Chapter
Ten:
She was early. Very early. She
hadn't had the strength to go to cheerleading practice and she didn't want to
be there, in the classroom. She wanted to be in bed, where no one could reach
her or comfort her. She just wanted to be.
"Sakura?"
She blinked, not even hearing, eyes
trained on the desk and her hands crossed on top of it.
Behind her Syaoran came up. He
hesitated, staring at her profile cautiously and then reached out and clasped
her shoulder. "Sakura." He repeated.
She jumped, head snapping to look up
at him.
He took a step back, fingers letting
go of her shoulder. "Sakura, what's wrong? What happened?" he put his backpack
down on his desk, taking Tomoyo's seat next to her.
She merely watched him blankly, eyes
red, dark circles under. "I don't feel well." She whispered, gazing at him
hollowly.
Syaoran swallowed and then reached
out again, shifting a lock of hair away from her face. "You're not well,
Sakura." He said softly. "You shouldn't be in school."
"I have to be." She murmured,
hesitating. And then her expression simply crumbled and she lifted both hands
to her face, weeping silently.
It took him a second to register the
fact that she was crying. But when it finally did he lifted both hands, taking hold
of her wrists and pulling her hands away from her face. "What happened? Talk to
me, tell me what happened." He said and then he pleaded, "Come on…"
Sakura bowed her head, hiding behind
her hair. "I'm such a fool, Syaoran. I should have realized, I should have
known…" she cried, tears streaming down her face.
Syaoran gazed at her, releasing her
wrists to cup her face with both hands. "What should you have known? Tell me something,
Sakura-"
She shook her head, leaning forward
slowly.
He accepted her weight, wrapping his
arms around her shoulders and resting his chin on her head. And he held her, he
didn't know how long, until her sniffles turned into soft breathing. She
smelled of cherry blossoms, of petals and sunshine, the scent drifting from her
hair. It was her scent, one he had come to recognize over the years. Always
hers.
And he felt warm. Warmer than
Yukito. His warmth traveled into her as well, causing her skin to tingle. And
now, somehow, this felt right. Everything about it felt right. The weight of
his arms. His individual scent. A mixture of soap and…and…
Syaoran. Soap and Syaoran.
Even how she fit into him, how it
felt to wrap her arms around his waist and let him hold her. It felt good. His
fingers were tangling in her hair, playing with locks and she knew he did it
absentmindedly. She was probably scaring him.
With a soft breath she pulled back a
bit and looked up into his eyes. And finally, she saw the eyes. The right pair
of brown eyes. The ones she had wanted to see the night before. Right there.
Light chocolate brown eyes, thick enough to immerse herself in.
"You're ok." He said quietly, gazing
at her. He lifted a hand, brushing aside a straying lock of hair and then
staring at her, at every part of her. She shivered internally as his eyes
rested on her cheek where the lock had been. Then his gaze moved to her
eyebrows, palm running across her skin there. And her eyes, brown looking into
green. Her nose, small.
Her lips.
"I told Yukito-san…" she whispered,
almost afraid to break the spell.
He looked into her eyes. "Told him?"
he asked faintly, almost absentmindedly. His gaze seemed far away, mind just as
distant no doubt.
"I told Yukito-san that I loved
him."
Syaoran snapped back into reality
right then and there.
Sakura studied him, eyes traveling
from one brown eye to the other. And each time she did the other eye seemed
somehow more fascinating. Was this what it felt like? To find something so
beautiful that one wanted to gaze at it forever?
"And what happened?" he asked slowly.
Sakura swallowed, eyes dropping to
his mouth. "He didn't love me back." She murmured. And she bowed her head,
leaning her forehead into that mouth. "He didn't love me back…"
Syaoran stared straight over her head
at the morning sun. Straight ahead into the distance. Because if he looked
anywhere else he knew the tears shimmering in his eyes would fall, roll down
his cheeks and into her hair.
I would love you…with all my
heart I would love you…
"Ohaiyo!" Tomoyo's voice cried,
echoing in the classroom.
Sakura pulled away as if struck,
looking toward the door. "T…Tomoyo-chan." She uttered hoarsely, gazing at her
friend.
Syaoran bowed his head, releasing
her, wishing she would just come back into his arms. For one moment longer,
another second. An entire lifetime.
Tomoyo came up and then stared at
her friend. "What is it?" she asked and she looked at Syaoran as he stood,
hands lifting to run through his hair. He turned away, winding around the desk
and floating toward the door, walking out.
Sakura stared after him. She wanted
to reach out to him, allow her emotions to drag him back toward her.
Instead she looked at Tomoyo.
"Yukito-san doesn't love me, Tomoyo-chan." She said. And she sighed as her
friend knelt beside her, wrapping her arms around her.
"You'll be ok, Sakura-chan." She
whispered to her friend, holding her close as Sakura buried her face into her
hair. "Just talk to me, tell me everything and it'll be all right. It'll be all
right."
Sakura nodded and began to tell her
everything, clutching at her the entire time.
Syaoran entered the boys' bathroom,
hands rubbing his face.
It wasn't fair. It wasn't ever fair.
His face was drawn in the mirror. He
had looked so normal when he had woken up and now he was a wreck. He ran his
hands through his hair, pausing halfway through and merely standing there,
clutching at his hair.
"He didn't love me back…"
Pure anger swept through his body,
making him stiffen. He wanted to take out his sword and just practice, work out
his rage. Rage at the fact that it couldn't be him she had admitted her
feelings to. It couldn't be him she wanted. Loved.
No more. No more of this bet. It was
ending here and now. Because Sakura wouldn't want either him or Eriol at this point.
The one person she did want didn't want her back and going after her would only
cause her more grief.
It was time to end it.
When he got back to the class Sakura
was waiting outside the classroom, Tomoyo leaning in close to her.
"Li-kun." Tomoyo said as he came
near slowly.
Sakura looked up, already pleading
with him with her eyes.
"Nani?" he asked, gazing at her
questioningly.
Sakura smiled at him slowly and she
held up his backpack to him. "Walk me home, Syaoran?" she asked of him.
Her expression looked like it was
ready to crumble again. With a nod he accepted his backpack, slinging it over
one shoulder. "Of course." He said.
Tomoyo smiled, feigning cheer for
her friend. "Sleep some more. Things always look better once you sleep on it."
She said and she lifted a hand to brush Sakura's hair lovingly.
Sakura gazed at her. That's what it
felt like, to have a mother. To have someone who would run their fingers
through your hair and comfort you with soft words when things just didn't go
right. She realized then and there just how much she loved Tomoyo-chan.
"Thank you." She whispered and she
sighed as Tomoyo embraced her, squeezing tightly. "Thank you so much."
Tomoyo exhaled with her. "Go home,"
she ordered playfully. And she stepped aside, allowing Syaoran to lead her
towards the exit.
Syaoran paused as they reached her
gate. "You'll be ok, alone?" he asked her as she merely looked up at her house.
She nodded, facing him after a thoughtful
moment. "I think I will be, yeah." She said and she smiled at him.
Syaoran inhaled deeply, shoving his
hands in his pockets. "And you'll call me if you need anything? I'll be home
now. There's really no point in my going back to class."
Not if you're not going to be
there…
"I will, Syaoran." She said softly
and she reached out, her palm cupping his cheek tenderly. "Thank you."
He swallowed, feeling the slightest
bit faint. "It's no problem." He said and he gazed at her as she gazed right
back.
His skin was smooth, baby smooth.
Soft over a hard jaw and cheekbones. Sakura let her hand drop away and she
bowed her head, entering her gate.
Syaoran waited until she was safely
inside before turning and walking away. He didn't know what was going on but if
things were heading his way he wasn't sure whether or not to be grateful.
Whatever the case, it was all over now. He was just going to have a talk with
Eriol and Tomoyo and put everything to rest.
For Sakura's sake.
Sakura plopped down on her bed, her
body so heavy. Tired. She hadn't slept at all the night before and Tomoyo was
right. If she slept everything would be all right. Everything would come into
perspective. She would go back to being herself, maybe even still be very close
to Yukito-san. She had to talk to him, to let him know that things could be all
right between them. That she wanted things to be all right between them.
Kero was probably asleep in her
drawer. She didn't mind. She wouldn't disturb him and he wouldn't disturb her.
If he woke later she would just say she hadn't been feeling well. Because once
she got some sleep she would be back to herself. Stronger.
Something poked the back of her neck
as she rolled onto her back and she reached under her pillow, pulling forth the
videotape. Oh, that was right. Tomoyo's video. Perhaps an old one of the days
she had been catching Clow Cards. She missed those days sometimes, missed
fighting for something. These days, things were almost dead.
No other cards had come forth since
the Dream Card. Whoever had been messing with them seemed to have stopped. For
the moment, anyway. Which was fine with her.
With a sigh she rose and crouched
before her television, slipping the tape into the VCR. Not much to rewind.
Tomoyo had probably been watching a bit of it. It finished rewinding and she
sat back on her rear, pressing Play. Just a little bit. She would watch a
little and then go straight to sleep. Maybe if she was up around dinnertime
she'd do kitchen duty again. Oni-chan always came home tired.
"Li-kun, no one else is aware, I
assure you…"
Sakura looked at the tape, frowning.
Tomoyo's voice but the picture taped wasn't focused on anything, bits and
pieces of a classroom flying around as the camera swung wildly.
"You can come down from the desk
now."
Sakura stared as the picture
suddenly focused on Syaoran who looked like he was ready to run for his life.
He was crouched on a desk, resembling a trapped animal. It brought a confused
smile to Sakura's lips. What was going on?
"Stay away, Daidouji-san. I'm
warning you…" he was saying and he was holding out his hands to her as if
trying to ward away her evil with his handmade cross.
"Syaoran, you're so strange…" Sakura
said affectionately, leaning forward eagerly. When had this happened? Where had
she been?
She watched as Tomoyo spoke from
behind the camera. Then there was a pause in the camera tape, a slight blur.
And suddenly Eriol-kun was in the room. That was his shirt off to the side of
the camera, she was sure of it. Sakura cocked her head, trying to understand
what was being said.
"Li-kun, we've decided it's time
you told Sakura how you feel. Towards her."
Sakura stiffened, staring at
Syaoran's expression.
H…hooeeeeee?
"It's long overdue and Eriol-kun
and I are just sick of it. It's quite obvious how you feel. Demo,
Sakura-chan…can be dense, at times…"
"Hey." Sakura growled at the
television.
There was more chit chat as Eriol
said something about Syaoran getting something off his chest. The tape was a
bit messy, hard to understand. But she was sure she was understanding most of
it.
"All right, all right! Yes, I
like her! Yes, I accept her as Card Mistress!"
That was Syaoran again. Sakura
grimaced, leaning even further. She couldn't catch things too clearly. Any closer
and she'd have to start going blind.
"Yes, I'm in love with her!"
Sakura's jaw dropped open, staring
at the tape in disbelief. That had come out nice and clear. But she couldn't
have possibly heard what she thought she had just heard. It wasn't possible
because…because…
Because it was Syaoran.
"No plan! Whatever happens
between Sakura and myself will happen if it's meant to."
Sakura felt her heart skip a beat.
This was real. This had happened. Syaoran had said that, about the two of them.
And her lips turned upward slowly, cheeks blushing faintly.
Herself and Syaoran. She found
herself liking the idea.
"Perhaps if I whip up a few
monsters, throw them at her. I'll give you the place and time, borrow her cards
with the excuse that I need a few errands done-"
That was Eriol-kun. She narrowed her
eyes, suddenly feeling as if a small piece of a puzzle had slipped into place.
Whip up a few monsters?
"I'll win her my own way, by
myself."
Sakura felt the blush spread,
creeping down her face into her neck. She couldn't believe this was how Syaoran felt. For how long had this
been going on? Why hadn't anyone told her?
"A game then." That was
Eriol-kun again. "A bet. A bet that I can win her before you do."
She stared at the tape, the blush
she had felt only moments ago slowly draining away into paleness. A bet? What
bet? What was going on? She couldn't understand for the life of her. She heard
Syaoran ask something indignantly but the tape was such a mess, she couldn't
understand-
"You heard me." Eriol was
saying darkly. "What is there to lose, really? Except…her?"
"I'm not playing your game."
"Then you automatically forfeit
her. To me." Eriol's voice came again and yet it didn't sound like Eriol.
Was Eriol so callous? "This isn't a battle, my descendant. This is a game.
With everything at stake."
"I'm not going to forfeit her."
Syaoran said quietly. "I agree to your game."
Her dresser drawer slowly slid open
but she ignored it, heart ripped into two. This wasn't happening. It couldn't
be, not again.
And yet…again. Someone else was doing this again.
Hurting her.
"Sakura-chan?" Kero asked, floating
up out of the drawer, sounding sleepy.
She didn't turn to face him, but at
the same time she wasn't really paying attention to the tape anymore. She just
sat there, numb to everything.
I can't believe this…
"Sakura-chan?" Kero suddenly sounded
wary. "What are you watching?"
She bowed her head, staring at the
floor until it swam before her eyes. "I'm a bet, Kero-chan?" she asked
hoarsely, her voice a mere whisper.
She heard herself come in on the
tape, saying something about how she couldn't hear what they had been talking
about. And she remembered the day it had happened. It had only been a week or
two ago. And Syaoran had looked guilty, why hadn't she picked up on that? Why
hadn't she understood?
"Sakura, stop the tape." Kero said
and he sounded urgent. "Stop the tape. Stop it now!"
"It's too late, Kero-chan." She
said, shaking her head. And then it dawned on her and she whirled to face him,
eyes reddening. "You knew about this?" she demanded.
Kero-chan backed up a bit.
"T…Tomoyo-chan told me about it. Yesterday. And-"
Sakura turned away and he broke off,
watching her as she stopped the tape and yanked it out.
"Sakura-chan-"
She rose to her knees, slipping the
video back into its case and then finally standing, shutting off the
television. Her movements were jerky as she unzipped her bag and shoved the
tape in.
"What are you doing? Where are you
going?" Kero asked frantically and almost as a last resort, "Why aren't you in school?"
Sakura slung her backpack over her
shoulder and stormed out, hair flying around her face.
"Sakura-chan!" he was left shouting
after her.