A Sad Goodbye
Okay, here's part two. I'm not gonna re-cap, so just read part one, 'kay? I don't own these charcters or make a profit from them.
Part 2
The next hour was the most fun Chandler had had since he and Monica got divorced. He was playing on the living room floor with his son, (who had quickly grown to like Chandler, partly due to the huge chocolate ice cream he had fixed for his son), and the woman he had loved (still loved) more than any other in the whole world, was sat in the arm chair, watching them with a faint smile on her lips. Chandler's only regret was that her smile was so faint. Even after everything that had happened between them, he wanted her to be happy, God only knew why, but he did.
After an hour, Jake started to get tired and cranky. And after he had thrown his toy cars around (at Chandler, at Monica, at the walls, onto the balcony, everywhere) Monica decided he should have a bath and go to bed. Jake made noisy obejections to this, but ten minutes later, he had forgotten that he had claimed he didn't ever want a bath again, and had taken to splashing his parents with water. Actually, splashing wasn't the word, soaking was more like it.
Even though he was wet through, Chandler was still having fun. He played with the 'quacky ducks' with his son, and squirted him with a tiny water pistol. Jake had immediately grabbed this and started squirting his Mommy and Daddy, but all three of them had been laughing.
When the water was cold, Monica helped Jake stand up, and Chandler wrapped a towel around both of them.
"Ooh! Ooh! Jake, where's Mommy?" he teased. Monica wriggled out of the towel and somehow managed to wrap it around Jake without even putting him down.
"You know he'll never get to sleep," Monica reprimanded Chandler with a smile.
But she was wrong. As soon as Jake was dry, wearing his pajamas and tucked up in bed, he was asleep. Chandler had watched, but not joined in as Monica got Jake ready for bed. It was a whole ritual that was just between mother and son, and that didn't include him. But Chandler made sure he kissed Jake goodnight. Monica did the same, then they both went back into the livingroom, turning Jake's light off.
They both sat down and for a long moment, they just looked at each other.
"So how about that long story of yours?" Chandler asked, not liking the uncomfortable silence between them.
"Oh that," Monica said.
"Yeah, that. Come on, fess up, I wanna know," Chandler said with his most insnae grin ever. Monica couldn't help cracking up.
"Okay, okay. Right, after you and I broke up, I went to Boston. You already know that." Chandler nodded. "Well, I started dating this guy called Steve." She looked and Chandler and tried to read his expression, but couldn't. "There's not really much to tell, we went out for a while, and broke up yesterday."
"I'm sorry," he said. He wasn't really, well, he was sorry she was upset, but not sorry that she had broken up with Steve. Steve didn't belong with Monica, he did, Chandler.
"Thanks, even though I know you don't mean it," she said.
"I do. Well, sort of," he shrugged.
"Thanks."
"Mon, why are you really here?"
"Would it sound too weird if I said I didn't know?"
"A little, but I don't mind."
"Chandler, I know things have changed so much between us in the last eight months, but I have to say that I really do regret everything that's happened since we split up," Monica said sadly. Chandler was surprised.
"You do?" he asked. Why would she regret it? She'd been in a new place, with a new guy, who he was sure was wonderful in every way, and who could probably give her so much more than he ever could.
"Yeah. I really don't know what I was doing in Boston. Its not home, New York is. And I don't belong with Steve, he's a great guy, but he's not who I'm meant to be with," Monica said, struggling to find the right words. She was so nervous of telling Chandler all of this. What would he say? What if he didn't want her anymore?
"So who do you belong with? Who is the one who you're gonna spend the rest of your life with?" Chandler asked. He was praying to every God that existed or didn't exist, that she would say him.
"You," she said, not looking at him.
Chandler's prayers were answered! He grabbed Monica and hugged her so fiercely that when they broke apart a little, she was out of breath. Chandler looked at her for several long moments. He couldn't believe that life was so kind to him. He thought his life was over eight months ago when Monica left, and now here she was, back again, telling him he was the one she wanted to be with forever and ever. But something was wrong.
"Mon, why are you saying that?" Chandler asked. He hoped she wasn't just saying it because she was upset about breaking up with her boyfriend, but he had a feeling that she was.
"Because its right. Because I love you, and I always have," Monica answered quickly. She leaned forward slightly and kissed Chandler on the mouth. He pulled away. She looked at him in surprise, eyebrows raised, waiting for an explanation, one that Chandler didn't even have.
"Mon, I am so flattered that you came here, and that you said that, that you love me, and that I'm the one. But I think you're doing this for all the wrong reasons. I think you're doing this because you broke up with Steve and now you're scared you'll never find true love, never find the love that lasts forever, no matter what. That's why you came here. Because you know how crazy I was, and still am, about you, and you thought I'd believe this and say 'okay, lets get back together', because you're my best friend. But Mon, I can't say yes," Chandler said sadly. He couldn't look at Monica while he spoke, couldn't bear to see the hurt in her eyes.
"Why not?" she asked, tears running down her cheeks. She couldn't understand Chandler anymore. Of course, she had thought he might say no, but she had never really thought about how much it would hurt her if he did.
"Because what if I'm not the guy you're meant to be with? And you know, there's a good chance that I'm not. I mean, look at me, and look at you. Anyway, what if i'm not the guy, but we go ahead and get back together, and what if we eventually ended up getting married, then you found out that I wasn't the one? And what if you found the guy that is the one? And you felt you couldn't date him, because you had me. Mon, I love you too much to want to mess things up for you," Chandler said. It took a lot of courage for him to say that, and he hoped she'd appriciate it.
"Chandler, that's not going to happen, because you are the one I'm supposed to be with. We both know that. I love you," Monica said tearfully.
"If that's true, then why the hell did you break up with me? Why did you move to Boston without me. You took my son away from me, and even though I love you, even after all that's happened between us, I don't know if I'll ever be able to forgive you for that Monica," Chandler said. His voice was raised in anger, but he thought if he didn't get rid of her soon, he would just burst into tears.
"I don't know. Would you believe me if I said it was because I was afraid?"
"Of what? Me?" Chandler demanded harshly. Monica had to swallow hard to stop a fresh lot of tears when she heard him speaking to her like that, but she knew she deserved it.
"No, honey, not you. I would never be afraid of you, ever," she assured him, reaching out to touch his face. He pulled away before she even got close.
"Then what were you afraid of?" he asked in a gentler tone.
"I dunno." They started to lean closer together. Chandler thought maybe, just maybe, this was it, this was when they were going to make up. And he didn't really care whether it turned out to be a mistake or not, because right then, all he wanted was to hold her and kiss her and touch her. Monica held her breath. She desperately wanted to get back together with Chandler, and she hadn't been lying when she'd told him she didn't know why she'd gone to Boston. It wasn't as if they'd had a bad argument, or even a little one, she'd just felt like she had to go. But now, she felt like she wanted to be back in his arms.
They kissed, gently and slowly at first, then more deeply and passionately. Monica wondered why on earth she'd ever given this up, and Chandler wondered why he'd resisted getting it back. Still kissing her, Chandler tenderly scooped Monica into his arms. They went into Chandler's bedroom, which they had once shared, and would hopefully share again. As he laid Monica down gently on the bed, just before he climbed on top of her and started kissing her all over, Chandler whispered something to her.
"I love you," he whispered.
"I love you too," she whispered back.
THE END
Okay, I know, still no 'sad goodbye' thing, but I promise, I'm getting there. Part three may take a while, coz I have exams real soon, but I'll try and have it done within the next couple of weeks. Also, check out my website for more of my writing that isn't at FanFiction.net the address is http://members.xoom.com/Ezika/Ezika and please sign my SlamBook if you go there. Thanks. J