Chapter 3-
By Dannette Lawrence
Summary: Dawson and Joey are getting closer and the same old question has come up again... should we give it another try?
"So what do we do now?"
Joey had barely caught Dawson's question through her sobs, she was
crying so hard and only half the reason she was crying was because of Pacey.
She was mostly crying because of the situation her and Dawson were in,
yet again they were brought back together. No matter how many times they
told each other that it was over, somehow they were always brought back
together and Joey was getting sick of it. She was sick of shedding tears
over a lost love, she wanted it to be all over, she wanted the happy ending
she so richly deserved, either it be with Dawson or by herself, she wanted
the happy ending.
"I-I don't know"
A part of Joey wished that she never made that phone call, because
if she never made that phone call she would still be with Pacey and not
miserable and heartbroken. Joey knew she wasn't heartbroken over Pacey,
they had fought so much lately, there had been so much tension and she
knew it was only a matter of time until one of them would break it off
and Joey had hoped it was Pacey, but in a way it was really her who had
ended the relationship. She ended the relationship the minute she picked
up that phone, she ended the relationship the second she entered Dawson's
room, she ended the relationship when she fell asleep in Dawson's arms.
"Could you ever love me like you love him?
Pacey was right, she never answered him, back then she didn't know how to answer that question and she still didn't. Dawson was everything to her; he was the best friend, the unattainable crush, the boyfriend, the shoulder to cry on... everything. She had loved him for so many years that even when she wanted the love for him to stop, it wouldn't; it couldn't. Joey had wanted to hate him so badly when he forced her to send her own father to jail, but she didn't, she had pretended to but she never hated him, she could never hate him. She had tried not to think of him when she was away with Pacey, she had tried desperately to just let her mind think of Pacey and only Pacey but it didn't matter what she wanted or what she told herself, her mind always wandered to Dawson. It was like a disease for Joey Potter, she was plagued to love Dawson Leery for the rest of her life, it didn't matter how many boyfriends she had in the future, she would always measure them up to Dawson, always.
"Joey?"
Dawson gazed at the still crying girl beside him, she seemed to
be in deep thought and he really didn't want to disturb her from it but
the odd silence between them was getting to him, he needed noise. Yelling.
Screaming. Anything. Anything to get his mind off of putting his arms around
Joey and cradling her in his arms and whispering in her ear, he knew he
couldn't do that, that would just make things more complicated for him
and Joey.
"Dawson please can we just sit here? I just need to sit here, please
stay with me"
Dawson nodded and put his arms around Joey and closed his eyes when
she leaned into him, Dawson leaned his head against the wall and swallowed
hard when he felt Joey's hot tears soak through his tee shirt.
"Yeah Joey we can"
Dawson knew that she was already asleep, he knew she probably didn't
hear the words, but he felt as if they needed to be said. Something needed
to be said, it was so silent in Joey's house now, Joey's whimpers and sobs
couldn't be heard anymore, only the rustling of the leaves outside and
his deep breathing could be heard.
Pacey threw himself down on his bed, he didn't even bother to kick
off his shoes or take off his coat, he closed his eyes hoping everything
would just go away. A day ago, he had everything he wanted; he had Joey,
the girl he had fallen in love with and now everything was gone. Pacey
didn't have Joey anymore, did he ever? Did he ever really have Joey? Sure
she was there and she was with him but whenever they were together he knew
she was somewhere else, or with someone else. Sometimes he would stare
at her and see this dreamy look in her eyes, the kind of dreamy look she
used to get whenever Dawson would look at her. He knew that look all too
well, he remembered how Joey would start smiling like a big buffoon whenever
her and Dawson were together, he had hated how Dawson had that sort of
power over Joey.
"Hey Pacey"
Pacey forced his eyes open, he grumbled something under his breath
as Gretchen made her way into his room. He really didn't want to talk to
Gretchen, but then he saw the look on her face, she had got dumped.
"Hurricane Dawson and Joey hit you as well?"
Pacey moved over in his bed allowing some room for Gretchen to sit
down. Gretchen stared at Pacey and knew he wasn't going to talk.
"Well since you're not going to talk, I might as well do the talking.
Dawson and me broke up, you were right Pace. I should of seen the signs,
I mean I'm usually good at realizing that my boyfriend is in love with
another girl but I guess I was so caught up in him I really didn't want
to believe that his heart belonged to another. Sometimes it's hard to let
go, it's not their fault that they haven't exactly moved on..."
Pacey rolled over on his side staring at the wall.
"It still hurts."
Gretchen opened her mouth to say something to try to comfort Pacey,
to ease his pain, but she knew there was nothing she could do, the pain
would only go away when he decided to cope and she knew he wasn't ready
for that.
:::The next day:::
Joey walked through the halls of Capeside High slowly, her eyes were back to their original color, they were no longer red and puffy from crying. She had her long hair pulled up in a ponytail and she wore a white long sleeved shirt with black pants. She looked like she usually did and in a way she felt like she used to do, it was like she was getting in touch with this part of her she had long forgotten, a part of her she pushed away when she got together with Pacey, a part of her that belonged to Dawson. It was funny, she had slept the best she had for months and ironically it was in Dawson's arms. He had held her all night, making sure she was safe and then he left early in the morning, leaving a short letter behind.
Dear Jo-
I had to go home, I wish I could of stayed until you woke up,
but I really had to get home before my mom and dad started calling everybody,
you know how they are. I know things have gotten so complicated so fast
but I promise you, we will get through this and we will get through this
together. It takes two to tango. I know stupid, but for some reason it
sums up things pretty well. Well I am going to go home, get dressed and
then go to school, see you there.
-Dawson
P.S. Jo no matter what kind of things life throws at you, I will always be here.
Joey let her brown eyes scan through the hallway searching for Dawson,
she pushed her way through the crowd of teenagers busily chatting about
various things, none which really interested her, she just really wanted
to see Dawson. Joey stopped searching when she saw the familar blonde haired
boy at his locker, Joey smiled and walked over to the locker and leaned
against the one right next to it.
"Hi"
Dawson looked up from his locker to see Joey, he smiled. She looked
better, her eyes were no longer puffy and red and she seemed better; she
was actually smiling and he thought he saw some sort of twinkle in her
eyes, but he could of been mistaken.
"Hi Jo. Sorry about leaving..."
"I got the letter Dawson, I just want to say thank you for being
there for me"
Dawson smiled and shut his locker and turned to Joey, their eyes
connected and for that second, it was like it was just them in the world,
just like old times.
"Have you talked or seen Pacey yet?"
Joey shook her head and grunted something under her breath causing
Dawson to look up, he smiled and waved at Jen who was making her way over
to them.
"Be nice Joey"
Joey hit Dawson on the shoulder playfully and waved at Jen once
she walked up to them.
"Hey Joey, Dawson. You guy seem awfully cozy"
Jen smiled, showing that she was only playing around. Jen looked
at Dawson and then to Joey and saw something between them.
"Where's Pacey?"
Joey felt her throat dry up at Jen's question.
"I wouldn't know he dumped me"
Joey hefted her backpack on her left shoulder and turned to Dawson
before leaving.
"Meet you at lunch?"
Dawson nodded, she smiled and walked off to history class. Dawson
watched her leave, his eyes watching her for the longest time, they only
advanced to Jen once she cleared her throat loudly.
"He dumped her? Why?"
Dawson put his backpack on and bit his bottom lip not knowing how
to really describe the whole situation Jen, it was the kind of situation
where you had to be there to understand it.
"It's complicated"
With those two words Dawson walked off towards English class. Jen
watched Dawson leave and then turned to Jack who had made his way over
to her.
"Oh great. Joey and Dawson are going down that path again."
Jack looked at Jen confused.
"What path?"
Jen pulled Jack with her.
"The path to disaster. They are falling in love with each other
again, well they never stopped loving each other but they are going down
that path again, they're going to give their relationship another try"
Dawson looked up at the clock and smiled relieved when he heard the
class bell ringing telling him that the class was over. Dawson grabbed
his books and practically ran out of science class, he didn't want someone
to ask him to stay back, he just wanted to get out. He had felt Pacey staring
at him throughout the whole class, he felt Pacey's eyes burning a hole
in the back of his head. Dawson looked at his watch and smiled again, it
was lunchtime. Dawson walked into the cafeteria searching for Joey, he
felt his heart skip a beat when he saw her, she was sitting at the cafeteria
table that they used to sit at when they were going out, her hair was down
from the ponytail and a few strands of her hair fell in her face, she stared
down at the lunch. Dawson felt an old feeling enter his body, the feeling
he used to have everyday when he used to be with her, he used to count
the minutes until lunch, he would practically run out of class and into
the cafeteria pushing people out of his way, and he would only stop acting
like a maniac when he got to *their* table, it was like it was happening
all over again and they weren't even together.
"Hey there"
Joey looked up from her lunch and smiled big when she saw Dawson.
"Hey"
Dawson sat down next to Joey and pulled out a paper bag.
"You brought your own lunch Dawson? What happened to living through
the school lunches because they were a part of the high school experience?"
Dawson took out a peanut and butter sandwich.
"I was a naive boy back then Jo"
Joey cracked a smile and pulled out a paper bag, Dawson laughed.
"I was hiding it, I hate school lunches"
Pacey got his lunch and walked over to the table Jack and Jen were
sitting at and threw his tray down.
"Ugh, is it just me or do these lunches get more gross everyday?"
Pacey looked up from his food when he didn't hear Jen or Jack say
anything, he looked at them and then turned his head to where they were
looking and he froze at what he saw.
Joey and Dawson.