An aching pain or A silent madness
Ch 6 Cyke, mini me, and Ev
Summary and synopsis: Wolverine died while protecting Jubilee from Sabretooth. Jubilee killed Sabretooth and is now staying at wolverine's cabin in the woods. Sean flew up and is there with her. If you want a better idea of what is going on then read the summary at the beginning of chapter 5. Or you could read the whole story again, if you have time. I hate trying to summarize what happens in these chapters. Some of the events may not be totally accurate with the marvel timeline. Like Cyclops dieing from the nano bomb.
Jubilee slept for eight hours straight. When she woke up, she was at least a little less fatigued. The pain of losing Wolvie and the others still nagged at her though.
"Hey sleeping beauty, do you want some food, asked Sean? It's not five star cooking but it won't kill you like Emma's.
"I'm starved. I don't remember the last time I ate. Jubilee sat at the small table as Sean set down a bowl of stew. Jubilee ate it ravenously. "Mmmmm this is good Sean. Where did you learn to cook?
"I haven't always been an X-man lass. I was on my own for quite a while and after the first six months Top Ramen and Macaroni and Cheese get old. You quickly learn to cook at that point.
"Did you learn any other useful things?"
"I can wash dishes and do my own laundry."
"Gee Sean you're a regular house wife."
"Just call me Betty Crocker."
Jubilee snickered slightly at that, "oh yeah I can see it now. You cooking the meals and cleaning the house, sure, she giggled again."
"I was getting worried that I never hear that laugh again, it lights up the room."
"Thanks for staying, Sean. So you can see the ghosts now?"
Yes, Heather thought that might happen. You probably lashed out with your latent psi gift and made a mind link. Not a very strong one, otherwise we'd be able to hear each others thoughts and I'd be able to talk to the ghosts.
Sean you know that when the ghosts come back this time. It's going to be harder for you. I mean you didn't know my folks or Cynjen. Everyone else you are going to know. I can't deal with the pain you fell about their deaths and mine. It's okay if you want to leave now. I don't know if I am ready to tell anyone about the Zero Tolerance stuff, ghosts or you.
"I stuck it out with you this long. I'm not going now. Any guilt I felt about those deaths doesn't matter; this isn't my time it's yours. Besides I have dealt with my feeling about all of that, even Everett's death. Jubilee you haven't told anyone about what happen with Bastion? I always assumed that you had talked to Logan about it.
"Nope," she replied flatly.
"You don't have to be strong for me. I just want you to be you, the real you."
"I can't, Sean. If I am not the happy little firecracker, who will be?"
"We don't expect you to be like that all the time, do we?"
"Most of the time, I get two sad days a year."
"I never really thought about it, lass. But you're right the few times you haven't been the happy little girl the team didn't know what to do."
"Well somebody had to break thought to Wolvie. And I make a nice contrast to the angst that is the Summer's clan. I don't regret it. It's just somedays are harder than others. She paused for a moment to look Sean in the eyes. "I want you to promise me something."
"What?"
"I may say things, things that the X-men don't know, stuff about Zero tolerance. You can't tell them Sean, it would hurt them to know."
"I promise not to tell them lass, now what's this big secret.
"It's all tied into what the ghosts of Cyke and myself blame me for. Cyke blame me disrupting the team, and distracting Wolvie. And the ghost of me, blames me for not trying harder to save myself."
What exactly do they blame you for? What happened?"
"Well Cyke said I distract Wolvie and the team. They hadn't expected to find me wandering out in the desert. But he didn't know the whole story.
"What is the story Jubilee?"
"Well you know that the X-men were captured briefly and taken to the Hulkbuster base, where I was being held."
"I had read that in the reports yes."
"Well while escaping they got trapped in a room with no way out. As they were preparing themselves to face the onslaught of Sentinels a panel opened, one that led to the surface. A lucky break for them that a door opened right when they needed it, wasn't it."
"Did they think Bastion was stupid, that he hit the wrong button and let them out, she cried! Sean if you were trapped in a enemy base and suddenly a way out magically appeared what would you think?"
"I'd think that I had a friend in the control room."
"And that would be logical wouldn't it. But did the mighty X-men think that no. I opened that door for them while in a straight jacket after having been tortured for over a month. I smashed my head into the control panel repeatedly to try and hit the right button. I watched them on the security screens as they ran out, happy to be free. And then, the ghost accuses me of being a distraction. When Wolvie came and found me in the desert I had twisted my ankle in the dark, and was cornered by a Prime Sentinel. It wasn't like I didn't need a little help right then. When Mustang's programming was activated I blinded him. Allowing him to regain a grip on his humanity. I saved them all twice; I couldn't be everywhere though. I wasn't a distraction to the team. I helped them I really did. Then that nano bomb hit Cyke and there was just enough time to throw me at the Academy before speeding off to Salem center. Did they ask me how I got out there? Or did they wonder about the bruises and what was left of the straight jacket? No they didn't barely even slowed the plane down to throw me off."
"And no one knows any of this, Jubilee you have kept this all inside?"
"What was I supposed to say. I hope you enjoyed your visit to Bastion's base had you stuck around a little longer you might have found me. It was after releasing them that I think a little piece of me died. Bastion was not thrilled that I let his prisoners go. He took special care in beating me that night. What should I have done, not let the X-men go to save myself?" I let them go and lost two pieces of me in the process, my faith that the team would always come through when I needed them. And my naïve innocence about the world, that under it all people don't hate mutants they're just scared and don't understand."
"Jubilee, Zero tolerance took something from everyone. I had no idea that it took that much from you."
"It did, and with Cyke dead I didn't think that my pain was the greatest so I kept quiet." As she said that two tears rolled down he face and two figures materialized on either side of her. Cyclops and the younger Jubilee leaned and each brushed a tear off her cheek. Cradling these in their hands they stepped back a faded away.
Ev Story
"You know it was you they wanted." The voice made a cold statement of fact. "That fire in your room was just a warning."
Sean head shot up at this. He carefully scanned the room, and his eyes settled on his, former student Everett Thomas. "Ev do you know what you are saying to the poor girl."
The vision of Everett seemed not to notice Sean's words. "So Jubes do you feel better now. I could never love a silly immature girl like you. And then because I'm in love with Monet you get me killed. Those boys never saw my mutant power, how could they my power require a mutant to be around." They wanted you. They just assumed I was a mutant because I hung out with you."
"I asked about you when you weren't with Mr. Cassady. He sent Monet to look for you."
"But I am not the one with the ability to explode matter on a sub atomic level. You could have just changed the molecular structure of the bombs and rendered them harmless."
Jubilee sighed, "I suppose I could have but I don't have that much control on my power. I could have done that with the bombs I saw, maybe, but not all of them. That's part of the reason I when down to Gen X, to become more proficient with my powers. I've only touched the power you spoke of twice and both times the building blew up too. I am sorry that I didn't have enough control of my mutant powers to save you. I am sorry they scare me so much to use them. And I am sorry that I wasn't more careful about hiding my abilities."
"But Ev what would you have done if they had caught me instead, what make you think you would have been safe. I was always protecting you guys. Ever notice I was the only one that got really hurt on our missions. It wasn't because you thought I was a klutz. It's because I made sure that I took the hits. Ev you couldn't have stayed safe forever, and you couldn't have kept you powers a secret forever. I am just sorry that I couldn't have kept you alive a little longer. The ghost of Ev vanished a quickly as it came.
And now Sean had to speak. "Is all this true, lass?"
Jubilee nodded, "I won't lose another family because I couldn't do anything Sean, never again. If it mean sacrificing my self for the life of one of my friends then I'll do it. No regrets even if it means more time in the med lab.
Jubilee I had no idea this is how you felt about all of us. I knew your ties to The X-men and Gen X were strong, but I never imagined that they ran this deep. I assumed you felt that was about Wolverine but not all of us. It must tear you apart when the X-men go on a mission and your not their."
"It does. But that why I always tell stories about when I was with the X-men. Beside I call over there almost every other day. Just to check up on everyone. Drake is a huge gossip."