Title: I was made to crush
you (a prequel)
Synopsis: Why does everybody so mean to Spike? The
truth behind Dawn's attitude towards him. A prequel to 'I
was made to love you'.
Note: A sequel to "Crushed". After
seeing 'I was made to love you' and witnessing a sudden
turn-about of the characters' (esp. Dawn's) attitude
towards Spike, I felt compelled to write this short fic
to explain her "motivations" in doing so.
Rating: G
Date: Wednesday, 21 February, 2001 : 11:16:55 PM
Written by: The Resident Web Vampyr © 2001.
Credits: Buffy, the Vampire Slayer is a property
of its creator Joss Whedon & the powers that be.
Music: I wanna be
sedated by The Ramones
Characters in play: Buffy Dawn Spike.
a
p r e q u e l.
p a r t f o u r.
"Dawn?"
"Huh?" Dawn replied. She was sitting on Buffy's
bed, thinking about the possibility of inviting Spike
back into their house.
"Dawn, if you're thinking of inviting Spike back
into our house, think again," warned Buffy.
"What are you talking about?"
Buffy knows how impressionistic teenage girls are, Dawn
included. How a cool hair and some cool clothes can make
up for any flaw a person, in this case a vampire, may
have. Buffy didn't blame her younger sister at all; she
was once a teenager too. And she fell in love with
someone dead. But Spike was different. They couldn't
fully trust him, nor think of him as anything other than
a cold-blooded killer.
"Dawn, Spike tried to kill me tonight," said
Buffy.
"What?!"
"Well, not exactly..." said Buffy hesitantly,
"He chained me in his crypt and tried to force me to
admit my feelings for him."
"Pfft," Dawn could not believe what Buffy was
saying. "H-He chained you? I don't understand? How
did that happen? W-What did you tell him?" she
asked.
"I told him, the only chance he had with me was when
I was unconscious," Buffy paused. "Remember his
girlfriend, Drusilla?"
Dawn nodded. She remembered that lunatic vampire, she was
the one who killed the other slayer, Kendra.
"She was in town, they had been feeding again. Spike
is feeding again," said Buffy darkly.
Surprised by what her sister told her, Dawn said,
"It couldn't be... he-he was so good to me, I-I felt
safe with him..."
"Spike's a killer Dawn! This is what I have been
trying to explain to you! He even offered to kill
Drusilla for me!" Buffy shuddered, "Her
girlfriend Drusilla! C-Can you imagine what that means?
He's not only obsessed with me, but he's also willing to
kill her just to prove himself!"
Dawn fell silent. She felt betrayed. She was starting to
trust him, to be friends with him...and now this? If
Spike was willing to kill to prove his feelings, it won't
be long before he goes back to his old self, killing
people and drinking human blood. Ew! she thought,
embarrassed at herself for thinking that Spike could've
been her friend.
"Dawn," said Buffy, "I hope that by
telling you what happened, you would think twice about
letting him into our house and into our lives."
Buffy paused, "I know I did."
"Huh?"
"As much as I hate to admit it, I actually thought
that-that maybe Spike had changed," Buffy confessed.
"I mean, he helped me in the past, with or without
money involved. With Adam, with that queller demon and
now Glory... Ugh!" she said in frustration. "I
can't believe I left you and mom in his care! I even told
him some-stuff!" I trusted him, I let him
comfort me on the porch when I was depressed with the
whole mom-tumor thing Buffy shoved the thought
aside, but it came creeping back. "God!"
Dawn reached out for Buffy's hand, trying to calm her
down, "Don't worry, he's already uninvited in our
house. And in our lives."
p a r t f i v e.
"Ba-ba-baba, baba-ba-baba, I wanna be
sedated..."
Spike grabbed another piece of a drawing from the floor.
He had gathered most of the pictures and sketches he made
for his Buffy shrine after landing on top and crashing it
earlier that night. He was in a fairly good mood even
though he'd just been beaten by three women, shot with an
arrow in the back, and rejected by the woman he loved. He
had gotten used to it ever since he was chipped: pig
Spike, kick the Spike, evil dead Spike!
No one really cared what he feels, what he had been going
through. He wasn't stupid, he still knew what was right
and what was wrong. And this feeling for the slayer was
definitely...wrong.
"If she only knew how feeling this way was killing
me," he whispered, shaking his head and noting the
irony of the fact that he was already dead.
"...Nothing to do, no where to go, oh, I wanna be
sedated! " Spike sounded off.
Bet Buffy already said silly tittle-tattles to her
friends about what happened tonight. Can't wait to see
how they'll react. Giles would just probably sip his tea
and look into his books for some explanation on my
unusual fondness for the slayer. Willow, what would she
say about me that I don't already know? Xander? He's a
birdbrain, he wouldn't even think that I've changed.
We've shared a couple of beers and a basement, he knows
I'm harmless. And don't even start with the bite-sized
one; telling those vampire stories won't be for nothing,
he chuckled. No need to worry. If Buffy won't speak
to me, there's another way to her-her friends.
"...Hurry hurry hurry, before I go insane. I can't
control my fingers, I can't control my brain..."
Spike dressed the mannequin with the blue sweater and
placed the blonde locks on its head. "What would I
do without you, Summers?" He grinned and continued
to talk to the dummy, "You may not want me now, but
you will want me sooner or later..."
* * *
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