Neferti Presents: The FF7 A-Team- The Sequel!
By- NefertiDagger
Series- Final Fantasy 7
Rating- PG-13
Notes- The sequel. It may or may not be as funny as the first, but I do hope you like it. It's rather short IMO, but please enjoy yourselves. Any opnions, suggestions, requests, E-Mail me at NefertiDagger14@aol.com. Thanks!- Neferti D.
P.S.- This Fic is dedicated to a wonderful person named Becky Gaylord. You were a great cousin, you touched so many lives and it's tragic that your life ended so soon. You will be greatly missed.- Neferti Dagger
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Chapter 1- The Next Day
It had been... 1 day after Barret started the New A-Team, and all was good, except that now the others (Cait Sith, Cloud, Cid and Yuffie) wanted to be members too, but it was filled up, especally when Aeris got enaged to the One Winged Hippie, Sephiroth.
"I pity da foo' who get engaged to Sephiroth!" Barret said for the majority of the morning when he heard the news, but Shera shut him up in an instant by saying the magic words-
"Sha-Zam."
"MPHHHMMMPPPPHHH!!!"
"That's better." Shera walked over to the newspaper sitting in the Inn at Cosmo Canyon (where she was going for her vacation), and read it, looking at the daily headlines, about trade deficit, a riot at Nibelheim for a cross-dresser who's initals were C.S., and something about George W. Bush being elected president of New ShinRa.
"Nothing going on crimewise Barret."
"MMMPPPPHHHH!"
"Sha-Zam." Barret was back to normal and said to Shera-
"You foo'! We need somethin' ta do.... hey! Why don't we head to da' SuperBowl in Junon? Dere might be trouble!"
"Whatever Barret. We don't have tickets." Barret dialed up a number and it rang for several minutes before a certain someone picked up the phone in the middle of........ uhh... moving along then...
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Vincent Valentine was in the middle of 'freakin it' with Lucerica (I wouldn't ask), when the cell phone rang. He got up inthe middle of the somewhat good part and answered it.
"Hello?"
"You Vincent! Barret here. You still have dem tickets for the SuperBowl 37 in Junon?" Barret asked. Vincent groaned. He shut the phone off and said to Lucrecia while getting dressed and heading out the door of the cave-
"NOT A FINGER!"
"Okay then."
With that, she didn't move and just waited.....
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A few seconds later, the whole gang was there, and they got there fast. Barret was now telling them what was going on, and he was wearing a football outfit, as well as Shera. He pointed his gun arm at the sports section of the paper and said-
"Okay ya' foo's! We're going to da SuperBowl 37 in Junon! We might find some crime dere!"
"Uhh Barret... there will be tight security there. President Bush of New ShinRa is going." Aeris pointed out, holding One Winged Hippie Sephiroth's hand, and they were wearing the colors of the Mideel Vipers. Barret slapped his hand on his face and said-
"Oookay then. We foo's are gonna go there, cuz I said so!"
"Whatever then." Aeris groaned getting into the Helluva Fast van, as did the others, and they took off for Junon in the Helluva fast van right away, and CaitSith said, looking as it took off to Cloud-
"I wish I was riding in the Helluva fast van."
"Same here."
"LOOK IT'S THE EX-SOLIDER TURNED CROSS DRESSER! GET HIM!" A Bunch of snooty parents jeered. Cloud took off like a bolt of lighting and Cait Sith shrugged his shoulders and hitched a ride to the Super Bowl, as was everyone else.
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Chapter 2- No Parking
Since the van was fast, getting to Junon before all the crazed football lovers got there was a snap. Barret went into the parking garage, and saw that there was the bane of every driver-
"Damn! There's no parkin' spaces!"
"Isn't it all the same?" Red XIII said dully, reading the newspaper section on the Super Bowl event. Tifa was listening to Hip Hop on her Discman, Vincent was sleeping all while Barret and Shera were trying to find a parking spot.
"Look, over there!" Sephiroth pointed out in that melancholy voice of his. Barret then started to pump up the van and the speed, as the car was backing out, but there was someone who also coveted that parking space.
"Hey...." Aeris started. "Isn't that Hojo?"
"Daddy?" Sephiroth said, looking out the window, and Vincent groaned. Barret jumped the gun and said to Murdock.. eeeerrr... Shera-
"He'd gonna take our spot and others! YOU DEAD MEAT FOO'!!" Barret shouted, and then Hojo speeded into the spot, the same time Barret did and the cars collided wiht a huge crunch and a big fender bender.
*CRUNCH!*
"That might cost a doozy." Red XIII pointed out looking at the two vans slowly about to fall on their rooves. Barret jumped out of the van to confront Hojo for this act of desecration on the Helluva Fast van's part.
"Oh my.... I should look where I park next time!" Hojo spoke daintily. Barret grabbed him by the collar ands aid in an angry voice-
"YOU DEAD MEAT FOO'!!!!!! YOU RUINED MAH HELLUVA FAST VAN!"
"It's not ruined, just a broken fender. I'm getting my seats to the Super Bowl, see you later." Hojo left and Barret yanked everyone out of the van and they got their seats after Barret said to Shera-
"Gotta keep an eye on dat foo'....."
"Really. I'm getting ansy, let's go. Maybe we'll see some action." Miss Stargazer said dully, walking to her seat in the front row near the sidelines for the Junon Gila Monsters. Tifa prepped her legs up on the edge, Red XIII layed on the floor, Aeris sat daintily next to Sephiroth and Vincent and Barret sat next to Shera.
"Isn't this weird." She pointed out, looking across from her seat, seeing Rufus sit down. Barret leaned forward and Sephiroth pointed out in his happy voice-
"I wonder what he's going to do?"
"And I thought he died!" Vincent exclaimed, looking at a few people clamoring after him. Barret shrugged his shoulders and relaxed in his chair, sleeping during the football action on the field.
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"Heh heh..... I see Avalanche Members out there and Hippie Sephiroth...... now is the perfect time to use my newest creation against them and President Bush.... this is for taking MY job at New ShrinRa!" Rufus exclaimed, holding a remote control and hiding outside the stadium.
"Hey dude... what's with the giant mecha thingie?" Yuffie Kisagari asked the blone man. He got angry and slugged the Materia Theif.
"Quit nosing into other business you brat."
"Point Taken."
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Chapter 3- Halftime Havoc
"Hey Barret," Tifa asked, ", When's Halftime?"
"Righ' now foo'."
"Oh, okay... isn't N*Sync and Aerosmith performing?"
"Yup foo'."
The A-Team gathered around the edge of the stadiumn and watched as the throngs of wahsed out teenyboppers gathered around to listen to N'Sync, and so did Shera and Aeris. Barret was confused.
"Why Shera go out dere to a boy band?"
"I dunno." Red XIII asid, listening to come classical music. Well, all was performing well, when something happened, and the ground started to rumble hard. Everyone stopped and the members of N*Suck said to oneanother-
"What's that?"
Barret, Hippie Sephiroth, Red XIII, Tifa and Vincent looked at the edge of the arena and saw a silloute amongst the harvest moon, and there, in the outline of Brittney Spears was........
Rufus stood ontop of the mecha and yelled out over a microphone through the speaker system that suurounded the stadiumn, with loud feedback......-
" BEHOLD... DUH-DAH-DUHNN!!! MECHASPEARS!!!!!!!! AKA BioBritney." He said with pride. The A-Team leaped into action and Barret said to Rufus fromt he bottom seats-
"YOU DEAD MEAT FOO'!!!!!"
"What type of dead meat?" Hippie Sephiroth asked. Barret slugged him hard and took the others to MechaSpears, wo was now dancing, and crushed N'Sync, but missed Aerosmith by a sliver. The girls were all sad and were crushed also by MechaSpears.
"MUWAHAHAHA! NOW I SHALL KILL PRESIDENT BUSH AND THEN AVALANCHE!!!!!"
"Rufus!" Aeris called out, "Avalanche disbanded a year ago! We're the A-Team, and you won't get away with this!" She then added. Rufus crushed Aeris.
"Oh my god! They killed Aeris!" Red XIII said with little emotion. Vincent nodded his head and pulled a squashed Aeris out and de-flattened her. She brushed off dust and said to Barret-
"How do we get rid of this thing?"
"I kno one way foo'!"
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A few seconds later, the Helluva Fast Van came rolling out and up to MechaSpears.
*Hit. me. baby. one. more .time!"
Barret drove the van into Brittney's chest area and it fell like a brick bulidng, and Rufus was sad. He stomped his foot and screamed, crying-
"YOU BROKE IT THAT EASLY!!!!! You won't get away with this you meddling grown-ups, and your Helluva Fast Van too." He was arrested by a few Soliders and then President Bush walked up to the A-Team and proclaimed-
"You are terrific! Thank's for saving everyone."
"No problem foo'. Come on guys, we've gotta go." Barret shoved everyone intot he Helluva fast van and drove off, through the crowd and into the rising moon, to somewhere... I thik it was either Midgar or Gonaga... I dunno.
With that, the A-Team's battle comes to an anti-climatic end, and everything is safe for the world, for now. Who knows what adventures and stories these folks will get into in the future? Who knows?
*The End*
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"Hello? Anyone here?" Lucrecia yelled in the cavem hearing only her echo. She smashed her fist on the ground and muttered to herself as she got dressed-
"Men...... Now I know WHY I went with Hojo instead."
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Epoluge-
Barret Wallace dropped everyone off and he headed back to New Corel with Marlene, and some say he's starting to date Shera , but no one's too sure, he is however, still running the A-Team.
Shera Stargazer is on her vacation in Cosmo Canyon, relaxing the days away with freedom and no-Cid to be nasty to her. She might be dating Barret, but see above. She is the current Ice Tea Drinker champion in Rocket Town.
Tifa Lockheart still runs 7th Heaven in Kalm Town, and she thinking about getting married to Cloud, but with his dopey memory, she's kind of rethinking it, then again, Aeris has Sephiroth......
Vincent Valentine is lurking around from place to place, hoping to get Yuffie of of his tail cause she wants to go out with him (Hey, everyone else has someone), so he's setting up a blind date with Cloud.
Red XIII (Or Nakani) is continuing his scholarships at Kalm, being a world class teacher, and yet, he still finds time to 'fight crime' with the A-Team once in a while, even though he thinks the whole idea is stupid.
Aeris Gainsborough runs a annual tour at the City of the Anceints with her enaged husband Sephiroth. She's quite happy being in love with the man that killed her, since he's changed, hopefully for the better she says to people.
Sephiroth is living a life of tranquility with his newfound happiness, baking Mist Cookies and the like, and he's also going to get married to Aeris sometime in February on her birthday. He is a mamma's boy as always....
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The Others-
Rufus ShrinRa went back to the drawing board for his latest plan to get rid of Avala... I er mean the A-Team, after they destroyed MechaSpears. Laying low, he says to people he's got a good plan, but no one really cares.
Cid Highwind is back to doing what he does best- Swearing, buling airships and looking to the stars. He is learning to cope without Shera around the house, and that could lead to interesting devlopments.....
Professor Hojo got sued by Barret Wallace for the fender bender to the Helluva Fast Van. The court suit is still pending on who will win, but Hojo doesn't care that much about repair costs.
Yuffie Kisagarai is chasing after Vincent, but she is excited about a 'blind date', and she's hoping withs with Cait Sith, since she's a cat person at heart. But is she a moogle person?
Presedent Bush of New ShrinRa is doing well. If you want updates, please tune into CNN/Headline News. ^_-
*The REAL End*