What has happened thus far: Ukyo's hired a new frycook. Cologne is
irritated by Jerms the Salesman, Shampoo is running out to meet Ranma, who
is acting arrogant. And Dark Jerms interrupted to kill Shampoo briefly
before I got back control of the story.

Ryouga wandered aimlessly in some town, as usual, his thoughts also
wandering aimlessly, also as usual. He started thinking about what he had
last eaten, a tasty sandwich with several exotic ingredients. It was too bad
Akane had so much trouble with cooking, but Ranma still shouldn't always be
so inconsiderate and mean after she had tries so hard. Ranma! What a fool!
What does Akane see in him anyway? Ryouga growled.

"I wish I could destroy Ranma's hold over her. She deserves so much
better than that bumbling fool!" Like a reflex, Ryouga reached for his heart
pendant, but stopped, just as usual, as he realized that of course it wasn't
there.

He had, as per the title, left his heart in Jusenkyo. Yet another thing
to blame the vile Saotome for! He had been given the heart by a girl whose
life he had saved, and it had kept him from getting lost so frequently.

Until he lost it after falling into that cursed Jusenkyo pond! Ryouga
gritted his teeth and clenched his fists. That wretch! How could Ranma ever
understand his pain? Throwing back his head, he let out a feral roar.

"SAOTOME!"

Ukyo breathed in deeply.

"Ok, girl, calm down." Then she looked up again.

"Aiee!" She stopped and caught her breath. Where Duro had stood, there
was now what looked like a huge hairy man covered in ice. She picked up the
now cracked bottle and looked at it again.

"Jusinko, Jusinko. Where have I heard that name before?" She snapped her
fingers. "Of course! Not Jusinko, Jusenkyo! That means that this water must
be from there! Oh, poor Duro. He has no idea what he's in for." She shook
herself. "Well, in that case, hot water will turn him back!" She ran over to
the kitchen and grabbed the teapot. Leaping over a table, she checked to
make sure the water was boiling, and tossed it at the icycled man.

Nothing happened.

A chill ran down Ukyo's spine. "Ok, I gotta get help. Ranma will know
what to do!" She checked her clothes, grabbed the bottle, and ran off.

Shampoo raced down the road, humming a merry tune. "Ranma airen, airen

Ranma, Wo de airen, Ranma, Ranma, ya ya ya ya ya ya OOF!" Shampoo fell into
someone's arms knocking them both to the floor.

"Why could this be my fair Akane or the pig-tailed girl rushing to
embrace me, the Blue Thunder? Oh happy day?" Shampoo pushed Kuno forcefully,
getting to her feet. The kendoist's expression instantly became one of
disgust. "Oh I see, it is you, that vile Chinese gaijin. You are not worth
the Blue Thunder's time." Kuno turned his back with a sneer to a smoldering
Shampoo.

((Intellectual Jerms: Say here's a thought? Is her name really Shampoo? Or
is it Xian Pu? This merits analysis.

Jerms: No it doesn't. Let me get back to the story.

Macho Jerms: Hey guys, what's up?

Jerms: Not now.

Intelligent Jerms: We are about to embark on an exciting intellectual
exploration of analysis of Shampoo's real name.

Macho Jerms: (flexing) Cool, dudes.

Jerms: (flustered) No we're not.

Intellectual Jerms: Oh how plebian.

Jerms: Shut up you troglodyte!

Intellectual Jerms: Uno momento, por favor senor. I am no troglodyte! I
don't believe you even know what that means!

Jerms: Of course I do, it means...

Stupid Jerms: Duh...Troglodit? Isn't that a monster or something?

Intellectual Jerms: Not exactly. Although it is the name of a monster who
dwells in caves, it also means one who lives primitively, which I certain do
not do!

Stupid Jerms: Primi-what?

Intellectual Jerms: (sighing) Never mind.

Jerms: ANYWAY, let's get back to what we were doing, ok?

Intellectual Jerms: Right, which is the subject of Shampoo's name. Now,
Zhan means to stand, and Xian means salty. Pu is not a word. My point? Only
that Xian Pu is no more "Chinese" than "Shan Pu" because Chinese people
don't always name their kids after words. In fact, just like in English, the
names often mean nothing. Like the name oh I don't know, Jerms, for
example. pure gibberish.

Jerms: Wait a minute. That name does mean something. It comes from
Jeremiah, the prophet.

IJ: Which means?

Jerms: Uh... Ok, so I don't know. That doesn't mean it's gibberish.

IJ: (smiling) Well, my work is done here. Shalom! Ciao!

Macho Jerms: Later, dude.

Stupid Jerms: (scratching head) Hold on a sec, I don't get it. What's my
name mean?

Jerms: ::sigh:: Never mind. Well, now that he's gone, let's get back to
that brilliant repartee between Kuno and Shampoo.
))

Kuno snorted. "What a sniveling countenance! You peasants are nothing
compared with the might of Tatewaki Kuno.

Shampoo boiled. "Aiya! You foolish, Stupid Boy! Shampoo Kill YOU!" She
slipped into Mandarin, so angry. "Houji! Bendan!" Kuno yawned. Shampoo
jumped him.

Ranma was practicing when he received the call.

"Lunch is ready!" Ranma sped into the house, knocking down Soun as he
went. He leapt over his father and landed next to the table. He began
shoveling food into his mouth at a an amazing rate, grabbing everything he
could stuff in his mouth.

Kasumi looked at Ranma and frowned briefly before cheering up. "Well,
Ranma, I'm glad you're enjoying Akane's dish too."

Ranma jerked up and coughed. "Wha?" The combination proved too much for
his throat, and he started choking.

Akane snorted. "Baka. Don't expect any help from me."

Nabiki smirked. "Well, Ranma, I might be willing to help you out . . .
for a modest fee."

Genma and Soun looked at each other knowingly and chorused. "It's a
martial artist's duty to endure pain and suffering for the cause."

Kasumi was busy putting out a fire in the kitchen.

Ukyo dashed down the street as fast as she could. She could see what

looked like Kuno and Shampoo wrestling on the street. The okonomiyaki chef
shook herself. She couldn't allow herself to be distracted. She needed to
get help for Duro, and Ranma was the only one who could help.

Ukyo began running so fast she had to close her eyes to block the wind.
Breathing heavily, she muttered to herself. "Almost there." Suddenly, she
slammed into something. She feel to the ground, the wind knocked out of her.

Once she opened her eyes, she saw who she had knocked over. A
well-dressed man and woman were slowly picking themselves up.

Ukyo winced. "Listen, sir and ma'am, I'm really, really sorry. It's
completely my fault. I should have been keeping my eyes on the road. Listen,
how about this? I run a small okonomiyaki place down the road. Please feel
free to come in anytime for a meal on the house."

The woman smiled at her and picked up one of the two briefcases lying on
the ground. "That's okay young lady. We're fine. But maybe we will visit
that restaurant of yours later."

Ukyo looked pensive. "Are you sure? If your clothes are ruined, I'll
find a way to pay for them."

The man shook his head and smiled slightly. "Don't worry. We'll be just
great. It looked like you were in a hurry, so you better skeedaddle."

Ukyo grinned brilliantly at the two adults. "Thanks a lot. Really." With
a quick bow, she dusted herself off and began running at top speed, but
making sure to keep her eyes open wide enough to actually see the road.

The man sighed and picked up the other briefcase. "As I was saying, I
have to get the word back to my superiors. This time I promise, they'll
listen."

The woman put on a dark expression. "They better."

The man gulped.

~J(Well here's an afternote: Thanks for reading thus far. Questions?
Comments? Flames? Etcetera? Direct them directly at the department of
redundancy department. Toodles, and look for the next Chapter soon..
Whoops. Better get rid of that extra period. Ah whatever, I'm too lazy to
press delete.)J~