| Title: Misere Mani Synopsis: Buffy slowly copes with her loss and make crucial decisions that could change her life. Chapter 2 of 'The Bloody', Buffy & Spike fiction. Note: I write immediately after an episode airs. I don't read spoilers nor early bird reviews so all my post-episode fictions are pure speculations :) Rating: PG Date Written: Tuesday, 27 February, 2001 : 10:35:07 PM Author: The Resident Web Vampyr © 2001. Credits: Buffy the Vampire Slayer is a property by Joss Whedon and the powers that be. Characters in play: Buffy Dawn Spike continuation of The Bloody part three. It was the day after the funeral. Giles, Willow, and Xander had volunteered to spend the night at Buffy's house to make sure she and Dawn were alright. Buffy graciously declined. She wasn't sure exactly why, all she knew was that she wanted to spend time alone. Ever since the funeral, Buffy hadn't uttered any words; she remained silent and seemed to be lost. Giles was worried and insisted that he stay until everything was back to normal. *** Buffy stood in her mother's room. She was more affected by Joyce's death simply because in the back of her mind she knew Dawn wasn't real. She was all alone in the world, an orphan in every sense. An absent father, a sister who's not human, friends who have their own lives, a Watcher wrapped up in his business, an ex-boyfriend who's incommunicado, and a lost love buried in his own struggle. "Angel...?" Buffy whispered. Slowly, a tear ran down her cheek. No ties to the world that she had was supposed to protect. What was left of her existence? Buffy wiped her tears with the back of her hand. She walked inside her mother's walk-in closet and lightly ran her fingers along her mom's clothes. A familiar black dress caught her eye. It had a blue and green floral design staggered across the center. It was the same dress that Joyce had worn for a date recently. Buffy gently held the dress and slowly pressed it against her face and inhaled its scent. Buffy could still smell her, she could still remember her embrace, she could still remember her kisses. Buffy laid down on her mother's bed, still clinging to the black dress. She softly caressed a pillow, her mother's pillow. She imagined how every night this pillow cradled her mother's head, comforted her. Buffy's thoughts rushed forward on what would happen now with her, with Dawn. "Buffy?" Dawn entered the room, a bit uncomfortable seeing her sister crouched their mother's bed. Buffy sat up and patted the side of the bed, gesturing for her sister to sit down beside her. Dawn approached her timidly. "Dawn," said Buffy. "I've been thinking, about mom, about you, and what happens next." Dawn listened. "I made some decisions," Buffy sighed. "I've decided to quit school," she said in a sorrowful tone. For a few moments there was complete silence. Dawn didn't say anything but her heart shrank as she held back tears. "I decided to look for work full-time, so that I, w-we could pay up this house, the bills, a-and your school..." "Buffy..." She didn't allow Dawn to finish, "A-And, you know what? I could concentrate more into slaying and stuff. And I'll be 100% focused in protecting you," said Buffy, collecting herself amidst her trepidation. *** Buffy let out a faint whimper, tears building in her eyes. This was the picture she had in her mind for how she would tell Dawn about her plans. It's for the best, she thought. She curled up once more in her Joyce's bed. What about dad? What about him? He's never there when I needed him. It was always Giles. Giles the Watcher, Giles the friend, Giles the father figure. My dad? All I know is he's somewhere in Spain. Anyways, it's too late for him to be a part of our lives. Buffy slowly closed her eyes. *** Buffy felt the grass beneath her hands. She could tell that it was recently placed there after the burial. It's still moist under the wet ground. Buffy also noticed some fresh flowers at her mother's gravestone. There was no indication of where or who they were from. She had been lying on her mother's grave for a few minutes now, thinking back to when Joyce was still alive. Buffy smiled at the random memories that came back to her. Everything was at standstill, the silence was deafening yet it didn't seem to bother her. Buffy was aware that there was no other place she'd rather be at the moment, she felt her eyes getting heavy, and she started to blink. Once, twice. She thought she saw two sets of heavy boots in front of her. part four. His hand pressed flat against the glass window outside the bedroom from where Buffy was. Spike had let a day pass without trying to speak to her. He witnessed Buffy's grieving and he couldn't stand seeing her like this. He felt compelled to be there for her, it didn't matter if she rejected him for the nth time. What mattered right now is her. Spike suddenly found his voice. *** "Buffy..." Dawn entered the room, a bit uncomfortable seeing Buffy crouched in their mother's bed. Buffy sat up and patted the side of the bed, gesturing for her sister to sit down beside her. Dawn approached her timidly. "Dawn," said Buffy. "I've been thinking, about mom, about you, and what happens next." Dawn started crying. "Buffy, why is this happening..?" For a few seconds, there was complete silence. Buffy finally said, "I don't know..." *** |
Also by The Resident Web Vampyr Against One, Stronger than Desire, Sweetness Follows, Glorious, No More, An Ode to Spike and Buffy, Checkpoint, Blood Lies, Crushed/I was made to crush you, I was made to love you too, The Bloody.