Title: The Answer Is Out There
Disclaimer: I have just three words for you guys and gals out there: THEY'RE NOT MINE!!!!!!
Ch.11
Exhaustion had never been a stranger to Scully. Since before her days at the FBI, sleepless nights and long hours were her friends. This type of exhaustion was different. It was the strangest, most confused brand of tiredness, one she couldn't even identify. Her mind raced, trying to absorb new information at a fury pace and place it in some semblance of logic. Not that it was working, but she kept trying.
Then there were the exercises she had been put through. The technical aspect of the odd "downloads" she had endured was wasted on Scully, but the effects were real enough. Day one of the training had started out soft and ended with a complete sucker punch to her confidence. The new techniques, things she knew and could do were astounding. Somewhere in the back of her mind, Scully knew that there was an explanation for this process. The downloaded information was impressed upon her brain in such a complete manner as to suggest somehow these outsiders had found a way to utilize the remaining eighty-five to ninety percent of brain mass that would have not have been used otherwise. That explanation worked well, and Scully had yet to see it proved wrong, so she clung to it.
Part of the exhaustion, part of what made it so strange was that she would exercise for hours and when she woke up she was sore, as the hours training should and did bruise her, but she also woke to a new stiffness, the rigidity of sitting completely still for all those hours. This dichotomy wrecked her internal balance for the first few weeks and left her in this perpetual state of tiredness for the weeks afterwards. The crew never seemed to notice. Scully had watched Neo get up from a session, head straight for the mess hall, then come back to repeat the whole session over with Mulder without so much as a pause.
Mulder. He was looking much better, day-by-day. Since observing Scully's proficiency in medical knowledge and skill, Morpheus had appointed her as Mulder's physician, and emergency doctor...just in case. Scully hadn't minded, neither had Mulder, and slowly, he had recovered. The religious awe with which Mulder absorbed all the crew had to share was frightening to Scully, but she had never really expected anything else from her partner. The sense of truth in what they had been told left nothing to question. There weren't any doubts that Morpheus was holding back or making up one grandiose lie to cover an even more grandiose truth
The little personal attachments were working well. Morpheus seemed to be like the big brother of the entire group, and it was clear that the rest of the ship both loved and respected him. Tank had revealed himself as something of a practical joker, as well as an all around good-humored man. He was the only one aboard, as far as Scully had seen, that didn't possess the multiple steel holes in his person. Eventually, Scully planned to ask, but for now, even after all this time, she was content to leave things as they were.
Trinity and Neo were definitely sweet on one another, but not in so sickening a way as to be annoying. Mostly, they were rather private about their love, rarely sharing much more than a quick kiss in front of the others. Scully had to keep from laughing every time she saw them together because of something Mulder had commented one day.
"My best friend in high school used to say something about couples who aren't big on public displays of affection."
"And what would that be?"
"He always said that they must be screwing one another's brains out so much behind closed doors that holding hands is all they can manage to do afterwards...or without going at it again."
Regardless of Mulder's assumption, Scully appreciated Neo and Trinity's reserve. It made her own painful lack of a relationship less obvious. Trinity had gotten to be Scully's best friend among the crew, especially as they worked together in a doctor-patient capacity. Of all the crew, Trinity's personality in the real world was the closest to her work personality. She was silent, asking the right questions when necessary, making a joke or two in front of Mulder, and always following orders she was given. It made Scully's job that much easier. Trinity tended to be more open with her doctor, and, Scully suspected, with Neo, but otherwise, she was the Trinity that Scully and Mulder had first known.
Compared to Trinity, Neo was nearly an open book, which wasn't saying much. His face could be as serene and blank or as expressive as he chose. Neo was pretty mum about something Scully could only guess at. Whatever it was seemed to embarrass him, but otherwise, Neo was pretty open, answering most of Scully's questions. He had even told her about his own experience with implants, what he called a bug. The horrific description alone was enough to make Scully thank her lucky stars that these AIs had only set up a phony abduction for her.
One day, she had managed to work most of the truth from him surrounding the events outlined in their former investigation.
"What exactly did happen, Neo?" Neo explained the circumstances that lead up to the clash at the Heart O'the City hotel, with Scully taking mental notes, checking his story against the facts. When it came to the actual shooting, Neo slowed his train of thought, as if he had to be careful what to tell Scully.
"Yeah, that was me." Neo toed a grating in the floor, concentration on wedging his boot between the wires instead of looking Scully in the eye. Scully didn't want to push, especially if the moment was painful, but the pressing need to know overrode her politeness.
"How did you escape? If these agents had you pinned down, not to mention mortally wounded, why would they let you get to the phone?" Neo never took his eyes off the floor.
"I didn't die. I made it, does it matter how?"
"It does to me. I'm sorry if this isn't your favorite subject, but it could be important."
"You could say that," Neo muttered lowly, which Scully barely caught. When he spoke up, his words lacked all sincerity and that sense of truth that she had become accustomed to hearing. "I beat them...enough to get around them. Maybe they were off that day. 'Scuse me, Scully." Neo walked away, not bothering to actually wait for Scully's permission or okay. As she watched him leave, Scully could see some immense strain and tenseness in his upper shoulders. What had made him so upset?
"Neo's not comfortable talking about that particular incident, Miss Scully." She turned to see Morpheus coming up from another corridor, wiping his hands on an old rag.
"Mind if I ask why?" Morpheus shook his head.
"Not at all. I'd be happy to tell you, if you'd like." Morpheus gestured for her to follow him to the mess hall, the impromptu conference hall on the Neb. It was empty, ready for this conversation. No sooner had Scully taken her seat than Morpheus had started to speak, even as he closed the door.
"Neo was at the hotel, Miss Scully..."
"Please, just Scully."
"Scully then," Morpheus smiled and took a seat opposite her. "He was there...no, that won't do." Morpheus thoughtfully scratched his chin as he tried to explain the event. Scully would believe what he had to say, but the problem seemed to be how best to say it so as not to confuse her.
"Why don't I tell you what we found and you fill in the blanks?" Morpheus nodded gratefully and gestured for her to continue. "I take it the 'exit' was at this hotel...perhaps that frayed wire in room 303?" A nod and she continued. "From our evidence, the shooter was in that room, shot twice, then advanced into the doorway to finish a full clip." Another nod. "Who was the shooter?"
"The now-defunct Agent Smith, and may he rest in hell." Morpheus grated. The name Smith had been in both their files and in the story Neo had told her, the story about Morpheus' torture at the hands of that particular agent.
"Very well. So, Agent Smith shot Neo more than ten times, but Neo managed to escape, and take out Agent Smith at the same time?"
"More or less, yes."
"How? Don't expect me to buy any bullshit about Neo not being seriously wounded enough to have been slowed down. After all you've shown me about these agents, I know better. And more than that, I have other evidence. First, one bullet is more than enough to seriously injure a man's chances of escape. Second, his chances against agents were bad enough as it was. Third, Neo wasn't shot once; he was shot ten plus times. Fourth, at least six of those shots hit either major arteries or veins, judging by the blood splatter he left on the wall. Fifth, the smeared blood indicated that Neo either fell or slumped over, dragging along the wall and leaving a track of blood as he went. Sixth, if someone slumps over they are dead or close to death. Seventh, call me crazy, but I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that the agents didn't and wouldn't wait for Neo to recover."
"Quite perceptive," Morpheus chuckled hollowly. "You are correct, Mi...Scully. I'd like to hear your thesis on what happened first, if you don't mind." Scully stared at Morpheus with her jaw halfway open. She hadn't expected this tactic. If anything, she had thought Morpheus would have either ended the conversation or else explained everything.
"I...I don't know."
"That bothers you, doesn't it?"
"Yes...yes. It always has." Morpheus nodded and leaned closer to whisper his next words.
"Then you should know exactly how Neo feels." He leaned back, letting his words take effect. Scully's unfocused gaze fell to her lap. Touché.
"I still want to know what happened." Scully was determined. She wouldn't apologize, not when she was this close.
"Neo died, Scully, just like your 'evidence' proved." That was it. No more words stole across the table from Morpheus' lips to her ears.
"What?" Nothing else came to her tongue.
"Just what I said, I'm afraid. For about two minutes or so, Neo was dead." Scully processed this revelation slowly, placing the pieces together before Morpheus could leave, stranding her with only half the mystery solved.
"How...I don't believe it." Morpheus laughed, genuine mirth in his voice.
"Funny, Neo said the same thing once. Trust me, you'll learn to eliminate that particular phrase from your repertoire...eventually."
"How?" Morpheus stopped laughing, took a deep breath and began. The entire history of the One, his life, his death, the Oracle's prophecy, and his resurrection in Neo. Scully listened, trying to suspend her incredulity. Morpheus played keen observer, not offering her anything more.
"So, now you know."
***********************
And so she did. Scully retreated into her room, not long after, still puzzling the whole story over. Mulder passed her with a 'hey' as he headed for another session of training with Trinity. Scully looked guiltily at Trinity, but averted her eyes before the other women knew she had been looking. To her horror, Scully nearly ran right into Neo as she was going to her room. He smiled, and apologized, made some flippant remark about the cramped nature of the ship, and headed to the monitors to help Trinity. He made no signal to indicate that he was still thinking about what they had discussed earlier.
Scully watched his retreating form with a newfound awe, one that might have even rivaled her partner's. Everything Morpheus had told her said that Neo was some almost god-like force in the matrix, but on the outside, he seemed to be ashamed of what he could do. Why? Scully couldn't fathom a reason. She made a mental note to mention it to Mulder later.
Right now, she needed to think this out.
***********************
"Scully? You missed lunch, so I thought I'd drop by to see if you were okay." Trinity's voice was tender and full of concern, calling to Scully from the door. Scully sat up on her bed, waving at Trinity to come in. Trinity closed the door and took a seat at the edge of Scully's bed.
"Why didn't anyone tell me about this when I signed on?" Without a question, Trinity knew what Scully meant.
"You weren't ready. I don't think you are now."
"This is important. I can't be much help if I don't know these things, and there is little point to me being here if I can't help."
"On the contrary, you've helped a lot without knowing everything. And Morpheus told you, didn't he? Isn't that enough?" Scully sighed, her irritation subsiding. Yes, Trinity was right. It hadn't been her place, regardless of whether she had been ready to hear or not.
"So, I know now. Why don't you fill me in on the rest?" Trinity spread her arms wide, an open gesture.
"What do you want to know?" Scully closed her eyes and thought about it for a moment.
"Start from the beginning, I guess."
"Which beginning do you mean?" Scully's open flipped open with an irritated glare that she leaved at Trinity.
"What's with you? Why can't you just answer my goddamned question!?!" Trinity's eyes narrowed, focusing on Scully like she was the lowliest bug on the ship. "Because you're asking really sensitive questions about the man I love, that's why. I have every right to question your motives. If Neo doesn't want to share, he doesn't have to. If I don't, I won't. Understood?" Scully nodded, still rankled. "Try asking for exactly what you want to know and I'll decide whether or not you should hear it." Scully stared at Trinity in surprise. There had to be a question that would throw Trinity off enough for her to spill something accidentally...anything...
"Why do you love Neo? Is it because he's this One person?" Shock and hurt were plain on Trinity's face. As soon as she had said it, Scully regretted it. "Look, I'm sorry. I'm still trying to get my mind around the implications of this...I mean, this is more unusual than even everything else so far." Trinity worked on summoning a faint smile.
"You're not doing so bad, Scully. Just give it time."
"I just don't understand how he can do what he can...and just because. There's no explanation?"
"Not as yet."
"Damn." Trinity's smile crept a little wider.
"Believe me, I know that feeling only too well." Scully sighed and threw up her hands.
"Then I give up. I guess I'll have to adopt Mulder's live-and-let-live policy." Trinity chuckled once.
"Mulder wasn't too much better when Morpheus told him. He found out before you, Scully, but his reaction was pretty much the same." Scully joined in with the pleasant, soft laughter.
"I guess it's Neo's appearance. Mulder has a hard time giving handsome guys their due. You should've seen his description of the vampire sheriff we ran into." Trinity looked at Scully with uncomprehending surprise and mirth. "Mulder insisted he had huge buck teeth, mostly, I think, because I kinda liked him. Mulder had to tease." Trinity smiled and nodded. "On the other hand, it must be a pretty good disguise. No one would think twice about Neo." Trinity's smile morphed to a smirk.
"You'd be surprised what he's capable of." Scully stifled a laugh at that hidden meaning.
"So, will we ever get to see it, or are we just supposed to believe?"
"What would it take to convince you?"
"I'm good right now, so let's take it easy on me, okay?"
"Not a chance, Scully. We're taking you back inside." Scully paled at the thought. The world she had called home for the past few months was more comforting than the world she had known for thirty years. The thought of returning scared her.
"Why? What can I do there?"
"That's not the issue. The Oracle wants to see you and your partner. She does not request to see everyone, Scully. This is special." Scully blinked at Trinity. As she did, an entirely different image came to mind; Trinity was replaced with a new vision, brought on by an intuitive leap.
"You've been to see her." Trinity nodded, almost pleased. "So have Neo, and Morpheus too, right?" Trinity smiled, all the confirmation Scully needed. "They're important. You're important. What am I?" Trinity's smile disappeared, but her friendly aura did not. She said only one more word before she left, one word to reassure Scully, to answer her question. Scully repeated the answer to herself after Trinity had left.
"What am I?" She asked again. Trinity's answer stood alone, without explanation.
"Vital."
End of Part 11