Disclaimer: Still the same junk.
Dan: (Is lying in hospital bed, completely wrapped in bandages, and with an IV stand pumping fluids into him) After last weeks disastorous fall, I'm slowly recovering. (Moans loudly)
Dan: Oooh, here's our next guest, Grog!
Grog: (Mumbles something unintelligible)
Dan: This guest looks quite safe.
Grog: I hate you!
Dan: Ooooooook....
Grog: I'm depressed.
Dan: First question, describe how you met Link.
Grog: You're fat and old.
Dan: Hey!
Grog: Link was ugly.
Dan: Huh?
Grog: The world stinks!
Dan: Describe how you met Link.
Grog: I stil hate you!
Dan: Next question then, where'd you get the Bunny Hood?
Grog: Found it.
Dan: Where?
Grog: That's a toupee! (Rips it off Dan's head)
Dan: Give that back, I've already interviewed one thief! (Sighs when Grog eats it)
Grog: It tasted bad!
Dan: Where'd you find the Bunny Hood?
Grog: On the ground.
Dan: Where?
Grog: On the ground.
Dan: WHERE?
Grog: ON THE GROUND!
Dan: Where was it?
Grog: ON THE DARN GROUND!
Dan: Was it at the beach?
Grog: No.
Dan: Canyon?
Grog: No, you ugly noodle.
Dan: Mountains.
Grog: No.
Dan: City, swamp, ranch, field?
Grog: No.
Dan: Where'd you find it then?
Grog: I will use my dark magic to punish you!!!!!!
Dan: (Looks up, a ghostly image in a cloud is there) That's Bob Barker playing the organ with his pet elephant!
Grog: I summon you!
Dan: AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!
Bob Barker, Organ, and Pee-Wee the 25-ton elephant: (Crashes out of sky, slams into already injured Dan, completely demolishing the bed.)
Bob: Goodness gracious, I almost hurt Pee-Wee! (Begins to whack Dan Rather with the organ)
Grog: Return home! (Bob, organ, and Pee-Wee vanish)
Dan: Oooooooooooohhhhhhhhhh, morphine, tylenol, excedrin, aspirin, advil, ibuprofen, bayer, somebody give me something!
Grog: (Sees crew member approaching) Muhaha! (Blasts Crew Member, turning him into a can of French Onion dip.)
Crew Member: I'm tasty!
Grog: (Summons a Hyrulean Bag O' Chips, eats it with the Crew Member)
Crew Member: Thanks for sharing your chips, they were quite tasty.
Dan: Help me!
Grog: You're welcome, shut up you! (Summons a 1000000000000000 ton weight which hovers over Dan)
Dan: Nooooooooooo! (Weight crushes him)
Grog: Want some more chips?
Crew Member: ummmmmmmmm....... see you next week folks,
er....... well maybe at least?