Title: Choices- Part 2/?
Author: Kimberly Warner
E-Mail: KimbearlySue@aol.com
Rating: PG
Category: MSR
Spoilers: Requiem, All Things, and anything in Season 8 is fair game.
Summary: Scully has her baby and Mulder is returned to her, but what will the consequences be?
Notes: I am yet another fic write who named Scully's baby Samantha. Perhaps I will change it in the future, but this is the baby's name, so don't complain! Please R&R- I really love feedback :)
Disclaimer: All characters et. al. belong to Chris Carter and 1013 Productions. I am merely borrowing them for the time being.
Choices- Continued...
He was there, but even seeing him with her own eyes, Scully could barely believe it. Six months was such a long time and it showed on Mulder's face. Scully could hardly recognize her partner. His hair seemed dirty, tangled and had grown almost to his shoulders. His once clean face was now covered in a thick beard and dark shadows had formed under his eyes. He even appeared thinner than she remembered.
It tore at her heart to see him this way. She stayed standing in the doorway to his room, almost afraid to move any closer. She waited, silently, watching the thin green line which followed his heartbeat, listening to the rhythmic beeping and cold whoosh-eeee sound emanating from the room. The man she once knew to be so strong and alive was now on life support, barely clinging to life.
The doctor, whose name she learned was Peter Rankin, had told her that Mulder's prognosis was not good. Whatever had happened to him over those past six months, whoever had him, had wreaked havoc with his body. Externally, there was evidence of massive damage being inflicted on his body over a period of time. Multiple scars were found, including one long jagged scar running the length of his chest, which appeared to be the worst of all. There was also evidence of bones being broken and re-healed and other damage, which Dr. Rankin just could not explain. This, however, was not what was killing him. In all honesty, the doctor had told Scully, he should be awake right now, but something was still hurting him, and his system was slowly shutting down. I'm sorry, he had said, it looks like there is nothing we can do. I'm sorry.
Rolling Dr. Rankin's words over and over in her mind, Scully slowly walked into the room, shutting the door behind her. She stepped slowly over to Mulder's still form, pulling her robe closer together. For a moment, a look of pain moved quickly over her features and then small tears welled up in her eyes. Quietly she thought back to the words she had written in her journal several weeks after Mulder's disappearance...
*I never thought that missing you would hurt so bad, but when you left a terrible emptiness welled up in my soul, as if I was left to wander, looking for you, in a cold unending desert. My sorrow weighs down on my shoulders and at times it is the only the hope that I will someday find you that keeps me going day by day. My hope and my anger. I am so furious...so angry at those who took you, angry at myself for not realizing sooner that it was you they wanted, and angry at you...for loving me so much that you did not see either that it was you who needed to be protected, not me. Mulder, I should have been able to protect you for once.
You have risked so much to save and protect me in the past- your life, your career, but this time you may have lost it all. And so have I, because I have realized that my love for you runs deeper than anything I have ever known; there is proof of that in the baby, this tiny miracle, which I now carry...*
Scully reached out and grasped Mulder's pale hand. It was cold, but she held it tightly, rubbing her thumb across his palm.
"It's really you..." She whispered, barely concealing her tears. She brought his hand to her lips and kissed it gently, but he was unresponsive. Losing strength momentarily, she fell into a chair behind her. As if in some silent prayer she tilted her head back looking toward the ceiling, her eyes squeezed shut and her chin trembling, clutching Mulder's hand tightly, tears and emotions both threatening to overcome her. Why, after all the endless days and sleepless nights of dreaming for this very same moment would she have to lose her partner, her friend, her everything again when she had just gotten him back? He was stolen away from her once and she could do nothing, and now she was about to lose him again...forever. It did not seem fair.*It's not fair, damnit!* She wanted to cry out to anyone who would hear her.
Scully's thoughts drifted to her daughter, still so new, with no knowledge at all of what sort of precious gift she was. She did not even know who her own father was. *And if Mulder dies, she will never get to know him...*the thought sent a pain straight through Scully's soul. She had to know, just as Mulder had to know about his daughter. Their daughter.
It was so amazing. Only a year ago, Scully would never have imagined having a child. Let alone a child with Mulder. She had never even realized how much she loved him until that night, when everything changed.
She had fallen asleep on Mulder's couch and when she awoke sometime later, it was almost three in the morning. At first she was confused, not remembering where she was and how she got there. And then bits and pieces of her and Mulder's previous night's conversation slowly came back to her.
*What if there was only one choice and all the other ones were wrong? And there were signs along the way to pay attention to...*
Maybe her life hadn't completely changed during those three days, but something inside her was different. She knew that she would never quite look at anything the same way again, but this did not bother her. Scully actually felt very peaceful, as if some part of her had finally found what it was searching for.
Some time later she found herself standing in the doorway of Mulder's bedroom. His bedside lamp was still on and it appeared that he had fallen asleep while reading.--a book lay open across his chest and his glasses had slid crookedly down one side of his face as he slept. She watched him appreciatively for a moment before moving over to stand beside his bed. She reached down and picked up the book, laying it on the nightstand. He's dead to the world, she thought, amused, and then went to move the glasses from his face. She paused to admire his features, amazed at how relaxed he looked while sleeping.
Suddenly, Mulder's eyes flew open as he awoke, tense for a moment until he realized who was there with him. "Geez, Scully, you scared the hell out of me. What are you doing?" He took a deep breath and laughed.
Feeling very awkward and strangely shaken at being caught, Scully lifted his glasses, a wry grin on her face. "I was just...I mean, you were sleeping, and--" *What in the world am I doing?! Why am I babbling like this?* She screamed silently. She shut up, then and breathed in deeply. A wonderful thought blossomed in her mind and she smiled.
"I'm making a choice, Mulder," She said quietly. Then she kissed him.
It had all been so simple at the time, but the results had been so wonderful and complicated. Scully never would have dared to imagine the consequences of her actions that night, but she did not regret them.
Oddly enough, this bold step in their relationship had not put a wall between them as Scully had once feared it would. If anything, they had become even closer. They barely talked of that night between them in the weeks and months after, but they did not need to. Somehow they had been content in knowing that they loved each other, that they were best friends, that they were partners in every sense of the word.
As these thoughts ran through her mind, Scully laid her head down near Mulder's chest and dozed while holding his hand.
To Be Continued...
Author: Kimberly Warner
E-Mail: KimbearlySue@aol.com
Rating: PG
Category: MSR
Spoilers: Requiem, All Things, and anything in Season 8 is fair game.
Summary: Scully has her baby and Mulder is returned to her, but what will the consequences be?
Notes: I am yet another fic write who named Scully's baby Samantha. Perhaps I will change it in the future, but this is the baby's name, so don't complain! Please R&R- I really love feedback :)
Disclaimer: All characters et. al. belong to Chris Carter and 1013 Productions. I am merely borrowing them for the time being.
Choices- Continued...
He was there, but even seeing him with her own eyes, Scully could barely believe it. Six months was such a long time and it showed on Mulder's face. Scully could hardly recognize her partner. His hair seemed dirty, tangled and had grown almost to his shoulders. His once clean face was now covered in a thick beard and dark shadows had formed under his eyes. He even appeared thinner than she remembered.
It tore at her heart to see him this way. She stayed standing in the doorway to his room, almost afraid to move any closer. She waited, silently, watching the thin green line which followed his heartbeat, listening to the rhythmic beeping and cold whoosh-eeee sound emanating from the room. The man she once knew to be so strong and alive was now on life support, barely clinging to life.
The doctor, whose name she learned was Peter Rankin, had told her that Mulder's prognosis was not good. Whatever had happened to him over those past six months, whoever had him, had wreaked havoc with his body. Externally, there was evidence of massive damage being inflicted on his body over a period of time. Multiple scars were found, including one long jagged scar running the length of his chest, which appeared to be the worst of all. There was also evidence of bones being broken and re-healed and other damage, which Dr. Rankin just could not explain. This, however, was not what was killing him. In all honesty, the doctor had told Scully, he should be awake right now, but something was still hurting him, and his system was slowly shutting down. I'm sorry, he had said, it looks like there is nothing we can do. I'm sorry.
Rolling Dr. Rankin's words over and over in her mind, Scully slowly walked into the room, shutting the door behind her. She stepped slowly over to Mulder's still form, pulling her robe closer together. For a moment, a look of pain moved quickly over her features and then small tears welled up in her eyes. Quietly she thought back to the words she had written in her journal several weeks after Mulder's disappearance...
*I never thought that missing you would hurt so bad, but when you left a terrible emptiness welled up in my soul, as if I was left to wander, looking for you, in a cold unending desert. My sorrow weighs down on my shoulders and at times it is the only the hope that I will someday find you that keeps me going day by day. My hope and my anger. I am so furious...so angry at those who took you, angry at myself for not realizing sooner that it was you they wanted, and angry at you...for loving me so much that you did not see either that it was you who needed to be protected, not me. Mulder, I should have been able to protect you for once.
You have risked so much to save and protect me in the past- your life, your career, but this time you may have lost it all. And so have I, because I have realized that my love for you runs deeper than anything I have ever known; there is proof of that in the baby, this tiny miracle, which I now carry...*
Scully reached out and grasped Mulder's pale hand. It was cold, but she held it tightly, rubbing her thumb across his palm.
"It's really you..." She whispered, barely concealing her tears. She brought his hand to her lips and kissed it gently, but he was unresponsive. Losing strength momentarily, she fell into a chair behind her. As if in some silent prayer she tilted her head back looking toward the ceiling, her eyes squeezed shut and her chin trembling, clutching Mulder's hand tightly, tears and emotions both threatening to overcome her. Why, after all the endless days and sleepless nights of dreaming for this very same moment would she have to lose her partner, her friend, her everything again when she had just gotten him back? He was stolen away from her once and she could do nothing, and now she was about to lose him again...forever. It did not seem fair.*It's not fair, damnit!* She wanted to cry out to anyone who would hear her.
Scully's thoughts drifted to her daughter, still so new, with no knowledge at all of what sort of precious gift she was. She did not even know who her own father was. *And if Mulder dies, she will never get to know him...*the thought sent a pain straight through Scully's soul. She had to know, just as Mulder had to know about his daughter. Their daughter.
It was so amazing. Only a year ago, Scully would never have imagined having a child. Let alone a child with Mulder. She had never even realized how much she loved him until that night, when everything changed.
She had fallen asleep on Mulder's couch and when she awoke sometime later, it was almost three in the morning. At first she was confused, not remembering where she was and how she got there. And then bits and pieces of her and Mulder's previous night's conversation slowly came back to her.
*What if there was only one choice and all the other ones were wrong? And there were signs along the way to pay attention to...*
Maybe her life hadn't completely changed during those three days, but something inside her was different. She knew that she would never quite look at anything the same way again, but this did not bother her. Scully actually felt very peaceful, as if some part of her had finally found what it was searching for.
Some time later she found herself standing in the doorway of Mulder's bedroom. His bedside lamp was still on and it appeared that he had fallen asleep while reading.--a book lay open across his chest and his glasses had slid crookedly down one side of his face as he slept. She watched him appreciatively for a moment before moving over to stand beside his bed. She reached down and picked up the book, laying it on the nightstand. He's dead to the world, she thought, amused, and then went to move the glasses from his face. She paused to admire his features, amazed at how relaxed he looked while sleeping.
Suddenly, Mulder's eyes flew open as he awoke, tense for a moment until he realized who was there with him. "Geez, Scully, you scared the hell out of me. What are you doing?" He took a deep breath and laughed.
Feeling very awkward and strangely shaken at being caught, Scully lifted his glasses, a wry grin on her face. "I was just...I mean, you were sleeping, and--" *What in the world am I doing?! Why am I babbling like this?* She screamed silently. She shut up, then and breathed in deeply. A wonderful thought blossomed in her mind and she smiled.
"I'm making a choice, Mulder," She said quietly. Then she kissed him.
It had all been so simple at the time, but the results had been so wonderful and complicated. Scully never would have dared to imagine the consequences of her actions that night, but she did not regret them.
Oddly enough, this bold step in their relationship had not put a wall between them as Scully had once feared it would. If anything, they had become even closer. They barely talked of that night between them in the weeks and months after, but they did not need to. Somehow they had been content in knowing that they loved each other, that they were best friends, that they were partners in every sense of the word.
As these thoughts ran through her mind, Scully laid her head down near Mulder's chest and dozed while holding his hand.
To Be Continued...