Batman: The Drunken Dark Knight Returns IIIIII
Commissioner Gordon tapped his foot impatiently as he waited outside the
skyscraper for any news from the city's trusted protector, Batman. Harv the Marv
ambled over to him. "Uh, any word from Batman yet?"
"Shuddup, Harv."
Suddenly, noise blared into the negotiation phone. Gordon yanked it up to his ear.
"Batman? Batman! Is that you?"
"Yes... Gordon... captured... need.. demands.... Joker wants... beer. He wants .... lots
of beer. And several strippers.. eight kegs... some stag films.... one of those portable
toilets... a tent... and some shrimp," said the voice over the phone.
"Batman! Are you alright?" asked Gordon, now filled with fear.
"Yes... they won't release the hostages until they get what they want."
"Done! Harv, you heard them! Get everything the Joker wants! Pronto!!"
Thirty-three minutes and twenty seconds later, Batman, Poison Ivy, a naked
Catwoman, Harley Quinn, Joker, Alex Trebek, eighteen drunken hostages, and a
bunch of weeds were partying to loud music, strippers, and porn films, with tons of
beer at their disposal.
"Batman!! When is the Joker going to release you and the hostages?" asked Gordon
over the phone.
"Uh... tomorrow morning around two... enough time for me to have some fun,"
laughed Batman as he tossed the phone out the window and walked towards the tent
with Poison Ivy.
Commissioner Gordon tapped his foot impatiently as he waited outside the
skyscraper for any news from the city's trusted protector, Batman. Harv the Marv
ambled over to him. "Uh, any word from Batman yet?"
"Shuddup, Harv."
Suddenly, noise blared into the negotiation phone. Gordon yanked it up to his ear.
"Batman? Batman! Is that you?"
"Yes... Gordon... captured... need.. demands.... Joker wants... beer. He wants .... lots
of beer. And several strippers.. eight kegs... some stag films.... one of those portable
toilets... a tent... and some shrimp," said the voice over the phone.
"Batman! Are you alright?" asked Gordon, now filled with fear.
"Yes... they won't release the hostages until they get what they want."
"Done! Harv, you heard them! Get everything the Joker wants! Pronto!!"
Thirty-three minutes and twenty seconds later, Batman, Poison Ivy, a naked
Catwoman, Harley Quinn, Joker, Alex Trebek, eighteen drunken hostages, and a
bunch of weeds were partying to loud music, strippers, and porn films, with tons of
beer at their disposal.
"Batman!! When is the Joker going to release you and the hostages?" asked Gordon
over the phone.
"Uh... tomorrow morning around two... enough time for me to have some fun,"
laughed Batman as he tossed the phone out the window and walked towards the tent
with Poison Ivy.