Disclaimer; as usual, it's all Joss', the WB's, and
Fox's. not mine.
Author's note: a warning, some of this conversation
comes almost verbatim from those I've had with
friends.... especially the email I just got from one
who thinks she broke her tailbone....
Happy Drugs
by Casix Thistlebane
"Hey, watch it with those things!"
"Shhhhh!"
"It's not my fault you nearly brained me with those
flowers!"
"Xander...."
"Sorry Willow. Is he awake?"
"Giles?"
"Mmmmmm?"
"Hey Giles. How are you feeling?"
"Good."
"Good he says. He nearly breaks his ass off, and all
he can say is 'good'."
"Xander...."
"Sorry again Willow,"
"I got you some flowers Giles,"
"Oh?"
"Yeah, and she nearly ended up putting me in here next
to you while she brought them in."
"They're.... big."
"I got the largest arrangement."
"Pretty."
"I'm sorry I broke you butt, Giles...."
"Hmmm?"
"You know, in the whole... battle... thing? I was
aiming for the vampire next to you. I guess the board
slipped."
"Ssssss'okay."
"Giles.... Are you sure you're okay?"
"Coul'n' be better, Buffy."
"Doesn't it HURT?!"
"Xander!"
"Hey, it's a valid question.... does it hurt?"
"Mmmm hm."
"You see, I told you it was valid. Giles,"
"Hmmmm?"
"Do you care?"
"About what?"
"The pain."
"Xander, stop pestering him."
"Shush, miss 'I'm going to bring him a lot of flowers
because I feel bad about breaking his butt', I'm
trying to assess here."
"Xander, if you don't shut up, I'm going to break YOUR
butt."
"Don' do that."
"Oh! Giles, I'm sorry, I didn't mean...."
"The wold is happy, Buffy. Don't make it not happy."
....
"Did he just say what I think he just said?"
"What, you mean about the world being happy?"
"Shiny, happy people....."
"Since when does Giles sing REM?"
"Since they've put the G-man on happy drugs, that's
when."
"Xander!"
"Didn't they give you happy drugs, G-man?"
"Mmmm. Good drugs. That's a really nice shirt,
Xander,"
"Thanks!"
"Look, Giles, maybe you should rest...."
"It's G-man, Buffy."
"What?!"
"You know, that shirt used to just be a tiny seed,
somewhere in Peru.... or Georgia?"
"Did he just ASK to be called G-man?"
"It's happy drugs, Buff, humor him."
"I love the print. That's Hawaiian, isn't it? I want
a Hawaiian shirt."
"Wow, those really are some drugs."
"Aren't they? I had to get some when I broke my
collar bone in seventh grade. It's good stuff."
"Buffy, you're hair looks really nice today."
"Um, thanks, Giles."
"I like what you did with the streaks."
"Yeahhhhhh,"
"I want my Hawaiian shirt to look just like Willow's
flowers...."
"Will do, G-Man."
"And have rainbows."
"Yep."
"And streaks, like Buffy's hair."
"Gotcha."
"And--"
"LOOK, Giles... G-man.... Ripper, whatever you wanna
be called right now, we really need to get going and,
um, study. Yeah."
"I don't need to study..."
"Come on, Xander,"
"Oh come on, just let me get a tape recorder...."
"Xander...."
"Oh fine. Feel better, G-man!"
"Bye Xander! Bye Willow! Bye Buffy! Isn't life
amazing?"
"Yes! Rest your butt, we'll be back when you're not
quite as stoned!"
*whump*
....
"They're such nice kids.... Stoned. Stoned, stoned,
stoned. I like that word. Stoned. I feel shiny."
The End
=====
Casix Thistlebane
Exhalted Archivist of all things Ficapaloozian
http://www.angelfire.com/yt/ficapalooza/
"There are no happy endings, because nothing ever ends."
--Schmendrick the Magician
Fox's. not mine.
Author's note: a warning, some of this conversation
comes almost verbatim from those I've had with
friends.... especially the email I just got from one
who thinks she broke her tailbone....
Happy Drugs
by Casix Thistlebane
"Hey, watch it with those things!"
"Shhhhh!"
"It's not my fault you nearly brained me with those
flowers!"
"Xander...."
"Sorry Willow. Is he awake?"
"Giles?"
"Mmmmmm?"
"Hey Giles. How are you feeling?"
"Good."
"Good he says. He nearly breaks his ass off, and all
he can say is 'good'."
"Xander...."
"Sorry again Willow,"
"I got you some flowers Giles,"
"Oh?"
"Yeah, and she nearly ended up putting me in here next
to you while she brought them in."
"They're.... big."
"I got the largest arrangement."
"Pretty."
"I'm sorry I broke you butt, Giles...."
"Hmmm?"
"You know, in the whole... battle... thing? I was
aiming for the vampire next to you. I guess the board
slipped."
"Ssssss'okay."
"Giles.... Are you sure you're okay?"
"Coul'n' be better, Buffy."
"Doesn't it HURT?!"
"Xander!"
"Hey, it's a valid question.... does it hurt?"
"Mmmm hm."
"You see, I told you it was valid. Giles,"
"Hmmmm?"
"Do you care?"
"About what?"
"The pain."
"Xander, stop pestering him."
"Shush, miss 'I'm going to bring him a lot of flowers
because I feel bad about breaking his butt', I'm
trying to assess here."
"Xander, if you don't shut up, I'm going to break YOUR
butt."
"Don' do that."
"Oh! Giles, I'm sorry, I didn't mean...."
"The wold is happy, Buffy. Don't make it not happy."
....
"Did he just say what I think he just said?"
"What, you mean about the world being happy?"
"Shiny, happy people....."
"Since when does Giles sing REM?"
"Since they've put the G-man on happy drugs, that's
when."
"Xander!"
"Didn't they give you happy drugs, G-man?"
"Mmmm. Good drugs. That's a really nice shirt,
Xander,"
"Thanks!"
"Look, Giles, maybe you should rest...."
"It's G-man, Buffy."
"What?!"
"You know, that shirt used to just be a tiny seed,
somewhere in Peru.... or Georgia?"
"Did he just ASK to be called G-man?"
"It's happy drugs, Buff, humor him."
"I love the print. That's Hawaiian, isn't it? I want
a Hawaiian shirt."
"Wow, those really are some drugs."
"Aren't they? I had to get some when I broke my
collar bone in seventh grade. It's good stuff."
"Buffy, you're hair looks really nice today."
"Um, thanks, Giles."
"I like what you did with the streaks."
"Yeahhhhhh,"
"I want my Hawaiian shirt to look just like Willow's
flowers...."
"Will do, G-Man."
"And have rainbows."
"Yep."
"And streaks, like Buffy's hair."
"Gotcha."
"And--"
"LOOK, Giles... G-man.... Ripper, whatever you wanna
be called right now, we really need to get going and,
um, study. Yeah."
"I don't need to study..."
"Come on, Xander,"
"Oh come on, just let me get a tape recorder...."
"Xander...."
"Oh fine. Feel better, G-man!"
"Bye Xander! Bye Willow! Bye Buffy! Isn't life
amazing?"
"Yes! Rest your butt, we'll be back when you're not
quite as stoned!"
*whump*
....
"They're such nice kids.... Stoned. Stoned, stoned,
stoned. I like that word. Stoned. I feel shiny."
The End
=====
Casix Thistlebane
Exhalted Archivist of all things Ficapaloozian
http://www.angelfire.com/yt/ficapalooza/
"There are no happy endings, because nothing ever ends."
--Schmendrick the Magician