To Remember the Truth
By Annabelle (hannah@pred.ml.org)
Prologue: Wishes
What if it was Usagi who wanted to protect Mamoru so much (when they died
in SM) that it was *her* who got her memories separated from herself?
*This is what my story is all about, the possibilities of the outcome of
events if Usagi never remembered anything in the beginning. But, the idea
is, Mamoru and the rest of the senshi WILL remember. This is basically
about how they would react and cope up with things.
*Ratings: This chapter (or rather, story) is rated PG, no swears & hentai,
just romance.
*Disclaimers: I don't own everything that you might read--they're Naoko
Takeuchi's, Kondansha's, DiC's, and all of those other companies with lotsa
money. The plot and some of the characters are mine, though. Please, nobody
sue me, I don't want to have men in EXPENSIVE Armani suits to come knocking
on my door with stacks of papers & with lots of words to say.
EXTRA STUFF:
*Comments: This is my first, serious attempt to write a fic, so go easy on
me. Anyway, I'm sorry if you'd see typo & grammar errors; I don't have
someone to edit them for me. If you're good in English or if you want to
volunteer yourself as my editor, please e-mail me. I'd owe you BIG!
Comments, suggestions, flames & all of those other stuff are welcome at
hannah@ml.pred.org.
*Recommendations: I'd like to recommend these fics & authors that inspired
me to do my work:
Lianne Sentar (author of Usagi & Mamoru's Love), you're too good. Fushigi
Kismet (author of Past Loves), I like your stories. Crystal Heart, I always
wait for your awesome stories. Ninx, I love your "Four Lovers" series.
Razzz (First Love) cool fics, eh? To MJ-thanks.
Dedications: This is all dedicated to my really annoying sister, whose
laugh would make you want to punch her. Thanks Abby. And of course, to the
Big G. and to Marmee, the two persons that inspired me most of all.
'________' symbolizes thought.
*________* symbolizes emphasis
~~~ symbolizes a change of scene, view or time gap.
Story:
PROLOGUE: WISHES
A star locket.
She is there, crying, saying, "Mamo-chan, please remember, our joy, our
hope, our love."
'Love,' I think bitterly. Aware of Beryl on my back, I decide to strike
my sword on her still, but something pulls me back, a strong presence. Then
I am drawn to look into her eyes...
Pools of love & pain, of longing, of innocence. I am mesmerized in
those cerulean eyes, which bore into mine. They give me a special
message...they show affections, directed to...me?
A soft, tingling sound enters my ears. It comes from the locket. The
music affects me like light on a dark room. It is like a key, a key to open
a door-- the door of memories & emotions that I've left unbidden. It
showers myself with faint flickers of recognition, with rays of love.
The music, her eyes. I put my sword down. They defeat me. They overcome
me, but not in a demanding way, I do not hear triumphant laughs and threats
& do not feel torture, they give me something... peace.
"Who are you?" I ask so softly, I'm sure no one would hear.
She stands up and her hands hold mine. This time, I do not recoil. I
see her clearly now. I'm trapped, trapped staring at her beautiful face,
trapped in my desires to learn, to know...know what?
"I am the one, the one who knows... the truth." she says, her voice--
it's like an angel's!
She holds the locket out to me. I can't help but touch it. I somehow
recognize it...it seems like my only hope. Yet, she is too.
I feel myself fading, being pulled into another world-- but I do not
fret, she is with me. She won't leave me. I'll always remain with her; I
will always see her face. I feel myself opening the door...the door to my
other self...
The door to everything I felt.
~~~
I'm alone again, where is she? I need her, I can't do this! I can't do
this alone. Here I am again, panting, sweating, I am in a bed. I'm a child
once more. No one to love, not loved.
I'm alone.
Once again.
"I'm alone..." I choke out...maybe Beryl was right...
I look back at myself, I'm my normal self again, me, my grown self.
But still, I am alone. I feel a solitary tear slide down my cheek.
Then, just like earlier, there is light.
My angel.
She is here! She never left me! She *never leaves* me. Oh...my Odango
Atama.
She is standing just before me, her bright smile making me feel at
content. I want this to last forever.
"Hi...Endymion...Mamo-chan," she says, her sweet lips moving. I smile,
oh how I wish this moment would last forever!
She goes to me, and then she uses her soft, white hand to wipe away the
tear that fell earlier.
Her touch, hands as soft as silk, light appears from her hand.
The door was opened.
A flood of memories cascade into my mind, I see them all in a few
seconds. They come and go very fast, but I know every single detail they
contain, everything. Everything... a blanket of tranquility that wraps
itself around me, I learn the truth.
"Odango Atama...Serenity," I whisper out.
"You are never alone, Mamoru," she breathes back, "I'm always with you,
I will always be with you, darling."
I reach out for her, my princess. She reaches for me too, then we hug.
Oh princess I'll never let you go. I'll protect you; I'll be by your side
always, like you were by me.
~~~
He hugs me, and I wrap my shaking arms around him. Happiness is on
every corner of my soul. 'Oh, Mamo-chan, my conceited jerk, you're back...I
want to show you how much I love you despite everything...'
A sharp sound breaks us off our reverie. There she is, the queen who
started everything, and nearly destroyed it.
The sharp sound is that of a rock spear, which is headed toward us.
No, not for us, it is meant for me.
It comes, very sharp, very fast. I can now feel death knocking on my
door. I don't move.
I can't.
I close my eyes, ready to face destruction...
CLASH!
A rose had broken the spear. Oh, no. My Mamo-chan!
The broken shards of the spear still head for us. Endymion, in his
armor, holds me and turns his back on the shards to protect me. I can only
shiver.
But then I come to my senses.
"Mamo-chan, NO!!"
It's all my fault again! Why do I have to be so fragile? I've never
done anything in battles but dodge and put myself *and* Mamoru in danger.
"Mamoru…save yourself! No!"
~~~
Despite your protests, Usako...I'd still protect you. Usako...my
rabbit, a name just right for you.
My rabbit.
She still protests.
'Oh, Usako...you love me to much, and for you, I'd give my very life.'
Then there they are, shards jabbing my back. I feel pain throughout my
body. But I don't mind. For you, Usako, I won't.
My rose hits Beryl on her chest, she disappears.
Good, you'll be out of danger...for now. I am satisfied with my actions.
I fall forward, Usako is crying now. Odango Atama... don't cry. It
hurts me so to see tears on your eyes.
"Mamo-chan, why did you have to do that?"
"For you, Usako."
"I don't care! Don't you dare leave me, Chiba Mamoru!"
"Odango Atama, thank you..."
Her expression changes, "For what?"
"For showing me the truth,...for never leaving me alone..."
She cries more.
"...and for giving me love."
She buries herself into my shoulders, still sobbing--she knows that I
am dying.
"Usako, don't cry, save the world...it's up to you. Do it, okay?"
She looks at me, still crying, "Yes, Mamo-chan. For you, I will."
I smile.
"Goodbye... Usako..."
Then I give out my final breath.
~~~
"Mamo-chan…"
He's dead.
And there's nothing more I can do about it.
But I can fulfill my promise.
I wipe my tears as I stand up, "Mamo, I'd save the world for you, for
all, and I promise: We'd be together again. I'd protect you always, we'll
never be separated, I promise!"
~~~ Moments Later...Usagi.
I lie down the snow, I feel so tired, so numb, and life is edging
itself away. I'm dying.
"At least Beryl & Metallia are dead too..." I say in a barely audible
voice.
I choke out, "Mamo-chan, I kept my promise, I destroyed her, I saved
the world..."
I laugh, how ironic, I save the world, yet my reasons to live are
gone...
I'm going to be gone too, anyway.
I guess a simple prayer can help.
"Oh, Lord, if there's one thing I could wish for before I die, it is to
have myself protect my Mamo-chan wherever he is. My friends too...I know
we're all dead, at least I'm gonna be. But if ever we receive new chances
to live, my wish, please..."
I am happy with my wish, then I smile as the darkness surround me...
~~~
Everything is dark...
Of course, I'm dead.
Dead.
That word, being pulled away and being separated by an abyss from the
ones you love. It's entering a door that locks when you're inside.
I wonder where my Mamo-chan is...
Will the door unlock? Will we be given another chance...to live? By the
One above and by the...
I see light pulsing somewhere.
...The Silver Crystal?
No matter. My Mamo-chan. I always hated him, never realizing how much I
cared for him deep down. I never loved because he was Tuxedo mask; I loved
him because he was...him. Because he was the silly, conceited clown I
always argue with. I fell for him the first time I saw him. I'm glad he
feels the same. I love you Mamoru.
I look back to the shining light, the Silver Crystal.
Protect my Mamo-chan...
~~~
Usako, I hope you're all right.
I hope you're happy.
I know I can never be with her again. All the time, I had teased her &
saw all the flaws in her, but then I now realize how good and valuable she
was despite her klutziness & everything. She was so caring, so lovely. She
was compassionate, friendly, and pure...loving. Oh how I wish now to stare
at her eyes, to run my fingers through her golden hair, to kiss those
irresistible soft, sweet lips. To feel love and warmth...
Light...is that her?
Let me suffer, let me long for her in this doomed place. But my
beautiful and lively Usako deserves to live and be protected. She needs to
wake up late everyday and run like a hurricane down the streets. She
deserves every bit of normality and happiness...
But not like me. I never really opened up to anyone, even to Motoki. I
grew up on being distant from everybody. I was cold.
But SHE warmed me.
It's not like I deserve her. A mean, conceited person like me. I was
blinded by my own selfishness and by my desires to find my princess. I
never saw the REAL her. Even if I had, I denied it, closed the subject.
Left it to be. I was scared, oh if I have listened to my heart instead of
my desires...I could have been with her, even if just for a short moment.
And when I found out SHE was my princess...my happiness had flooded
throughout me. My unknown relief came next. Yet sadness followed, for my
being blind.
As for now, all I wish is her safety. *Oh how I wish to protect her. *
She MUST live. She can start all over again, finish her studies, share
her everything to someone and be happy.
Unfortunately, that certain someone has to be someone else.
And not me.
~~~
The Silver Crystal.
The two wishes clash, the wishes of two lovers who so desperately want
to protect each other...
But only one must prevail; only one can be granted.
Suddenly, a ray of light from above shines over the crystal.
The light comes from up above, from the skies, from heaven.
It is the wish made earlier by one of them, when she had been alive.
The crystal pulsed, it chose to grant...
The princess's wish.
~~~
In the darkness, in her grave, the girl lies motionless. She is
sprawled on the ground.
Suddenly, a figure rises over her, yet it isn't another person.
The figure is *her,* herself too.
She kneels down and whispers to the unmoving girl, "Usagi, you're wish
is to be granted. I am your *past* memories, your unknown feelings. To do
your wish, I must separate from you. You won't remember anything for now,
but your wish to protect them will prevail."
She smiles and leaves.
Then there is a bright flash of light.
A distinctive voice can be heard, "You are to live...again."
~~~
The sun rose over the horizon. Birds sang and flew from side to side.
It was going to be a beautiful new day.
A young blonde girl with two buns on her head ran past the sidewalks,
screaming loudly...and most probably, madly.
"I'M GONNA BE LATE!"
She gave off a boost of speed and ran faster. Then...
"BAMM!"
"Hey, why don't you watch where you're going!"
"I'm gonna be late!" she said for the second time.
"I don't care!"
"WAAHHH! Why do you have to be so mean?!"
The man laughed, "Odango Atama, stop crying--people will think that you're
a crybaby."
The girl became angry, "Don't call me that!" she snapped.
"Sure, Odango Atama!"
The girl just shouted at him, but then she remembered the time, so she
ran off.
When she was gone, the college student looked back.
He smiled.
Then he walked off.
The two who had risked [and lost] their lives for each other in battle,
now know nothing at all about the past days. They lost their memories.
Yet, there is always that tie that binds.
Meanwhile, somewhere up in the roofs...
A lady, covered in Arabian attire, removed her headdress to reveal two
buns of golden hair, with pigtails flowing in tresses. The mask on her face
was still on. She smiled all throughout the incident, then laughed. She
covered her head again and ran off to the direction of the man. Yes, this
is the woman who rose from Usagi's body earlier.
"Mamoru, I'll protect you...that was what she wanted."
End of Prologue:
Story written by Annabelle hannah@pred.ml.org
Next Part: "To Remember The Truth," Part 1 Memories: Remembrance--This
happens two months later. Two new students arrive in Juuban. Suddenly, a
Cardian appears & Luna tries to make Usagi remember, but to her greatest
shock, USAGI CAN'T.
By Annabelle (hannah@pred.ml.org)
Prologue: Wishes
What if it was Usagi who wanted to protect Mamoru so much (when they died
in SM) that it was *her* who got her memories separated from herself?
*This is what my story is all about, the possibilities of the outcome of
events if Usagi never remembered anything in the beginning. But, the idea
is, Mamoru and the rest of the senshi WILL remember. This is basically
about how they would react and cope up with things.
*Ratings: This chapter (or rather, story) is rated PG, no swears & hentai,
just romance.
*Disclaimers: I don't own everything that you might read--they're Naoko
Takeuchi's, Kondansha's, DiC's, and all of those other companies with lotsa
money. The plot and some of the characters are mine, though. Please, nobody
sue me, I don't want to have men in EXPENSIVE Armani suits to come knocking
on my door with stacks of papers & with lots of words to say.
EXTRA STUFF:
*Comments: This is my first, serious attempt to write a fic, so go easy on
me. Anyway, I'm sorry if you'd see typo & grammar errors; I don't have
someone to edit them for me. If you're good in English or if you want to
volunteer yourself as my editor, please e-mail me. I'd owe you BIG!
Comments, suggestions, flames & all of those other stuff are welcome at
hannah@ml.pred.org.
*Recommendations: I'd like to recommend these fics & authors that inspired
me to do my work:
Lianne Sentar (author of Usagi & Mamoru's Love), you're too good. Fushigi
Kismet (author of Past Loves), I like your stories. Crystal Heart, I always
wait for your awesome stories. Ninx, I love your "Four Lovers" series.
Razzz (First Love) cool fics, eh? To MJ-thanks.
Dedications: This is all dedicated to my really annoying sister, whose
laugh would make you want to punch her. Thanks Abby. And of course, to the
Big G. and to Marmee, the two persons that inspired me most of all.
'________' symbolizes thought.
*________* symbolizes emphasis
~~~ symbolizes a change of scene, view or time gap.
Story:
PROLOGUE: WISHES
A star locket.
She is there, crying, saying, "Mamo-chan, please remember, our joy, our
hope, our love."
'Love,' I think bitterly. Aware of Beryl on my back, I decide to strike
my sword on her still, but something pulls me back, a strong presence. Then
I am drawn to look into her eyes...
Pools of love & pain, of longing, of innocence. I am mesmerized in
those cerulean eyes, which bore into mine. They give me a special
message...they show affections, directed to...me?
A soft, tingling sound enters my ears. It comes from the locket. The
music affects me like light on a dark room. It is like a key, a key to open
a door-- the door of memories & emotions that I've left unbidden. It
showers myself with faint flickers of recognition, with rays of love.
The music, her eyes. I put my sword down. They defeat me. They overcome
me, but not in a demanding way, I do not hear triumphant laughs and threats
& do not feel torture, they give me something... peace.
"Who are you?" I ask so softly, I'm sure no one would hear.
She stands up and her hands hold mine. This time, I do not recoil. I
see her clearly now. I'm trapped, trapped staring at her beautiful face,
trapped in my desires to learn, to know...know what?
"I am the one, the one who knows... the truth." she says, her voice--
it's like an angel's!
She holds the locket out to me. I can't help but touch it. I somehow
recognize it...it seems like my only hope. Yet, she is too.
I feel myself fading, being pulled into another world-- but I do not
fret, she is with me. She won't leave me. I'll always remain with her; I
will always see her face. I feel myself opening the door...the door to my
other self...
The door to everything I felt.
~~~
I'm alone again, where is she? I need her, I can't do this! I can't do
this alone. Here I am again, panting, sweating, I am in a bed. I'm a child
once more. No one to love, not loved.
I'm alone.
Once again.
"I'm alone..." I choke out...maybe Beryl was right...
I look back at myself, I'm my normal self again, me, my grown self.
But still, I am alone. I feel a solitary tear slide down my cheek.
Then, just like earlier, there is light.
My angel.
She is here! She never left me! She *never leaves* me. Oh...my Odango
Atama.
She is standing just before me, her bright smile making me feel at
content. I want this to last forever.
"Hi...Endymion...Mamo-chan," she says, her sweet lips moving. I smile,
oh how I wish this moment would last forever!
She goes to me, and then she uses her soft, white hand to wipe away the
tear that fell earlier.
Her touch, hands as soft as silk, light appears from her hand.
The door was opened.
A flood of memories cascade into my mind, I see them all in a few
seconds. They come and go very fast, but I know every single detail they
contain, everything. Everything... a blanket of tranquility that wraps
itself around me, I learn the truth.
"Odango Atama...Serenity," I whisper out.
"You are never alone, Mamoru," she breathes back, "I'm always with you,
I will always be with you, darling."
I reach out for her, my princess. She reaches for me too, then we hug.
Oh princess I'll never let you go. I'll protect you; I'll be by your side
always, like you were by me.
~~~
He hugs me, and I wrap my shaking arms around him. Happiness is on
every corner of my soul. 'Oh, Mamo-chan, my conceited jerk, you're back...I
want to show you how much I love you despite everything...'
A sharp sound breaks us off our reverie. There she is, the queen who
started everything, and nearly destroyed it.
The sharp sound is that of a rock spear, which is headed toward us.
No, not for us, it is meant for me.
It comes, very sharp, very fast. I can now feel death knocking on my
door. I don't move.
I can't.
I close my eyes, ready to face destruction...
CLASH!
A rose had broken the spear. Oh, no. My Mamo-chan!
The broken shards of the spear still head for us. Endymion, in his
armor, holds me and turns his back on the shards to protect me. I can only
shiver.
But then I come to my senses.
"Mamo-chan, NO!!"
It's all my fault again! Why do I have to be so fragile? I've never
done anything in battles but dodge and put myself *and* Mamoru in danger.
"Mamoru…save yourself! No!"
~~~
Despite your protests, Usako...I'd still protect you. Usako...my
rabbit, a name just right for you.
My rabbit.
She still protests.
'Oh, Usako...you love me to much, and for you, I'd give my very life.'
Then there they are, shards jabbing my back. I feel pain throughout my
body. But I don't mind. For you, Usako, I won't.
My rose hits Beryl on her chest, she disappears.
Good, you'll be out of danger...for now. I am satisfied with my actions.
I fall forward, Usako is crying now. Odango Atama... don't cry. It
hurts me so to see tears on your eyes.
"Mamo-chan, why did you have to do that?"
"For you, Usako."
"I don't care! Don't you dare leave me, Chiba Mamoru!"
"Odango Atama, thank you..."
Her expression changes, "For what?"
"For showing me the truth,...for never leaving me alone..."
She cries more.
"...and for giving me love."
She buries herself into my shoulders, still sobbing--she knows that I
am dying.
"Usako, don't cry, save the world...it's up to you. Do it, okay?"
She looks at me, still crying, "Yes, Mamo-chan. For you, I will."
I smile.
"Goodbye... Usako..."
Then I give out my final breath.
~~~
"Mamo-chan…"
He's dead.
And there's nothing more I can do about it.
But I can fulfill my promise.
I wipe my tears as I stand up, "Mamo, I'd save the world for you, for
all, and I promise: We'd be together again. I'd protect you always, we'll
never be separated, I promise!"
~~~ Moments Later...Usagi.
I lie down the snow, I feel so tired, so numb, and life is edging
itself away. I'm dying.
"At least Beryl & Metallia are dead too..." I say in a barely audible
voice.
I choke out, "Mamo-chan, I kept my promise, I destroyed her, I saved
the world..."
I laugh, how ironic, I save the world, yet my reasons to live are
gone...
I'm going to be gone too, anyway.
I guess a simple prayer can help.
"Oh, Lord, if there's one thing I could wish for before I die, it is to
have myself protect my Mamo-chan wherever he is. My friends too...I know
we're all dead, at least I'm gonna be. But if ever we receive new chances
to live, my wish, please..."
I am happy with my wish, then I smile as the darkness surround me...
~~~
Everything is dark...
Of course, I'm dead.
Dead.
That word, being pulled away and being separated by an abyss from the
ones you love. It's entering a door that locks when you're inside.
I wonder where my Mamo-chan is...
Will the door unlock? Will we be given another chance...to live? By the
One above and by the...
I see light pulsing somewhere.
...The Silver Crystal?
No matter. My Mamo-chan. I always hated him, never realizing how much I
cared for him deep down. I never loved because he was Tuxedo mask; I loved
him because he was...him. Because he was the silly, conceited clown I
always argue with. I fell for him the first time I saw him. I'm glad he
feels the same. I love you Mamoru.
I look back to the shining light, the Silver Crystal.
Protect my Mamo-chan...
~~~
Usako, I hope you're all right.
I hope you're happy.
I know I can never be with her again. All the time, I had teased her &
saw all the flaws in her, but then I now realize how good and valuable she
was despite her klutziness & everything. She was so caring, so lovely. She
was compassionate, friendly, and pure...loving. Oh how I wish now to stare
at her eyes, to run my fingers through her golden hair, to kiss those
irresistible soft, sweet lips. To feel love and warmth...
Light...is that her?
Let me suffer, let me long for her in this doomed place. But my
beautiful and lively Usako deserves to live and be protected. She needs to
wake up late everyday and run like a hurricane down the streets. She
deserves every bit of normality and happiness...
But not like me. I never really opened up to anyone, even to Motoki. I
grew up on being distant from everybody. I was cold.
But SHE warmed me.
It's not like I deserve her. A mean, conceited person like me. I was
blinded by my own selfishness and by my desires to find my princess. I
never saw the REAL her. Even if I had, I denied it, closed the subject.
Left it to be. I was scared, oh if I have listened to my heart instead of
my desires...I could have been with her, even if just for a short moment.
And when I found out SHE was my princess...my happiness had flooded
throughout me. My unknown relief came next. Yet sadness followed, for my
being blind.
As for now, all I wish is her safety. *Oh how I wish to protect her. *
She MUST live. She can start all over again, finish her studies, share
her everything to someone and be happy.
Unfortunately, that certain someone has to be someone else.
And not me.
~~~
The Silver Crystal.
The two wishes clash, the wishes of two lovers who so desperately want
to protect each other...
But only one must prevail; only one can be granted.
Suddenly, a ray of light from above shines over the crystal.
The light comes from up above, from the skies, from heaven.
It is the wish made earlier by one of them, when she had been alive.
The crystal pulsed, it chose to grant...
The princess's wish.
~~~
In the darkness, in her grave, the girl lies motionless. She is
sprawled on the ground.
Suddenly, a figure rises over her, yet it isn't another person.
The figure is *her,* herself too.
She kneels down and whispers to the unmoving girl, "Usagi, you're wish
is to be granted. I am your *past* memories, your unknown feelings. To do
your wish, I must separate from you. You won't remember anything for now,
but your wish to protect them will prevail."
She smiles and leaves.
Then there is a bright flash of light.
A distinctive voice can be heard, "You are to live...again."
~~~
The sun rose over the horizon. Birds sang and flew from side to side.
It was going to be a beautiful new day.
A young blonde girl with two buns on her head ran past the sidewalks,
screaming loudly...and most probably, madly.
"I'M GONNA BE LATE!"
She gave off a boost of speed and ran faster. Then...
"BAMM!"
"Hey, why don't you watch where you're going!"
"I'm gonna be late!" she said for the second time.
"I don't care!"
"WAAHHH! Why do you have to be so mean?!"
The man laughed, "Odango Atama, stop crying--people will think that you're
a crybaby."
The girl became angry, "Don't call me that!" she snapped.
"Sure, Odango Atama!"
The girl just shouted at him, but then she remembered the time, so she
ran off.
When she was gone, the college student looked back.
He smiled.
Then he walked off.
The two who had risked [and lost] their lives for each other in battle,
now know nothing at all about the past days. They lost their memories.
Yet, there is always that tie that binds.
Meanwhile, somewhere up in the roofs...
A lady, covered in Arabian attire, removed her headdress to reveal two
buns of golden hair, with pigtails flowing in tresses. The mask on her face
was still on. She smiled all throughout the incident, then laughed. She
covered her head again and ran off to the direction of the man. Yes, this
is the woman who rose from Usagi's body earlier.
"Mamoru, I'll protect you...that was what she wanted."
End of Prologue:
Story written by Annabelle hannah@pred.ml.org
Next Part: "To Remember The Truth," Part 1 Memories: Remembrance--This
happens two months later. Two new students arrive in Juuban. Suddenly, a
Cardian appears & Luna tries to make Usagi remember, but to her greatest
shock, USAGI CAN'T.