A Very Merry Hogwarts part:4
A/N: Ok….what to say, what to say. Well, part 4 (as everyone out there who can read and is wearing their glasses can tell J ). This part's pretty funny…and long. It's cold out there!! My my, on the last chapter I got 6 reviews…how nice. Special thanks to those who had some spirit in them and typed a few words in the box at the bottom of this page. Very cool peeps. You wanna be cool, review. On a happier note: HAPPY HOLIDAYS PEOPLE!! *giggles* I get really hyper and happy around this time of year. Anywhee, you guys don't need a weekly account of Emmy's personal life, so I'll get out of your face so you can start reading.
For some reason, there's a lot of Sirius in this part. Sumthin came over me, I guess.
Disclaimer: I don't own JP, LE, SB, RL, or PP *lol pee pee*. They belong to JKR. If you don't understand, that your problem, sweet cheeks. The songy thing "Movin' on up…! " (the rest is in the story) belongs to Kat, who has me stuck humming that. I own the plot and my ski jacket.
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Sirius Black was not one of the fans of Potions. Professor Lawrence was about as much fun as watching paint dry. Of course, what things went on there were quite the contrary. Peter, being the clumsy fool that he was, always managed to botch up something. And then the Slytherins were there, too. Today was no exception to interesting. About a half hour into class, they were learning how to make a liquifying potion, a smothered yelp from Severus Snape caught his attention. Sirius turned shades of purple as he watched what happened.
"YYYEEEOOWWWCCCHH!!" Snape leaped up, grabbing his butt in pain (A/N: I think I may get nightmares….*shudders*). A syringe was apparently stuck in a most uncomfortable position. Attached to the syringe was a piece of paper. It read:
Congratulations,
You have gotten your vaccination for a very rare and life threatening disease: Freakacitis. We are told by unknown sources that the Greasy-Haired species contract this. Our advice: WASH YOUR HAIR!! Come back soon for a booster shot! J
James, who was sitting next to him, grinned a wide grin.
"Padfoot, I haveta hand it to you. No one could have pulled this off."
"A Kodak moment. I wish I had a camera"
"Lily, dear, you need not worry. I, Sirius Black am always prepared." He whipped out a camera and began taking pictures at every angle. "Smashing, dahling! Give the camera what he like, you bad bad boy! Oh, yes!"
James had tears rolling down his cheeks by the time he was finished. "…You…gotta…get..th-those…developed!" He managed to croak out.
Professor Lawrence's reaction wasn't the same. "BLACK!!! DETENTION!!!"
"YAY! One more in my book! Looks, like I'm in the lead now, Prongs, my friend!!"
"MAKE THAT 2, BLACK!"
"Sirius, if I were you, I'd stop, because otherwise, you'll be coming back after you've graduated to serve all these. That is, if you graduate." Christine rolled her eyes, but a smile was playing about her lips.
"Don't worry. Dumbledore'd never fail me."
"I wouldn't be so optimistic."
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At that moment, a girl was racing across the fields outside of a small farming village, hoping that she'd live to see the Hogwarts castle again. It was faintly visible, etched into the horizon. I'll make it. I will.
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Later that night…
Sirius was in the hospital wing, tending to Snape, who was turning different colors every few minutes. The others were in the Astronomy tower, being Tuesday night. Professor Halliway came around, passing out star charts and giving directions.
"You are to map out the following, Sagittarius, the Big Dipper and Little Dipper, the North Star, Orion, Venus and at least one other constellation. Due Thursday, as soon as you walk into this class."
The whole class groaned.
RRRIIINNNGGG!
"Alright, off with the lot of you. "
James and Lily ran out of the room, eager to get as far away from the class as possible. As they came to the portrait hole, James and Lily ran right into a figure, whom they knew well.
"FELICITY?" Both screamed at the exact same time.
"Er, hi…I think."
AHHHH!
AHHHHHH!
"Why are y'all screa- AHHHHH!" Christine and Remus had just come around the corner.
Sirius was walking towards them, shooting daggers at the passerby. "Hi-AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
The Fat Lady was looking at them like they'd gone off their rocker. "What in the name of all that's good are you doing?"
It was James who answered it, like it was the simplest thing in to world.
"Screaming, naturally."
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The next day…
"Cuz I'm movin on up, to that big ass apartment in the skyyyy!" Sirius came down the stairs, singing happily. "YEAH! I'M MOVIN ON UP!!"
Professor McGonnagal was at the foot of the stairs, looking at him like he'd lost his mind completely. "Mr. Black, why are you singing at a time like this? You're going to wake the entire house!"
At that moment, the 6th year girl's dorm door opened and 3 sleepy faces poked out.
"Sirius….shut up."
"Yes, ma'am, Sergeant Evans."
''And…don't call me that. If you know what's good for you."
"Alright, cap'n!"
Christine sighed, " What a loon."
"I know, lil lady . Thank yer kindly fer remindin' meh!" He said in his best insane-cowboy accent.
SLAM!
"Sirius, please. Just go back to bed." McGonnagal shook her head, directing him towards the boy's staircase.
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Being Saturday, everyone was free to do what they wanted. Lily, Lissie, and Rissie were trying to persuade the boys into coming to Hogsmeade with them.
"Why would I want to come, just to watch you try on clothes and robes?" James shook his head firmly.
"Y'all can go get food!"
"Will you give us money?"
"No, Remus!"
"Juuuuuust a wonderin'"
"Sirius, we're not gonna look at robes and stuff! We can't wear lime green robes to class!"
"Well, then It'll be accessories!" Sirius pretended to look in a mirror, "Padfoot, does the blue butterfly look better? Or the pink one? I can't decide!"
"Shut up! I do not!"
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"Sirius, what looks better? The yellow dress robe or this one?" Felicity spun around, wearing a silver dress robe, her blond curls tumbling down her back. With a wide grin in her face.
"LISSIE!"
"Joking! Really, though. Do you like this one?"
"…I…yeah, I guess." He sighed.
"Really positive. Can I have something with a little more oomph to it?"
"Wonderful dahling. Ravishing."
Felicity smiled. "Thank you, dear!"
"Whatever."
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After the dress robes adventure, everyone went to the ice cream parlor. Everyone except Sirius ordered chocolate, strawberry, or vanilla.
"Can I take your order?"
"Hmm, I'll take chocolate chip cookie dough with pineapple slices, crushed walnuts, peanuts, strawberry sauce, whipped cream, sprinkles, and ,of course, a cherry on top." He smiled innocently. "Oh, yeah, and make it in a waffle cone, too!"
Everyone stared.
" Could- could you write that down for me?"
Once she had it, the waitress stood up and plastered a smile on her face. "O…ok…yours may take a little longer, but otherwise, just a few minutes!" She high-tailed it away from him as fast as possible.
''What are you, the bottomless pit or something?" Lily's eyes were wide with shock.
"Nope, just one hungry person."
"Say, isn't there a place called Hungry? Cuz I think your family may have originated there."
"We didn't. I'm sure."
"Well, I'm not."
"Shut up, Prongs."
"Fine, Padfoot. "
Their ice cream finally arrived. Everyone dug in, as the day was hot and ice cream was nice. All was peaceful…for about 5 seconds.
"Hey! They forgot the walnuts!"
"Sirius, Sirius, Sirius." Lily sighed.
"I know I'm special. You don't have to say my name for me to know."
"In what way would that be? The insane special? There's many people out there who are 'special' then." Remus sniggered.
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The next night…
Lily put the finishing touches on her star chart. She'd done hers ahead of time, so she wouldn't have to panic and do it the night it was due. Like Sirius.
"Hey, Lily. How is your night going? Mine's going just great, too! Can I-YEOWCH!"
"Hel-lo Sirius. My night's beautiful. Really? My, my, my was that your foot I stepped on? I'm so sorry. I'm being serious. Or…is it Sirius?" She cracked up.
He whimpered.
"Get your own chart, bub."
"But, Liiiillllly!- OOOWWWWWWW!"
Lily grinned and rolled up her chart, and with a fleeting grin, she left the room.
''OH NO! WHAT AM I GONNA DOOO?"
James came down the stairs, looking at his best friend like he'd gone mad.
"Er….bye now!"
"Waiiit, Prongs, my friend? You wouldn't happen to have your star chart handy, now would you?"
"Nooo. Padfoot, ol' buddy. Get your own!"
"I DON'T HAVE MY OWN!!!"
"Ya know what? You scare me."
"That's exactly what your girlfriend told me."
"Good. Goodbye!" James ran out of the common room as fast as his feet could move.
His next prey was his own girlfriend, who was going to the Great Hall for dinner.
"Hi Sirius."
"Hmph. You're lucky. You don't hafta do the stupid chart."
"What?" She said. "Sirius, I was almost eaten by something that looked like a dead cat and talked like a chicken singing opera. I don't think I'm that lucky."
"Ok, so you're right. Now, what am I gonna doooo!?"
"I really don't know about that, but I really wish you'd calm down."
"I can't do that!"
"Well, then I can't help you. Now, excuse me while I go get something to eat."
"Yes'm."
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A/N: Well, that was a tad bit more…funny. I think. Right now I'm too cold to think up a really good author's note. It's 31 degrees outside and whoo! My lil toes are going numb. I don't think you wanna known this, right? Okies…..PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW!