Chapter
Two:
"Li-kun! I can't believe it's you!
How are you doing?" Daidouji Tomoyo exclaimed, deep purple eyes shining happily
upon recognizing the voice on the other line. The day had started to drag for
some odd reason, too much work in a small amount of time. And it was always the
same.
"I'm fine, Daidouji-san. Yourself?"
he asked her politely, playing with the satin sheets of his bed. Morning light
filtered in mistily through snow-white curtains and he glanced over from his
spot seated on the edge of the bed to Meilin, who was still asleep under the
covers. He smiled gently, reaching out to push away several strands of hair
that had settled across her smooth cheek.
"So polite, Syaoran." Tomoyo scolded
good-naturedly, using his name comfortably. "But I'm fine. And Meilin-chan?"
Syaoran nodded, finally rising off
the bed carefully so as not to disturb his sleeping wife. "She's good. Still
sleeping actually." He answered.
Tomoyo hesitated on the line.
"You've been awake for a while, haven't you." She asked but it came out
sounding more like a statement. She knew him only too well now and whenever she
could she clucked over him like his mother.
He found himself quite enjoying it.
Meilin did it often and Sakura…Sakura had done it always. But it was good to
have a new person worry. He exhaled, stepping out of the bedroom and closing
the door behind himself. The long hallway stretched out before him and he
floated down the length absentmindedly. "I haven't slept." He corrected her.
"I…needed to hear your voice."
To be reminded once more…
"My voice?" Tomoyo repeated,
mischievous once more. "Make sure Meilin isn't hearing you. She's a tricky one.
The last thing I want to hear is her once again claiming ownership of you."
She didn't add that it was actually
the first thing she wanted to hear. Because maybe, just maybe, it would feel as
it had so many years ago. It would have some semblance to it.
It would feel as if Sakura still
lived.
"So, what happened?" Tomoyo asked,
seriousness clouding her voice. "It would usually take Meilin screaming your
ear off for you to call."
Syaoran chuckled to himself, pausing
outside the glass doors of his balcony. Down below he heard movement, maids
preparing breakfast. Wei-san speaking quietly to his mother about preparations.
He closed his mind to it, pulling open one of the glass doors and allowing the
morning air to wake him from his dreariness. "I had a small talk with Meilin
last night. Just the usual. I don't listen. I don't love her. Why don't I let
her cook more often…" he shrugged.
Tomoyo burst out laughing in his ear
and he basked in the warmth that she brought, the familiarity that it induced,
and he almost expected to hear another feminine laugh with hers, one just as
carefree but the slightest bit huskier with age.
Tomoyo, how long has it been
since you laughed so freely?
He wondered about it once more,
feeling himself slip low again.
"Has she forgotten what happened at
your own wedding?" Tomoyo was asking, still giggling.
"If she has, I haven't." he replied.
And he finally stepped out onto the balcony. The morning was glorious, a gentle
wind playing with his auburn locks. "But then, she made me realize something…"
"That her voice can shatter glass?"
Syaoran swallowed, wishing he could
partake of the humor. But he didn't feel anything at the moment. "That she
loved me." He said softly. "That no matter how much I loved Sakura, she'd
always love me just as much."
Tomoyo had fallen silent, all jokes
gone. And there was the slightest hesitation before she asked, "What are you
saying, Syaoran?"
Syaoran gazed out over his property,
the large garden of blooming roses and cherry blossom trees. Everywhere he went
he saw her, was reminded of her. He was becoming fearful. "I don't know what
I'm saying, Tomoyo. My life is a blur and yet…" he exhaled shakily, "It goes by
so slow…"
On the other line Tomoyo was quiet,
her silence sorrowful.
"I need to get her out of my head.
Because…" he shook his head, feeling something painful deep inside. "I can't
live like this. I hurt everyone around me and I can't help it, feeling this
way."
Tomoyo nodded on her side,
scratching her nail into the glass table her phone set sat on. "I think…you
can't lay your demons to rest." She murmured into the receiver, long dark hair
falling down both sides of her face.
"I need to know, Tomoyo. I need to
know what happened to her. I need to know who has the cards." He stopped short
suddenly, staring out into nothing and he almost couldn't say it, almost
couldn't finish. "I need…a body to bury…"
There was silence on the phone and
then Tomoyo whispered, "Syaoran…"
Syaoran stared for another moment
and then he blinked, the world around him coming into focus once more. He bowed
his head, fingertips running across the white stone of the balcony. "My one
year anniversary is coming up, Tomoyo." He said quietly.
"I know," came her voice faintly. "I
already got you a gift…"
Syaoran smiled, a small bit of
warmth coming back. "Arigato, Tomoyo-san. But I'm actually planning a small
get-together. And I want you to come." He said. And he added quickly, "I'll pay
your way and you'll be staying here for the time."
Tomoyo's smile was evident in her
tone. "I'll pay my own way. But if Meilin cooks, all bets are off." She said,
sounding as haughty as possible but still radiating sweetness.
Syaoran nodded. "Deal. It's in a
week. I'll call you again later today with the details."
"Great."
Syaoran turned away from the balcony
before suddenly remembering. "Oh, and one more thing, Tomoyo-san." He said
quickly. "Can you invite…" and he broke off uncertainly.
Tomoyo paused before supplying the
name. "Eriol?" she asked. "Of course. I'll get in contact with him."
Syaoran felt a strange lightening
off his shoulders. "Arigato, Tomoyo."
Eriol lifted his head from the
stove, steam rising from the pot of white rice he boiled. Something was coming,
about to happen, and he blinked, wiping at his brow.
The phone rang and he looked at it,
frowning. Somehow he knew who it was going to be. He didn't know how but he
knew and he didn't know what to do for a moment. Then all common sense returned
and he threw down his dishrag and scooped up the phone. "Hello?"
There was the slightest pause before
a soft voice came through. "Eriol?"
Eriol blinked, his beating heart
thumping almost audibly. "Tomoyo." He said her name quietly and he bowed his
head, inhaling.
"Hai." Came the response. "How are
you?"
Miserable. Old.
"I'm…I'm fine." He answered and he
cleared his throat. "Yourself?"
There was awkwardness between them,
he felt it like static and he wondered if she felt it too. "I'm good." She
replied after a small pause. "I just called to say that Syaoran is having a
get-together. His anniversary is coming up."
"In a week, yes." Eriol nodded.
"Right." Tomoyo answered. "Well, he
asked me to invite you." She said. "I'll be going and…" she broke off, inhaling
into the receiver. "I wouldn't mind seeing you there."
Eriol smiled slowly, eyes moving
toward the rice. "I need a few directions on getting there." He joked quietly.
"Once I have them so will you."
Tomoyo said quickly.
Eriol nodded. "Sounds good, then."
He said. And he asked, "Should I think about bringing Nakuru and Spinel Sun?"
Tomoyo became thoughtful. "I think
you should definitely consider it. I'm under the impression Syaoran wants to
feel…like he did in the past. He wants one more memory, maybe…"
Eriol wandered over to the stove,
fingers lifting to touch the knobs. "What do you want, Tomoyo?" he asked
softly, his gaze unseeing. In his mind he saw her, guessed as to what she was
doing while they spoke. Perhaps she was lying down in bed, staring at her
ceiling. Or maybe she was outside in her own little garden, wearing a long,
pale dress.
"It doesn't matter what I want." She
whispered. "I want what-"
"It does matter." He cut her
off. "It matters to me. It matters because you have to stop thinking about
everyone else, what everyone else needs. When Sakura lived it was all about
her-"
"Don't do this again, Eriol-" she
began, pain in her voice.
"Don't worry about everyone else,
Tomoyo. For once, let someone worry about you." He hesitated. "Let me
worry for you."
"I have to go now-" she said softly
and he felt it, felt that she was pulling away.
"No, Tomoyo, wait." He said, needing
to reach her, just once. Just get through to her that Sakura was dead and that
if anyone needed the most comfort out of all of them it was her, because she
hadn't grieved. Since the beginning she had been the mother of the group,
comforting Xiao Lang, reassuring Meilin when they had married. Pushing Eriol
away. He knew what she thought. If Sakura couldn't be happy then she herself
didn't deserve to be happy.
"As long as the one I love is
happy it will be enough for me…"
"I'll call you again with the
details when Syaoran tells me. Please bring Nakuru and Suppi-chan." She was
saying and she was a second away from hanging up, he heard it.
"Tomoyo-"
She inhaled, and it was almost as if
he felt her trembling through the phone. Or maybe his heart felt it over the
distance. "I miss you…" she whispered sadly and then there was a small click
and the dial tone sounded.
Eriol stood frozen, receiver pressed
to his ear. And then he closed his eyes, lips tightening, and clicked off the
phone.
Nakuru's voice came gently from the
doorway of the kitchen. "Eriol…"
He didn't bother looking her way,
putting down the phone slowly. Instead he returned to the rice and smiled
humorlessly. "I'll be done soon so we can eat." He said quietly, gaze unseeing
and blurring the slightest bit.
How shameful…
From behind he heard Nakuru come
close and then her arms wrapped around his waist, her head coming to rest on
his back. And he didn't need her to say anything to reassure him. For the first
time in a long time he realized he wanted to be held. He exhaled against her
arms and then lifted one hand to grasp hers, swallowing.
At the gathering he would let Tomoyo
know and he would set things right.