Things That Go 'Mwahaha' in the Night
~Part 3: Sugar and Spice and Everything That Scares Heero~
Starseeker: *Sigh* Anyone got an Aspirin?
Everyone: *Remembering various references to Aspirin in other fics…* AAAAHHHHH!!!
Starseeker: What?! My head hurts!
Duo: Yeah, right! And next you'll be giving us parts in some stupid play!
Starseeker: No…not in this fic. *Evil grin* But…maybe next time…
Everyone: AAAAHHHHH!!!
Starseeker: Watch it. I can call any character from any fandom right here and now.
*Everyone whimpers like scared little puppies.*
*Starseeker shrugs and plays Gameboy again*
Starseeker: Hmm…this looks suspiciously familiar…hey Catherine?
Mini-Catherine: *Still stuck in the Gameboy* Yeah?
Starseeker: Where'd you get this Gameboy?
Mini-Catherine: I, uh, umm…
Starseeker: I knew it! YOU STOLE MY ATOMIC PURPLE GAMEBOY, didn't you?!
Mini-Catherine: Well, I-
Starseeker: I KNEW IT!!
Mini-Catherine: I didn't think you'd notice…and I was gonna return it when this fic was done…I promise!
Starseeker: You didn't think I'd notice that my Gameboy was missing for A WHOLE WEEK?!
Mini-Catherine: *sweatdrops* No…
Starseeker: Well, it doesn't matter now. *Plays Zelda DX some more* AAAHHH! I died again!
~*~
Relena: So what do we do for the rest of the night?
Duo: I think there's a Twister board around here somewhere…
*Heero hits Duo on the back of the head*
Duo: What?!
*Meanwhile, Zechs wakes up*
Heero: YAAAAH!
Zechs: …ow…..
Noin: Are you still hypnotized?
Zechs: Does it look like I'm hypnotized?
Noin: No…but you didn't look like you were before, either.
Zechs: Oh. Well I'm not.
*Relena gets up and goes over to Starseeker*
Relena: *Whispering* When do I get my making out scene with Heero?
Starseeker: Later…you'll see.
Relena: Okie dokie!
*Wufei and Sally are locked in an intense card game.*
Wufei: Hmm… *Looks at his cards.*
Sally: *Concentrating very hard.* Hmm…
Wufei: Um…
Sally: So…?
Wufei: Got any fives?
Sally: Go fish.
Wufei: INJUSTICE!! *Takes a card from the deck.*
Sally: Got any nines?
Wufei: Um…uh…INJUSTICE!! *Hands Sally 3 cards.*
Sally: Cool! Got any twos?
Wufei: Hah hah! Weak woman! Go fish!
Sally: *Pulls a two from the deck* Yay!
Wufei: NOOO!!
Sally: Got any…uh, tens?
Wufei: Go fish!
*Sally draws another card.*
Wufei: Got any sevens?
Sally: Go fish. *Evil grin.* Got any sevens?
*Wufei silently hands over his 3 sevens. Sally throws the last of her cards onto the table in pairs.*
Sally: I win again!
Wufei: But…but…INJUSTICE!
*Dorothy is playing the long-forgotten green Gameboy*
Dorothy: Jeez, what is with that guy and his 'injustice' crap?!
Wufei: I HEARD THAT, WOMAN!
*Dorothy sticks out her tongue at Wufei and continues playing the Gameboy*
Mini-Trowa: Help meeee… *Mutters* Wufei I could handle…but NOT HER!
Dorothy: I heard that!
Starseeker: This is starting to get kinda repetitive.
Mini-Trowa: Grumble, grumble… *Sits down in the middle of the screen with his arms crossed, and he refuses to move.*
Dorothy: I'll turn it off…
Mini-Trowa: Okay, okay! *Gets up and starts playing as Mario again.*
Dorothy: That's better!
*Meanwhile…*
*Hilde walks over and sits next to Duo, who is sitting across from Relena and Heero.*
Hilde: Whatcha doin'?
Duo: Nothin'…
Hilde: Isn't there a game we can play?
Duo: Well, I think there's a Twister mat somewhere around here, but Relena and Heero don't wanna play. Hey, there's Monopoly, too! …I think….
Hilde: Let's go find Monopoly then.
*Hilde and Duo leave to find Monopoly.*
Relena: *Thinking* (Heero and me…er, Heero and I are alone…in a creepy old house…this could work!)
Heero: *Thinking* (Uh-oh…I'd know that psychotic look anywhere… she's up to something. But what?)
Relena: (I wonder what he's thinking…)
Heero: (I wonder what she's planning...)
Relena: (He'll never suspect me…that's it, Relena, just keep acting normal.)
Heero: (What a pathetic excuse for acting! She looks less normal when she's trying to be normal than when she's being normal!)
Starseeker: (Do they know I can read their thoughts?)
Heero and Relena: (Oops…any ways…)
Relena: (I wonder what he's thinking…)
Heero: (I wonder what she's planning…)
*Dorothy has stopped playing Gameboy but has left it on because if the Gameboy is turned off, Trowa will be lost forever.*
Dorothy: *Sigh* This is boring…
Relena: When are Duo and Hilde coming back with the Monopoly game?
Heero: I don't think they're getting the game…
Relena: Then what…oh.
Heero: Yeah.
Relena: I'm getting kind of hungry…does someone want to come with me to the kitchen?
*Relena sees no volunteers.*
Heero: Okay, fine, I'll go.
Relena: (Yipee!)
*Relena and Heero walk into the kitchen.*
Relena: So…
Heero: …
*Relena walks to the fridge*
Relena: Hmm…hey...! What's this? *Pulls out a can.*
Heero: …uh-oh…
Relena: S…so…sod…sod-a. Sod-a? What is sod-a?
Heero: Uh-oh…
Relena: *Opens the soda and looks at it.* Oh, it's a drink! *Starts drinking it*
Heero: NO! *Dives for the soda can but misses by three feet and hits a cabinet.* Ow…
Relena: This is good… and bubbly…
Heero: Oh, no…we're in trouble.
*Relena continues to drink, then gets into the cabinets.*
Heero: *Gets up.* I'd better make sure she doesn't go nuts…
*As if on cue, Heero ducks as he's almost hit by her (empty) flying soda can. He grabs it and sees how much caffeine was in it. He doesn't notice Relena pull out another soda and gulp it down…and another…and another…*
Heero: Oh no…that's a LOT of caffeine! *Hears a strange giggling noise* I'm too late!
*There's a puff of smoke, and from it comes…Chibi-Relena!*
Heero: Eeep…
Starseeker: (Heero doesn't sound right when he says 'eeep'…let's try another word.)
Heero: *Shrugs* Sure. F-
Starseeker: LANGUAGE!!
Heero: Fine… SH-
Starseeker: *Whining* Heeeeerooooo!!
Heero: What's wrong with that?! *Grumble* Okay, okay. Crap!! How's that?
*Heero doesn't hear an answer because Chibi-Relena charges at him and shoves him down.*
Chibi-Relena: Hiya Heero!
Heero: We're in trouble.
Chibi-Relena: *Giggles* Whatcha doin'?
Heero: *Grumbling* Waiting for you to get off me, you hyperactive munchkin child.
Chibi-Relena: *Eyes get teary* You don't like me? *In a surprised voice.* You hurt my feelings! *Sniffle, sniffle*
Heero: …
Chibi-Relena: Aren't you sorry?
Heero: No.
*Chibi-Relena makes puppy eyes at Heero*
Chibi-Relena: Even just a little bit sorry?
Heero: …no.
Chibi-Relena: *Starts to cry dramatically.* WAAAAAAHHH!
Starseeker: (Where have I heard that before…?)
*Chibi-Relena's tears start to soak Heero's shirt.*
Heero: Fine, fine! I'm sorry! Are you happy now?
*Chibi-Relena instantly cheers up and nods.*
Chibi-Relena: Now will you give me a kiss and make it better?
Heero: You have got to be kidding.
*Meanwhile…with Treize and Lady Une*
Treize: Has anyone noticed that we've totally gone off the script?
Starseeker: *From out of nowhere* Yeah, but no one cares.
Lady Une: I liked my part! It's fun to be the snappy, snarling bi-
Starseeker: Language! Sheesh, you guys have a bunch of dirty mouths!
*Treize and Lady Une sweatdrop*
Treize: I've had enough of this. I need a drink.
Lady Une: Me too. A strong one.
Starseeker: Maybe you should try the wine cellar.
Treize: Cool! Which way?
Starseeker: There's a door to it in the kitchen.
*Treize and Lady Une head into the kitchen and see Chibi-Relena on top of Heero*
Treize: …I don't want to know.
Lady Une: Let's just go.
Treize: Thank God these kids aren't old enough to drink.
Lady Une: Really…
*Lady Une and Treize go into the wine cellar and the door closes behind them. They turn on a light.*
Treize: Wow, this place is big!
Lady Une: Very big…
*Treize and Lady Une each select a bottle of wine and decide to turn the light back off for fun…we'll leave the rest to the imagination.*
If you've forgotten some people, here's what everyone's doing.
Heero: Trying to calm down Chibi-Relena
Relena: (Chibi-Relena) Currently crazy from caffeine and bugging Heero.
Duo: *Ahem* -ing with Hilde
Hilde: Doing the same thing with Duo
Trowa: Trapped in a green Gameboy
Catherine: Trapped in STARSEEKER'S purple Gameboy
Quatre: *Sniff, sniff* Missing…
Dorothy: Sitting around…
Wufei: Playing Go Fish with Sally and losing.
Sally: Playing Go Fish with Wufei and kicking his butt.
Zechs: Talking to Noin
Noin: Talking to Zechs
Treize: *Ahem* -ing with Lady Une…while drinking wine
Lady Une: Doing the same thing with Treize…while drinking wine
Starseeker: Being a pain in the butt while getting into everyone's conversation.
*With all that said, we'll start part 4.*
~*~
Um…yeah, Gundam boys and girls being nasty…but the next part *should* get better! Hope you liked part 3! If you have an idea for part 4 then please tell me! Or e-mail it to me at Starseeker__1@hotmail.com!