Title: So Much For the Afterglow
Author: Courtney
Email: courtneystovall@yahoo.com
Rating: R
Disclaimer: Mine . . . all mine!!! evil grin Oh, but I stole the title from a kickass song by Everclear.
Category: Jake/Hamilton
Summary: It's just before fall semester begins and Jake discovers she has bigger problems than hiding her gender.
Distribution: Required Reading, of course; and anywhere else, as long as you email me to let me know and keep these headers with the story.
Author's Notes: This was originally the start of an X-Files fic but I changed it around a bit to conform it to Jake and Hamilton because, frankly, I suck at writing Mulder and Scully. Oh well . . . sigh.
Thanks: To Jean, for beta reading this. Thank you, thank you, thank you! And to everyone else who keeps writing YA fic; you're going to end up saving my sanity if we never see the show again so thanks!
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Part 9
October 15, 2000
Dear Jake,
It's been two weeks since the last time I saw you, two days since my last letter, and two hours since the last time we spoke. I miss you. I never thought it was possible to miss someone so much . . . but I feel like I even have trouble breathing when you aren't around. It's like, since we met, you've become so important to my life. You make me a whole person. And, when we're apart, I feel incomplete. All I can seem to think of is you and how long it will be until I can see you again.
You told me today that your mom might let me stay there for a few days over Thanksgiving holidays. I know it's only a month or so away, but it seems like forever. I'm not sure if I can hold out that long. Maybe I can sneak up to the city for the day next weekend. I'll talk to Bella about it this week and see what I can find out.
Anyway, how are you? I know we just got off the phone and I just asked you all this but I want to make sure that you're okay. I'm really worried about you, baby. I just keep thinking that I should be there for you during all this. Isn't that my responsibility? I can't understand why your mother and my parents don't feel that way, too.
Well, I better go ahead and wrap this up. It's about time for dinner. My parents have been so weird lately and they think that they need to spend more 'quality time' with me, whatever that means. Like the fact that we don't always get to sit down at the dinner table together led to me having sex. Whatever. I think it's all my mother's idea. And once you get something in her head it's hard to talk to her. You know how she is.
I love you, Jake. Forever and always,
Hamilton
-----------------------
October 18, 2000
Dear Hamilton,
I just got your letter and I've been thinking about you all day so I wanted to go ahead and write back. I haven't talked to you since the day you wrote the letter so I wanted you to know that I am still doing fine. I went to the doctor today and he said that I was perfectly healthy. I suppose that's good. I mean, I know it is, it's just . . . I dunno, I guess I'm still pretty freaked out by the whole situation.
I miss you. Getting your letter today was the highlight of my week. Did I tell you that I met my tutor on Monday? No, I don't guess I did since we haven't talked since then. Well, her name is Julia and she's twenty-eight. She's really nice; not at all what I was expecting. I thought I'd get some evil old crone who had finally retired from teaching the masses only to save all of her repressed hatred of the youth of America for me alone. Maybe I watch too much TV. Anyway, Julia's great. We just talked mostly on Monday. I told her all about my situation and about you. So far I think you would like her a lot.
About Thanksgiving, my mom said she'd talk to your mom next week when she gets back from London. Did I mention that she was in London? Well, she is. I'm here with just Consuela, as usual. I knew that overprotective act she pulled my first two weeks home wouldn't last. On some levels I'm relieved to have her off my back, but then again I was kinda starting to like her attention for once. Oh well, it's not like I didn't expect this all along.
So, how goes things with your mom? She still acting weird? It's just guilt, you know. She thinks that she's failed as a parent because of what's happening. I think my mother feels the same way, at least a little. That's why she stayed in town for two whole weeks after I got home. I mean, I think that's the first time she's ever been in one city for that long when she didn't have some sort of job tying her there. Anyway, your mom will slack off soon enough. She's just concerned about you. I know that she loves you, though, so I'm sure that it will all turn out okay.
How is everyone back in New Rawley? I miss them all something terrible. Tell Bella hello for me. I've tried to call her a few times since I got back but she's never home. I'll probably try her again this weekend. Oh, and if she's able to drive you into the city sometime soon then be sure to let me know. That would be really great! I can't wait to see you both!!
Well, it's been a long day and I'm pretty tired so I better go. I'll probably talk to you again before you get this letter so sorry if everything I wrote was just a repeat. It's just so comforting to tell you things, even if it is just on paper.
I miss you. I love you. Write me back soon!
Love Always,
Jake
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October 21, 2000
Dear Jake,
I got your letter today. I haven't heard from you in almost a week. I wish we could talk every day but my parents will only let me call once a week. They think it's better that way; something about us living our own lives and how we'll be too wrapped up in each other if all we ever do is talk on the phone. How do they expect me not to be wrapped up in your life? You're carrying my child, for Christ sake. Sometimes I wonder if parents were ever really young themselves. They don't seem to think like anyone who ever could have been in this situation.
Anyway, how is everything with you? I'm glad to hear that all went a-okay with the doctor the other day. I was hoping that you would call me when you got home but I understand that you're busy. Your mom and Consuela are probably giving you the same crap that my parents are giving me. It'll work out, though.
I talked to Bella about this weekend and she said that she can't get away this week but that she'd be happy to drive me down next week on Saturday for the day. Can you get away for the afternoon? I would just say that we could come over to your place but I'm not sure how much your mom would like that. Just let me know, okay? Call me when you get this letter. I love you!
Love,
Hamilton
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October 25, 2000
Dear Hamilton,
I know it's been a few days since I got your letter but I was waiting as long as possible before I replied to see if things were going to change. Unfortunately it looks like they aren't. My mom has decided to make me go to London with her! I wanted to call and tell you but she, like your parents, thinks it's a bad idea for us to spend so much time talking and took my phone. I'm still fuming with her about that. Anyway, she thinks it would be best for me to "put some distance" between you and I so she's dragging me off to a foreign country while she finishes a play there. I really don't want to go, but I'm not sure that I have much of a choice.
The only bit of good news is that my mom wants Julia to come with us and keep tutoring me and she has agreed to help me stay in touch with you even if my mom tries to stop it. Of course that will probably only mean that she will mail the occasional letter to you from me but at least it's something.
God, Hamilton I'm going to miss you so much! I was really looking forward to seeing you on Thanksgiving. Now I'm not sure when we will see each other again. You know that I love you. I'll call as soon as I can.
Love,
Jake
-----------------------
Hamilton set the letter aside, not bothering to wipe the tears from his cheeks. Jake was leaving. He didn't know exactly when or for how long, but none of that really mattered much at that point. All that mattered was that she was leaving, and that Hamilton had no idea when he'd get to see her again.
He reached over and picked up the framed picture of her that he kept on his desk. It was one he had taken just after they'd met. She looked happy in the picture, innocent . . . not at all like she had the last time he had seen her. He wanted to remember this Jake, the one smiling for his camera in a happier time of her life. He hoped that she would be that happy again one day.
Putting the picture aside, Hamilton folded up Jake's latest letter and tucked it into the shoebox where he kept the others. As he closed the lid on the box and put it back in its place under his bed, he had no idea just how long it would be before he'd receive another letter from the woman he loved.
* * * * *
Author: Courtney
Email: courtneystovall@yahoo.com
Rating: R
Disclaimer: Mine . . . all mine!!! evil grin Oh, but I stole the title from a kickass song by Everclear.
Category: Jake/Hamilton
Summary: It's just before fall semester begins and Jake discovers she has bigger problems than hiding her gender.
Distribution: Required Reading, of course; and anywhere else, as long as you email me to let me know and keep these headers with the story.
Author's Notes: This was originally the start of an X-Files fic but I changed it around a bit to conform it to Jake and Hamilton because, frankly, I suck at writing Mulder and Scully. Oh well . . . sigh.
Thanks: To Jean, for beta reading this. Thank you, thank you, thank you! And to everyone else who keeps writing YA fic; you're going to end up saving my sanity if we never see the show again so thanks!
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Part 9
October 15, 2000
Dear Jake,
It's been two weeks since the last time I saw you, two days since my last letter, and two hours since the last time we spoke. I miss you. I never thought it was possible to miss someone so much . . . but I feel like I even have trouble breathing when you aren't around. It's like, since we met, you've become so important to my life. You make me a whole person. And, when we're apart, I feel incomplete. All I can seem to think of is you and how long it will be until I can see you again.
You told me today that your mom might let me stay there for a few days over Thanksgiving holidays. I know it's only a month or so away, but it seems like forever. I'm not sure if I can hold out that long. Maybe I can sneak up to the city for the day next weekend. I'll talk to Bella about it this week and see what I can find out.
Anyway, how are you? I know we just got off the phone and I just asked you all this but I want to make sure that you're okay. I'm really worried about you, baby. I just keep thinking that I should be there for you during all this. Isn't that my responsibility? I can't understand why your mother and my parents don't feel that way, too.
Well, I better go ahead and wrap this up. It's about time for dinner. My parents have been so weird lately and they think that they need to spend more 'quality time' with me, whatever that means. Like the fact that we don't always get to sit down at the dinner table together led to me having sex. Whatever. I think it's all my mother's idea. And once you get something in her head it's hard to talk to her. You know how she is.
I love you, Jake. Forever and always,
Hamilton
-----------------------
October 18, 2000
Dear Hamilton,
I just got your letter and I've been thinking about you all day so I wanted to go ahead and write back. I haven't talked to you since the day you wrote the letter so I wanted you to know that I am still doing fine. I went to the doctor today and he said that I was perfectly healthy. I suppose that's good. I mean, I know it is, it's just . . . I dunno, I guess I'm still pretty freaked out by the whole situation.
I miss you. Getting your letter today was the highlight of my week. Did I tell you that I met my tutor on Monday? No, I don't guess I did since we haven't talked since then. Well, her name is Julia and she's twenty-eight. She's really nice; not at all what I was expecting. I thought I'd get some evil old crone who had finally retired from teaching the masses only to save all of her repressed hatred of the youth of America for me alone. Maybe I watch too much TV. Anyway, Julia's great. We just talked mostly on Monday. I told her all about my situation and about you. So far I think you would like her a lot.
About Thanksgiving, my mom said she'd talk to your mom next week when she gets back from London. Did I mention that she was in London? Well, she is. I'm here with just Consuela, as usual. I knew that overprotective act she pulled my first two weeks home wouldn't last. On some levels I'm relieved to have her off my back, but then again I was kinda starting to like her attention for once. Oh well, it's not like I didn't expect this all along.
So, how goes things with your mom? She still acting weird? It's just guilt, you know. She thinks that she's failed as a parent because of what's happening. I think my mother feels the same way, at least a little. That's why she stayed in town for two whole weeks after I got home. I mean, I think that's the first time she's ever been in one city for that long when she didn't have some sort of job tying her there. Anyway, your mom will slack off soon enough. She's just concerned about you. I know that she loves you, though, so I'm sure that it will all turn out okay.
How is everyone back in New Rawley? I miss them all something terrible. Tell Bella hello for me. I've tried to call her a few times since I got back but she's never home. I'll probably try her again this weekend. Oh, and if she's able to drive you into the city sometime soon then be sure to let me know. That would be really great! I can't wait to see you both!!
Well, it's been a long day and I'm pretty tired so I better go. I'll probably talk to you again before you get this letter so sorry if everything I wrote was just a repeat. It's just so comforting to tell you things, even if it is just on paper.
I miss you. I love you. Write me back soon!
Love Always,
Jake
-----------------------
October 21, 2000
Dear Jake,
I got your letter today. I haven't heard from you in almost a week. I wish we could talk every day but my parents will only let me call once a week. They think it's better that way; something about us living our own lives and how we'll be too wrapped up in each other if all we ever do is talk on the phone. How do they expect me not to be wrapped up in your life? You're carrying my child, for Christ sake. Sometimes I wonder if parents were ever really young themselves. They don't seem to think like anyone who ever could have been in this situation.
Anyway, how is everything with you? I'm glad to hear that all went a-okay with the doctor the other day. I was hoping that you would call me when you got home but I understand that you're busy. Your mom and Consuela are probably giving you the same crap that my parents are giving me. It'll work out, though.
I talked to Bella about this weekend and she said that she can't get away this week but that she'd be happy to drive me down next week on Saturday for the day. Can you get away for the afternoon? I would just say that we could come over to your place but I'm not sure how much your mom would like that. Just let me know, okay? Call me when you get this letter. I love you!
Love,
Hamilton
-----------------------
October 25, 2000
Dear Hamilton,
I know it's been a few days since I got your letter but I was waiting as long as possible before I replied to see if things were going to change. Unfortunately it looks like they aren't. My mom has decided to make me go to London with her! I wanted to call and tell you but she, like your parents, thinks it's a bad idea for us to spend so much time talking and took my phone. I'm still fuming with her about that. Anyway, she thinks it would be best for me to "put some distance" between you and I so she's dragging me off to a foreign country while she finishes a play there. I really don't want to go, but I'm not sure that I have much of a choice.
The only bit of good news is that my mom wants Julia to come with us and keep tutoring me and she has agreed to help me stay in touch with you even if my mom tries to stop it. Of course that will probably only mean that she will mail the occasional letter to you from me but at least it's something.
God, Hamilton I'm going to miss you so much! I was really looking forward to seeing you on Thanksgiving. Now I'm not sure when we will see each other again. You know that I love you. I'll call as soon as I can.
Love,
Jake
-----------------------
Hamilton set the letter aside, not bothering to wipe the tears from his cheeks. Jake was leaving. He didn't know exactly when or for how long, but none of that really mattered much at that point. All that mattered was that she was leaving, and that Hamilton had no idea when he'd get to see her again.
He reached over and picked up the framed picture of her that he kept on his desk. It was one he had taken just after they'd met. She looked happy in the picture, innocent . . . not at all like she had the last time he had seen her. He wanted to remember this Jake, the one smiling for his camera in a happier time of her life. He hoped that she would be that happy again one day.
Putting the picture aside, Hamilton folded up Jake's latest letter and tucked it into the shoebox where he kept the others. As he closed the lid on the box and put it back in its place under his bed, he had no idea just how long it would be before he'd receive another letter from the woman he loved.
* * * * *