Part II
BLEYS
"Yes, I think that you can. My name is Bleys, and I need to find the Hellmouth."
The blonde girl seemed taken aback by my reply, and took a moment to think, which gave me a chance to take a good look at her. She was rather petite, being not much larger than Fiona, but I could tell by looking at her that she had done some hard fighting in her young life. Clearly, there was something unusual about this girl. . .and she seemed vaguely familiar for no good reason that I was aware of. She looked casually at me, as if I had simply asked for the time of day and deadpanned, "Hellmouth? Never heard of it."
I sighed: this was going to take some work. "Look, I know that knowledge of the Hellmouth isn't an everyday thing in these parts, but I do know about it. . .and I was also told that the main line of defense against the nasty things that it draws was a bunch of teenagers. Am I correct in assuming that my source was referring to you?"
The girl's eyes narrowed, and I could see evidence of a formidable intelligence regarding me from behind those pretty green orbs. After another moment, she replied bluntly, "Assuming that they were, and that we did know about this Hellmouth that you're talking about, why would we tell some guy on a horse that we've just met? Loose lips sink ships, and all that jazz."
Benedict would certainly approve of her views on security, but still, I would need to convince her to cooperate. "Well, I suppose that you could call the rest of your friends together, since my source suggested that there were more of you, and you could ask me any questions that would make you feel comfortable before letting me know what I wanted to know. That would tend to serve my purposes too, since I had counted on asking for your help in dealing with a messy problem relating to the Hellmouth. Other than that, I don't know what I could do to convince you I'm not an enemy."
"I know!" The blonde whirled in annoyance as the tall, dark-haired boy chimed in. Undaunted, he continued, "How about if he helped us kill those vampires and the two Chaos Demons coming over to attack us?"
The girl and I locked startled glances, then we both turned in the direction he was pointing. Five vampires were approaching, together with. . .they were Chaos Demons! I vaulted out of my saddle and drew my blade, and I could hear the others preparing for combat as Zephyr prudently moved out of the way. I called over my shoulder, "I'll take the Chaos Demons. . .this weapon is very effective against them." Curious, I turned for a moment, and asked, "How did you know that those were Chaos Demons? They're not exactly native to these parts."
The boy smiled grimly and replied, "I heard them described by. . .someone. Slime and antlers-dead giveaway." I laughed at that and charged the two Chaos Demons, my blade Evening Star tracing arcs in the air that made the foul creatures retreat a short distance in dismay. One of the vampires made the mistake of trying to attack me at this point: Evening Star quickly ended the issue with a decapitating blow that left only a pile of burning dust. The demons moved in for the attack, and I assumed a defensive posture, trying to feel out their combat ability. It became rapidly apparent that they were quite good, and the wounds that I gave them only caused light flames before being snuffed: I was going to have to wear them down.
I heard two dying vampire screams behind me; obviously, these kids were pretty good at handling themselves. Good thing, too, as I found myself being sorely pressed by the Chaos Demons-they were just too damned resistant to my Pattern blade, and their own runeblades were giving me some nasty nicks. I was wondering how in hell I was going to salvage this fight when a crossbow bolt hissed over my left shoulder and buried itself in the left eye of one of the demons. It howled and dropped its blade, and I took the opportunity to finish it off with an overhead strike that split its skull and sent its burning body into a heap. I glanced over my shoulder and saw the blond girl was holding a crossbow and was rapidly reloading it. I also noted that her friends were still holding off two vampires. "I've got this one," I called out, not wanting the obviously weaker combatants to risk harm, "go help your friends!" She nodded in acknowledgment, put down the crossbow, and drew out a stake as she moved over to the grimly fighting boys. One on one, the Chaos Demon proved to be less of a challenge, and another minute's of fencing between us resulted in a decapitating blow that sent its flaming head flying off twenty feet, while its smoldering body fell next to its comrades. Breathing a sigh of relief, I turned back to the others.
They were watching me quietly, apparently not quite sure what to say. I decided to break the ice: "Thank you for the assistance, Miss--?"
She was still apparently a bit stunned by the whole thing-it took a moment for her to respond, "I'm Buffy Summers." She pointed at the boy who knew about Chaos Demons and continued, "He's Xander, and the talkative one over there is Oz."
I nodded at Xander and Oz , then asked again, "So, can you take me to the Hellmouth now?"
Buffy sighed, then waved for me to follow. "We need to get the others. Follow us. . .oh, and I think it would be a good idea to find a place to keep your horse. They kind of attract attention here."
I laughed and replied, "Zephyr will be fine here. . .he's not a typical horse." I gave Zephyr a nod and walked up to Buffy. "Let's go."
As we left the scene of the fight, I thought I saw a figure watching us from some distance away. By the time I turned to give the apparition my full attention, it had vanished. I shrugged and continued to follow Buffy.
BUFFY
Giles was working in the library when we walked in. It would have been nice if he had been as visibly surprised as we were after encountering Bleys, but he's far too used to strange visitors at this point to be shocked by someone as "normal" looking as Bleys. Willow is a little less jaded, though, and she visibly perked up as we came in and she noticed the strangely dressed man.
Giles looked over Bleys carefully, then asked, "I take it that you're not a refugee from the local Society for Creative Anachronism?"
Bleys looked annoyed, and I decided to let him off the hook. "His name is Bleys, and we found him in the park just before we ran into a bunch of vampires and Chaos Demons in one of the cemeteries. He killed the Chaos Demons, so we figured that he couldn't be all-bad. He says he's looking for the Hellmouth."
Giles now did look rather perplexed, and his reply was rather hesitant: "Ah yes, I see. Chaos Demons? With slime and antlers?" "Yeah, G-man," piped in Xander, to Giles' obvious annoyance, "deluxe package, right out of the factory."
Bleys cleared his throat, and I decided to let him handle further explanations: "Mr. Giles, I am Bleys, Prince of Amber, and I am here to prevent a major catastrophe regarding this Hellmouth of yours." He looked around the room, evidently concentrating, then pointed to the spot that had twice caused us such a headache. "Unless I'm greatly mistaken, the focal point is right there."
Well, I was impressed, and I could see that the others were too. Giles recovered first, and managed "Ah, yes. . .that would be correct. . .Prince Bleys, is it? The Hellmouth, when opened, manifests its nexus directly on the spot you have just indicated. What is the nature of your interest in it? Also, I must apologize: I'm not familiar with Amber."
Bleys grinned, and I could tell he had used that grin for getting some serious snugglebunnies in the past. "Bleys will be sufficient: I'm not hung up on titles. I wouldn't expect you to be familiar with Amber. . .it's a fair distance from here." He spent the next ten minutes explaining who and what he was, and what Amber was. Suffice it to say, he wigged us out quite a bit. It's a rather unpleasant idea to think that all you do in trying to save the world is just a sideshow, with the real important stuff going on elsewhere. Did this all mean that we weren't real? I looked at the expressions on my friend's faces, and could see that similar thoughts were occurring to them. Of course, this guy could just be a nut who happened to be a badass, but my instincts told me otherwise. Giles looked fascinated (of course) then abruptly darted into his office, bringing out a book with the picture of a unicorn on the cover. I snorted and commented, "Where's the little weasel? He's all right with this research crap . . .why not let him be useful for a change?"
Giles looked at me as if to give me a lecture about respecting one's Watcher, then thought better of it. "I sent Wesley home. I decided that the annoyance accompanying his presence exceeded the value of his cataloging efforts, which is saying something." He opened the book and turned a few pages before saying, "Yes. . .the cult of the Unicorn. They believed that the course of the Universe was set by a small number of archetypal beings whose dominant traits were reflected in our everyday world." He closed the book and commented, "Remarkable. . .and your abilities let you travel from universe to universe with relative ease?"
Bleys nodded, and elaborated, "All shadows-what we call the alternate universes-take their form from Amber, with distortions created by distance and proximity to the Courts of Chaos, to which your shadow is relatively 'close.' Also, individuals of importance in a particular shadow are often shadows of the members of the royal family of Amber, since the nature of our existence causes such shadows to be cast even at great distances from Amber." He smiled again, but did not elaborate further.
I had had enough of cryptic for one night, and I interrupted, "All right, so you're Archetype Boy. Good for you. Now what is the problem with the Hellmouth that required someone who is obviously important as you to come out this far?"
Bleys looked a little annoyed, but he quickly recovered and began to explain. "A link has been created between your Hellmouth and the Logrus of Chaos, which is the central source of true power in the Courts of Chaos. This link will draw more and more powerful creatures to your location for a few days longer. . .then the amount of energy pouring through the link will destabilize the Hellmouth, causing it to explode, destroying this shadow utterly and devastating the ones nearby."
I could see the blood draining out of more than a few faces, and I'm sure I didn't look much better. I was getting so damned sick of having to save the world every other week. . .and with Faith on suspension, we were shorthanded. I was thinking of a clever reply to this serious piece of bad news when Angel walked in: "What's going on?"
Somehow, even Angel's arrival wasn't making me feel any better. . .we were in deep trouble.
BLEYS
I had shaken them, that much was obvious. But they appeared to be made of stern stuff, and it was only a few seconds after Buffy had briefed the new arrival-Angel, who appeared to be a vampire, strangely enough-when she turned to me and asked, "All right, what do we have to do?"
I was pleased that they were so willing to put aside their fear to do what was necessary, and showed that pleasure by not wasting any time. "First, I need to cast a diagnostic spell or two to determine what is necessary." I concentrated and began to weave the appropriate spells. The red-haired girl, Willow, watched me intently: I gathered she was a practitioner of the Art. Not surprising, given what my sapphire ring was telling me about my new allies.
After Caine managed to fool the family with the corpse of a murdered shadow of himself (my brother is quite a piece of work, isn't he?), Fiona decided that at least some of us should have a defense against this little tactic. So she came up with a spell that she cast on my sapphire ring. If I encounter a shadow of one of us, dead or alive, the ring will tell me that fact, and even tell me who the person is a shadow of. The ring was practically leaping off of my hand in telling me there were shadows of Amberites present. Willow: red-haired, highly intelligent, a practitioner of the Art-it didn't take the ring to spot a shadow of Fiona. Giles: studious, taciturn, apparently gifted in the use of arms-clearly a shadow of my brother Benedict. The vampire Angel: handsome, also a gifted fighter, brooding aspect-I wonder how my brother Corwin would feel about being represented in this shadow by a vampire! Xander: loyal, anti-intellectual, a decent fighter in his own right-obviously reflecting Gerard. . .perhaps I should encourage him to weight train. . .he would like the results. Oz seemed to be a reflection of some of the more artistic traits of my brother the King, though his quiet nature was rather different from my youngest brother as I remembered him. But Buffy. . .she wasn't a shadow of one of us at all, and this puzzled me. If anyone in this shadow was a reflection of one of my family, I would expect it to be Buffy, who was apparently the central figure of the entire shadow at that moment. I set aside the minor mystery and finished casting the informational spells. The needed information quickly came to me. I turned to the others, and reported, "We need the following ingredients. . ." and I rattled off a list of twenty ingredients that Willow carefully wrote down, "and I need a local practitioner to help me attune the severing spell correctly; otherwise, my efforts could accidentally trigger the very thing we are trying to stop."
Giles nodded and replied, "Willow and I both have knowledge of the Arts. However, I believe that she is my superior at this point." Willow blushed, and piped up, "Private Willow, reporting for universe-saving duty, sir!" I repressed a smile at this far more innocent aspect of my cynical sister.
Buffy looked over Willow's shoulder at the list and commented, "I have a few of these things at my house. We'll go and get them and bring them back here to conduct the ceremony. Let's motor. . . the night won't last forever." She strode out of the library, Angel at her heels and the others quickly moving to follow. I followed in their wake, impressed at the obvious loyalty she commanded.
The walk was a relatively short and uneventful one, and we approached a two-story house that looked comfortable. Buffy opened the door and motioned for us to follow. "Mom!" she called out, bringing out a blonde woman who resembled a slightly younger Blythe Danner. . .strange, she looked familiar too.
The woman clucked disapprovingly at Buffy and commented, "So, what's wrong? Is the world coming to an e-" I saw her eyes meet mine, and she stopped in what looked like abject shock. "You. . ." she whispered before slumping bonelessly to the carpet. Buffy dropped to the floor and checked her pulse before looking at me in confusion, "She just fainted. . . she'll be all right. . .do you know her?"
I had just realized that I did. . .I looked from Joyce. . .then back to Buffy. . .and the mystery of Buffy's central role in this shadow had abruptly resolved itself. I struggled for a witty phrase to extricate myself from this situation, then fell back on what seemed utterly appropriate, given the gravity of the situation:
"Uh-oh."
As always, comments are welcomed and desired.
BLEYS
"Yes, I think that you can. My name is Bleys, and I need to find the Hellmouth."
The blonde girl seemed taken aback by my reply, and took a moment to think, which gave me a chance to take a good look at her. She was rather petite, being not much larger than Fiona, but I could tell by looking at her that she had done some hard fighting in her young life. Clearly, there was something unusual about this girl. . .and she seemed vaguely familiar for no good reason that I was aware of. She looked casually at me, as if I had simply asked for the time of day and deadpanned, "Hellmouth? Never heard of it."
I sighed: this was going to take some work. "Look, I know that knowledge of the Hellmouth isn't an everyday thing in these parts, but I do know about it. . .and I was also told that the main line of defense against the nasty things that it draws was a bunch of teenagers. Am I correct in assuming that my source was referring to you?"
The girl's eyes narrowed, and I could see evidence of a formidable intelligence regarding me from behind those pretty green orbs. After another moment, she replied bluntly, "Assuming that they were, and that we did know about this Hellmouth that you're talking about, why would we tell some guy on a horse that we've just met? Loose lips sink ships, and all that jazz."
Benedict would certainly approve of her views on security, but still, I would need to convince her to cooperate. "Well, I suppose that you could call the rest of your friends together, since my source suggested that there were more of you, and you could ask me any questions that would make you feel comfortable before letting me know what I wanted to know. That would tend to serve my purposes too, since I had counted on asking for your help in dealing with a messy problem relating to the Hellmouth. Other than that, I don't know what I could do to convince you I'm not an enemy."
"I know!" The blonde whirled in annoyance as the tall, dark-haired boy chimed in. Undaunted, he continued, "How about if he helped us kill those vampires and the two Chaos Demons coming over to attack us?"
The girl and I locked startled glances, then we both turned in the direction he was pointing. Five vampires were approaching, together with. . .they were Chaos Demons! I vaulted out of my saddle and drew my blade, and I could hear the others preparing for combat as Zephyr prudently moved out of the way. I called over my shoulder, "I'll take the Chaos Demons. . .this weapon is very effective against them." Curious, I turned for a moment, and asked, "How did you know that those were Chaos Demons? They're not exactly native to these parts."
The boy smiled grimly and replied, "I heard them described by. . .someone. Slime and antlers-dead giveaway." I laughed at that and charged the two Chaos Demons, my blade Evening Star tracing arcs in the air that made the foul creatures retreat a short distance in dismay. One of the vampires made the mistake of trying to attack me at this point: Evening Star quickly ended the issue with a decapitating blow that left only a pile of burning dust. The demons moved in for the attack, and I assumed a defensive posture, trying to feel out their combat ability. It became rapidly apparent that they were quite good, and the wounds that I gave them only caused light flames before being snuffed: I was going to have to wear them down.
I heard two dying vampire screams behind me; obviously, these kids were pretty good at handling themselves. Good thing, too, as I found myself being sorely pressed by the Chaos Demons-they were just too damned resistant to my Pattern blade, and their own runeblades were giving me some nasty nicks. I was wondering how in hell I was going to salvage this fight when a crossbow bolt hissed over my left shoulder and buried itself in the left eye of one of the demons. It howled and dropped its blade, and I took the opportunity to finish it off with an overhead strike that split its skull and sent its burning body into a heap. I glanced over my shoulder and saw the blond girl was holding a crossbow and was rapidly reloading it. I also noted that her friends were still holding off two vampires. "I've got this one," I called out, not wanting the obviously weaker combatants to risk harm, "go help your friends!" She nodded in acknowledgment, put down the crossbow, and drew out a stake as she moved over to the grimly fighting boys. One on one, the Chaos Demon proved to be less of a challenge, and another minute's of fencing between us resulted in a decapitating blow that sent its flaming head flying off twenty feet, while its smoldering body fell next to its comrades. Breathing a sigh of relief, I turned back to the others.
They were watching me quietly, apparently not quite sure what to say. I decided to break the ice: "Thank you for the assistance, Miss--?"
She was still apparently a bit stunned by the whole thing-it took a moment for her to respond, "I'm Buffy Summers." She pointed at the boy who knew about Chaos Demons and continued, "He's Xander, and the talkative one over there is Oz."
I nodded at Xander and Oz , then asked again, "So, can you take me to the Hellmouth now?"
Buffy sighed, then waved for me to follow. "We need to get the others. Follow us. . .oh, and I think it would be a good idea to find a place to keep your horse. They kind of attract attention here."
I laughed and replied, "Zephyr will be fine here. . .he's not a typical horse." I gave Zephyr a nod and walked up to Buffy. "Let's go."
As we left the scene of the fight, I thought I saw a figure watching us from some distance away. By the time I turned to give the apparition my full attention, it had vanished. I shrugged and continued to follow Buffy.
BUFFY
Giles was working in the library when we walked in. It would have been nice if he had been as visibly surprised as we were after encountering Bleys, but he's far too used to strange visitors at this point to be shocked by someone as "normal" looking as Bleys. Willow is a little less jaded, though, and she visibly perked up as we came in and she noticed the strangely dressed man.
Giles looked over Bleys carefully, then asked, "I take it that you're not a refugee from the local Society for Creative Anachronism?"
Bleys looked annoyed, and I decided to let him off the hook. "His name is Bleys, and we found him in the park just before we ran into a bunch of vampires and Chaos Demons in one of the cemeteries. He killed the Chaos Demons, so we figured that he couldn't be all-bad. He says he's looking for the Hellmouth."
Giles now did look rather perplexed, and his reply was rather hesitant: "Ah yes, I see. Chaos Demons? With slime and antlers?" "Yeah, G-man," piped in Xander, to Giles' obvious annoyance, "deluxe package, right out of the factory."
Bleys cleared his throat, and I decided to let him handle further explanations: "Mr. Giles, I am Bleys, Prince of Amber, and I am here to prevent a major catastrophe regarding this Hellmouth of yours." He looked around the room, evidently concentrating, then pointed to the spot that had twice caused us such a headache. "Unless I'm greatly mistaken, the focal point is right there."
Well, I was impressed, and I could see that the others were too. Giles recovered first, and managed "Ah, yes. . .that would be correct. . .Prince Bleys, is it? The Hellmouth, when opened, manifests its nexus directly on the spot you have just indicated. What is the nature of your interest in it? Also, I must apologize: I'm not familiar with Amber."
Bleys grinned, and I could tell he had used that grin for getting some serious snugglebunnies in the past. "Bleys will be sufficient: I'm not hung up on titles. I wouldn't expect you to be familiar with Amber. . .it's a fair distance from here." He spent the next ten minutes explaining who and what he was, and what Amber was. Suffice it to say, he wigged us out quite a bit. It's a rather unpleasant idea to think that all you do in trying to save the world is just a sideshow, with the real important stuff going on elsewhere. Did this all mean that we weren't real? I looked at the expressions on my friend's faces, and could see that similar thoughts were occurring to them. Of course, this guy could just be a nut who happened to be a badass, but my instincts told me otherwise. Giles looked fascinated (of course) then abruptly darted into his office, bringing out a book with the picture of a unicorn on the cover. I snorted and commented, "Where's the little weasel? He's all right with this research crap . . .why not let him be useful for a change?"
Giles looked at me as if to give me a lecture about respecting one's Watcher, then thought better of it. "I sent Wesley home. I decided that the annoyance accompanying his presence exceeded the value of his cataloging efforts, which is saying something." He opened the book and turned a few pages before saying, "Yes. . .the cult of the Unicorn. They believed that the course of the Universe was set by a small number of archetypal beings whose dominant traits were reflected in our everyday world." He closed the book and commented, "Remarkable. . .and your abilities let you travel from universe to universe with relative ease?"
Bleys nodded, and elaborated, "All shadows-what we call the alternate universes-take their form from Amber, with distortions created by distance and proximity to the Courts of Chaos, to which your shadow is relatively 'close.' Also, individuals of importance in a particular shadow are often shadows of the members of the royal family of Amber, since the nature of our existence causes such shadows to be cast even at great distances from Amber." He smiled again, but did not elaborate further.
I had had enough of cryptic for one night, and I interrupted, "All right, so you're Archetype Boy. Good for you. Now what is the problem with the Hellmouth that required someone who is obviously important as you to come out this far?"
Bleys looked a little annoyed, but he quickly recovered and began to explain. "A link has been created between your Hellmouth and the Logrus of Chaos, which is the central source of true power in the Courts of Chaos. This link will draw more and more powerful creatures to your location for a few days longer. . .then the amount of energy pouring through the link will destabilize the Hellmouth, causing it to explode, destroying this shadow utterly and devastating the ones nearby."
I could see the blood draining out of more than a few faces, and I'm sure I didn't look much better. I was getting so damned sick of having to save the world every other week. . .and with Faith on suspension, we were shorthanded. I was thinking of a clever reply to this serious piece of bad news when Angel walked in: "What's going on?"
Somehow, even Angel's arrival wasn't making me feel any better. . .we were in deep trouble.
BLEYS
I had shaken them, that much was obvious. But they appeared to be made of stern stuff, and it was only a few seconds after Buffy had briefed the new arrival-Angel, who appeared to be a vampire, strangely enough-when she turned to me and asked, "All right, what do we have to do?"
I was pleased that they were so willing to put aside their fear to do what was necessary, and showed that pleasure by not wasting any time. "First, I need to cast a diagnostic spell or two to determine what is necessary." I concentrated and began to weave the appropriate spells. The red-haired girl, Willow, watched me intently: I gathered she was a practitioner of the Art. Not surprising, given what my sapphire ring was telling me about my new allies.
After Caine managed to fool the family with the corpse of a murdered shadow of himself (my brother is quite a piece of work, isn't he?), Fiona decided that at least some of us should have a defense against this little tactic. So she came up with a spell that she cast on my sapphire ring. If I encounter a shadow of one of us, dead or alive, the ring will tell me that fact, and even tell me who the person is a shadow of. The ring was practically leaping off of my hand in telling me there were shadows of Amberites present. Willow: red-haired, highly intelligent, a practitioner of the Art-it didn't take the ring to spot a shadow of Fiona. Giles: studious, taciturn, apparently gifted in the use of arms-clearly a shadow of my brother Benedict. The vampire Angel: handsome, also a gifted fighter, brooding aspect-I wonder how my brother Corwin would feel about being represented in this shadow by a vampire! Xander: loyal, anti-intellectual, a decent fighter in his own right-obviously reflecting Gerard. . .perhaps I should encourage him to weight train. . .he would like the results. Oz seemed to be a reflection of some of the more artistic traits of my brother the King, though his quiet nature was rather different from my youngest brother as I remembered him. But Buffy. . .she wasn't a shadow of one of us at all, and this puzzled me. If anyone in this shadow was a reflection of one of my family, I would expect it to be Buffy, who was apparently the central figure of the entire shadow at that moment. I set aside the minor mystery and finished casting the informational spells. The needed information quickly came to me. I turned to the others, and reported, "We need the following ingredients. . ." and I rattled off a list of twenty ingredients that Willow carefully wrote down, "and I need a local practitioner to help me attune the severing spell correctly; otherwise, my efforts could accidentally trigger the very thing we are trying to stop."
Giles nodded and replied, "Willow and I both have knowledge of the Arts. However, I believe that she is my superior at this point." Willow blushed, and piped up, "Private Willow, reporting for universe-saving duty, sir!" I repressed a smile at this far more innocent aspect of my cynical sister.
Buffy looked over Willow's shoulder at the list and commented, "I have a few of these things at my house. We'll go and get them and bring them back here to conduct the ceremony. Let's motor. . . the night won't last forever." She strode out of the library, Angel at her heels and the others quickly moving to follow. I followed in their wake, impressed at the obvious loyalty she commanded.
The walk was a relatively short and uneventful one, and we approached a two-story house that looked comfortable. Buffy opened the door and motioned for us to follow. "Mom!" she called out, bringing out a blonde woman who resembled a slightly younger Blythe Danner. . .strange, she looked familiar too.
The woman clucked disapprovingly at Buffy and commented, "So, what's wrong? Is the world coming to an e-" I saw her eyes meet mine, and she stopped in what looked like abject shock. "You. . ." she whispered before slumping bonelessly to the carpet. Buffy dropped to the floor and checked her pulse before looking at me in confusion, "She just fainted. . . she'll be all right. . .do you know her?"
I had just realized that I did. . .I looked from Joyce. . .then back to Buffy. . .and the mystery of Buffy's central role in this shadow had abruptly resolved itself. I struggled for a witty phrase to extricate myself from this situation, then fell back on what seemed utterly appropriate, given the gravity of the situation:
"Uh-oh."
As always, comments are welcomed and desired.