chan! I'm not hurting you! Why are you so afraid..?", Takeru's voice shook with his own fear. He was afraid of what Daisuke was saying...it sounded so different. Takeru wouldn't do anything to hurt Daisuke, so why was Daisuke so hurt by him now..?
If you're not hurting me, then why do I feel so sick inside...every time you search for me, Takeru..I hurt more...I don't want your love, I don't need it..
"But Daisuke-cha-"
Don't. Don't call me that...just go away. I hate you...I HATE YOU!
"Fine...Daisuke..I'll leave you. But I...", Takeru cut himself off before he hurt the boy more. He wanted to say it, say the three words the had been meaning to say before it was too late, but now..now it really was too late. His heart began to crack, it had been cracking with every word Daisuke had said now. What had he done wrong...?
"I don't care, I'll figure out what's wrong with you somehow Daisuke...", Takeru said, tears slowly growing in his eyes as he walked away. He would stay true to his words. Something wasn't right about that conversation....something. But why did it hurt so much...?
Something laughed as the blonde boy walked back in pure sadness. Ken was partly satified. Takeru was out of his way...for now. But Daisuke would be a problem. He loved..no, needed both of them right now.
"What a fool. He really believed that Daisuke was talking to him like that. Hmm....well, I know for a fact that my rose isn't as gullible as...him...", Ken said "him" with dripping malice. In reality, he had no idea why he got so angry whenever someone else became intimate with Daisuke. Or..maybe he just didn't want to think about it.
Osamu's words were becoming very clear, but Ken didn't want to listen. He didn't love anyone!
But, did that really make sense? In life, yes...the flower needs the water. But does the water need the flower? Ken shook, finding himself realizing this.
......You're falling prey to your own obsession, Ken.....
.....It seems to me that you're trying to fool yourself in self-protection.....
......I feel some jealousy in you....
....What if Daisuke were to be taken away from you? What would you do.....?
Ken felt his calm and collected presence waver as he dropped to his knees, holding his head in a maddening rage. All Osamu's thoughts were flooding back to his head....mocking him in their trueness...
"You're not right!", he roared, clutching the grass on the ground in fury.
You try to look, but you can't to see,
You're blinded with my fantasy,
You try in vain to shun your eyes,
You're here to worship the one you despise.
You're eyes are closed from the thought.
Of love which makes your soul distraught,
Refusing to believe it might be true,
That he is right, and wrong are you.
You yearned for love,
And when you retrieved it,
It burned you soul,
Making you know you were not fit.
Ken couldn't be wrong...? Love hurt too much to fall into it's deathly grasp..he was a genius! He knew how to avoid it...he knew....
Love exists in one's mind,
Don't deny it's existence,
It will come at you fast,
With a raging persistence.
With every thought, Ken realized that Osamu was forcing this realization into his soul. With every thought, he was being buried in his own lies. With every thought he became more confused, and less knowing...
With every thought, his jealousy grew.
For some reason, Osamu's thoughts began to retreat as Ken's jealousy grew. But it was already too late...the effect was starting.
"Sir? Are you alright?", a voice prodded the boy on the ground. He didn't bother looking up, yet began to run, run in search of his flower...that he had now realized he loved.
Again, nothing would get in the way of Ichijouji Ken.