Mamoru looked on the petite blond that stood before him. What could have made him leave the one he really loved and never got over? Mamoru remembered the night he broke it off with her as if it were yesterday. He remembered putting the cheerful face on for Kendra when inside he was being ripped in two.
* * *
It has been almost a year since he broke it off with Usagi. Everywhere he looked he thought he would see her walking toward him. Everytime he saw someone w ith long blond hair he swore it was her and would run after them, but it was always for naught. Mamoru looked at his watch as he realized he was late to pick up Kendra. Quickly he ran back to his apartment building into the parking place and ran to his blue Jaguar.
Mamoru and Kendra were going to a party tonight. Just what he needed to get his mind back in place. When he thought of Kendra he smiled at the thought that she was carrying his child. She was almost to the end of her second trimester. At first he thought they were still to early in the relationship to be having a child but it was already to late, the baby was already on it's way. Without even realizing it his mind drifted off to Chibi Usa. The thought never crossed his mind that the daughter he had grown to love would no longer make it to this world. Just one more thing to add the pressure of his love for his Usako.
Mamoru was glad when he finally showed up at Kendra's place. She looked beautiful in her pregnant body. I bet Usagi would be even more beautiful Mamoru thought as he saw her. Mamoru stepped out of his care meeting her half way. The couple embraced as Mamoru turned back to his car. "Are we ready for Guy's party."
"Sure I bet it's going to be a lot of fun."
"Whenever you feel you want to come home just let me know."
"I will thank you Mamoru." Kendra smiled as he put her into the car. Kendra didn't know how she was going to do it but she wanted to break it of with Mamoru tonight. Whenever she was with him his mind was always someplace else. Probably with that girl in Japan, what's her name Usagi? Mamoru never seem'd to realize just how much he talked about her. There were times when she would walk back into his bedroom with a glass of water to drink and catch him looking at her framed picture. It never bothered her much until...Kendra sighed as Mamoru pulled up to Guy's home for the surprise party.
Mamoru and Kendra walked in the front door greeted by all their friends. "Is Guy here yet?" Mamaru asked quietly.
"No we aren't expecting him for another 10 minutes." A girl answered from the crowd.
"Good I didn't want to miss the surprise." Kendra said happily.
Mamoru took Kendra by the hand and lead her to a small couch up against the wall. Kendra looked around the room and when she glances back to Mamoru he is staring off into space. Now is a better time then ever She thinks to herself. Softly she puts her hand on Mamaru's knee and he jumps as if he didn't even realize she was there.
"You were thinking of her again weren't you?"
"Thinking of who?"
"That girl in Japan."
"Don't be silly."
"Do you think I'm blind Mamoru Chiba? Do you think I don't notice things?"
"What are you talking about?"
"You know very well what I'm talking about. After spending a night with you I would go get us something to drink. You must think that it takes me so long to get them cause whenever I walk back you are staring at her picture. Aren't you." Mamoru realized then there was no point in denying it so he just kept his mouth shut. Kendra just looked at him realizing now she was gonna get no response from him. "Then there was that time in bed when you called me Usagi. I never knew her name until that night. And since then you have done it countless times. How many times are you gonna call me Usagi in bed before you realize you still love her? Do you have any idea how much that hurt me."
Without responding Mamoru got up and walked over to the bar they had set up at the party. Sifting through the bottles he picked up the bottle of Tequila and walked to the other side of the room. Kendra looked on thinking she'd have to wait till he brings her home to finish the conversation.
Mamoru sat along on the couch wasting no times between drinks. The bottle of Tequila was almost gone. He knew he was drunk but he didn't care he had a right to be, didn't he? Didn't she know how much he and Usagi had been through? Didn't she care that he jeopardized his whole future to be with her? Did she automatically assume he could forget his Usako with the drop of a hat? Mamoru got up and staggered through the guests and back up to the bar placing the empty bottle on the counter.
"I was wondering where that went." The bartender said as he picked up the empty bottle. "I'm just glad I had an extra in case someone else decided they wanted some."
Mamoru didn't say a word only pointed to another bottle. The bartender shook his head. "I think you've already had enough sir maybe you should call a cab to go home." Mamoru cursed the bartender under his breath and turned back to the crowd to have Kendra grab him by the arm.
"Mamoru I want to go home..." Mamoru merely nodded and managed to walk fine though the crowd. See I'm not as drunk as the bartender thinks I am. Mamoru smiled to himself as he tried every key in the lock of his car finally getting to the one that actually belonged.
Kendra sat silent in the car. She was gonna tell him just before she got out. Finally she looked over and he was starting the car. What was taking him so long? As soon as the car started the automatic locks kicked in and he hit the gas real quick and then jerked it to a stop. Softly he hit the gas one more time and made his way down the road.
"Mamoru are you drunk?"
"No I'm not -hic- drunk."
"Yes you are, pull over so I can drive you home and I'll walk from there."
"NO! I'm fine." Mamoru jerked the wheel sending the car into the wrong lane then quickly jerked it back bringing it back to his own.
"Mamoru please let me drive!" Kendra pleaded with a tear in her eye. Before she could say another word Mamoru jerked to the right sending them into a telephone pole. Mamoru hit his head on the steering wheel while Kendra was thrown into the dashboard.
* * *
The police and rescue workers showed up in time to get Mamoru and Kendra out of the car before the car erupted into flames. That being the only good point that neither of them were wearing their seatbelts. Mamoru and Kendra were both placed on backboards and taken to the emergency room for further evaluation. As far as they could see they both just had minor bumps and bruises.
Mamoru opened his eyes in a strange room. He looked around realizing now he was in a hospital bed. His hand quickly went to his forehead as he groaned. "Oh my head." As if on que a nurse came in and asked to take his temp and check his pulse.
"I see you're finally awake. You've been asleep since they brought you in."
"Really? When was I brought in?"
"Yesterday night Mr. Chiba. I'm very glad to say that you just have the one bump on your head."
"What about Usagi?"
"I'm sorry sir but there was no Usagi in the car."
"OH I mean Kendra I'm sorry."
"She's...well she's been crying her eyes out."
"Why what happened?"
"Are you the father of the baby?"
"Yes I am."
"Then you do deserve to hear this. In the car crash she was thrown against the dashboard. Your airbags didn't work. She lost the baby." The nurse closed his report after filling in his vitals.
Mamoru couldn't believe what he'd done. Why didn't he remember what had happened? "What room is she in?" "214 sir but I don't think she wants to see anybody."
Without another word Mamoru jumped from his bed and ran down the hall to 214. When he got to the open door he slowly made his way in. "Kendra..."
All he got in response was a pillow in the face. "Get out of here I never want to speak to you again."
"Kendra I'm sorry...I didn't mean..."
"Why didn't you let me drive? Why did you have to be so stubborn."
"I'm sorry but I don't remember what happened."
"Of course you wouldn't you were so drunk!! Don't think I'm not bringing this to court!!"
Kendra rolled over turning her back to him as he slowly turned and walked out of the room
* * *
Mamoru walked into his apartment room, still thinking of the pain that he had caused Kendra. Was that now his fate, was he doomed to hurt the people he had allowed to get close to him. Mamoru deep inside regardless of what he felt for Usagi he cared for Kendra and didn't want to inflict any hurt upon her. Throwing his jacket on the couch on the way by he walked into his bedroom and opening the drawer of his nightstand pulling the picture of Usagi out as she stared deeply into her eyes. Quickly he grabbed a piece of paper and began to write her a letter. Not exactly sure why but he was hoping she would find it in her heart to forgive him.
When he was finished writing the letter he folded it neatly and placed it into an envelope sealing it then quickly addressing it to her. As he was about to get up and put his jacket back on so he could mail it there was a knock at his door.
Mamoru slowly went over and opened the door, only to have a man hand him a white piece of paper folded twice over. "I'm sorry but you are asked to appear in court in one-month time." The man bowed his head and then put his hat back on as he turned and walked down the hall. Mamaru opened up the paper reading its content. "Involuntary Manslaughter!?" Mamoru dropped the letter he had addressed to Usagi into the garbage can where he had told her everything about the accident, about how he never stopped loving her. How could he send it now? She would never forgive him now.
Mamoru turned and walked over to his couch and fell onto it. This meant he would have to find a lawyer. Wait a minute, Guy was a lawyer...he would help right? No he wouldn't cause Kendra has been a friend of him since they were kids, he wouldn't do a case against her. Mamoru dropped his head into his hands unsure of what he was going to do.
* * *
Mamoru sat in the courtroom waiting for the verdict of what was to be his fate. It had been only two weeks since the trial had started. He was right Guy defended Kendra. Kendra was lucky; Guy was an excellent lawyer he knew what he was doing. Finally the judge came back from his chambers.
"All rise" The bailiff said while everyone complied. When the Judge sat back down everyone follows suit.
The Judge folded his arms in front of him leaning forward. "Well this is just a diar case and not and easy one to come to a decision with. It was clear that this man was drunk the night of the accident and should not have been driving in the first place. Then there's the fact that he was asked to stop driving and he refused. So my judgment went by the evidence at hand. I sentence the defendant Mamoru Chiba to 2 years in the state penitentiary for Involuntary Manslaughter." The judge hit his gavel to the desk once and stood and left the courtroom.
Mamoru just sat there dropping his head down. Deep down he knew there was no way he was going to get out of this but yet he still carried the hope that the Judge would see it his way. Mamoru stood to have two cops walk over and he held his hands out as they placed him in handcuffs, then walked him out of the back of the courtroom.
In jail Mamoru pretty much kept to himself, the memory of Usagi the only thing keeping him going. In a small box under his bed he had many unsent letters he never had the courage to let cross her eyes. Once a week he had written letters to her as if she were his diary. He told about the fights that broke out and anything he felt that he just wanted to say. The years went by slowly he thought that they would never come to and end. On his 20th month he was brought up for parole. But he wanted to do the full two years. Besides by the time his parole hearings were over the two years would have been up.
Mamoru was glad when his last day in jail sentence was over. His only possession, the letters he had written to Usagi. His black hair fell just above his shoulders and a goatee grew on his face. First thing he was gonna do was get a hair cut, it needed it. Mamoru caught the bus back to New York City where he had to meet up with his parole officer. For three years he would have to meet with someone, meaning it was three more years before he could return to his Usako.
Mamoru went to a nearby hair place getting his haircut back to the way it was once before. With a slight smile he decided he would keep the goatee. For how long he wasn't sure. The next day he had a meeting with a Mr. Alex Dosticof.
Alex had somehow managed to get his job back at the Computer Company. Mamoru was still surprised at that. He thought he would be going to work at some fast food place when he got back. Once a week Mamoru met with Alex. The two became pretty good friends; mostly cause Alex was the same age as Mamoru and Alex loved hearing stories about Japan. Occasionally Mamoru would show him pictures that he had taken when he was visiting the different places in Japan. The one picture that caught Alex's attention the most was of the blond looking to be about 16.
"WOW who's that?"
Mamoru smiled seeing the picture, it was one he thought he had lost. "Oh that's Usagi Tsukino."
"Usagi huh? She's cute...she seeing anybody?"
Mamoru sighed and looked away. "I'm not sure, she could be, I haven't talked to her in over three years."
"Why would you stop talking to her?"
"Because I thought I fell in love with someone else."
"You mean you were dating?!?"
"Yeah we were. I called her one day three years ago telling her I met someone else and wasn't coming home for the summer. And of course you know what happened after that."
"Oh man...why haven't you tried to talk to her since?"
Mamoru pulled out the shoebox full of written letters to her that he wrote while in jail. "You could say I tried."
"WOW how many is there?"
"104...I wrote one every week while in jail."
"Damn man, you still love her don't you."
"More then anything…I don't know what possessed me to leave her. I never once got over her. Even when I was with Kendra she was always running through my head. Kendra even accused me of calling her name out when in bed."
"Ouch!!"
"Yeah tell me about it."
Thoughout the rest of Mamoru's parole Alex tried to get Mamoru to call Usagi or write her to see if she still cared for him and if she did to make a move. But Mamoru never would, all he could say is that he wanted to do it in person. He couldn't break her heart over the phone again. Alex had managed to convince him to call an old friend though. One day he called up Rei Hino an old friend and a close friend to Usagi. Rei told him how Usagi was currently dating a guy named Tetsua. That right there told Mamoru that Usagi had gotten over him and has moved on. Rei wanted to tell him more but Mamoru wouldn't have it and said he would talk to her again soon.
* * *
It's been six years since Mamoru stepped onto Japanese soil. He had missed it so much. As he was walking down the street in Tokyo he saw so many new faces. So many new stores. But there was one place that never changed. The arcade still stood. Slowly he walked into the building seeing a young man with brown hair standing behind the counter.
"Hello sir, can I help you?"
"No I'm just looking around."
"Okay if you need anything just let me know."
Mamoru walked over to his old table and looked out the window when he saw her walking up the road. The sun shown on her making her stand out like and Angel. A smile crept on his face when he saw the others walking with her. The smile she gave radiating for all to see. Quickly he got up and walked out of the Arcade and followed behind them making sure not to be seen. When everyone broke off in their own directions; it was Rei that he followed.
Mamoru followed quietly behind her until she arrived at the Museum. Without even turning around she spoke to him. "Are you gonna follow me all day or do you plan on saying hello?"
Mamoru couldn't help the smile that crept on his face. "Hey Rei."
"Bout time you came back what kept you?"
"I'll explain later. Are you and the girls getting together tonight?"
"Yeah actually we are. We are going to the movies."
"Oh..."
"Why don't you come along...You'll be able to see Usagi."
"I couldn't."
"Oh come on...I'll convince her before we leave."
"We?"
"Yeah we! Me and Usagi live in the same apartment."
"You two live together?" Mamoru gave her a funny look.
"Yes as a matter of fact we do. After you called her and told her you found someone else it was me she always came to. We became really close friends. In our second year at University we got an apartment together."
"Usagi went to University? What did she take up?"
"Pre-med. She wants to become a doctor."
"That's what I wanted to become..."
"Yeah I know, I think that's why she did it. She's actually only two years away from her dream."
"That's great. So what time are you guys meeting at the Movie Theater?"
"8:00 I will tell her some story about Ami bringing Greg which she already is and then we will meet you there."
"Okay then see you at 8." Mamoru smiled as Rei turned and walked up the steps to the Museum and he put his hands into his blazer and continued down the path. He was going to see Usagi tonight. What would he say? What would he do? He looked down at his cloths thinking that was fine but inside he was a wreck. Quickly he made it back to his new apartment and paced back and forth till the clock said 7:30. As he was about the walk out he was interrupted by a telephone call.
"Hello? Oh hi Rei. The more the merrier huh? Did she suspect that you wanted someone else to come? I'll try and follow you in to the Movie Theater. Okay then see you later." Mamoru hung up the phone and went back and opened his door stepping out.
He waited in the entrance to and alley for about 10 minutes when he saw Usagi and Rei running up the walk he figured now would be a good time to walk across the street so he would be there before them but leave it to his Usako to run right into him.
"Oh I'm sorry..." He heard her angelic voice say. He was surprise how grown up she sounded now. As she turned and went to continue her way to the Theater he couldn't help it he reached out and grabbed her arm.
"Wait..." Wait what am I doing? He quickly let got and went down the road leaving Usagi totally confused. Lucky for him she brushed it off. He walked past Rei who gave him a face of 'oops' when Usagi and she started down Rei turned to him mouthing 'sorry' to him and he just nodded.
Mamoru was glad when they were right next to the Theater. Rei and Usagi raced across the street only to be accompanied by a group of laughter. Mamoru slowly walked up behind them standing in the light allowing all but Usagi to see him. Everyone stood and gasped as they saw him. That's when he did it.
"Hey Usagi-ckan..." He knew by how she reacted she knew it was him. That's when she turned and faced him. She looked so beautiful. So grown up.
"Mamoru-kun?!" She said looking into his eyes.