A/N: None of these characters belong to me. They belong to Ms. Rowling. Please read and review. Thanks.
Fidelius Betrayed
Part Four: Freedom and Memories
By: WeasleyTwin2
A tortured soul
A wound unhealing
No regrets or promises
The past is gone
But you can still be free
If time will set you free
You Can Still Be Free
Savage Garden
This shattered dream you cannot justify
Invincible
Pat Benatar
Somewhere…
We'll find a new way of living,
We'll find a way of forgiving
Somewhere…
Somewhere
From the musical: West Side Story
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A noise quite nearby awoke me the next morning. I jerked instantly awake and found myself staring at a squirrel that was chattering away at me and flipping his bushy tail. I was surprised that I could understand what he was saying. Apparently I had protected him from predators by sleeping under his tree and he was thanking me. I nodded my head in reply and he hurried away. A few minuets later, just as I was about to leave, he returned with a small pile of nuts and berries, which he said, were for the brave man/dog. I changed into a man and I thanked him as best I could. I ate the lot. for I suddenly found that I was ravenous. It was the first real meal I had eaten in years and I enjoyed the different flavors and textures. I turned to thank him again but he had vanished back to wherever he had come from.
"Thank you!" I called out and I thought that I heard a chattering high above me as if the squirrel was saying "your welcome" but I could no longer understand his words.
I transformed myself back into a dog and began to make my way north toward Hogwarts and whatever awaited me there. It was so good to be free and my spirits began to soar. I began to run as fast as my legs would carry me. It felt good to feel the sunlight on my face and to smell the myriad of scents that came to me. No sunlight ever pierced the glum of Azkaban and the only smells there were of things wasting away. I took a deep breath of fresh air and then I took another. For a moment I was the same man I had been before the deaths of Harry's parents. I ran through the fields just for the sheer joy of running, happy memories flooding through me. My friends and I had run together in fields and woods like these when we were students. I felt as if the other three were running beside me again. Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs on the prowl once more after so many long years apart. It seemed like we were together again. I saw in my mind's eye the pranks we had pulled as students and heard our laughter as each prank was talked about. We had been so carefree, totally unconcerned about the punishment we would receive if we were caught. We simply lived for the moment. Carpe diem was our motto then: Seize the day.
The pranks that we pulled off were all brilliant. James planned most of them but I was usually the one to pull them off. These pranks were nearly always team efforts but one of the best ones was planned and executed by me and me alone. One day, after a particularly nasty run in with some Slytherins who were mad because Gryffindor had managed to beat them at Quidditch, I decided to see how the Slytherins would feel if Gryffindor borrowed their house banner for a while. James told me that I shouldn't but I was angry and I guess I wanted revenge. James even threatened to take house points away "if" he caught me anywhere near the Slytherin Common Room or if the saw me with their banner, all the while rummaging in his trunk for the invisibility cloak to lend me with a huge grin on his face. I merely nodded and a few days later I wrapped the cloak around myself and slipped out into the night. After much thought, I decided to use a newly discovered passage that I had discovered that led straight to the Slytherin Common Room. I slipped through the entrance just as the last Slytherin was making his way to the dormitories and bed. Quickly and silently I crossed the room and grabbed the green banner emblazoned with the silver serpent and backed toward the tunnel I had used, knowing that I would not be able to use it to get back to Gryffindor Tower because it was a one way tunnel. I would have to wait for a Slytherin to let me out.
Several hours later one of the Slytherins sleepily entered the common room to sit in one of the chairs there. Quietly and still invisible I snuck up on them and chanted a charm that would cause them to tell me the Slytherin password, which I had heard you needed to say before the hidden door would open. I sent the girl back to her bed and using the stolen password pureblood I left the Slytherin Common Room chortling.
I walked down the dungeon corridor and stopped at one of the classrooms to catch my breath, then I quickly and quietly made my way back to the Gryffindor Common Room where I set about altering the Slytherin banner. The coiled serpent became a cringing seven- headed serpent, one head each for the Slytherin Quidditch team. Before it towered a seven-headed Gryffindor lion with the golden snitch firmly grasped in its paws. The lion of Gryffindor was standing on the serpent of Slytherin's tail. The words that once graced the banner now read."The Slytherin team is a bunch of LOSERS who all need extra arms attached in order to beat Gryffindor at Quidditch. In fact while you're at the store getting extra arms maybe you should buy your Seeker extra eyes too. He sure could use them since he can't see worth a darn"
By the way, in case you didn't already know this:
GRYFFINDOR RULES AND SLYTHERIN DROOLS!!!!!!!!!!
I showed it to the others the next morning and I teased James, telling him he should turn me in for defacing school property but he just laughed and the other approved of the improvement I had made to the banner on the spot. We went down to breakfast earlier then usual to set up the banner where everyone would be sure to see it at the right time then we left the Great Hall and reentered it sometime later so that no one would immediately suspect us.
"They'll know it was us, though " said Peter.
"Of course they will but it's no good hanging around at the scene of the crime," said Remus, a wise sage look on his face.
"Oh yes, oh wise one! Do you know the meaning of life, oh great bearded prophet?" said James with a laugh as Remus tried to look wise.
Remus nodded and looked down his nose at all of us and said: "Yes I do in fact know the meaning of life and it is this…
He paused several minuets for dramatic effect and then he went on: " Never tickle a sleeping dragon."
Remus grinned and we all laughed as we sat down at the Gryffindor table. The Slytherin's were in a foul mood, of course they almost always were, but this time it was because someone had stolen their banner and they had no idea how it had been done. As soon as one of the Slytherins said the words "house banner" loud enough it appeared as if out of thin air. It unrolled itself and began to flash its message. Soon the whole hall was rolling on the floor with laughter, except for the Slytherins who were shouting loudly at the Gryffindors. After the hall had fallen silent the Slytherins ground their teeth in fury and swore they get even.
I grinned at the memory but then sobered quickly for I had reached more populated areas now. I slowed from a run to a walk and then stopped to rest once more. Above me I saw a Muggle street sign, which read Magnolia Cresent.
"That's near where Harry would be living if his Muggle uncle and aunt hadn't moved in the last twelve years." I thought to myself, as an overwhelming urge to see Harry flooded through me.
Lily had told me where her sister lived in case anything ever happened to them and I needed somewhere to leave Harry. I was glad now that she had told me of them and where they lived even though she'd advised me never to visit them.
"It's too dangerous for you here. You really should move on," my mind advised me but I ignored it completely as the need to see Harry overwhelmed me.
Night had fallen and I decided, perhaps a bit unwisely, to stay near here for a bit hoping to catch a glimpse of James and Lily's son before heading north myself. I settled down between the garage and house to rest, my long journey had tired me out. I was just about to fall asleep when I heard the sound of a trunk being pushed along the ground by someone. I jumped up at the sound but made no move that might give me away. I knew the Ministry of Magic was searching for me. Soon the trunk came into view and then the person pushing it. I began to tremble with fear. Was I seeing a ghost? The man… no boy before me looked so much like James that for a moment I was confused. He had James' wild black hair and his body language was much the same as James' was when he was extremely angry about something. He kicked the trunk and muttered as he opened the truck to rummage around in it for something. Then he looked up and ran a hand through his hair. It was then that I realized that it wasn't James. I'd recognized the scar, though it had been twelve years since I had seen it last. It was Harry standing before me not his father. I marveled at how much they looked alike. I, who had been James best friend, would have been hard pressed to tell the difference between them. The only difference between then that I could see was the scar that Harry had. Without realizing I was doing it, I crept closer and continued to stare at him. I must have stared too long though for suddenly I heard Harry mutter "lumos" with his wand pointed right at me. For a moment I panicked then I began to slowly back away. Harry's eyes widened and I noticed for the first time that there was another feature that they did not share.
"He's got Lily's eyes," I thought as the light from his wand shone down on me.
Harry's bright green eyes widened at the sight of me and he cried out. Then, with his wand arm outstretched, he fell landing hard on the ground. I heard the arrival of the knight bus, three loud booms. While Harry was distracted by it I fled down the street and out of sight thinking his reaction was because he knew who I was. I knew he would be safe on the knight bus. The driver was an old friend of mine from my student days and so I had no fear for Harry's safety. They would see to it that he got wherever he was going. I continued northward, though more slowly then before because of being in populated areas. I decided, against my better judgment, to return to my human form for a bit. A great black dog was more visible in large cities then one man would be or so I hoped.
As I traveled city-to-city, ever northward, I thought about Harry's reaction to me. Did he know I was an animagus? Had anyone ever told him about me? Did he think I was coming after him, the one person in the world I would never hurt? Had he been told that I had been the one who had caused the death of his parents? I had no real answers to these questions. Somehow I felt the need to know the answers though. I knew then that I would have to talk with Harry, get him alone somehow, to tell him the truth. I had to make him understand that I would never have betrayed my friends. It was important to me that, no matter what happened to me after I took care of Peter, someone would know the truth even it couldn't be used to save my life. I wanted Harry to be that person.
"Just let me find Peter. Let me get the opportunity to talk to Harry before it's all over. Just let me have a chance to end this torture."