Chapter 4: Questioning Hearts
The time Matt and Sora were spending together was good fun. Matt had taken her to the theaters, concerts, diners, and dance clubs, but they never once called it a 'date'. They were just two good friends goin' out to have some amusement. Sora was having such a good time, she nearly, but not quite, forgot about her pain. She held back her feelings that she and the blond boy, who was trying to amuse her, might have something more than friendship. She didn't want to hurt anyone again, especially not herself. Matt, himself, did not want to admit his feelings still. He was afraid that Sora might repeat the reactions of when Tai admitted his feelings to her. But he also had other reasons. Of all the Digidestined, Matt was always the one who would keep to himself and not let any indications of his emotion out, as he thought as a sign of his own weakness. But now, suddenly when he's around 'her' again, all these unpredicted thoughts and sentiments came flooding into his world. But he still didn't want to show it. If Sora did turn him down- well he just wasn't prepared to deal with any of the consequential feelings yet. In his mind, it was best to keep what they have now than throw it all away because of a 'feeling'.
Matt was giving a small private concert at the Odaiba Stadium and had invited Sora to come. She, without hesitation, agreed to come.
She was picked up that night in a fairly large limo that was arranged to take her to the stadium with Matt and the rest of his band.
Before the concert started, everyone was backstage rehearsing, talking with big time producers, or just simply kickin' back and relaxing. Sora went over to get some punch at the table across the room, when Matt noticed her heading there. He immediately broke off of his conversation with his publicist and walked towards her.
......God she's beautiful!...what am I sayin'? stop it Matt... no you have to let it out!.... when will you be able to finally show some affection to another human being? .... you know you can never hide from this. No matter how hard you try, it'll always follow you even in your death... you can run,... but you can never hide.... I'll have to tell her!..... she's the most wonderful- most beautiful- most perfect-
He came up to the punch bowl just as Sora was reaching for a cup. Instead, her hand fell onto his and she gave a slight blush. But she was even more bashful when Matt took her other hand and looked deep into her chestnut color eyes. It seemed that his eyes were so deep and cerulean as the ocean that she could stare into them for ages and be lost in them. There was a blissful tingling as his voice spoke her name that the sensation ran through her entire body.
"Sora, I have been wanting to tell you something......." he paused to clear his mind and make sure he got the words out right, "Sora I-"
He was immediately cut off by the announcement by the stage manager, "You guys are on in five!"
"-I hope you enjoy the show." he said instead, finding his sensation once again replaced with troubled thoughts to cover up his true feelings. The expression on Sora's face was of disappointment as Yamato left through the stage entrance.
..... Matt... He's just a friend. Remember that Sora. He's just a friend.... But I can't help but feel upset that Matt hadn't-....hadn't what?... no. He's just a friend.... a wonderful 'friend'.......
~*~*~*~
Tai and Mimi's days together were also spent on catching up and getting closer. But Tai was still angry, still heartbroken, still hurt. But now he also felt confused because all of those feelings were declining as others started growing in it's place. They were for the attractive, fun loving, other young woman in his life. She had some how got him to trail off from his self pity at certain times. And he started feeling more and more complete as their time was spent together hours after hours. When he realized this, he felt more angry at himself. He was angry at his heart being so disloyal. How could he forget his love for Sora so soon?! No, he wouldn't forget, he didn't want to let himself to let go.
.....NO!... I still love 'her'. but how could my heart betray me like this?.. so soon?.. too soon?... its not right! its not fair!....I'll never stop loving 'her'....isn't that what I told 'her'? ... that I'd never feel the same way towards another?!.... Now I'm going against my own promises?!........WHY?!......
Tai kept trying to fight off the feelings that were continuing to grow inside of him. The more he tried to deny it the more it pushed. But he couldn't let this stop him from breaking another promise, that he'd take Mimi to carnival today.
Mimi loved having Tai around. It made her feel safe and protected, the way she use to feel when Tai was their leader in the digital world. Back then she use to seem as an annoyance to him, but now, with her grown beauty and matured behavior, no one would hesitate on her accountability for the crest of sincerity.
Something was different though. She use to admire Tai with his courage and leader-like conduct, but now she felt something new towards the spiky haired young man. Mimi didn't try to deny these feelings though, like the others. She openly embraced this wonderful ambiance by spending her time with Tai as much as she could.
The two had just gotten off of their last ride, the Ferris wheel. This altered Tai's mood as it was a reminder of 'her', it being her favorite ride. He involuntarily wandered off from Mimi to sit down on the far bench overlooking the city. Mimi worriedly followed the dismayed boy and sat next to him.
"What's wrong Taichi?" she innocently asked.
He didn't answer, but seemed more upset after Mimi asked.
"Com'on... You know you can tell me anything... What's wrong?" she persistently asked.
"Don't call me that..." Tai answered in a low whisper.
"Huh? Call you what?" Mimi was confused as to what Tai meant.
"Don't call me TAICHI!... That was 'her' name for me!.... and you have no right!" Tai angrily yelled at his harmless friend.
"No right? No right to what?! To care?!" Mimi yelled right back. She was angry, but also hurting. She turned away so that Tai couldn't see the tears fill her eyes.
"Mimi.....I...I'm-" Tai tried to apologize, but Mimi already got up and ran away from him. He never meant to hurt her. She was the last person who he'd want to cause the pain that he was feeling. All Mimi tried to do was be a good friend, or more. Now because of his arrogance she ran off.