Boys Vs. Girls

Boys Vs. Girls

bunny chan

'No! It's boring! Get it? B-O-R-I-N-G! Boring!!!' a loud yell echoed through the hallways.

'Well, Evans, if you're such a smart aleck, why don't you get me a better one? Huh?' another voice challenged.

'Cause, Potter, I have such a huge head here-'

'Not to mention a huge ego there,' another voice piped. Immediately, loud bashings were heard.

'Don't you DARE even try, Black-san!' a slightly accented voice shrieked. 'Sakura-chan has her own rights to say what she wants!'

'Shut up! It's time you learn proper English for now!'

'Well Evans? Your head not functioning huh?'

'What?! It IS!!!! I just had the idea and your stupid friend here blew it up!!!'

'Excuses, excuses…'

'Tis not an excuse!!!'

'ENOUGH OF THIS!!' McGonagall yelled, stomping to the foursome in the middle of the hallways.

'Why?' Sirius Black, supreme mischief-maker, asked innocently.

'Yeah! There's a rule for "no magic in the corridors" but there isn't one for yelling in the hallways,' James Potter, Sirius's partner in crime, Mr-I-am-very-perfect or King of Mischiefs, said.

'Yeah,' Lily Evans said. The Queen of Mischief after the legendary James Potter.

'Hai!!!' Kioki Kiseragi, the Japanese girl and partner of Lily Evans, saluted.

'DETENTION! ALL!' McGonagall bellowed.

'Hey Minnie! We didn't do anything!' Sirius defended.

'Nope. Absolutely nothing, right Lily?' James said, putting an arm across the girl's shoulders.

'Yep! James and I are friends, aren't we?' Lily beamed, putting her arm across James' shoulders.

'No doubt! So why de- de- uh, deglention?' Kioki said, stuttering on her English.

'It's detention, Ms Kiseragi. And when are you and Mr Potter friends, Ms Evans?' McGonagall said, lowering an eye on the two arch enemies.

'Oh, long! Right?' Lily said, turning to James.

'Very very long, I must say. Minnie, are you that unobservant or are you just plain blind?' James said.

'Maybe she need her glasses thick!' Kioki suggested.

'Thicken,' Sirius corrected.

'Ah, thicglen.'

McGonagall rolled her eyes upward and left them alone after a few point taken off Gryffindor for shouting in the hallways. As soon as the disappeared from sight, Lily and James let go of each other and shot electricity.

'Yuck! If it weren't to please McGonagall, I wouldn't've done that!' James said disgustedly. Lily merely brush her robes off the dusts and wisely said nothing for her tongue could sometimes run in line with her thoughts.

'Well, if you wanna stay in the plot, Sakura-chan, Potter-san,' Kioki said decidedly.

'Hold on one moment, Japanese bimbo. Why are you calling her "Sakura" suddenly?' Sirius stopped.

'Sakura nicer than Lily, no? And Kioki-chan no Japanese bimbo, arigato. I am Chinese mix Japanese,' Kioki said, flipping her raven hair back haughtily.

'No wonder your English is getting worst and worst,' Sirius said.

'I never signed up for a nickname,' Lily muttered.

'Should've guessed. Sakura, Sakura,' James teased.

'Shuddap! Kioki, get him for me!' Lily said. The girl grinned evilly and start pulling out her wand to cast spells on him. 'No!! Not that! The other, Kioki-chan!'

Getting the message, Kioki kept her wand back and pulled out a long and thick stick which she called a bonbori. Eager with a workout, she chased after James, and Sirius was shouting words of encouragement so that James could avoid the slashing stick.

'Well, don't be too sure, Black-san,' Lily said, grinning evilly. 'You're not safe. Not yet.' With that, Lily started hitting Sirius with a similar bonbori.

'Stop! Stop!!' James pleaded. Kioki kept her bonbori back into the black robes and helped him up.

'I won!' she said victoriously.

'No you hadn't!' James said. With a blink of an eye, Kioki had him on the floor.

'Now I won!'

'Good!! Help meeee!!!!!!' Sirius howled. Lily had landed hard blows on Sirius with the heavy bonbori (How on earth did she carry it? Sirius wondered personally) and Sirius was developing bad bruises as a result.

'Okay, I think I'll spare you for now,' Lily said, wiping the sweat off her forehead.

'Thank you, oh good goddess of – hey! Whacha do that for?' Sirius said when Lily landed a punch on his face.

'Girls aren't that defenseless, just to remind you,' Lily smirked.

'Well, blearh!!! Boys have better brains!' James said, pulling a face at Lily.

'Too bad! Girls are better!' Lily said, also pulling a face. Soon, the face pulling competition started and Lily and James were fighting tooth and nail for victory. Kioki was rolling with laughter at the faces they pull and Sirius was speechless for words. However, the tears rolling down his cheeks proved that he, too, had a nice time with the show their Head students put on.

'Well, boys are way smarter!' James said, sticking out his tongue and making his right eye go up, left go down.

'Girls are way better!' Lily said, doing a horrid face at him.

'STOP!' Kioki demanded. Silence.

'See? Girls are way more commanding!' Lily said to James.

'What?! Sirius, say something!'

'I've got nothing to say,' Sirius said, picking some gum at a nearby window.

'Uh, what's going on here? I leave you four just to get some parchments and you all argue?' Remus said, running towards them.

'See? Remus has a say here!' James said, pulling Remus forward. The boy quickly recoiled and retreat.

'No, I'm not getting into one of your arguments,' Remus said franticly.

'They've been arguing this way,' Sirius said. Kioki just sighed and shrugged at Remus.

*

'-and then poof!! Snape went baboom!' Kioki said excitedly at the table.

'Baboom? Baboon?' Sirius said, confused.

'No, no!! He turned a gogira!' Kioki corrected.

'You mean "gorilla", Kioki,' James said.

'A-hah! And he turn black and had his hair everywhere!' Kioki said.

'Sounds mean, Kio-chan,' Kiaka Kiseragi, Kioki's twin sister, said.

'Iie! Kantan, kantan, Kia-chan!' Kioki said.

'Kantan? One-san -' Kiaki started.

'Stop speaking Japanese, you two! Our translater isn't here!' Remus said.

'Translater? When have we got a translater?' James said, biting his spoon.

'Sakura-chan!' the two chorused together.

'Sakura? Who's "sakura"?' Remus said, confused.

'They mean Lily. Goodness knows why that girl was suddenly nicknamed Sakura,' James muttered.

'Sakura is cherry blossom, Potter-san,' Kioki explained.

'Yeah. You're here to learn speak English, not Japanese,' Sirius said, pointing a spoon at them.

'Aah! Food!! I'm late!' Lily screeched as she burst into the Great Hall and ran to the Gryffindor table. She stared at the remains.

'Oops! Gomen, Sakura-chan!' Kiaki said apologeticly.

'Forget it,' Lily said, gulping a nearby carrot juice. 'I'll just do with these leftovers then.'

'Do with what, Evans? There's only the skin left!' James said, wiping his mouth. Lily turned back to the table and her jaw dropped. True enough, only a little piece of scrap was left.

'Potter! You did it on purpose!' Lily accused.

'Did not! You were the one who woke up late!' James said, pulling a face at her.

'Just cause it's Sunday, why can't I sleep in?' Lily retorted.

'Your fault then! Food's always free for me!' James argued.

'Tisn't!'

'Tis!'

'Not!'

'Is!'

'Not!'

'Is!'

'EVANS, POTTER!!!!!!!'

'Ulp! Uh, it is, James,' Lily gulped.

'No, it isn't, Lily,' James stuttered. Sirius, Remus, Kioki and Kiaki watched them in amazement as they forced a grin at each other.

'Well, it's nice to see the both of you made up,' McGonagall said, walking off. Immediately, the innocent grins dropped and the murderous look appeared once again on their faces.

'It's amazing how you two can put up that way for seven years straight,' Sirius sighed.

'H- hai,' Kioki said, staring at the two Head Students pulling faces at each other.

'Wonder how put it up,' Kiaki said.

'How they put it up, you mean. Ask them,' Remus sighed.

'Anyone would've thought they made up already,' Sirius shrugged.

'Well… they hadn't, as you can see.'

'Does these look like eyes to you?' Sirius asked, pointing at his eyes. Kioki pushed the fingers to those eyes and Sirius yelled loudly in pain.

'Yes…' Remus said.

'Kioki! What did you do that for????' Sirius said, clasping his eyes in pain. Lily and James stopped to look in amusement.

'How do you know it's Kioki?' Kioki asked.

'Kiaki!!!!'

'How do you know it's Kiaki?' Kiaki asked.

'Argh! Any of you! one of you!!!'

'The best thing about having identical twins are that you get to fool people with them,' Lily grinned at James.

'Kioki! Kiaki! Both! Detention!' Sirius yelled.

'What give you the tights?' Kiaki said.

'Rights, rights!' Lily corrected.

'I'm a prefect!! Argh! You two'll pay for this!' Sirius yelled, his eyes now red and watery.

*

'And the competition begins… now!' Dumbledore said. The girls quickly climbed onto the boys' back and the boys started hopping.

A competition between the houses were held in Dumbledore's favor ('He's too bored,' Lily said when she pulled out her partner's name) and the girls were supposed to sit on the boys' back as the boys raced to the finishing the. The winning couple and house wins a mystery prize.

'I still can't believe I paired off with you,' James panted. Lily sat on his back, clinging hardly for dear life because of her fright to sit on unstable, moving things. She was shutting her eyes tightly and was clinging onto James tightly.

'Please, Potter, be quick and be done with it,' Lily yelped, tightening her grip.

'What do you think I am? Superman? I don't go round the Quidditch Pitch, into the Forbidden Forest and circle the castle ten times in just one second,' James huffed.

'Do keep quiet!' Lily begged. 'I'm not in a mood to play fight right now! Be quick!'

'With you weighing like an elephant, I doubt it,' James muttered as he waited for a wham in his head. When none came, he looked up slowly.

'Quick, quick, quick,' Lily was mumbling as she clung really tightly onto him.

'H- help… c- c- can't b- breathe,' James choked. Lily soften her grip, but stil clung tightly onto him.

'Hayai! Hayai! Hayai! Hayai!' Kioki chanted as she sat behind Sirius.

'Shut up, Japanese bimbo! There's no use in saying that cause I can't understand a single thing!' Sirius turned around to scold her.

'Kyaaa!!!!' Kioki yelled as they clashed into a tree. 'Baka!'

'What?' Sirius said blankly before getting a nose-bleed for banging so violently into the tree. Kioki magicked a pail and sat Sirius before it.

'Baka! Don't turn! See?' Kioki scolded.

'What's baka, idiot?' Sirius asked.

'Baka!'

'Idiot…'

Back to Lily and James…

'Can you please hurry?' Lily begged, burying her face on James' shoulder.

'I want the prize, so d'you think I wanna hurry?' James said, running. 'If only they let us ride on the broom… I agree, Evans. Dumbledore is way too bored.'

'Good. Quick!! I wanna get off quick!!' Lily urged.

'Yeah, whatever. Hey look! Someone hit a tree!' James said.

'Who?' Lily said, still not tearing her eyes from it's hidden place.

'It's Sirius! And Kioki!!' James laughed.

'Oh, good. Now we seen an accident, we're definitely going bad luck!' Lily moaned.

'Who says so?'

'I don't know. Luck? Hurry!!'

'Yeah. If I'm on a broom, that is,' James muttered.

'Accio broom!' Lily called, pulling out her wand. With a long swish and a zip, a broom landed next to them.

'Are you sure? Cause-'

'Dumbledore didn't say anything about not to break any rules. Get on!' Lily said. James got onto the broom and Lily climbed on after him.

'Did he even say anything about rules?' James asked before they flew off.

'No!' Lily cried.

Dumbledore looked at the couple on the broom and squinted his eyes to see who's on it.

'Ah! Some students had the sense to use their brains!' Dumbledore smiled at them.

'That's cheating!' Pratoise, the Slytherin house teacher, hissed.

'No it's not! Dumbledore didn't say anything about not allowed to break rules!' McGonagall said. 'This is not school rules, Pratoise!'

'Exactly! And I don't recall even mentioning about rules for the game except that you have to go round the Quidditch Pitch, into the Forbidden Forest and circle the castle ten times,' Dumbledore winked.

Pratoise stood, dumbfounded.

'The broom's way easier!' Lily said, holding onto James tightly.

'Way, way easier. Can't you fly?' James said. 'You could just call another broom, y'know.'

'I can't fly a broom.'

'Why not? Too stupid, Lily?'

'No! I'm afraid of heights,' Lily said, tightening her grip.

'I- I can't b- b- breathe, L- Lily!' James choked.

'Gomen nasai,' Lily said.

'No! Not Japanese again! And you have a death grip there. Don't kill me next time,' James said, skillfully guiding the broom to a landing before the headmaster.

'We're here!' he announced. Lily quickly climbed down the broom and dusted herself shakily.

'Congratulations, James and Lily!' Dumbledore said happily. 'Smart to think of this!'

'Twas Lily,' James said, pointing at Lily. She was sitting on the ground, her arms protecting her knees as she looked up at them.

'What? I need to stay closer to the ground! Why? What crime is that?' Lily said automatically.

'No crime, no crime,' Dumbledore laughed. 'I take it you have a thing for heights?'

'Really huge.'

'She choked me twice,' James said. 'Anyway, what's the prize?'

'Free food at Hogsmeade for the rest of the year and a hundred galleons each to the winning couple!' Dumbledore announced.

'Good! I'm awfully starving now!' Lily said, stretching up. 'Where's Kioki and Kiaki?'

'Oh, they are still racing.' The two stared.

'And you're gonna let them race until they completed all ten rounds?' James gaped.

'A bit torturous, professor,' Sprout said.

'It is? Well, time to call them back! Accio students!' Dumbledore called, waving his wand.

'Boy, am I glad we were first! I don't want to be dragged over by the summoning charm,' James whispered to Lily. Lily nodded her agreement. The whole school was, as James described, dragged to the starting point.

'Sakura-chan!' Kioki said, running towards Lily.

'For the last time, Kioki, I am NOT Sakura!' Lily said exasperatedly.

'Sakura-chan!' Kiaki called, running to the two of them.

'You too, Kiaki!' Lily said, frowning at the other girl.

'How'd you know who's who? I'm Kiaki and she's Kioki!' Kioki said to Lily.

'Wrong. You're Kioki and she's Kiaki. I know you two,' Lily said to the two of them. The twins pouted.

'Hey!!! Who won?' Sirius called, running over.

'Us,' James said.

'Us who?'

'Us, us.'

'Us, us who?'

'Us, us, us!'

'Who's "us"?????'

'Me!'

'That's "I" then.'

'No! Me and Lily!'

Sirius perked up.

'You two settled?'

'Settle what?'

'Who's "us" again?'

'Me and Lily. Or Lily and me, whichever it is,' James said.

'Lily?' Sirius said.

'Lily,' James confirmed.

'Okay. Professor, you should've organized this seven years ago!' Sirius said to Dumbledore.

'And why, may I ask?' Dumbledore said with a twinkle in his eyes.

'James and Lily actually got together!'

'And when do we not?' Lily said.

'We've been friends for long, hadn't we?' James said.

'Right!' The two linked their hands to confirm that.

'See? They got together! And for all you know, they love each other now!' Sirius said.

'Oh, and what's your proof?' Lily challenged.

'None.'

'See?' James said.

'Sa- eh, Lily-chan, Kio-chan and Kia-chan dare you do something!' Kioki said, a glint in her eyes.

'What?'

'We dare you two to see who kisses better. Boy or girl,' Kiaki grinned.

'Alright. That's set then!' James said, kissing Lily.

'No way am I losing out!' Lily said, kissing James.

'I must say, for a Japanese bimbo, you two sure are smart,' Sirius said to the two girls. They merely smirked at him.

'So the result?' Remus said.

'Girl!' Lily said at once.

'It's boy!' James said at once. The two looked at each other.

'Okay, both.'

'See how smart us girls are?' Kioki smirked.

'Even is Lily and James' problems are solved, boys still win!' Sirius argued, not going to let the old argument die.

'Who came up with this brilliant plan?' Kiaki said.

'Yeah! And there's no way you boys can live without us girls!' Kioki said.

'Your mom wouldn't feed you,' Kiaki said evilly. Sirius gulped.

'Okay, you win,' Sirius said at last. Food is always his weakness and he truly liked his mom's food more than anything.

'No. I think both sides win,' Remus grinned. 'Girls can't go without boys and boys can't go without girls!'

'Hai!' the two chorused.

AN: Welcome back Kioki!!! And hello Kiaki! I got bored and this little image of Kioki in my mind somehow forced me to add her in this short story. Out of nowhere, this twin Kiaki turned up and also threatened to disrupt my already untidy head if I don't include her in. Hopefully this turned out well, cause I simply couldn't bother with re-reading it all over. And as for my problems with the title, I can't say that it didn't attack again this time… and thanks, if you want to point out that this one's stupid. I personally think so, too.