9 Months Saga: THE THIRD TRIMESTER!!!
Part 4.1: Cha la la Head Cha la la
"No....no, no no, I AM NOT GOING TO BE PREGNANT WITH A BABY..."
"But its just for one week. I mean, it ain't like you are going to breast feed it or anything," replied Dr.Briefs as he placed his hands on his waist. "Besides, you did promise Bulma you would do anything for her?"
"Grrrrrr.... just don't let word of this spread okay?"
"I won't....."
"Good!! I'm going to go to the gravity room till you are ready," he said as he turned and walked.
"..... unfortunately, I won't have to say anything for the others to know when we get through."
Freeza's third cousin twice removed stared as he overheard the conversation. "The great Vegeta...... PREGNANT!?! MWHA HA HAH!!! Oh, this can't be true," smirked Freeza as the fires of hell erupted.
"Ahh but it is.... should we go after them now?" asked Freeza's third cousin twice removed.
"NO!!! I told you, not until the child is out. Do you think it would do me any good if....."
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Jeez take a chill pill. Look I'll wait. But I don't see why we can't attack him. I seriously doubt he'll try a Final Flash or anything. When he's like that," replied Freeza's third cousin twice removed as he watched his royal highness flew over towards a hospital to meet back with Dr. Briefs. Bulma was already laying down in a weird contraption with wires and such all over her ripening stomach.
"I'm guessing I gotta sit over there," grumbled Vegeta.
"Oh Vegeta, you won't believe how happy you've made me. When I first heard how my father was going to do the procedure, I didn't think you would...."
"Wait a second.... how ARE you going to transfer the baby from her to me!?!"
"Well, son-in-law.... the first thing we are gonna do is take this needle.... don't worry its only three inches long, and stick it up right under the head. That will soften up you stomach long enough to take this artificial chamber up through your..... Vegeta... hmmm, guess I won't have to knock him out after all."
DAY ONE
Seven hours later........
Vegeta slowly opened his eyes. His vision felt so blurry as he looked down.
"Shhh, he's waking up," spoke a voice.
"How do you feel, Veggie-chan?" said another.
Vegeta's eyes shifted a bit.
"Like a meteor just struck me..... huh, why can't I see my feet.... OH GOD.... IT CAN'T BE!!!" he screamed as he got up. There he was laying in a hospital gown. He looked down and noticed how big his stomach was. "FUCK!!" he cussed as he tried to move around.
"Veggie-chan, isn't this great!! I get to be thin for a week!!" smiled Bulma as she danced around. "Maybe I should let you deliver the baby for me!!!"
"Uh Uh. NO!! I agreed to do this for ONE week and ONE week only. Damn it, how can you women be able to move with this thing in you!?! I feel like a cow trying to ice skate."
"Oh Vegeta, don't worry. You'll get use to it. You must remember the male anatomy was not meant to bear children. Besides, it could be worse.
All of a sudden the door flung open as the sound of a wheel chair filled the air.
"HONESTLY GOKU!!! I hope that teaches you not to train near the Hydrogen tank!! screamed Chi Chi as another nurse wheeled a bandaged Goku into the room.
"Awww Chi Chi, I didn't think doing a Kamehameha near it would do much damage."
"Don't you 'Awwww Chi Chi' me. It was your fault not to read the 'Danger- Flammable gas' sign."
"Well, Mrs. Son. You know the procedure," replied a nurse as Chi Chi rolled her eyes and grabbed the papers to fill out.
"Great, not only do I have to spend a week pregnant, I get to spend a week pregnant with Goku in the same room," grumbled Vegeta. Goku looked over.
"HEY VEGETA!! Man, you've gotten fat since I last saw you. WHAT LUCK!! I get to be in the same room with you. But don't worry. The doctor said I should be out in one week."
"JOY!" he spoke sarcastically.
"Good news, I also have some film left from the wedding."
GOKU VISION!!!
Wave hi to the camera, Vegeta!
"Oh please, let him leave the lens cap on again."
Nope! See I was smart for once and took it off this time. Aren't you proud?
"*grumble grumble*"
So Vegeta, are you going to get a liposuction or something? Hey, Vegeta, why are you growling? Oh well, hey there's Gohan coming in the room. Awww, he even brought some flowers.
"Hi dad. Oh hey, Vegeta. Have you gained weight?"
"If you wanna keep your teeth, I'll pretend I didn't hear that."
Hey, who's that over there? OH!! Hey Bulma! Did you have the baby yet?
"*giggle* No silly. I'm going to though. But Vegeta needs to hold it for a week.
"Really? COOL!! Hey Chi Chi, can you try to have our next kid naturally. I always wanted to hold a baby!! That would be so freggin cool!!"
"Hmmm, I suppose. But how do you know if we will have another child?"
Actually I don't. But my Saiyan instincts tell me we will.
"Oh Goku, you have the instincts of a cow. There is no way we will have a child. We probably got lucky with Gohan."
Yeah, you are probably right. Hey Vegeta, could you like face the camera more. I want to zoom in on your stomach.
"Huh?"
Oh come on. That way everyone years from now will beable to see what you look like during your week of happiness and bliss...........
*zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzhhhhhhhhhh*
An energy ball flew and nailed the camera.
"Yow," screamed Goku as he waved his burnt hand.
"There is NO way, I want to remember this when my son has kids as well," he spoke as he lowered his hand.
"Oh Mr.Vegeta, its time for you to have your first Ultrasound. Oh aren't you excited!!!" said one of the perky nurses as she grabbed him by the hand.
"Ultrasound? What the hell is that!?!"
"Oh don't worry, honey. They're just gonna take pictures of the baby. That's all."
Vegeta wobbled out of the room and followed the nurse, Chi Chi and Bulma towards the room.
"Would you like a wheel chair, Mr.Vegeta?" asked a nurse.
"No, I don't need a wheelchair. I AM THE PRINCE OF SAIYANS..... jesus this is huge hospital. Fine, Fine, I'll take the damn wheelchair," cussed as she opened one up and brought it over to him. As he sat, he watched as people gapped and stared.
"Look mommy, that guy's gonna have a baby!!"
"Oh hush up. He's probably fat cause he doesn't get enough exercise or something."
"But mommy, look at his muscles. They're HUGE!!!"
Vegeta turned towards the two.
"What are you looking at. HAVEN'T YOU EVER SEEN A PREGNANT MAN BEFORE!?!"
The woman gasped as she quickly carried her kid into the office.
"Bah, stupid bakas."
"Oh,Mr.Vegeta. We are almost there. Just a couple of more rooms. Ahh here we are," spoke the nurse as she wheeled the chair inside.
Vegeta sighed. He always heard his mate talk about these things. Oh well, if she's been to more then one, it can't be that bad. Vegeta laid on the bed. The woman opened up Vegeta's gown exposing his belly.
"JESUS!! I didn't know Dr. Briefs did THAT!!!" he said as he noticed how huge he really was.
"Hee hee, I didn't know you had an outie, Veggie-chan," said Bulma as she played with his belly button. Vegeta growled as he tried to reach up and grab her neck.
"Damn.... brat.... can't... reach....gah!!" he screamed as he laid back down.
"Now I know why god made us women be the bearers of the children," said Chi Chi as the nurse spreads the jell over his stomach. She then placed an instrument over it and moved it around.
The women gasped and giggled.
"Oh look, I can see its feet," smiled Chi Chi.
"There's its hands. My, they are so tiny," replied Bulma.
"Over here, it looks like the baby is turning," said the nurse as she moved the instrument. Vegeta, with his curiosity piqued rose up to see the screen.
"THAT'S what we came all this way to do? I don't see anything, just a bunch of shitty lines and static."
"Oh Vegeta, you're not looking hard enough. Here, Dr. Paine, move the thing to its head. You should defiantly see it," said Bulma as the doctor moved the probe a bit.
"Hmmm, yeah, I can sort've see it. BUT THERE'S TOO MUCH DAMN STATIC!!!
"My god!?!" muttered the doctor as she stared at the face.
"What, what's wrong with my baby!?!" asked Bulma.
"Well nothing much... its just.... the face." Bulma leaned forward.
"What's wrong with it?"
"Well, its frowning."
"And there's something wrong with that!?!" said Vegeta as he cocked an eyebrow.
" Unborns,don't display any emotion while still in the womb."
"Ummm, who said its displaying emotion?" muttered Chi Chi. The Doctor turned towards Vegeta and then at the screen.
"Oh."
"Guess now, we know who its gonna look like," smirked Chi Chi as the doctor gasped again.
"Mrs.Briefs, I think your child may have a defect in him. This is the first time where the umbilical cord is sprouting from both sides."
"HA!! I KNEW THERE WAS SOME SAIYAN BLOOD IN HIM AFTER ALL!!!" Vegeta pulled his hospital gown back down and started slugging back into the wheel chair.
"Well woman. What are you just standing there, take me back to my quarters. This load is killing me," he grumbled as Bulma rolled her eyes and pushed his royal highness towards his room.
DAY TWO
Later.... in the middle of the day......
Vegeta laid there. He gazed over and watched Goku play "Pokemon Gold" on his Gameboy Color.
"How can you stand that thing. All it involves is catching a bunch of rodents. For god's sake, there's barely a plot on...."
"YEAH!! I CAUGHT A JIGGLYPUFF!!!" shouted Goku.
"Bah, exploiting yourself to mindless entertainment. I swear, you are becoming more and more like an earthling everyday, Kakorot."
"Do you want to hear it sing, Vegeta?" asked Goku as he held the little handheld in front of his face.
"No, I-do-NOT-want-to-hear it sing,"Vegeta rolled his eyes as he turned to his side. Pregnant, how could that woman stand to be like this. He's lucky if he could walk to the other side of the room to take a crap.
Suddenly, a strange yearning began to claim his soul. His mouth went dry as the enigment thought began to roll over and over and clouded his mind.
"Damn, where am I gonna get a Twinkie at?" he muttered to himself. Heaving himself to a sitting position, he began to concentrate his ki. The bed slowly but surely moved towards the window. His eyes searched.... ah.. perfect.
"HEY VEGETA!! Where are you going?" asked Goku as he used his ki to move the bed next to him.
"What does it look like, I'm going to get me some Twinkies."
"But the doctor said you shouldn't overexert yourself in your condition."
"Fine Fine."
"You're in better shape," he stated as he grabbed Goku by the collar and chucked him outside. Goku screamed as his I V came undone and landed smack dab in the middle of the street. Goku rubbed his head as he looked above.
"AND MAKE SURE YOU GET THE "HOSTESS" BRAND!! ITS YOUR HEAD IF I MUST ENDURE THE GENERIC CRAP!!!" he shouted from above.
"BUT I DON'T HAVE MONEY!!! DO YOU ACTUALLY THINK I GET PAID TO SAVE THE WORLD EVERYTIME?"
"oh for the love of kami...... HERE!! TAKE BULMA'S CREDIT CARD!! SHE WON'T CARE!!" he yelled back as he tossed the plastic card out.
"UHHH, OKAY!!" he shouted back as he picked up the card and gave a thumbs up. Goku limped as walked across the street. Good thing he only had a few broken ribs. Sure it would hurt to walk, but he didn't want to deprive Vegeta of his Twinkie cravings. No, this is a mission. He was the hero of the series. He was the protector of the weak... and the pregnant now. He turned and saw a grocery store.
"Perfect!!" he said as the doors slid open. "Wow, automatic. We really are becoming more technologically advanced. Heyyyy,that was kind've fun."
With that, Goku quickly exited and reentered the automatic doors. "Wow, this is so cool!!" he said as ran around again. "I bet Piccolo would get a kick out of this!!" he said to himself as he pranced out the exit and through the automatic doors. He giggled like a school girl as he skipped out the exit again and back through the automatic doors. "Excuse me sir, can I help you?" asked a man. Goku turned.
"Oh, I'm looking for Twinkies!!"
"Mmmm, yes, and I'm sure, going around and around the automatic doors are going to help."
"Oh, heh heh. Ummmmmm, could you like show me where you keep the Twinkies again?" blushed Goku as he rubbed the back of his bandaged head.
"This way," said the man as Goku followed him. Goku's mouth watered at the sight of all the food. All they gave him was a tiny tray of stuff that was %80 indigestible. He could probably go grab a couple of items. Bulma wouldn't care. She's richer then Bill Gates.
Back down in the Next Dimension.......
"COUSIN!!! Now is your chance to DESTROY that pathetic monkey boy while he is injured and off guard," shouted Freeza.
Back up above.....
"Right!!" replied Freeza's third Cousin Twice Removed. His body slithered down the building. He could already see Goku wandering through the store, gathering various fruits and such. "Prepare to die, you accursed ape!!" he laughed as he shot forward towards the doors preparing to break them. Suddenly they shot open. Freeza's third cousin twice removed just stood there in awe.
"What are looking at!?! What did I tell you.... Kill him...KILL HIM!!!!!!!!" shouted Freeza as he jumped up and down.
"But didn't you see that? They opened... on their own..... you didn't even have to push any buttons. These earthlings must me quite advanced," he marveled as he walked out the exit and entered through the automatic doors. "This is so incredible," he murmured as he walked out and reentered again. "WEEEEEEEEEEEE" he giggled as he ran around and around through the automatic doors.
"Oh for kami's sake.... I should've hired my sister-in-law to help me conquer this damn rock," grumbled Freeza as he watched his cousin play around.
Back at the Hospital.....
"Gah, where_is_KAKOROT!?! He should've been back by now with my Twinkies," growled Vegeta as he tore a pillow in half in frustration. "God I got to piss. This is the fifth time since the operation. Has this baby made my bladder shrink or something!?!" he thought as he headed towards the crapper. On his way, he turned towards the window.
Ahhh, there he is. But why is he pushing a shopping cart!?! How much crap did that Saiyan buy this time. This I got to see. With that, Vegeta slowly floated down towards where Goku was.
"Ah, hey Vegeta. Here are your Twinkies. Hope you don't mind if I pick up a few items," smiled Goku as he handed him the box. Vegeta's eyes glanced back and forth as he began to rummage through the items.
"Ding-Dongs...... Ham..... Bananas..... SPAM!?!"
"It was on sale for 2 for a quarter."
"Oh. Well at least we will not have to suffer through more hospital food. I guess there is a brain in there after al*..... oh crap.... WHY IS IT WHEN YOU ARE AROUND, SOMETHING HAPPENS TO ME!!!" Goku turned and smiled.
"Oh its just Tien and Chowzu. HEY GUYS!!!" he shouted.
"Hey Goku. Whoa, is that Vegeta? Man, what happened to you. You realize we have to be in top shape when we battle those androids."
"Look..... this is gonna sound retarded.... but I am NOT fat.... I'm just...PREGNANT!!! GOT IT!!!!" Chowzu and Tien looked at each other.
"Ummmm, gee, how are you gonna do a Final Flash like that?" asked Chowzu.
Vegeta's eyebrow twitched.
"ISN'T THERE ANYONE IN THIS STORY WHO'S BRAIN IS LARGER THEN A.....gah..."
"Vegeta, are you all right? Is the baby kicking again?" asked Goku as looked over. Vegeta shoved Goku's hand away.
"I don't need your help!! I am the great Prince of Saiyans, and I don't want to be babied around like some weak woman!!!" he replied as he floated back to the hospital room with his Twinkies at hand. Goku immediately followed him. "Are you suppose to be a dog or something!?!"
"Oh come on, Vegeta. I'm your roommate!!"
"lovely...."
A nurse then walked in.
"Mr.Vegeta. Dr.Briefs told me you need to take this serum, this should prevent your body from going into sudden labor if the baby comes out early."
"Look I don't need..." Vegeta stopped his sentence as he watched Goku's face cringe at the 2 inch needle she held. ".... on second thought, maybe I do need that shot.... but could you do it nice and slow."
"Of course, Mr.Vegeta. My, this is the first time you've actually been cooperative." Vegeta smirked as Goku started to squeeze on his pillow till it blew up in his hands. "Where on your stomach would you like the needle to be inserted? I suggest the sides since that is where the less pain is located at."
"No, why don't you place it right in the center. That way it would provide the most..... effective results."
Goku's eyes were as widen as the needle tip gleamed in the sunlight. Vegeta lifted the hospital gown so the nurse can make a small dot with the marker on where her target should be. The needle came closer, and closer. Sweat began to pore from Goku's temples as Vegeta closed his eyes and began to lightly hum to himself.
"NOOOOO!!! I CAN'T TAKE IT!!"
*BOOM* Went a noise. Vegeta opened his eyes and smiled. The imprint of a man's body was lamented in the wall.
"Heh heh, that should keep him out for a while," he grinned delightfully to himself. "Mr.Vegeta, do you still want the needle to go through the center of your stomach?" she asked. Vegeta shifted his eyes as the sound of more walls being ran through echoed throughout the building.
"Nah, just give me the pill and I'll be fine," he replied as the nurse placed the needle away, got out a bottle, and pored out two capsules.
DAY THREE
Back at the Capsule Corps building.....
"I still can't believe how thin you are, Bulma. Its like you just given birth or somethin'. More ice tea, Chi Chi?" asked Mrs.Briefs as she held the pot.
"No thanks," she replied as she held her hand up. "So Bulma, are you saying it's possible for us to have a Saiyan child naturally? "
"Sure is. But I suggest you do the procedure before hand. I can't sleep with the thought that I placed my baby in Vegeta's stomach."
"Well. At least all that pride is what will keep the baby alive," replied Chi Chi. "What do you mean?"
"Well think about it, do you think the great prince of saiyans, would let word that he let one of his own die within him?"
"Yeah, good point. Heh heh, you know what? I always wonder... will me and Vegeta, be together... forever? We aren't exactly of the same blood. Wish he would tell me he loved me, once in a while."
"Same here, but I always wonder if Goku.... and I.... will grow old together. You know. Ever since he died and came back or when we thought he was dead on Namek... I'm always afraid I would lose him. But then again.... could you imagine what would life be like...."
50 years..... Chi Chi's Fantasy....... In some retirement home....
A little girl with her hair all whirled up in a black cream puff manner walked in. An old woman with grayish lavender hair walked towards her and hugged her.
"Hello Grandma Bulma, I brought you some prewty flowers," she smiled.
"Ahh that's so sweet of you Vejita. How come your brother Vegeta III. isn't here?"
"Oh, big brother went up and had to help GokuIV save the world again. Don't worry. They said they should be back by supper time."
*sigh* "I hope so. you know your father becomes quite upset if he doesn't get to have dinner on time......"
"WOMAN!!! DAG NABBET!! WHERE'S MY STRAINED CARROTS AT!?!!!" shouted a high pitched voice.
".... unfortunately its even worse for your grandfather," she muttered as little Vejita giggled. The two walked inside another room where a bald old man with wide glasses sat at a table, wearing a bib. A raven haired woman, apparently was feeding him.
"Now now Krillan. Open up so the choo choo can enter the tunnel. Oh? Why Chi Chi. Its so good to see you after all these years. How's Goku?"
"Oh he's just all fine and dandy. Just as long as he has Pokemon Fuscia and Beige, he'll be all right."
"WOMAN!!! BRING ME MY DINNER!!!HOW WILL I BECOME STRONGER THEN THAT BAKA, KAKOROT IF YOU WASTE YOUR TIME JIBBER JABBERING!?!" shouted Vegeta.
"Oh for the love of.... I still can't believe he's still trying to outdo Goku. The only move he has left is to whack him on the head with his cane."
"CHI CHI!!! HURRY!!! I NEED ANOTHER SET OF BATTERIES SO I CAN SAVE THE GAME FROM WHERE I CAUGHT MURAIPUFF!!!" shouted Goku.
"BULMA!!!!! CAN YOU HAND ME THE REMOTE!! I DROPPED IT IN THE SOFA AGAIN!!" Tien complained.
"Chi Chi, can I have more pureed rice?" asked Krillan.
"CHI CHI!!! MY BED PAN IS OVERFILLING AGAIN!!" cried Piccolo.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
The two women gasped at the horrible vision.
"I hope they don't turn into a bunch of Z-Babies when they grow old," muttered Chi Chi as she shuttered at the thought.
DAY FOUR
Freeza's third cousin twice removed soared through the air. The lab had to be here somewhere. His fuschia eyes rummaged through the area.
"THERE IT IS!!" he shouted as he quickly dropped altitude and landed in the dense mountain scape. He walked over towards the door and gave it a brief knock.
An eye panel slid open.
"Are you Freeza's Third Cousin Twice Removed?" asked the old man as his eyes narrowed.
"I am."
"Come in. We can discuss business there," he spoke as he opened the large, metal plated door. Dr.Gero carefully held the torch as Freeza's third cousin twice removed walked through.
"Oh, by the way, why are you carrying that thing. I mean, the light switches are right over there?" he asked.
"Eh, gives it a more haunting atmosphere and makes me look more scarier," he replied as they descended down the.... um....escalator.
Freeza'sTCTR turned his head towards an odd machine.
"Is that what the child is for?" he asked as he stared at the various forms of lasers that pointed towards a chair.
"It is. It will be my greatest masterpiece I have ever conceived. It fascinates me at the kind of tools your race uses. Never in a million years would I be able to create something quite like this. Now, what else was it that you needed?" asked Dr. Gero as he pulled out a cigar and lit it.
"I CAN TELL YOU THAT!! I NEED SOMETHING MORE RELIABLE TO DESTROY GOKU THEN MY IDIOT COUSIN HERE!!" shouted Freeza from the next dimension.
"Uhh, Freeza said he wanted somemore help in killing Goku so no one can stop me from kidnapping the child when it is conceived," replied Freeza's TCTR as he turned towards Gero. Gero closed his eyes as he placed his hands behind his back.
"I may have something that might pique your interest. You may use it in anyway you please as long as its used to kill Goku. Its sleek body resembled the human model but without the skin. "Its name is #17 Beta. I have another just like it along with a female version. This way I will get to see how well my androids will fair and any modifications needed to make them the perfect assassins," laughed Dr.Gero as he pressed a few buttons.
Its eyes glowed a bright red as the its engines slowly began to hum.
And now a commercial break from one of our sponsors......
In the middle of a living room.... two little nameks lay on their stomachs......
on video: Now its time to send you to the Next Dimension
Dende and Cargo: *sigh*
Narrator: Gee, what's wrong Chibi Dende and Cargo
Dende and Cargo: *sigh* WE'RE SICK OF THESE DUBS;THEY JUST PLAIN SUCK!!
Cargo: Krillan sounds like he has a nasal problem
Dende: and they cut out all the blood and gore.
Cargo and Dende: We want NEWWWWWWWW Episodes
Narrator: Then why don't you try the new Subbed versions of Dragonball Z.
Later....
Dende: WHOA!! SO THAT'S HOW YAMCHA GOT THAT HOLE IN HIS STOMACH!!!
Cargo: I don't see nothing wrong with his foot. Why the hell did they put a rock by his toe.
Cargo and Dende: THANKS NARRATOR!!!
Narrator: Yes Subbed. All kids love Subs.
Chorus: (authour note: sung to "LOG" from Ren and Stimpy)
What, is uncut,
that shows gore and guts
but what censorship won't allow
Buy them on the net
Each separate or set,
CAUSE ITS SUBBED, SUBBED, SUBBED!!!
ITS SUBBEDDDD, ITS SUBBEDDDD,
Edited, I think not
ITS SUBBEDDDD, ITS SUBBEDDDD,
Shows how badly FUNimation
FUCKED UP!!!
You're gonna love a sub.
Come on and buy a sub
Everyone loves the subbed,
Come on and get your sub, sub, sub
Narrator: Batteries not included.
*Do do do do do do do*
and now back to the 9 Months Saga......
DAY FIVE
The day broke as Vegeta laid in the hospital bed. Five days..... five days since he had to spend every single minute.... with him...... look at him. Sleeping peacefully. He could be out training in the Gravity Room but instead is forced to put up with his constant bickering....is he waking up?
"Hey Vegeta?"
"What is it now, Kakorot!?!"
"Do you miss, Bulma?"
"Why do you want to know?"
"Cause I miss Chi Chi."
"Why!?! You've been away from her, for about one and a half years at one time. Why do you miss her now?"
"I've always missed her. Even during those times, I missed her. I never showed it. I couldn't or Freeza would know how much I care about my family and attempt to go after them. You'd be surprised how much your family's gonna turn you around. You'll find that they will become your only strength, when hope is gone and the odds are against you, and you realize you must fight for them and only them."
"Kakorot?"
"Yes, Vegeta?"
"That was the most retarded quote I have ever heard."
"Yeah, you're right. Man I've been reading too much Reader's Digest." Vegeta widen his eyes a bit.
"You know how to read?"
"Oh yeah,I'm working on "War and Peace".... maybe a bit of old Greek manuscripts. My favorite book is anything by Dr.Suess. Especially "Hop on Pop" and 'How the Grinch stole Christmas'." Vegeta sighed.
"Just when I thought there was something, more then air... wait a second.... what was that!?!" asked Vegeta as he grabs a bar to help pull himself forward. Goku turned as he hopped out of bed, quickly pulling off the various equipment hooked on him. His breath was silent as a smooth humming was heard. Goku began to power up an energy ball as the humming grew louder and louder.
*BOOM* A hand shot right through the wall and grabbed Goku by the throat. His fingers tensed as desperately tried to free himself. Vegeta quickly powered up his own ki blast and shot at the hand, severing it from its owner. It then pulled out the rest of its wrist and appeared from the window. Its sleek metal glistened against its the sun. Its eyes met up with Vegeta's.
*Target identified:..........
NAME:Vegeta
RACE: Saiyan
ORDERS:Do not harm until specimen has been taken.
With that, #17 beta motioned over towards Goku who laid on the floor, as he pulled the dissected hand off.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!! FIGHT ME DAMN IT!!! JUST BECAUSE I'M PREGNANT DOESN'T MEAN YOU MUST IGNORE ME!!" shouted Vegeta. The android scanned Goku.
NAME: Goku
AGE: 35
IQ: ....... not applicable
Orders: Destroy at will.
Goku looked as several Missiles began to pull out of the android an point at him.
"Uh oh, this is gonna hurt,' he replied as they all shot at him at once and knocked him out the window. Goku fell.... the air seemed as if it was rising, then a miracle happened.
"GOTCHA!!" Goku turned and saw Piccolo holding him by the end of his gown.
"Hey Piccolo. Wow, how did you get to me so fast?" he asked.
"Eh, I read the first draft of this story," he replied as he turned towards the sleek machine.
It narrowed its eyes.
NAME: Piccolo.
RACE: Namek
Preferred choice of chewing gum: Juicy Fruit
ORDERS: Kill him anyway and turn into matching luggage.
"Yeah, I thought you would try something like that," smirked Piccolo as he read what it was planning from my first dr***....hold on..how the hell did he grab a copy of it!?! Piccolo turned towards the android and flew straight into the android. With the blink of an eye, tore out several wires from its chest cavity. It twitched, as sparks flew from the long copper tips with a dazzling aurora. Its red eyes blinked as its memory began to scramble beyond identification. Finally, it crumbled down upon its knee joints and the lights that once buzzed all round began to fade into a nothingness.
Goku slowly shook his head from the impact as he watched the nursing Vegeta repeatedly kick the bot.
"YOU STUPID TIN CAN!! WHY DIDN'T YOU FIGHT ME!!! HOW DARE YOU REFUSED TO ATTACK ME, THE GREAT PRINCE OF SAIYANS, AND GO AFTER A PATHETIC THIRD CLASS SOLDER!?!" he shouted as he placed his hands on his hips. All of a sudden, he clutched his stomach.
"VEGETA!! ARE YOU ALL RIGHT!!" screamed Goku as he ran towards him.
"Jesus, no wonder that woman wanted me to hold this thing. I can already feel it shooting ki blasts inside me. He said as Goku watch his stomach brighten from the energy of the Ki blasts to the point where he could see the baby as if a mere veil of silk was placed on top of it.
Vegeta floated back to the hospital. He was deeply surprised at how much energy this little brat was sapping out of him. He needed something to eat. Goku was to follow him as well, but a familiar green clawed hand grabbed his shoulder.
"Did you see that?" mumbled Piccolo.
"Yeah, Trunks, is gonna be pretty powerful when he gets older."
"Exactly. But why did the android go after you instead of Vegeta. You HEARD what he said. That child is sapping his ki, making Vegeta very weak. That cyborg had the chance but went after you as if avoiding Vegeta completely."
"Are you saying that walking toaster didn't want Vegeta touched? Weird."
"I will be watching this hospital to insure no more attacks happen while you and Vegeta are in your *cough* condition."
"Thanks."
"Don't mention it. Just insure Vegeta gets some good sleep so that baby won't come into the world with a bad temper."
"Heh heh, don't mention it," he replied as Piccolo pulled him back into his room.
DAY SIX
Dr. Gero examined his results.
"Five Minutes!?! My life's work..... lasted only FIVE minutes against a some Cabbage man named after a flute!?!" he cried as his fingers began to wrinkle the piece of paper.
"So the bot, was a complete failure. We're the bad guys, we're suppose to lose," replied Freeza's Third Cousin Twice Removed as he folded his arms and leaned against the doorway. "Besides, like you said, at least now you can get rid of some of the flaws that were encompasses in the Beta version. Dr.Gero turned his aged head towards him.
"You're right. The first thing I want out, is these energy absorbers and just replace the blasted generator with an eternal battery." Dr. Gero quickly moved towards his two sleeping androids as he began to unscrew their panels and place an item inside.
"WHOA, IS THAT A BOMB!?!"
Dr.Gero turned towards his paled faced friend.
"Of course its a bomb. I don't think it would help if I placed an alarm clock inside them."
"But....... why?"
"Because..... if for some odd reason, after all the adjustments I make on these two, that they are unable to beat Goku. Then I'll merely blow him up and everyone within a five mile radius."
"Man, no wonder Cousin Freezy wanted to have you help me execute his plan."
"Cousin Freezy? HAH HAH HA!!" "My god, no wonder, Vegeta's brat turned you into sushi!!" laughed the Ginyu Force from the next Dimension.
"GAH!! WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU NOT TO USE MY HIGH SCHOOL NICK NAME IN PUBLIC!?!" shouted Freeza as his face began to glow bright red.
"Sorry, it just.... slipped," muttered Freeza's third cousin twice removed.
"Who are you talking to?" asked Dr.Gero as he adjusted the controls.
"Oh, just to Freeza from the pits of hell. Not much."
"Oh okay, just talk more quietly. I need all the concentration I can...."
"HEY!!! WATCH WHERE YOU PLACE YOUR HANDS AT!!!" shouted #18 as Dr.Gero drops the screwdriver inside her.
"Gah, now look what you made me do. Damn it, I knew I should've stuck with the your former 'damsel in distress' model," he murmured as he dug the little tool out.
"Oh well, At least I didn't wind up as 'fat-ass #19'. " replied #18.
"I'm not fat. I'm just pleasantly plump,"
muddled #19."Oh please, we had to widen the front door six inches just to hall ya to the testing range," mumbled #17 as Dr.Gero began to remove the absorbers off his hands.
"Dr.Gero, #17 is picking on me. Make him stop!!!!!"
whimpered #19."#17........."
"He's such a big baby," spoke #18 as she pushed a lock of artificial blond hair.
"Am not!!"
"Are too.""AM NOT!!"
"ARE TOO!!""WILL YOU TWO HUSH UP!! I feel like I'm baby-sitting you, rather then reconfiguring you. #19, you and my upcoming #20 model will be left with the energy absorbers in case #17 and #18 need the opposition needs to be weakened.
DAY SEVEN
Bulma stood in front of the mirror. Last day before she has to have the baby inside her. Her small black dress that she normally had for parties was on. She knew she won't be this way for months. In a way though, she has grown so attached to the baby. Poor Vegeta. She felt a bit sorry for him. Pride was the thing that meant the most to him; and its taken a serious beating since she became pregnant.
"*sigh* Well, back to the hospital," she mumbled as she walked towards her closet to get changed into some maternal clothes. She was suprised that the chemicals that her father gave her didn't made her sick. Although she could do without the half a dozen needles each night, it would be well worth it to see her hubby's face when he gets to pass the child back to her.
Back at the hospital..........
"Vegeta?"
"NO, You will NOT touch my stomach just to feel it fire another ki blast," said Vegeta as he searched for the TV remote.
"PLEASE!!!!!"
"You can touch Bulma's belly when she has the little brat in her."
"Okay."
Vegeta wheezed. He already felt overexerted and he hasn't really done anything yet. The child was draining his energy, more and more everyday. Dr.Briefs told him that by the time they get through with Bulma, they will be able give the child healthy doses of energy from a generator so that it won't suck her dry of what little energy she has.
"Mr. Vegeta, your wife is here. We will be taking one more ultrasound before we proceed on the transfer," replied a nurse as she quietly opened the door.
"Finally," he murmured as Bulma walked in.
"Hey sexy," she joked as she looked down at his swelling stomach.
"............."
"*sigh* Still the same Vegeta. I'd think you'd change after holding something that we created..... our own joy and happiness."
"Nah, that only happens in sappy fics. NOW BRING ME TO THAT DAMN ULTRA-THING-A-MA-JIG THING!! The sooner I get this thing out of me, and the sooner I get out of this room with Kakorot!!! That damn jigglypuff's singing is driving me CRAZY!!!!"
"But its so cute. Wanna hear it again?" asked Goku as he pressed the a button on his Gameboy.
*Jiggggggllllyyyy pufff, jigggllllyyyyyyyy pufffff *BOOM*
Smoke rose from Vegeta's hand as it fired a ki blast and fried the piece of plastic.
Goku began to grow teary eyed as Bulma wheeled Vegeta out of the room. His eyes welled as he turned towards the melted shards of plastic. All of a sudden, they lit up.
"Oh well, I'll just play my N64 version!!" he smiled as he pulled out the system and began to frantically hook it up to the TV.
In the Ultrasound Room.....
"So why are we in here now?" asked Vegeta as the nurse placed more of the cold gel on him.
"Well, your, wife figured it was time you knew the gender of your child."
"Well you might as well save the $360 bill. Its gonna be a boy," he replied.
"How do you know?" asked Bulma as she cocked her head in his stubbornness.
"Because I carried this thing for about a week. If I say its a boy. ITS A BOY!!"
"Well, 'I' carried it for '24' weeks!!"
"Yeah, when it was about the size of a pea, and had the brain of Kakorot."
"Look, just don't be stubborn. Let the woman prove to you that its gonna be a girl and...."
"IT IS NOT A GIRL!!!"
"Ummm, Mrs.Briefs? He's right. It ain't a girl. It looks like its gonna be a boy..... with what looks like a tail growing from the back."
"Told you. My Saiyan sense is very accurate." Vegeta said smugly.
"Oh well." she grinned, "I got a good idea on what to name the baby. I always kinda wanted to name a baby this name."
"What?"
"Let's call him 'Goku'."
"WE'RE NOT NAMING OUR SON AFTER KAKOROT!!!" Vegeta yelled out.
"Yes, we are!" Bulma exclaimed, "He's the reason we met! I mean, he did attract you to Earth... and he did save your life from Krillan."
Vegeta frowned and then he said, "We're still not calling him 'Goku'."
"It's not like that you will call Goku and baby Goku by the same name."
"We're calling him Vegeta."
"No Goku."
"Look, lets just wait until you pop this thing out and then we'll name the brat."
"Fine."
"But his name will be Vegeta."
"I HEARD THAT!!!!!!!"
Our fight over what our future son's name lasted months on end. You should have seen my face when I finally got out of that blasted hospital without that brat. Bulma's sudden pains were gone. I thought it was gonna be on easy streak from then on.... you know, Bulma goes to hospital at the end of the 9 months.... Bulma delivers baby, give it a name, yadda yadda yadda. Unfortunately......
Eight and a half weeks later.....on Thanksgiving Day.....
At the Son's residence........
"Oh Bulma, so glad you could come for dinner!!" spoke Chi Chi as she opened the door as Vegeta followed afterwards.
"HEY VEGETA!! WOW, I never thought you liked wearing ties," said Goku as Vegeta turned a bright red.
"I don't....."
The dinner table was lavished with food. Enough to feed forty men.....or three Saiyans, one woman, and Chi Chi. Gohan carried the huge turkey and placed it on the table.
The two families sat side by side.
"Gohan, since you are the youngest... would you like to say grace, son?" asked Goku.
"Sure dad, Ummm, Dear Kami, bless all that lives, bless those who we've never met and our eternal respect for the Z-Fighters who have fallen in combat. And, I'll give you the 10 bucks I owe you next week....."
A bolt of lightning came down from the sky and struck a tree.
".....umm, make that tomorrow."
"LET'S EAT!!!" shouted Goku as he took his hand and karate chopped the bird in two. Goku grabbed one side while to everyone's surprise, so Bulma grabbed the other.
"My god, woman, YOU'RE GONNA EAT MORE THEN I WILL!!"
Bulma blushed, but suddenly grabbed her stomach.
"....vegeta...." Vegeta turned towards her as she began to take heavy breaths. He saw this at those weird classes he had to take with her.
"...no.... BUT ITS ONLY EIGHT AND A HALF MONTHS!!!"
".....vegeta..... its time......"
A pale body, with a long tail watched the group..... and smiled. The hour of Freeza is about to arise.
Narrator: Oh my, looks like Vegeta's gonna be a father early then expected. But what is up with Freeza's third Cousin Twice Removed? What does he want with Vegeta and Bulma's son? Find out, in the final part of this long(and virtually pointless) series. The 9 Month's Saga: ITS LABOR TIME!!!
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