This conversation between Yukino and Kano is based partly on comments
and criticisms I had with the prereaders of "Les perce-neiges de
février/The Snowdrops of February." It was originally supposed to be
part of that story, but I decided to remove it, mostly because it was
so long as to be anti-climactic. I haven't the heart to let it pass
into oblivion, though, and it fortunately was reasonably self-
contained, so I thought I'd share it with you anyway.
Comments are welcome.
Paul Corrigan
corrig11@pilot.msu.edu
(June 16, 2001: Developments in recent installments of the manga
have led to some minor editing, mainly a cut of a passage (regarding
Tsubasa and her stepmom) that is inconsistent with canon and inessential
to the discussion; it was originally a set-up for another fic that
I planned to write but probably never will now; turns out Masami Tsuda
is resolving the Tsubasa/Kazuma situation quite nicely without my help.
For more details go read the translations at karekano.isgreat.net.
The small mistakes I can correct, but the big ones will have to stay.
^_^; )
--
À coeur ouvert/With Open Hearts
--
A side story to "Les perce-neiges de février/The Snowdrops of February"
by Paul Corrigan
--
_Karekano_ concept devised by Masami Tsuda
[Shot of the wall of the Miyazawa girl's bedroom. On the wall, visible
in the dim light, are two posters side by side.
On the left is a print of a drawing of the face of Ayn Rand,
presumably Yukino's.
On the right is a poster, presumably Kano's, of Nanami Kiryu from
_Utena_ (or rather SAGN), in her blue and white Fillette québécoise
outfit, kneeling down beside an apprehensive Mitsuru Tsuwabuki, himself
dressed as the Marié du lis--the Lily Groom--and clad in a similar blue
uniform. Nanami guards Tsuwabuki under one arm and brandishes a sword
in the other. Underneath the picture of Nanami and Tsuwabuki are mug
shots of the other characters in the series, including one of Castor
the beaver, Nanami's animal mascot (in lieu of Chuchu the monkey-mouse
from _Utena_, there being no monkeys native to Quebec).]
Yukino: [off] Kano, tell me...
Kano: [off] What?
Yukino: [off] Why do you think Tsukino wants to go to Hokuei so bad?
Kano: [off] I dunno. [beat] Why? Don't you think that's a good idea?
Yukino: [off] I don't know if it is or not. I mean...I don't want her
to go just because I did.
Kano: [off; reassuring] You know, it is kind of one of the best schools
around here. If she can get in, why not? Why shouldn't she go? [beat;
with more levity] 'Sides, you can tell her which teachers to beware...!
Yukino: [off] No...no...I mean...I don't want either of you guys trying
to do what I did, just because I did. You know? [beat; more softly] I
mean, you could have gotten really hurt trying to do that.
Kano: [off; a bit dismissively] You know, it's not really the same
thing...
Yukino: [off] You don't know. It could be this today and that tomorrow.
[nervously] I _really_ don't want to go through this again...
Kano: [off] Yeah, really. [beat] So tell her so.
Yukino: [off] But how? I mean, it's easy for me to say, "Don't feel
pressured to get into Hokuei, you can go to school in Timbuktu for all
I care..."
Kano: [off; creepily] As long as Mom and Dad pay for it...
Yukino: [off; tittering] Yeah, as long as they pay for it! [beat; more
seriously] But I can't make her _not_ feel pressured, can I?
[thoughtful] I'm sorely tempted to burn that junior high photo of me
after all.
Kano: [off; shocked] No! Don't, Sis! Mom'll kill you!
Yukino: [off] Okay, I won't. [beat; lighter] What say I just draw
glasses and a mustache on the photo instead?
Kano: [off; tittering] Now that would be funny...[completely serious]
...but Mom'd still kill you.
[A sweatdrop might appear on the brow of the drawing of Ayn Rand.]
Yukino: [off; thinking better of it] Yeah, I guess she would. [beat;
end sweatdrop on Ayn Rand] Probably I should just ask her to take it
down.
Kano: [off; curious] What's wrong with that picture anyway? You look
real nice in it, you know...
Yukino: [off] Yeah, that's kind of the problem. Look...the girl in that
picture was a real bitch, okay? We both know that. I'm not proud of
what I was like back then. [beat] So I can't stop Tsukino doing what
she wants to do, but I don't want her to feel pressured because she
thinks that girl's looking over her shoulder. So I guess I just don't
want that girl staring into the back of Tsukino's neck any more. Or
yours, come to think of it.
[Close up on the poster of Nanami.]
Kano: [off; more to herself] Shoot the black dog.
[Close up on the poster of Ayn Rand, which has sprouted an arched
eyebrow.]
Yukino: [off; confused] Huh?
[Close up on the face of Nanami.]
Kano: [off; aloud] From a story I heard once. "The Storyteller's Black
Dog." It's a folktale from French Canada.
[Close up on the face of Ayn Rand.]
Yukino: [off; curious] So where'd you get it? _Nanami_?
[Close up on the apprehensive face of Tsuwabuki.]
Kano: [off; sighing dramatically] You know, sis, it just struck me that
there's a whole generation of Japanese for whom their only experience
of Québécois culture is second-hand through the warped perspective of
_Sovereignty-Associationist Girl Nanami_. [pretending to sob] It's so
terrible...!
[Close up on the face of Ayn Rand, which is now sweatdropping again.]
Yukino: [off; a bit embarrassed] Oh. Okay. Guess that's a no. Shows
what I know, I guess...
[Close up on the mug shot of Miki Kaoru from _Utena_ (or his SAGN
analogue) on the Nanami poster.]
Kano: [off] Seriously? The city library had a book of French Canadian
folk tales lying around, so I checked it out one time and read it from
cover to cover. [beat; getting into her subject] What? To truly
understand _Nanami_ you need to put it in its cultural context, which
requires research...
[Close up on the face of Ayn Rand, which has stopped sweatdropping.]
Yukino: [off] I'm sorry. Learning's always been a means to an end for
me, I guess. [beat; thoughtful] I mean, you've probably learned more
stuff just for fun than I'll ever know. I really don't know much of
anything outside what I've crammed into my head for tests. I don't
think I ever learned anything just for fun. [beat] So what's the story
about?
[Close up on the mug shot of Castor the beaver.]
Kano: [off] 'k. This farmer's scared of burglars, right? But he doesn't
want to buy a guard dog. Turns out this guy's the best storyteller in
the village, so he tells everyone this story about his big black dog
and how fearsome it is, and he tells it so well that everybody believes
him and nobody robs him. Which is fine, until one day some guy comes
along and his hand's bleeding, and he's like, "Your dog bit me! What
are you going to do about it?" And the farmer's like, "No, he didn't,
you moron." And the guy gets insulted and he goes and tells everyone,
and they're like, "Your dog bit this guy! What are you going to do
about it?" And he's like, "I don't have a dog!" And they're like,
"What? Yeah you do!" And he's like, "No I didn't! I just made it up!"
And they're like, "You're lying! Everybody knows about your dog!" And
no matter what he says, they won't believe there wasn't a dog. And they
get angry and they're about to tar and feather him and run him out of
town.
[Beat.]
[Close up on the face of Ayn Rand.]
Yukino: [off] So did they?
[Cut back to Castor.]
Kano: [off] Well, they were going to, but then the farmer has an idea.
So he says, "Fine. Only one thing for it then, I'm going to have to put
the thing down." And the priest, who I guess was supposed to be the
wisest guy in the whole village, said it was okay. So the farmer goes
inside, gets his gun, and tells everyone to gather by his barn. He
makes like he's calling his dog, and he goes behind the barn where
nobody can see him. And he fires into the air. And he comes back and he
tells everyone, "The dog's dead." And the thing is, everybody buys it,
and they all decide the dog is dead and they all go away and never
bother him again. [beat] Which is pretty dumb, but I guess the point
was he'd learned his lesson not to tell lies any more, so there was
really no need to tar and feather him really.
[Cut back to the shot of the two posters on the wall.]
Yukino: [off; after some thought] I guess. [beat] What the hell else
was he supposed to do, though?
Kano: [off] I dunno. Pay the doctor's bill, I guess.
Yukino: [off] But what if the guy would've lost his hand anyway?
Kano: [off; dismissive, laughing a bit] How should I know? It's just a
dumb story. 'Sides, it's not like they could have been that smart
anyway, believing in a dog just 'cause some guy said there was.
Yukino: [off; reflective] I don't know.
Kano: [off] Hm?
[Front view of Yukino's head and upper torso. She is now lying back
down, flat on her back, her left hand on her chest, looking up towards
the ceiling, looking as if lost in thought.]
Yukino: What I mean is, it never ceased to amaze me how easy it was to
fool people, about how perfect I was, and they never suspected a thing.
People believe what they want to believe, I guess.
Kano: [off] It kind of helped that you really were the number one
student in the whole school, you know.
[Yukino turns her face to her right (camera left) towards Kano, off
camera to her left, and suddenly smiles endearingly.]
Yukino: [chuckling at a memory] _You_ were the one reading billboards
at the top of your lungs when you were three years old and making Mom
and Dad freak when I couldn't read, period.
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from her right
profile as she looks towards the camera (i.e. at Kano).]
Yukino: Or getting good grades year in and year out without studying
hardly, and just reading what you liked, when I had to study like crazy
to keep up my image, just to know what to know to pass tests.
[Shot from the floor of the head and upper torso of Kano, who at some
point has silently lain down on the floor beside her sister. She is
looking to her left (camera right) towards Yukino.]
Kano: _Pass_ tests? Sis, you could've _passed_ those tests without
breaking a sweat.
Yukino: [off; chuckling] Yeah, well...your definition of 'pass' isn't
the same as mine. We both know how anal I am...
Kano: [laughing too] I guess...
Yukino: [off] But Kano...I'm convinced you're smarter than I am. I
mean, I could study all those hard books of yours for a test, maybe,
but I couldn't actually sort of understand them like you do...
[Kano is pleased but embarrassed; she blushes, looks away from her
sister.]
Kano: [dismissive] Yeah, enough to talk out of my butt like I always
do...
Yukino: [off] You knew enough to give me what I needed to set me
straight when I needed it. Maybe you didn't know it at the time, but
you did. [beat] Point is...while I was beating myself senseless trying
to be number one you were having fun learning stuff you liked. Making
it part of you, I guess. Like Aya becoming a writer because she enjoyed
it and she knew she could be good at it. Nobody made her take an exam
on that, right? And now...
Kano: She's Ayaki Sawai?
Yukino: [off] Exactly! [beat; a bit sadly] All _I_ know how to do is
pass exams.
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from her right
profile as she looks towards the camera (i.e. at Kano). She suddenly
looks more serious.]
Yukino: [firmly] Look, I don't want you selling yourself short like
that any more, okay? You don't have to compare yourself to me. Neither
does Tsukino. I can tell her that, or you can tell her that, your call.
Kano: [off; reflective] I dunno. Maybe after a while I began to believe
the hype myself. I mean, all the teachers thought you were God, and
they said so too...
[Yukino turns her head back towards the ceiling.]
Yukino: [softly] Well, they shouldn't have. They only did because they
didn't know any better. I thought you guys did, but...[beat;
reflective] I thought I made that girl up, and when I stopped
pretending to be her, she'd disappear, but I guess after a while she
took on a life of her own. [beat] Maybe I'll never be rid of her at all
now. I still don't have that many friends at school, you know. Most
people still treat me like royalty half the time.
[Cut back to Kano as she looks at her sister. She suddenly smiles.]
Kano: [teasing] What do they treat you like the rest of the time?
Yukino: [off] A psycho. "Ack! It's Miyazawa! Avoid eye contact!"
[Cut back to the posters as both girls titter.]
[Beat.]
Kano: [off] Is that why you wanted to go to school and burn the picture
and make yourself look stupid in front of Mrs. Thibodeaux?
Yukino: [off] Yeah. So they'd see what I was really like and they
wouldn't club you over the head with how cool I was any more. [beat]
That was a dumb idea, wasn't it? It probably wouldn't have worked
anyway. Mr. Kawashima knows what me and Arima are like, and he still
tells people, "Why can't you be more like Miyazawa?" right in front of
me. And he knows better. Kind of embarrassing...
[A stylized bulging vein appears on Nanami's brow.]
Kano: [off; firmly] Sis! Stop it!
Yukino: [off; confused] Stop what?
Kano: [off] Running _your_self down like that! Face it! You're the best
student in the whole school! You really are! You think you're not
supposed to be proud of that? I always was! We all were! You think we
wouldn't be?
Yukino: [off] Well, no, but...
Kano: [off; almost scolding] Tell me the truth. How far did your grades
drop that Mom and Dad got called into school?
Yukino: [off] Arima and I were tied for number one in the first-year
class. He dropped to third and I dropped to 13th.
[A stylized bulging vein appears on Ayn Rand's brow.]
Yukino: [off; grumbling] I was seriously pissed off about that. I mean
he blew off as much as I did and he didn't drop nearly as far...
Kano: [off; incredulous] Big deal! I've been number 20 year after
stinking year! It's starting to get annoying! You were at number 13 and
Mom and Dad got called into school and your teacher told you to dump
Arima over that? What a jerk!
Yukino: [off; trying to be fair] Kawashima meant well, really he did. I
sure noticed. Why wouldn't he?
Kano: [off; not buying it] Yeah, well, I still say he sucks!
Yukino: [off; suddenly laughing] I'm still ticked about Arima only
falling to number three, you know. I was like, "No way in hell was he
blowing off. He was studying behind my back, the bastard!"
Kano: [off; pretending to sob] "You betrayed me! I never want to see
you again!"
Yukino: [off] Well, I didn't say that, I just kicked his butt!
[titters] And he was like, "I wasn't studying! I swear!" And that just
made it worse, because I was like, "Who the hell is this guy?"
Kano: [off] No kidding. Do you remember how much you freaked out when
you thought Arima really was practically perfect in every way when
you'd been faking it the whole time? [laughs]
Yukino: [off; laughing too] How could I forget? You'd get an
inferiority complex too around him, too...
[They laugh a moment more before trailing off.]
[Beat.]
Kano: [off] Say, sis...
Yukino: [off] Yes?
Kano: [off] I just thought...you must do this with Arima a lot, huh?
[A sweatdrop appears on Ayn Rand's brow.]
Yukino: [off] What? Fall to pieces and tell him stuff he could have
gone his whole life not knowing?
[A stylized bulging vein appears on Nanami's brow.]
Kano: [off] No, silly! [beat; end bulging vein] I mean just talking
about feelings and stuff.
[End sweatdrop.]
Yukino: [off; not quite understanding] We talk all the time, Kano. You
talk to Tsukino, too, more than I do. I mean, she's been really busy
lately, but most of the time...
Kano: [off] That's not what I mean. I mean...yeah, we talk about stuff,
and we're all pals, and I love Tsukino and you and Mom and Dad to
death, and vice versa..._I hope!_...but I can't really talk about my
feelings to Tsukino, or Mom, or Dad, or anybody. Not seriously anyway.
[beat] Think. When was the last time we had a serious conversation in
our house? [beat] About anything?
[Beat.]
Yukino: [off; thoughtful] You know, Kano, I don't know. I really don't.
At New Year's Mom and Dad talked to the Arimas, but that was really to
them, not to us. Maybe Mom and Dad do when they're by themselves. But
no, not with us. Not really. [beat] Yeah, I guess you have a point.
[beat] I'm as much to blame as anyone, though. I don't think I ever
even tried before tonight. [beat] You really thought for a moment there
that I just was playing another game, didn't you?
Kano: [off] Sort of, yeah.
Yukino: [off; chuckling] We're a pretty insensitive bunch in this
house, huh?
Kano: [off; laughing with her] Yeah, I guess we are!
[Beat.]
[Still of the light hanging from the ceiling of the Miyazawa girl's
bedroom. It is currently turned off.]
Yukino: [off] Don't you have anyone else, though? At school, or
anything?
Kano: [off] Not really. Megumi and Yurika are cool, but we don't really
talk about anything important.
Yukino: [off; sadly] Maybe you should, love. You sound like you must be
really lonely. [beat] Come to think of it, so might they. You don't
know. [beat] You know, Kano, I was friends with Arima before we started
dating or anything else. He was probably the first friend I ever had in
my life. Trust me, the romance is just frosting. What a person needs is
friends.
[Beat.]
Kano: [off; reflective] I kind of envy you having Arima. Someone to
share things with.
Yukino: [off] I'd be lost without Arima. I'd be much, much worse off
today if I hadn't met him.
Kano: [off] You mean you'd still be the Queen of Fake?
Yukino: [off] I just might, you don't know. [beat] Scratch that. I'm
sure I would.
Kano: [off] On the other hand, you wouldn't have met Asaba, either, so
I wouldn't have gotten my heart broken tonight...
Yukino: [off; sincerely apologetic] I'm sorry...
Kano: [off] 'Sokay. It had to happen eventually, I guess...
Yukino: [off] Not necessarily. I never had my heart broken by a boy.
[beat] I pray I never do. [beat; lighter] Mind you, I talk about silly
stuff with Arima, as well. [titters, with Kano joining in; beat] But
you know, love, you can't just depend on any one person. I don't just
depend on Arima. I have Asapin, and Maho, and Tsubasa, and...bunches of
people, now I think of it. It's really not hard to find real friends,
if you actually try. [beat] You know, that's actually Arima's problem.
Kano: [off] What?
Yukino: [off] He doesn't have anybody else, except his parents, maybe,
and I don't know if they've really been much help.
Kano: [off; surprised] They seem like nice people.
Yukino: [off] They are really nice. [beat] You've no idea. When I met
them first I was like, "I wish I had this guy's parents!" [laughs; Kano
might join in. Finally, more seriously:] Though. You've no idea how
much his mom and dad have opened up, just since New Year's. They're
really warm and expressive now. They're like totally different people.
They were nice before, but...really stiff, really quiet. Not really the
sort I think would talk much either.
Kano: [off] Uh-huh.
Yukino: [off] That, and he was afraid to depend on anyone for the
longest time, not even his parents, because he thought he had to be
perfect, because of his dad. [beat] You remember how he said he wanted
to go to America to study at New Year's?
Kano: [off] Yeah.
Yukino: [off] You see...he really wanted to go because he wanted to
escape from his family. And he told me, he couldn't think of a single
thing he'd miss, except maybe his parents.
Kano: [off; shocked] Not even you? Or Asaba, or anybody?
Yukino: [off] That's what I said. And he said, "I won't have to miss
you. I want you to come with me."
Kano: [off] Do you think you would?
Yukino: [off] I don't know. [beat] It'd be really tough. I'd have to
leave everything behind, pretty much. I'd have Arima, but that's about
all I'd have, at least for a while, 'til I learned to talk to people in
English enough to make some new friends, and even then you and Tsukino
and Mom and Dad would be really far away, so I'd hardly ever get to see
you. I'd be really lonely. So would he. Problem is, I don't think he
realizes that, Kano. He seems to think I'm all he could ever possibly
need.
Kano: [off] Do you think he still wants to? Go to America and study and
stuff?
Yukino: [off] I don't know. I haven't asked him. Fact is, I'm a bit
afraid to bring it up again. Why?
Kano: [off] I mean...his relations I guess aren't going to bug him any
more, and his parents are better...so maybe he won't want to go any
more...
Yukino: [off; laughs sadly] Whether or not he wants to go or not isn't
the point. I mean, if it turned out he really wanted to go, I probably
would anyway. He was just thinking about it, anyway.
Kano: [off] What is the point?
Yukino: [off] The point is...he depends on me too much, Kano. He
depends on me far too much.
Kano: [off; not quite understanding] Do you think he takes you for
granted or something?
Yukino: [off] No, no! That's not it at all. I mean...he depends on me a
lot more than I depend on him. I don't depend just on him. I don't
_want_ to depend just on him. I don't want to do that to him. But he
does it to me.
Kano: [off] Do you resent him for that?
Yukino: [off] It's not a matter of resenting, Kano. I mean, I could
tell him to go to hell tomorrow, but I don't want to do that. I look
after him because I love him and I want to look after him. But I
shouldn't have to do it alone. I don't want him to do this to me. I
don't want him to do it to himself. He's got his parents, he's got
Asapin...he'd have lots more people if he tried, because he's really a
nice guy. I feel like shaking him and going, "What's the matter with
you? You've gotta make more friends than just me, ya know!" Because I
have more friend than just him. But he hasn't really even tried. He
thinks I'm all he has to depend on, and I think that scares even him. I
think he's scared that one day maybe I won't need him any more and
he'll be all alone again. So if he thinks anything'll get in the way of
me and him, anything at all, he starts to panic and...[her voice
trembles]...and then if I don't make him get a grip on himself, he
might do something crazy like at New Year's...
Kano: [off; getting worried] Do you think he'd hurt you?
Yukino: [off; trying to sound reassuring Kano, not quite managing it]
No, no, no. This is going to sound really conceited, but the poor guy
worships the ground I walk on. I don't think he'd ever dream of it. Or
if he would, he's had plenty of chances to do it, and he hasn't yet.
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from right
profile. She is looking up towards the ceiling, her expression tinged
with fear.]
Yukino: [trying to reassure herself] No, he'd never hurt me. [failing]
Not on purpose, anyway. I'm more afraid he'll hurt someone else, like
at New Year's, or himself...[her voice trembles harder] Kano, what if
he asks Dad to let me marry him and Dad doesn't want him to and he
tries to hurt Dad? What if _I_ tell him I don't _want_ to marry him?
What'll he do then?
[Shot from the floor of Kano's head and upper torso from left profile.
She is looking towards her sister, concern on her face.]
Kano: [taking up the job of comforter] Sis, I think Dad kind of likes
Arima. If that's what you guys really wanted to do, I don't think he'd
try to stop you, not really.
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from right
profile. She has turned towards Kano.]
Kano: [off] I mean, when the Arimas talked about it he didn't flip out,
did they?
Yukino: No. No, he didn't. [turns back towards the ceiling] Oh, God,
the Arimas. I think they took one look at me and thought "daughter-in-
law."
[Shot from the floor of Kano's head and upper torso from left
profile, still looking towards Yukino. She might be stifling a giggle.]
Yukino: [off] I had no idea how old-fashioned they really were. I mean,
I thought I'd just die. Even Arima got embarrassed about it.
Kano: Don't you like the Arimas? I do...
Yukino: [off] No, they're really sweet but...I guess they don't really
have a family any more. So I guess they figured they needed a new one,
fast. [laughs sadly] Maybe Arima gets it from his dad. I dunno.
[Kano turns towards the ceiling.]
Kano: You think Arima's dad overreacted, maybe?
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from right
profile. She is looking up towards the ceiling, now a bit calmer.]
Yukino: Mom sure thought so. I think they think we're way cooler than
we are. They sure think I'm all that for some reason. I dunno. [beat]
You know, you're the first person I've talked about this to, except
maybe Arima himself. [softly; apologetic] I'm sorry!
[Kano turns back towards Yukino.]
Kano: Why?
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from right
profile. She is looking towards her sister, a sad, apologetic smile on
her face.]
Yukino: I shouldn't be going on about my problems to you when you
wanted _me_ to help you, should I?
Kano: [off] No. It's okay. Really. You know, in a way, you are.
Yukino: [suddenly a little surprised] How?
[Shot from the floor of Kano's head and upper torso from left profile.
She is looking towards her sister.]
Kano: Because...[trying to figure out what to say] I guess...I never
knew any of this. Maybe...[turns back towards the ceiling] maybe you
can't really be close to someone, until you know something about them
nobody else knows.
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from right
profile. She is looking back towards the ceiling.]
Yukino: That could be...
[Still of the ceiling light.]
Kano: [off] Because they trust you enough to tell you, or...
Yukino: [off] Or you get caught with your britches down...
Kano: [off; suddenly nervous] I'm sorry, really...
Yukino: [off] You know, Kano, I actually meant the time I answered the
door in my sweatsuit and Arima was standing there. [laughs; suddenly
more thoughtful] You might be right. I wouldn't let anyone get close to
me, and when I finally let my guard down, just for a moment, and let
someone see something I wouldn't have dared let them see, it just sort
of happened. And everything changed. [beat] You know, maybe in some
weird way it's just as well this happened.
Kano: [off] That what happened? I ran off to Asaba's?
Yukino: [off] That you heard Arima and me. Maybe you needed to, I
guess. To see that side of me. Maybe you're right. Maybe you'd have
never seen it otherwise.
Kano: [off; thoughtful] Hm. [beat] You know, you're taking this really
well.
Yukino: [off] Maybe I am. [beat; completely serious] Kano.
Kano: [off] Yes?
Yukino: [off; completely serious, perhaps a little threatening] Now you
know the truth. That means you don't have an excuse any more. If I ever
find out you were spying on us again, I won't be nearly as
understanding. Do we understand each other?
Kano: [off; sincerely] Yes. I won't do it again. I promise.
Yukino: [off; with more levity, trying to take the edge off] Good. Now
we understand each other, we can resume sharing our feelings.
[They both titter.]
[Beat.]
Kano: [off] You're really worried about Arima, aren't you?
Yukino: [off; laughing sadly] Every day of my life. You've no idea.
Kano: [off] Do you think you really will marry Arima?
Yukino: [off] I have no clue. No clue at all. [beat] At the very least
I think I need more time to figure out what I'm letting myself in for.
[beat] But I'm not ready to give up on him. Not yet, anyway.
Kano: [off] His parents are better. Do you think that means he'll get
better too?
Yukino: [off] Maybe. I really hope so. [beat] But you know, Kano, after
hearing all this you'll call me stupid, probably, but you couldn't pay
me to give the guy up. I can't imagine life without him.
Kano: [off] It's not stupid at all. I mean, you can't pick who you
like. [beat; a hit of apology] Aya Sawada said that, by the way...
Yukino: [off] No, you're right. You can't really. [beat] Maybe you're
not supposed to. [titters] I mean come on. If you could, we'd all
probably wait until we found the perfect guy and nobody'd have children
and it'd be the end of civilization or something. That'd be even worse,
right?
Kano: [off; tittering too] Yeah, really!
[Beat.]
[Cut back to the posters.]
Kano: [more thoughtful] Relationships are rough, aren't they? I mean,
I'd heard that before, but Mom and Dad get on real well and they hardly
ever fight or anything, and you and Arima seemed like the perfect
couple and you never fought either, so I guess I never really believed
it and I thought it really was just lovey-dovey stuff, or something...
Yukino: [off] No, we don't fight much, I guess. [beat] But you
know...they say "for better or for worse" for a reason. Relationships
are a lot of work. Real ones, I mean.
[The brow of Ayn Rand sprouts a bulging vein.]
Yukino: [a bit peeved] Heck, it's not like we do the physical stuff
that much. Kind of pisses me off sometimes.
[The brow of Nanami sprouts a sweatdrop.]
Kano: [off; unnerved] Ooo...kay...
[End vein and sweatdrop.]
Yukino: [off; a happier tone] We make time for as much cuddling as we
can, though. [more seriously, but still happily] And he looks after me,
too. He really does. [beat] I guess I mean...I guess I've made it sound
awful, but a relationship really is worth it, if you think you can
handle it, if you want to handle it. But you got to be really sure
you're ready for it, Kano, because even money says you'll get a lot
more than you bargained for. I know I did. I'm amazed _I_ can handle
it. [laughs] I dunno. I guess I'm made of sterner stuff than I thought.
Kano: [off] Maybe, you don't know. Maybe you get more from Mom than
your good looks. She's pretty good in a crisis.
Yukino: [off; feigning conceit] Well, I'm glad you agree about the good
looks, at least!
[General titters.]
[Beat.]
Kano: [beat] I guess Asaba tried to tell me that, too. He said to me,
"My life sucks. Trust me, you do not want the job of keeping me out of
trouble. It's tough enough for Arima, and he doesn't have to live with
me." But when he said it I thought he was just saying stuff to blow me
off because he didn't think I was pretty enough, or something, and I
didn't listen until now.
Yukino: [off] Yeah. I guess Asapin's had a rough life. Rougher than
Arima even. At least Arima's parents actually like him. Asapin's all by
himself. I guess all he has is Arima, and me. Maybe me, I like to think
me.
Kano: [off; not a hint of jealousy] I think he really likes you a lot.
Asaba, I mean.
Yukino: [off] I like him too. [beat] Arima really does care about him,
too. You'd never tell by listening to him, but he does. [beat] But
Arima's all he really had. You know, when I started seeing Arima, he
was actually pretty jealous of me, because I guess he thought I was
stealing Arima from him, or something. Amazing how well we get along
now. [beat] He thinks the world of you and Tsukino, too.
Kano: [off; suddenly pensive] Hm.
Yukino: [off; softly] I'm guessing he was really worried about you,
when you showed up at his door.
Kano: [off; pensive] I guess.
[Beat.]
Yukino: [off] It just struck me. You're way calmer now than earlier. A
bit too calm, come to think of it.
Kano: [off; pensive] Am I? [beat] Yeah, I guess I am. [beat] I guess...
I should still be really upset, but...well, I kind of had some sleep
when I got in, so that might've helped a bit. [beat] And I cried.
Buckets. [beat] So by the time you got upstairs, I was just plain
grouchy and I took it out on you. Maybe it just means I can't cry any
more.
[Beat.]
Yukino: [off; tender, concerned] Is there anything you want me to do?
Do you want me to talk to Asapin, maybe?
Kano: [off] No, no...it's okay...
Yukino: [off; concerned] You sure?
Kano: [off] I mean, it's not _really_ okay, but...I talked to Asaba
already. There's nothing you really can do, honestly. I'm just going to
have to live with it, I guess. [beat] Thanks though. [beat] I wouldn't
want you to make him like me anyway, even if you could. [suddenly
giggles] It'd be like...I dunno...dating a zombie or something...
[Yukino joins in for a moment; both recover; beat] I wouldn't want him
to go on dates with me if I didn't think he really liked me anyway. I
really wouldn't want him to go out with me and pretend he liked me when
he didn't...
Yukino: [off] No, neither would anyone, I think.
Kano: [off] So...I didn't just want a boyfriend, I wanted a boy to like
me. So I did all this stuff so he would, which was silly really. You
can't pick who you like, right?
Yukino: [off; suddenly endearing] Were you trying to make him dinner?
Kano: [off; titters] Actually, yeah.
Yukino: [off] That was really sweet.
Kano: [off] Thanks, I guess...
Yukino: [off; laughs at herself] Lucky Asapin. Poor Arima's the one who
always ends up making _me_ dinner...
Kano: [off; tittering with her] Oh yeah?
Yukino: [off] Yeah. I'm really mean to the poor guy sometimes. [beat]
But you were kind of right about that.
Kano: [off] About what?
Yukino: [off] About how I didn't try. It's not like I knew exactly how
to use my feminine charms to attract the man of my dreams...
Kano: [off; apologetic] Look, I was really upset when I said that,
okay? I know better...
Yukino: [off] I know. [beat] But it's kind of a mystery to me too.
These days people just kind of like me for some reason. People who have
no reason to like me at all. Like Tsubasa.
Kano: [off] What do you mean?
[Still to a framed photo (possibly on Yukino's desk) of Arima, Yukino
(her face obscured by shadow) and Tsubasa at New Year's, Tsubasa
looking extremely cute in a kimono (of a color hard to determine in the
shadows, granted).]
Yukino: [off] Well...she really liked Arima, and she basically accused
me of stealing him from her. [beat] Kind of like she thought her
stepmom was stealing her dad, come to think of it.
Kano: [off] Huh.
Yukino: [off] Arima'd always kind of looked after her, you see. But
when she ran away from home she ran to me, not Arima. [beat] I wonder
why that is. I mean, Arima was the one she liked, not me. [beat] Or
Maho.
Kano: [off] Maho Isawa?
[Still of a photo (possibly on Yukino's desk) of Maho and Yukino
sitting on a bench in a shopping district, clad in warm winter clothing
and smiling, looking most comfortable together.]
Yukino: [off] Yes. You know Arima wasn't the first to figure out what I
was really like. That was Maho, and she didn't need to catch me in my
sweatsuit. [titters] She figured it out all by herself, and she was not
impressed. At all. [beat] But now she's like the big sister I never
had. It's amazing. Though one time I called her _onesan_ and she
freaked because I thought I had a crush on her.
Kano: [off; pretends to weep for joy] "_Onesan_!" [giggles]
Yukino: [off] You've no idea. She's so straight it isn't funny.
Actually Tsubaki likes to piss her off by going on about how pretty she
is, which is silly, because Maho knows Tsubaki likes guys really.
[giggles] So I just call her _onesan_ behind her back.
Kano: [off] But aren't you, like, in the same grade though?
Yukino: [off] So is Tsubasa. [laughs] You know how big a baby she is.
Maho...I dunno...she's like, way more mature than I'll ever be...
Kano: [off; unimpressed] Huh. I dunno. She just struck me as real
unsociable, is all. Real distant and stuff, like "I don't wanna be
here. These people piss me off. I don't know these people..."
Yukino: [off; in defense] She's just not very comfortable around a lot
of people. She doesn't trust a lot of people enough to be friends with
them. She doesn't really like Tsubasa and her friends much. She just
hangs out with them because I do. She doesn't trust a lot of people, so
it's really hard to get to know her real well. [beat; giggles like a
girl in love] But once you do she's really very sweet and kind. Really
understanding. That, and she's really very pretty when she wants to
be...
Kano: [off; suddenly teasing] Aw, you have a crush on Maho. It's so
cute...!
[Beat.]
Yukino: [off; thinking about that] Yeah. Yeah, maybe just a little...
[They both titter about that.]
Kano: [off; more seriously] But I guess she trusts you, huh?
Yukino: [off] Yes. Yes, I think so. I'm probably the best friend _she_
has. Her best girl friend anyway. Seriously, I can tell her stuff I
couldn't ever tell Arima. Like...
Kano: [off] Like how worried you are about him?
[Beat.]
Yukino: [off] Yes. Some of it. [beat] So you see, Arima's not the only
one I have heart-to-hearts with, because I can't tell him everything.
Actually, this is more like me and Maho.
[Cut back to the posters of Ayn Rand and Nanami.]
Kano: [off; concerned] But shouldn't you say something to him, though?
Yukino: [off; defeated] I've tried, now and again, but...it's not like
I can make him change, you know? It's not like I can say, "Make
friends! Now!" [Kano giggles, Yukino joins in; beat] So there's only so
much I can do about it, and the rest I have to deal with somehow. So
Maho's great that way. We're always talking about our men, it's not
even funny. Of course, I help her when I can, but she taught me pretty
much all I know about what's up with guys...
[Tsuwabuki sweatdrops.]
Kano: [off; nervously] Even..._that_?
Yukino: [off; all seriousness] Especially that. You have no idea. When
she found out how far me and Arima had gone she couldn't do enough to
help...
Kano: [off] How'd she...
[Nanami sweatdrops. Tsuwabuki's nose might start to bleed.]
Kano: [off; really nervously] Oh God, she didn't...
[A bulging vein appears on Ayn Rand's brow.]
Yukino: [off; irritated] No, she did _not_ walk in on us naked! Jeez,
how interesting do you think my life is anyway?
Kano: [off; apologetic, small voice] Sorry...
[Ayn Rand's vein gives way to a sweatdrop.]
Yukino: [off] Actually, it kind of came out in conversation. It was
pretty embarrassing, to tell you the truth. I actually didn't mean to
tell her.
[Cut back to the picture of Maho and Yukino.]
Yukino: [narrative] But anyway, she found out, and after that--not just
then, a few days later--she comes up to me at school and grabs me by
the shoulder and she's like, "You're coming to my house after school.
We need to talk." She wasn't asking me, she was telling me. And I'm
like, "But I've got stuff to do at school," and she's like, "Not any
more. This is a matter of life and death." So I figured something was
up, because this isn't something she does every day, so I made some
excuse and I went. And when I got there, she's like, "Okay, Miyazawa,
you're a member of the club..."
Kano: [off; not understanding] The club?
Yukino: [off] That is, I was doing it with Arima. Because she'd said,
when she found out about it, "Welcome to the club." And she's like, "If
you want to stay a member in good standing, you need to learn the
rules." And she basically spent the whole afternoon taking everything
she knew about sex and downloading it into my brain...
Kano: [off; creepily] Like how to drive your man wild in bed?
[Beat.]
Yukino: [off; completely serious] How about places around here where
kids our age can get protection without being asked too many questions?
Kano: [off; chastened] Oh. [beat; thoughtful] You know, that never even
occurred to me. [beat] At Asaba's, I mean.
[Beat.]
Yukino: [off] It didn't occur to me either.
Kano: [off; hesitant] Um...did Arima...
Yukino: [off] Yes. Fortunately he did. [beat; with more levity] You
have no idea. The guy was well prepared. He'd been planning this for
ages. [titters]
Kano: [off; giggling] Oh yeah?
Yukino: [off; more seriously] Well, no, not exactly, but he'd wanted to
for quite a while. He said so. One fine day he just blurted it out.
Kano: [off; a bit put off] Is that a fact?
Yukino: Yup. 'Course I freaked a bit, who wouldn't? [titters] And I was
a little afraid to, and I guess he could tell. He was really nice about
it, though. It's not like he was pressuring me. It was more like he was
begging me. For a sign I really did love him, I guess. [beat] That's
Arima for you. [beat] So he didn't pressure me, but that didn't mean he
didn't still want to, of course. And...I dunno...I think eventually
something inside me decided it was time. And one day in summer he asks
me back to his place, saying, really meaningfully, "Nobody else will be
there." And I went, and when I got there it just sort of happened.
[beat] He made me dinner afterwards. It was pretty nice.
Kano: [off; thinking about that] Hm.
Yukino: [off; ending her digression; narrative] Anyway, I ask her, "So,
like, what are the rules, exactly?" And she told me. [beat] And I guess
now's as good a time as any to tell you. [beat] Rule one: Never let a
guy pressure you into doing anything. Period. She said that, and I'm
like, "That's not my problem, Maho. I think he's actually kind of
afraid to. We haven't done it that many times. I've practically had to
beg him." And she's like, "Huh." And I'm like, "I don't know. I think
he thinks he'll hurt me, or we won't love each other any more, or
something." [a bit peeved] Which would be just like him. [narrative]
And I told her, "He's even afraid to be alone with me these days in
case he'll be tempted to do something perverse. His words, not mine."
Which they were. And she thinks about that, and she says, "If it were
anyone else, I'd say he's getting it somewhere else, but your man
really doesn't strike me as the cheating type." [digressing] Which was
good to hear from Maho. This is the girl who saw through me just like
that. She's a really good judge of character. So if she's never said
anything bad about Arima, that's really good, because she's said plenty
of bad things about me. To my face no less. [resumes] And I'm like, "So
what do you think it is?" And she's like, "You ever think he was maybe
having trouble getting protection and that's why he was avoiding the
situation?" Which I hadn't, and I'm like, "Oh. That could be." And I
guess I looked kind of let down, because she said, "Miyazawa, nobody
said you were wrong. Actually, if he _was_ that worried about it, I'd
be more likely to believe he really does care about you. And you and
him for that matter." [giggles] Which cheered me up. [beat] Rule two,
and I quote: "Never do it without protection. It doesn't matter who has
the job of bringing it, but one of you has to." And I'm like, "What if
you both forget?" And she's like, "The guy's pants have to stay on."
I'm like, "So, what, we have to stop?" And she gives me this look, and
she's like, "No, Miyazawa. I didn't say you couldn't make out, the
guy's pants just have to stay on." [laughs] And then she gets to the
techniques, I guess you'd say.
Kano: [off; her curiosity piqued] Which are?
Yukino: [off] Beside the point right now. [blows a raspberry]
Kano: [off; whining] Sis...!
Yukino: [off; resuming] But she tells me all this stuff, and when she's
done I'm like, "God, Maho, how do you know all this?" and I laugh and I
decide to tease her and I ask, "So, what? Did you escape from a
sultan's harem, or something?" But when I said that she gave me a
really hard look, and she's like, "Let me ask you a question, Miyazawa.
Why do you think girls in a harem learned all this stuff?" And I'm
like, "To please the sultan, I guess," and she's like, "That and to
make sure they didn't kill themselves bearing heirs to the throne just
because they'd get her heads cut off if they told him no. In those
days, they didn't have protection. So they had to distract him somehow,
so they didn't end up pregnant or catch whatever STD he happened to
have, and in those days they couldn't cure them. Point is, do it
without protection, consider yourself pregnant or worse. I'm trying to
help you here, Miyazawa. I'm not telling you all this stuff so you can
have fun with your man. This is a matter of life and death." Which was
pretty heavy stuff, and I guess she must have realized she scared me a
little, because then she just sort of smiled and said, "It is pretty
fun, though." And we both just laughed...
Kano: [off] So where _did_ she learn them?
Yukino: [off] Seriously? Found some in books. A few she just made up
all on her own. Or so she says, anyway. Some she learned from her
boyfriend. [beat; delivering a punchline] I guess they never remember
either. [laughs, with Kano joining in; beat; completely serious] But
you know, Kano...
Kano: [off] Yes?
Yukino: [off] She had a point. If you don't know what you're doing you
can get yourself in real trouble. I was really lucky. [beat] For that
matter so were you.
Kano: [off; hesitant] Um...sis...did you really think Asaba would
have...
Yukino: [off] No. I trust Asapin. I do. He wouldn't hurt you. [beat]
Lots of guys wouldn't care, though.
[Beat.]
Kano: [off] Were there other rules?
Yukino: [off] Actually, yes. She told me rule three: Never get drunk or
high when you're alone with a guy. You'll forget rules one and two.
[beat] Not that you should be drinking anyway, Kano.
Kano: [off] 'k.
Yukino: [off] Then she told me rules four and five, and I don't think I
ever saw her more serious about anything in her life. Here's rule four:
Never do it with a guy you don't love with all your heart. Which means
you've got to be absolutely sure you do before you do anything with
him. And she told me that, and let it sink in for a moment, and she
said, "So do you?" And I said, "Yes, of course," like it was nothing,
and she's like, "Not good enough. Look at me. Straight in the eye.
Don't even blink." So I did, and she's like, "Let's try this again. So
do you?" And I said, as sincerely as I could, "Yes." And she thought
about it, to figure out if I'd said it right, maybe, and then she said,
"Does he?" And I'm like, "I really shouldn't speak for..." But I never
finish, because she's like, "Yes or no." And I say, "Yes." And she
thinks about that, to figure out if I meant it, I guess, and then she's
like, "Okay. I believe you."
Kano: [off; teasing] "You may kiss the bride!"
Yukino: [off; suddenly dissolving into titters] Yeah, really!
[recovering; beat] Yeah, I suppose it was a bit like a marriage
ceremony. Which _is_ a bit freaky. I mean, think. We haven't been
dating that long...
Kano: [off; getting into this] I still say you should. And have, like,
six kids!
Yukino: [off; feigning shock] _Six_!? Jeez, I can't do that _and_ rule
the world at the same time! [laughs]
Kano: [off; creepily] I told you you'd be a great mom, you don't want
that going to waste, right?
Yukino: [off] Having Arima's kids...[reflective] Would he be a good
dad, though? That's what I'm thinking.
Kano: [off] He'd probably think they were all that, like Dad thinks we
are. [beat; more seriously] Seriously, though. Don't you think they're
a lot alike?
Yukino: [off] How?
Kano: [off] Well...I guess all Dad really had after great-grandpa died
was Mom.
Yukino: [off; contemplating that] I never thought of that. [beat] That
explains some things.
Kano: [off] So what was rule five?
Yukino: [off] Here's rule five. Never, ever, _ever_ do it with a guy
who doesn't love you back. She said that to me, and then she said, and
I'll remember this 'til the day I die: "That means: the moment it even
occurs to you that the guy would ever dream of betraying you, you dump
him like a ton of bricks. Don't let him try to win you back, don't let
him try to, quote, unquote, 'explain,' don't listen to him when he
promises to quote, unquote, 'change,' because he won't, don't listen to
a goddamn word he says. Because bastards like that know exactly what a
girl wants to hear. Best thing to do is to call him out of the blue and
say, "It's over, you piece of shit," and hang up before he says a word.
And you do whatever it takes to keep him away from you from then on,
and you tell everyone who'll listen what a scumbag he is, and maybe,
just maybe, you'll save some other poor girl from suffering because of
him." And she had this really intense look on her face as she said it.
And I'm like, "Is that necessary?" And she's like, "No, Miyazawa.
What's necessary is to cut it off and shove it down his throat until he
chokes on it. But you can get put in jail for that because there's no
justice in this world, so you'll just have to hope that's enough." And
I'm getting freaked out, and I'm like, "What if you actually still like
the guy?" And she pauses for breath, and then she says, "I know. It'll
hurt. It'll hurt a lot. But some things hurt worse, okay?" And I'm
like, "Do you really think Arima would..." And maybe she realized she
was freaking me out, because she said, "No. I'm not accusing your man
of anything. You trust him. So I trust him. Just remember this. Follow
all of those rules, and you'll avoid every single mistake I ever made."
[Beat.]
Kano: [off] Did she say what the mistakes were?
Yukino: [off] No. I tried to ask, but she's like, "Miyazawa, count
yourself lucky that I'm telling you as much as I am. My boyfriend knows
what the mistakes were, because I told him. I told you what I did
because I pray you never have to know." [beat] I still don't know. I
mean, I have my ideas, but I don't think I'll ever know for sure.
Whatever it was, I guess she took it pretty hard. [beat] But I'm
thinking she was really worried about me, and she didn't want me to get
hurt like she did.
Kano: [off] Sounds like she really cares about you.
Yukino: [off] Yes, I really think she does. And I care about her too.
[Beat.]
Kano: [off] You think maybe that's why she doesn't trust a lot of
people?
Yukino: [off] That could be. I don't know. Whatever the reason, I'm
guessing she basically trusts her boyfriend, and for some reason, me.
And that's it. [beat; suddenly conspiratorially] I'm going to tell you
a secret, okay, Kano?
Kano: [off; giggling in expectation] Okay!
Yukino: [off] Now, I told you she was straight as an arrow, and I meant
it. That said...
Kano: [off] That said, what?
[Shot from above of the left forearm of Kano, left, and the right
forearm of Yukino, right, lying side by side on the floor.]
Yukino: [off; softly] She said that, and then--it wasn't the first time
she'd done this, actually, but she's only done it a few times, and she
only does it when we're alone, and only then when she's really
emotional, so I remember it--she very gently took my hand [her hand
moves to take Kano's] and squeezed just like this...[squeezes Kano's
hand; she might rub a bit]
Kano: [off; giggling, maybe a little nervously] Oooh! Keep doing that,
_onesan_!
[Cut back to the posters of Ayn Rand and Nanami.]
Yukino: [off; giggling too] Yeah, it actually was really intense. It
was pretty far out. [in self-defense] Not quite as intense as when
Arima holds my hand or anything, I should point out. Maho doesn't turn
me on or anything...
[Nanami sweatdrops.]
Kano: [off; nervously] Oooh...kay...nobody said she did...
[End sweatdrop.]
Yukino: [off; happily] But it really is nice when she does that.
Kano: [off; suddenly creepy] Next time she does that, you should kiss
her, just to see what she does!
[Ayn Rand sweatdrops.]
Yukino: [off; giggling nervously] Oh, I don't know, Kano. What if it
turned me on? [beat] What if she kisses back?
Yukino:
[off; in unison] AAAAAAAAH!
Kano:
[Beat.]
[End sweatdrop.]
Yukino: [off; dismissive] Nah. She'd probably just kick my ass.
[They have a good titter over that.]
[Beat.]
Kano: [off] You know, Sis?
Yukino: [off] Yes?
Kano: [off] Maho doesn't sound that different from Arima at all.
Yukino: [off] No. No, I guess not.
Kano: [off] Matter of fact, Sis...they're all like him.
Yukino: [off; curious] Who are?
Kano: [off] Maho and Tsubasa and Asaba. They're all kind of lonely
sorts of people.
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from her right
profile as she looks towards the camera (i.e. at Kano). Her eyes
suddenly widen, as if she had had an epiphany.]
Yukino: Thank you, Kano.
[Shot from the floor of Kano's head and upper torso from her left
profile as she looks towards the camera (i.e. at Yukino). She seems
confused.]
Kano: What'd I say?
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from her right
profile. She turns towards the ceiling.]
Yukino: Now I know. Some way, somehow, I must just attract that sort of
person. [laughs sadly] And then poor Mom has to put them up for the
night...
[Shot from the floor of Kano's head and upper torso from her left
profile, still looking at Yukino.]
Kano: [off] I don't think she minds, really...
Yukino: [off] That's not the point. Why me? Why now? This never
happened before...
[Kano suddenly smiles, reassuringly.]
Kano: It might just be, Sis, because they know they can trust you...
[Shot from above of Kano's and Tsukino's hands, still clasped. Kano
squeezes back.]
Kano: [off] ...because whatever you were before, you really are a
loving and caring person now. I didn't believe it before, but I know it
now.
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from her right
profile, as she looks up.]
Yukino: I don't know. You can't be everybody's big sister. Not really.
Kano: [off] But just a few people's okay, right? I mean, they're your
friends, right? [beat] Besides, they look after you too.
Yukino: [smiling for a moment; reassured] It beats having no friends at
all, I'll give you that.
[Yukino turns back towards Kano, suddenly very serious, a bit worried.]
[Shot from above of Kano's and Yukino's hands, still clasped. Yukino
slowly extricates herself from Kano's grip.]
Yukino: [off] Those lonely people. Do they include you?
[Shot from the floor of Kano's head and upper torso from her left
profile, still looking at Yukino. Her smile has dissolved; her eyes
widen a little.]
Kano: What?
Yukino: [off] Kano. I don't want you to depend just on me. I don't want
you worshipping the ground I walk on. I don't want you to do that to
me. I don't want you to do that to yourself. I want you to promise me
you won't do that.
Kano: But...
Yukino: [off] Promise me!
[Beat.]
Kano: I promise. [beat] Are you mad?
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from her right
profile. Her expression has softened. She might shake her head a
little.]
Yukino: No. [beat; smiles sadly; apologetic] I just don't want you to
end up like Arima. Life's too short. [tenderly] Okay?
[Shot from the floor of Kano's head and upper torso from her left
profile, still looking at Yukino. She nods.]
Kano: Okay. [suddenly smiling] We need to do this more often.
[Cut back to the posters of Ayn Rand and Nanami.]
Yukino: [off; lighter] Yeah, this is pretty fun, actually.
Kano: [off] You need to do it with Tsukino, too.
[Ayn Rand sweatdrops.]
Yukino: [off] Well, unless there's a crisis, it's hard to get around to
doing it.
Kano: [off] Well, she'll need to know how to survive in high school,
pretty soon.
[End sweatdrop.]
Yukino: [off] Point. [beat; laughs] At least I won't fall to pieces
over that!
Kano: [off] Yeah, that's good to know! [beat] My point is, though, it
doesn't have to be a crisis. Just...I dunno...take her problems more
seriously. Help her deal with them and stuff. Let her know you're
there.
Yukino: [off] That sounds like a plan.
[Beat.]
Kano: [off] Where _is_ Tsukino, anyway? She should have come up long
ago.
Yukino: [off] Well, I told her we were both sick, so she's
probably still studying downstairs so we can sleep. [beat] Which is
nice of her.
[SFX: Kano's stomach growls.]
[Beat.]
Yukino: [off; endearingly] You should eat before you go to sleep.
Kano: [off] Hm.
[Shot from above of Kano lying on the floor next to Yukino. She sits up
and inspects her uniform.]
Kano: Should probably change too. Can't really sleep in this.
[Cut back to the posters of Ayn Rand and Nanami.]
Kano: [off] Mind if I turn the light on?
Yukino: [off] No, go ahead.
[SFX: The light switch clicking.]
[The light comes on, with color being restored to the posters.]
Kano: [off] Say, Sis...
Yukino: [off] What?
[Close up on the Nanami poster.]
Kano: [off] Do you want me to take down the Nanami poster?
[Shot from slightly above (from, say, Kano's height) of the left
profile of Yukino from the waist up, sitting up in bed. She turns
towards the camera to look at the poster. She smiles.]
Yukino: You don't have to on my account. Nanami's got style...
Kano: [off] I dunno.
[Front view of the head and shoulders of Kano, still in her uniform,
looking at the poster.]
Kano: I was just thinking she's not really what I'm all about any more.
[White screen.]
[Caption: TSUZUKU]
and criticisms I had with the prereaders of "Les perce-neiges de
février/The Snowdrops of February." It was originally supposed to be
part of that story, but I decided to remove it, mostly because it was
so long as to be anti-climactic. I haven't the heart to let it pass
into oblivion, though, and it fortunately was reasonably self-
contained, so I thought I'd share it with you anyway.
Comments are welcome.
Paul Corrigan
corrig11@pilot.msu.edu
(June 16, 2001: Developments in recent installments of the manga
have led to some minor editing, mainly a cut of a passage (regarding
Tsubasa and her stepmom) that is inconsistent with canon and inessential
to the discussion; it was originally a set-up for another fic that
I planned to write but probably never will now; turns out Masami Tsuda
is resolving the Tsubasa/Kazuma situation quite nicely without my help.
For more details go read the translations at karekano.isgreat.net.
The small mistakes I can correct, but the big ones will have to stay.
^_^; )
--
À coeur ouvert/With Open Hearts
--
A side story to "Les perce-neiges de février/The Snowdrops of February"
by Paul Corrigan
--
_Karekano_ concept devised by Masami Tsuda
[Shot of the wall of the Miyazawa girl's bedroom. On the wall, visible
in the dim light, are two posters side by side.
On the left is a print of a drawing of the face of Ayn Rand,
presumably Yukino's.
On the right is a poster, presumably Kano's, of Nanami Kiryu from
_Utena_ (or rather SAGN), in her blue and white Fillette québécoise
outfit, kneeling down beside an apprehensive Mitsuru Tsuwabuki, himself
dressed as the Marié du lis--the Lily Groom--and clad in a similar blue
uniform. Nanami guards Tsuwabuki under one arm and brandishes a sword
in the other. Underneath the picture of Nanami and Tsuwabuki are mug
shots of the other characters in the series, including one of Castor
the beaver, Nanami's animal mascot (in lieu of Chuchu the monkey-mouse
from _Utena_, there being no monkeys native to Quebec).]
Yukino: [off] Kano, tell me...
Kano: [off] What?
Yukino: [off] Why do you think Tsukino wants to go to Hokuei so bad?
Kano: [off] I dunno. [beat] Why? Don't you think that's a good idea?
Yukino: [off] I don't know if it is or not. I mean...I don't want her
to go just because I did.
Kano: [off; reassuring] You know, it is kind of one of the best schools
around here. If she can get in, why not? Why shouldn't she go? [beat;
with more levity] 'Sides, you can tell her which teachers to beware...!
Yukino: [off] No...no...I mean...I don't want either of you guys trying
to do what I did, just because I did. You know? [beat; more softly] I
mean, you could have gotten really hurt trying to do that.
Kano: [off; a bit dismissively] You know, it's not really the same
thing...
Yukino: [off] You don't know. It could be this today and that tomorrow.
[nervously] I _really_ don't want to go through this again...
Kano: [off] Yeah, really. [beat] So tell her so.
Yukino: [off] But how? I mean, it's easy for me to say, "Don't feel
pressured to get into Hokuei, you can go to school in Timbuktu for all
I care..."
Kano: [off; creepily] As long as Mom and Dad pay for it...
Yukino: [off; tittering] Yeah, as long as they pay for it! [beat; more
seriously] But I can't make her _not_ feel pressured, can I?
[thoughtful] I'm sorely tempted to burn that junior high photo of me
after all.
Kano: [off; shocked] No! Don't, Sis! Mom'll kill you!
Yukino: [off] Okay, I won't. [beat; lighter] What say I just draw
glasses and a mustache on the photo instead?
Kano: [off; tittering] Now that would be funny...[completely serious]
...but Mom'd still kill you.
[A sweatdrop might appear on the brow of the drawing of Ayn Rand.]
Yukino: [off; thinking better of it] Yeah, I guess she would. [beat;
end sweatdrop on Ayn Rand] Probably I should just ask her to take it
down.
Kano: [off; curious] What's wrong with that picture anyway? You look
real nice in it, you know...
Yukino: [off] Yeah, that's kind of the problem. Look...the girl in that
picture was a real bitch, okay? We both know that. I'm not proud of
what I was like back then. [beat] So I can't stop Tsukino doing what
she wants to do, but I don't want her to feel pressured because she
thinks that girl's looking over her shoulder. So I guess I just don't
want that girl staring into the back of Tsukino's neck any more. Or
yours, come to think of it.
[Close up on the poster of Nanami.]
Kano: [off; more to herself] Shoot the black dog.
[Close up on the poster of Ayn Rand, which has sprouted an arched
eyebrow.]
Yukino: [off; confused] Huh?
[Close up on the face of Nanami.]
Kano: [off; aloud] From a story I heard once. "The Storyteller's Black
Dog." It's a folktale from French Canada.
[Close up on the face of Ayn Rand.]
Yukino: [off; curious] So where'd you get it? _Nanami_?
[Close up on the apprehensive face of Tsuwabuki.]
Kano: [off; sighing dramatically] You know, sis, it just struck me that
there's a whole generation of Japanese for whom their only experience
of Québécois culture is second-hand through the warped perspective of
_Sovereignty-Associationist Girl Nanami_. [pretending to sob] It's so
terrible...!
[Close up on the face of Ayn Rand, which is now sweatdropping again.]
Yukino: [off; a bit embarrassed] Oh. Okay. Guess that's a no. Shows
what I know, I guess...
[Close up on the mug shot of Miki Kaoru from _Utena_ (or his SAGN
analogue) on the Nanami poster.]
Kano: [off] Seriously? The city library had a book of French Canadian
folk tales lying around, so I checked it out one time and read it from
cover to cover. [beat; getting into her subject] What? To truly
understand _Nanami_ you need to put it in its cultural context, which
requires research...
[Close up on the face of Ayn Rand, which has stopped sweatdropping.]
Yukino: [off] I'm sorry. Learning's always been a means to an end for
me, I guess. [beat; thoughtful] I mean, you've probably learned more
stuff just for fun than I'll ever know. I really don't know much of
anything outside what I've crammed into my head for tests. I don't
think I ever learned anything just for fun. [beat] So what's the story
about?
[Close up on the mug shot of Castor the beaver.]
Kano: [off] 'k. This farmer's scared of burglars, right? But he doesn't
want to buy a guard dog. Turns out this guy's the best storyteller in
the village, so he tells everyone this story about his big black dog
and how fearsome it is, and he tells it so well that everybody believes
him and nobody robs him. Which is fine, until one day some guy comes
along and his hand's bleeding, and he's like, "Your dog bit me! What
are you going to do about it?" And the farmer's like, "No, he didn't,
you moron." And the guy gets insulted and he goes and tells everyone,
and they're like, "Your dog bit this guy! What are you going to do
about it?" And he's like, "I don't have a dog!" And they're like,
"What? Yeah you do!" And he's like, "No I didn't! I just made it up!"
And they're like, "You're lying! Everybody knows about your dog!" And
no matter what he says, they won't believe there wasn't a dog. And they
get angry and they're about to tar and feather him and run him out of
town.
[Beat.]
[Close up on the face of Ayn Rand.]
Yukino: [off] So did they?
[Cut back to Castor.]
Kano: [off] Well, they were going to, but then the farmer has an idea.
So he says, "Fine. Only one thing for it then, I'm going to have to put
the thing down." And the priest, who I guess was supposed to be the
wisest guy in the whole village, said it was okay. So the farmer goes
inside, gets his gun, and tells everyone to gather by his barn. He
makes like he's calling his dog, and he goes behind the barn where
nobody can see him. And he fires into the air. And he comes back and he
tells everyone, "The dog's dead." And the thing is, everybody buys it,
and they all decide the dog is dead and they all go away and never
bother him again. [beat] Which is pretty dumb, but I guess the point
was he'd learned his lesson not to tell lies any more, so there was
really no need to tar and feather him really.
[Cut back to the shot of the two posters on the wall.]
Yukino: [off; after some thought] I guess. [beat] What the hell else
was he supposed to do, though?
Kano: [off] I dunno. Pay the doctor's bill, I guess.
Yukino: [off] But what if the guy would've lost his hand anyway?
Kano: [off; dismissive, laughing a bit] How should I know? It's just a
dumb story. 'Sides, it's not like they could have been that smart
anyway, believing in a dog just 'cause some guy said there was.
Yukino: [off; reflective] I don't know.
Kano: [off] Hm?
[Front view of Yukino's head and upper torso. She is now lying back
down, flat on her back, her left hand on her chest, looking up towards
the ceiling, looking as if lost in thought.]
Yukino: What I mean is, it never ceased to amaze me how easy it was to
fool people, about how perfect I was, and they never suspected a thing.
People believe what they want to believe, I guess.
Kano: [off] It kind of helped that you really were the number one
student in the whole school, you know.
[Yukino turns her face to her right (camera left) towards Kano, off
camera to her left, and suddenly smiles endearingly.]
Yukino: [chuckling at a memory] _You_ were the one reading billboards
at the top of your lungs when you were three years old and making Mom
and Dad freak when I couldn't read, period.
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from her right
profile as she looks towards the camera (i.e. at Kano).]
Yukino: Or getting good grades year in and year out without studying
hardly, and just reading what you liked, when I had to study like crazy
to keep up my image, just to know what to know to pass tests.
[Shot from the floor of the head and upper torso of Kano, who at some
point has silently lain down on the floor beside her sister. She is
looking to her left (camera right) towards Yukino.]
Kano: _Pass_ tests? Sis, you could've _passed_ those tests without
breaking a sweat.
Yukino: [off; chuckling] Yeah, well...your definition of 'pass' isn't
the same as mine. We both know how anal I am...
Kano: [laughing too] I guess...
Yukino: [off] But Kano...I'm convinced you're smarter than I am. I
mean, I could study all those hard books of yours for a test, maybe,
but I couldn't actually sort of understand them like you do...
[Kano is pleased but embarrassed; she blushes, looks away from her
sister.]
Kano: [dismissive] Yeah, enough to talk out of my butt like I always
do...
Yukino: [off] You knew enough to give me what I needed to set me
straight when I needed it. Maybe you didn't know it at the time, but
you did. [beat] Point is...while I was beating myself senseless trying
to be number one you were having fun learning stuff you liked. Making
it part of you, I guess. Like Aya becoming a writer because she enjoyed
it and she knew she could be good at it. Nobody made her take an exam
on that, right? And now...
Kano: She's Ayaki Sawai?
Yukino: [off] Exactly! [beat; a bit sadly] All _I_ know how to do is
pass exams.
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from her right
profile as she looks towards the camera (i.e. at Kano). She suddenly
looks more serious.]
Yukino: [firmly] Look, I don't want you selling yourself short like
that any more, okay? You don't have to compare yourself to me. Neither
does Tsukino. I can tell her that, or you can tell her that, your call.
Kano: [off; reflective] I dunno. Maybe after a while I began to believe
the hype myself. I mean, all the teachers thought you were God, and
they said so too...
[Yukino turns her head back towards the ceiling.]
Yukino: [softly] Well, they shouldn't have. They only did because they
didn't know any better. I thought you guys did, but...[beat;
reflective] I thought I made that girl up, and when I stopped
pretending to be her, she'd disappear, but I guess after a while she
took on a life of her own. [beat] Maybe I'll never be rid of her at all
now. I still don't have that many friends at school, you know. Most
people still treat me like royalty half the time.
[Cut back to Kano as she looks at her sister. She suddenly smiles.]
Kano: [teasing] What do they treat you like the rest of the time?
Yukino: [off] A psycho. "Ack! It's Miyazawa! Avoid eye contact!"
[Cut back to the posters as both girls titter.]
[Beat.]
Kano: [off] Is that why you wanted to go to school and burn the picture
and make yourself look stupid in front of Mrs. Thibodeaux?
Yukino: [off] Yeah. So they'd see what I was really like and they
wouldn't club you over the head with how cool I was any more. [beat]
That was a dumb idea, wasn't it? It probably wouldn't have worked
anyway. Mr. Kawashima knows what me and Arima are like, and he still
tells people, "Why can't you be more like Miyazawa?" right in front of
me. And he knows better. Kind of embarrassing...
[A stylized bulging vein appears on Nanami's brow.]
Kano: [off; firmly] Sis! Stop it!
Yukino: [off; confused] Stop what?
Kano: [off] Running _your_self down like that! Face it! You're the best
student in the whole school! You really are! You think you're not
supposed to be proud of that? I always was! We all were! You think we
wouldn't be?
Yukino: [off] Well, no, but...
Kano: [off; almost scolding] Tell me the truth. How far did your grades
drop that Mom and Dad got called into school?
Yukino: [off] Arima and I were tied for number one in the first-year
class. He dropped to third and I dropped to 13th.
[A stylized bulging vein appears on Ayn Rand's brow.]
Yukino: [off; grumbling] I was seriously pissed off about that. I mean
he blew off as much as I did and he didn't drop nearly as far...
Kano: [off; incredulous] Big deal! I've been number 20 year after
stinking year! It's starting to get annoying! You were at number 13 and
Mom and Dad got called into school and your teacher told you to dump
Arima over that? What a jerk!
Yukino: [off; trying to be fair] Kawashima meant well, really he did. I
sure noticed. Why wouldn't he?
Kano: [off; not buying it] Yeah, well, I still say he sucks!
Yukino: [off; suddenly laughing] I'm still ticked about Arima only
falling to number three, you know. I was like, "No way in hell was he
blowing off. He was studying behind my back, the bastard!"
Kano: [off; pretending to sob] "You betrayed me! I never want to see
you again!"
Yukino: [off] Well, I didn't say that, I just kicked his butt!
[titters] And he was like, "I wasn't studying! I swear!" And that just
made it worse, because I was like, "Who the hell is this guy?"
Kano: [off] No kidding. Do you remember how much you freaked out when
you thought Arima really was practically perfect in every way when
you'd been faking it the whole time? [laughs]
Yukino: [off; laughing too] How could I forget? You'd get an
inferiority complex too around him, too...
[They laugh a moment more before trailing off.]
[Beat.]
Kano: [off] Say, sis...
Yukino: [off] Yes?
Kano: [off] I just thought...you must do this with Arima a lot, huh?
[A sweatdrop appears on Ayn Rand's brow.]
Yukino: [off] What? Fall to pieces and tell him stuff he could have
gone his whole life not knowing?
[A stylized bulging vein appears on Nanami's brow.]
Kano: [off] No, silly! [beat; end bulging vein] I mean just talking
about feelings and stuff.
[End sweatdrop.]
Yukino: [off; not quite understanding] We talk all the time, Kano. You
talk to Tsukino, too, more than I do. I mean, she's been really busy
lately, but most of the time...
Kano: [off] That's not what I mean. I mean...yeah, we talk about stuff,
and we're all pals, and I love Tsukino and you and Mom and Dad to
death, and vice versa..._I hope!_...but I can't really talk about my
feelings to Tsukino, or Mom, or Dad, or anybody. Not seriously anyway.
[beat] Think. When was the last time we had a serious conversation in
our house? [beat] About anything?
[Beat.]
Yukino: [off; thoughtful] You know, Kano, I don't know. I really don't.
At New Year's Mom and Dad talked to the Arimas, but that was really to
them, not to us. Maybe Mom and Dad do when they're by themselves. But
no, not with us. Not really. [beat] Yeah, I guess you have a point.
[beat] I'm as much to blame as anyone, though. I don't think I ever
even tried before tonight. [beat] You really thought for a moment there
that I just was playing another game, didn't you?
Kano: [off] Sort of, yeah.
Yukino: [off; chuckling] We're a pretty insensitive bunch in this
house, huh?
Kano: [off; laughing with her] Yeah, I guess we are!
[Beat.]
[Still of the light hanging from the ceiling of the Miyazawa girl's
bedroom. It is currently turned off.]
Yukino: [off] Don't you have anyone else, though? At school, or
anything?
Kano: [off] Not really. Megumi and Yurika are cool, but we don't really
talk about anything important.
Yukino: [off; sadly] Maybe you should, love. You sound like you must be
really lonely. [beat] Come to think of it, so might they. You don't
know. [beat] You know, Kano, I was friends with Arima before we started
dating or anything else. He was probably the first friend I ever had in
my life. Trust me, the romance is just frosting. What a person needs is
friends.
[Beat.]
Kano: [off; reflective] I kind of envy you having Arima. Someone to
share things with.
Yukino: [off] I'd be lost without Arima. I'd be much, much worse off
today if I hadn't met him.
Kano: [off] You mean you'd still be the Queen of Fake?
Yukino: [off] I just might, you don't know. [beat] Scratch that. I'm
sure I would.
Kano: [off] On the other hand, you wouldn't have met Asaba, either, so
I wouldn't have gotten my heart broken tonight...
Yukino: [off; sincerely apologetic] I'm sorry...
Kano: [off] 'Sokay. It had to happen eventually, I guess...
Yukino: [off] Not necessarily. I never had my heart broken by a boy.
[beat] I pray I never do. [beat; lighter] Mind you, I talk about silly
stuff with Arima, as well. [titters, with Kano joining in; beat] But
you know, love, you can't just depend on any one person. I don't just
depend on Arima. I have Asapin, and Maho, and Tsubasa, and...bunches of
people, now I think of it. It's really not hard to find real friends,
if you actually try. [beat] You know, that's actually Arima's problem.
Kano: [off] What?
Yukino: [off] He doesn't have anybody else, except his parents, maybe,
and I don't know if they've really been much help.
Kano: [off; surprised] They seem like nice people.
Yukino: [off] They are really nice. [beat] You've no idea. When I met
them first I was like, "I wish I had this guy's parents!" [laughs; Kano
might join in. Finally, more seriously:] Though. You've no idea how
much his mom and dad have opened up, just since New Year's. They're
really warm and expressive now. They're like totally different people.
They were nice before, but...really stiff, really quiet. Not really the
sort I think would talk much either.
Kano: [off] Uh-huh.
Yukino: [off] That, and he was afraid to depend on anyone for the
longest time, not even his parents, because he thought he had to be
perfect, because of his dad. [beat] You remember how he said he wanted
to go to America to study at New Year's?
Kano: [off] Yeah.
Yukino: [off] You see...he really wanted to go because he wanted to
escape from his family. And he told me, he couldn't think of a single
thing he'd miss, except maybe his parents.
Kano: [off; shocked] Not even you? Or Asaba, or anybody?
Yukino: [off] That's what I said. And he said, "I won't have to miss
you. I want you to come with me."
Kano: [off] Do you think you would?
Yukino: [off] I don't know. [beat] It'd be really tough. I'd have to
leave everything behind, pretty much. I'd have Arima, but that's about
all I'd have, at least for a while, 'til I learned to talk to people in
English enough to make some new friends, and even then you and Tsukino
and Mom and Dad would be really far away, so I'd hardly ever get to see
you. I'd be really lonely. So would he. Problem is, I don't think he
realizes that, Kano. He seems to think I'm all he could ever possibly
need.
Kano: [off] Do you think he still wants to? Go to America and study and
stuff?
Yukino: [off] I don't know. I haven't asked him. Fact is, I'm a bit
afraid to bring it up again. Why?
Kano: [off] I mean...his relations I guess aren't going to bug him any
more, and his parents are better...so maybe he won't want to go any
more...
Yukino: [off; laughs sadly] Whether or not he wants to go or not isn't
the point. I mean, if it turned out he really wanted to go, I probably
would anyway. He was just thinking about it, anyway.
Kano: [off] What is the point?
Yukino: [off] The point is...he depends on me too much, Kano. He
depends on me far too much.
Kano: [off; not quite understanding] Do you think he takes you for
granted or something?
Yukino: [off] No, no! That's not it at all. I mean...he depends on me a
lot more than I depend on him. I don't depend just on him. I don't
_want_ to depend just on him. I don't want to do that to him. But he
does it to me.
Kano: [off] Do you resent him for that?
Yukino: [off] It's not a matter of resenting, Kano. I mean, I could
tell him to go to hell tomorrow, but I don't want to do that. I look
after him because I love him and I want to look after him. But I
shouldn't have to do it alone. I don't want him to do this to me. I
don't want him to do it to himself. He's got his parents, he's got
Asapin...he'd have lots more people if he tried, because he's really a
nice guy. I feel like shaking him and going, "What's the matter with
you? You've gotta make more friends than just me, ya know!" Because I
have more friend than just him. But he hasn't really even tried. He
thinks I'm all he has to depend on, and I think that scares even him. I
think he's scared that one day maybe I won't need him any more and
he'll be all alone again. So if he thinks anything'll get in the way of
me and him, anything at all, he starts to panic and...[her voice
trembles]...and then if I don't make him get a grip on himself, he
might do something crazy like at New Year's...
Kano: [off; getting worried] Do you think he'd hurt you?
Yukino: [off; trying to sound reassuring Kano, not quite managing it]
No, no, no. This is going to sound really conceited, but the poor guy
worships the ground I walk on. I don't think he'd ever dream of it. Or
if he would, he's had plenty of chances to do it, and he hasn't yet.
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from right
profile. She is looking up towards the ceiling, her expression tinged
with fear.]
Yukino: [trying to reassure herself] No, he'd never hurt me. [failing]
Not on purpose, anyway. I'm more afraid he'll hurt someone else, like
at New Year's, or himself...[her voice trembles harder] Kano, what if
he asks Dad to let me marry him and Dad doesn't want him to and he
tries to hurt Dad? What if _I_ tell him I don't _want_ to marry him?
What'll he do then?
[Shot from the floor of Kano's head and upper torso from left profile.
She is looking towards her sister, concern on her face.]
Kano: [taking up the job of comforter] Sis, I think Dad kind of likes
Arima. If that's what you guys really wanted to do, I don't think he'd
try to stop you, not really.
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from right
profile. She has turned towards Kano.]
Kano: [off] I mean, when the Arimas talked about it he didn't flip out,
did they?
Yukino: No. No, he didn't. [turns back towards the ceiling] Oh, God,
the Arimas. I think they took one look at me and thought "daughter-in-
law."
[Shot from the floor of Kano's head and upper torso from left
profile, still looking towards Yukino. She might be stifling a giggle.]
Yukino: [off] I had no idea how old-fashioned they really were. I mean,
I thought I'd just die. Even Arima got embarrassed about it.
Kano: Don't you like the Arimas? I do...
Yukino: [off] No, they're really sweet but...I guess they don't really
have a family any more. So I guess they figured they needed a new one,
fast. [laughs sadly] Maybe Arima gets it from his dad. I dunno.
[Kano turns towards the ceiling.]
Kano: You think Arima's dad overreacted, maybe?
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from right
profile. She is looking up towards the ceiling, now a bit calmer.]
Yukino: Mom sure thought so. I think they think we're way cooler than
we are. They sure think I'm all that for some reason. I dunno. [beat]
You know, you're the first person I've talked about this to, except
maybe Arima himself. [softly; apologetic] I'm sorry!
[Kano turns back towards Yukino.]
Kano: Why?
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from right
profile. She is looking towards her sister, a sad, apologetic smile on
her face.]
Yukino: I shouldn't be going on about my problems to you when you
wanted _me_ to help you, should I?
Kano: [off] No. It's okay. Really. You know, in a way, you are.
Yukino: [suddenly a little surprised] How?
[Shot from the floor of Kano's head and upper torso from left profile.
She is looking towards her sister.]
Kano: Because...[trying to figure out what to say] I guess...I never
knew any of this. Maybe...[turns back towards the ceiling] maybe you
can't really be close to someone, until you know something about them
nobody else knows.
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from right
profile. She is looking back towards the ceiling.]
Yukino: That could be...
[Still of the ceiling light.]
Kano: [off] Because they trust you enough to tell you, or...
Yukino: [off] Or you get caught with your britches down...
Kano: [off; suddenly nervous] I'm sorry, really...
Yukino: [off] You know, Kano, I actually meant the time I answered the
door in my sweatsuit and Arima was standing there. [laughs; suddenly
more thoughtful] You might be right. I wouldn't let anyone get close to
me, and when I finally let my guard down, just for a moment, and let
someone see something I wouldn't have dared let them see, it just sort
of happened. And everything changed. [beat] You know, maybe in some
weird way it's just as well this happened.
Kano: [off] That what happened? I ran off to Asaba's?
Yukino: [off] That you heard Arima and me. Maybe you needed to, I
guess. To see that side of me. Maybe you're right. Maybe you'd have
never seen it otherwise.
Kano: [off; thoughtful] Hm. [beat] You know, you're taking this really
well.
Yukino: [off] Maybe I am. [beat; completely serious] Kano.
Kano: [off] Yes?
Yukino: [off; completely serious, perhaps a little threatening] Now you
know the truth. That means you don't have an excuse any more. If I ever
find out you were spying on us again, I won't be nearly as
understanding. Do we understand each other?
Kano: [off; sincerely] Yes. I won't do it again. I promise.
Yukino: [off; with more levity, trying to take the edge off] Good. Now
we understand each other, we can resume sharing our feelings.
[They both titter.]
[Beat.]
Kano: [off] You're really worried about Arima, aren't you?
Yukino: [off; laughing sadly] Every day of my life. You've no idea.
Kano: [off] Do you think you really will marry Arima?
Yukino: [off] I have no clue. No clue at all. [beat] At the very least
I think I need more time to figure out what I'm letting myself in for.
[beat] But I'm not ready to give up on him. Not yet, anyway.
Kano: [off] His parents are better. Do you think that means he'll get
better too?
Yukino: [off] Maybe. I really hope so. [beat] But you know, Kano, after
hearing all this you'll call me stupid, probably, but you couldn't pay
me to give the guy up. I can't imagine life without him.
Kano: [off] It's not stupid at all. I mean, you can't pick who you
like. [beat; a hit of apology] Aya Sawada said that, by the way...
Yukino: [off] No, you're right. You can't really. [beat] Maybe you're
not supposed to. [titters] I mean come on. If you could, we'd all
probably wait until we found the perfect guy and nobody'd have children
and it'd be the end of civilization or something. That'd be even worse,
right?
Kano: [off; tittering too] Yeah, really!
[Beat.]
[Cut back to the posters.]
Kano: [more thoughtful] Relationships are rough, aren't they? I mean,
I'd heard that before, but Mom and Dad get on real well and they hardly
ever fight or anything, and you and Arima seemed like the perfect
couple and you never fought either, so I guess I never really believed
it and I thought it really was just lovey-dovey stuff, or something...
Yukino: [off] No, we don't fight much, I guess. [beat] But you
know...they say "for better or for worse" for a reason. Relationships
are a lot of work. Real ones, I mean.
[The brow of Ayn Rand sprouts a bulging vein.]
Yukino: [a bit peeved] Heck, it's not like we do the physical stuff
that much. Kind of pisses me off sometimes.
[The brow of Nanami sprouts a sweatdrop.]
Kano: [off; unnerved] Ooo...kay...
[End vein and sweatdrop.]
Yukino: [off; a happier tone] We make time for as much cuddling as we
can, though. [more seriously, but still happily] And he looks after me,
too. He really does. [beat] I guess I mean...I guess I've made it sound
awful, but a relationship really is worth it, if you think you can
handle it, if you want to handle it. But you got to be really sure
you're ready for it, Kano, because even money says you'll get a lot
more than you bargained for. I know I did. I'm amazed _I_ can handle
it. [laughs] I dunno. I guess I'm made of sterner stuff than I thought.
Kano: [off] Maybe, you don't know. Maybe you get more from Mom than
your good looks. She's pretty good in a crisis.
Yukino: [off; feigning conceit] Well, I'm glad you agree about the good
looks, at least!
[General titters.]
[Beat.]
Kano: [beat] I guess Asaba tried to tell me that, too. He said to me,
"My life sucks. Trust me, you do not want the job of keeping me out of
trouble. It's tough enough for Arima, and he doesn't have to live with
me." But when he said it I thought he was just saying stuff to blow me
off because he didn't think I was pretty enough, or something, and I
didn't listen until now.
Yukino: [off] Yeah. I guess Asapin's had a rough life. Rougher than
Arima even. At least Arima's parents actually like him. Asapin's all by
himself. I guess all he has is Arima, and me. Maybe me, I like to think
me.
Kano: [off; not a hint of jealousy] I think he really likes you a lot.
Asaba, I mean.
Yukino: [off] I like him too. [beat] Arima really does care about him,
too. You'd never tell by listening to him, but he does. [beat] But
Arima's all he really had. You know, when I started seeing Arima, he
was actually pretty jealous of me, because I guess he thought I was
stealing Arima from him, or something. Amazing how well we get along
now. [beat] He thinks the world of you and Tsukino, too.
Kano: [off; suddenly pensive] Hm.
Yukino: [off; softly] I'm guessing he was really worried about you,
when you showed up at his door.
Kano: [off; pensive] I guess.
[Beat.]
Yukino: [off] It just struck me. You're way calmer now than earlier. A
bit too calm, come to think of it.
Kano: [off; pensive] Am I? [beat] Yeah, I guess I am. [beat] I guess...
I should still be really upset, but...well, I kind of had some sleep
when I got in, so that might've helped a bit. [beat] And I cried.
Buckets. [beat] So by the time you got upstairs, I was just plain
grouchy and I took it out on you. Maybe it just means I can't cry any
more.
[Beat.]
Yukino: [off; tender, concerned] Is there anything you want me to do?
Do you want me to talk to Asapin, maybe?
Kano: [off] No, no...it's okay...
Yukino: [off; concerned] You sure?
Kano: [off] I mean, it's not _really_ okay, but...I talked to Asaba
already. There's nothing you really can do, honestly. I'm just going to
have to live with it, I guess. [beat] Thanks though. [beat] I wouldn't
want you to make him like me anyway, even if you could. [suddenly
giggles] It'd be like...I dunno...dating a zombie or something...
[Yukino joins in for a moment; both recover; beat] I wouldn't want him
to go on dates with me if I didn't think he really liked me anyway. I
really wouldn't want him to go out with me and pretend he liked me when
he didn't...
Yukino: [off] No, neither would anyone, I think.
Kano: [off] So...I didn't just want a boyfriend, I wanted a boy to like
me. So I did all this stuff so he would, which was silly really. You
can't pick who you like, right?
Yukino: [off; suddenly endearing] Were you trying to make him dinner?
Kano: [off; titters] Actually, yeah.
Yukino: [off] That was really sweet.
Kano: [off] Thanks, I guess...
Yukino: [off; laughs at herself] Lucky Asapin. Poor Arima's the one who
always ends up making _me_ dinner...
Kano: [off; tittering with her] Oh yeah?
Yukino: [off] Yeah. I'm really mean to the poor guy sometimes. [beat]
But you were kind of right about that.
Kano: [off] About what?
Yukino: [off] About how I didn't try. It's not like I knew exactly how
to use my feminine charms to attract the man of my dreams...
Kano: [off; apologetic] Look, I was really upset when I said that,
okay? I know better...
Yukino: [off] I know. [beat] But it's kind of a mystery to me too.
These days people just kind of like me for some reason. People who have
no reason to like me at all. Like Tsubasa.
Kano: [off] What do you mean?
[Still to a framed photo (possibly on Yukino's desk) of Arima, Yukino
(her face obscured by shadow) and Tsubasa at New Year's, Tsubasa
looking extremely cute in a kimono (of a color hard to determine in the
shadows, granted).]
Yukino: [off] Well...she really liked Arima, and she basically accused
me of stealing him from her. [beat] Kind of like she thought her
stepmom was stealing her dad, come to think of it.
Kano: [off] Huh.
Yukino: [off] Arima'd always kind of looked after her, you see. But
when she ran away from home she ran to me, not Arima. [beat] I wonder
why that is. I mean, Arima was the one she liked, not me. [beat] Or
Maho.
Kano: [off] Maho Isawa?
[Still of a photo (possibly on Yukino's desk) of Maho and Yukino
sitting on a bench in a shopping district, clad in warm winter clothing
and smiling, looking most comfortable together.]
Yukino: [off] Yes. You know Arima wasn't the first to figure out what I
was really like. That was Maho, and she didn't need to catch me in my
sweatsuit. [titters] She figured it out all by herself, and she was not
impressed. At all. [beat] But now she's like the big sister I never
had. It's amazing. Though one time I called her _onesan_ and she
freaked because I thought I had a crush on her.
Kano: [off; pretends to weep for joy] "_Onesan_!" [giggles]
Yukino: [off] You've no idea. She's so straight it isn't funny.
Actually Tsubaki likes to piss her off by going on about how pretty she
is, which is silly, because Maho knows Tsubaki likes guys really.
[giggles] So I just call her _onesan_ behind her back.
Kano: [off] But aren't you, like, in the same grade though?
Yukino: [off] So is Tsubasa. [laughs] You know how big a baby she is.
Maho...I dunno...she's like, way more mature than I'll ever be...
Kano: [off; unimpressed] Huh. I dunno. She just struck me as real
unsociable, is all. Real distant and stuff, like "I don't wanna be
here. These people piss me off. I don't know these people..."
Yukino: [off; in defense] She's just not very comfortable around a lot
of people. She doesn't trust a lot of people enough to be friends with
them. She doesn't really like Tsubasa and her friends much. She just
hangs out with them because I do. She doesn't trust a lot of people, so
it's really hard to get to know her real well. [beat; giggles like a
girl in love] But once you do she's really very sweet and kind. Really
understanding. That, and she's really very pretty when she wants to
be...
Kano: [off; suddenly teasing] Aw, you have a crush on Maho. It's so
cute...!
[Beat.]
Yukino: [off; thinking about that] Yeah. Yeah, maybe just a little...
[They both titter about that.]
Kano: [off; more seriously] But I guess she trusts you, huh?
Yukino: [off] Yes. Yes, I think so. I'm probably the best friend _she_
has. Her best girl friend anyway. Seriously, I can tell her stuff I
couldn't ever tell Arima. Like...
Kano: [off] Like how worried you are about him?
[Beat.]
Yukino: [off] Yes. Some of it. [beat] So you see, Arima's not the only
one I have heart-to-hearts with, because I can't tell him everything.
Actually, this is more like me and Maho.
[Cut back to the posters of Ayn Rand and Nanami.]
Kano: [off; concerned] But shouldn't you say something to him, though?
Yukino: [off; defeated] I've tried, now and again, but...it's not like
I can make him change, you know? It's not like I can say, "Make
friends! Now!" [Kano giggles, Yukino joins in; beat] So there's only so
much I can do about it, and the rest I have to deal with somehow. So
Maho's great that way. We're always talking about our men, it's not
even funny. Of course, I help her when I can, but she taught me pretty
much all I know about what's up with guys...
[Tsuwabuki sweatdrops.]
Kano: [off; nervously] Even..._that_?
Yukino: [off; all seriousness] Especially that. You have no idea. When
she found out how far me and Arima had gone she couldn't do enough to
help...
Kano: [off] How'd she...
[Nanami sweatdrops. Tsuwabuki's nose might start to bleed.]
Kano: [off; really nervously] Oh God, she didn't...
[A bulging vein appears on Ayn Rand's brow.]
Yukino: [off; irritated] No, she did _not_ walk in on us naked! Jeez,
how interesting do you think my life is anyway?
Kano: [off; apologetic, small voice] Sorry...
[Ayn Rand's vein gives way to a sweatdrop.]
Yukino: [off] Actually, it kind of came out in conversation. It was
pretty embarrassing, to tell you the truth. I actually didn't mean to
tell her.
[Cut back to the picture of Maho and Yukino.]
Yukino: [narrative] But anyway, she found out, and after that--not just
then, a few days later--she comes up to me at school and grabs me by
the shoulder and she's like, "You're coming to my house after school.
We need to talk." She wasn't asking me, she was telling me. And I'm
like, "But I've got stuff to do at school," and she's like, "Not any
more. This is a matter of life and death." So I figured something was
up, because this isn't something she does every day, so I made some
excuse and I went. And when I got there, she's like, "Okay, Miyazawa,
you're a member of the club..."
Kano: [off; not understanding] The club?
Yukino: [off] That is, I was doing it with Arima. Because she'd said,
when she found out about it, "Welcome to the club." And she's like, "If
you want to stay a member in good standing, you need to learn the
rules." And she basically spent the whole afternoon taking everything
she knew about sex and downloading it into my brain...
Kano: [off; creepily] Like how to drive your man wild in bed?
[Beat.]
Yukino: [off; completely serious] How about places around here where
kids our age can get protection without being asked too many questions?
Kano: [off; chastened] Oh. [beat; thoughtful] You know, that never even
occurred to me. [beat] At Asaba's, I mean.
[Beat.]
Yukino: [off] It didn't occur to me either.
Kano: [off; hesitant] Um...did Arima...
Yukino: [off] Yes. Fortunately he did. [beat; with more levity] You
have no idea. The guy was well prepared. He'd been planning this for
ages. [titters]
Kano: [off; giggling] Oh yeah?
Yukino: [off; more seriously] Well, no, not exactly, but he'd wanted to
for quite a while. He said so. One fine day he just blurted it out.
Kano: [off; a bit put off] Is that a fact?
Yukino: Yup. 'Course I freaked a bit, who wouldn't? [titters] And I was
a little afraid to, and I guess he could tell. He was really nice about
it, though. It's not like he was pressuring me. It was more like he was
begging me. For a sign I really did love him, I guess. [beat] That's
Arima for you. [beat] So he didn't pressure me, but that didn't mean he
didn't still want to, of course. And...I dunno...I think eventually
something inside me decided it was time. And one day in summer he asks
me back to his place, saying, really meaningfully, "Nobody else will be
there." And I went, and when I got there it just sort of happened.
[beat] He made me dinner afterwards. It was pretty nice.
Kano: [off; thinking about that] Hm.
Yukino: [off; ending her digression; narrative] Anyway, I ask her, "So,
like, what are the rules, exactly?" And she told me. [beat] And I guess
now's as good a time as any to tell you. [beat] Rule one: Never let a
guy pressure you into doing anything. Period. She said that, and I'm
like, "That's not my problem, Maho. I think he's actually kind of
afraid to. We haven't done it that many times. I've practically had to
beg him." And she's like, "Huh." And I'm like, "I don't know. I think
he thinks he'll hurt me, or we won't love each other any more, or
something." [a bit peeved] Which would be just like him. [narrative]
And I told her, "He's even afraid to be alone with me these days in
case he'll be tempted to do something perverse. His words, not mine."
Which they were. And she thinks about that, and she says, "If it were
anyone else, I'd say he's getting it somewhere else, but your man
really doesn't strike me as the cheating type." [digressing] Which was
good to hear from Maho. This is the girl who saw through me just like
that. She's a really good judge of character. So if she's never said
anything bad about Arima, that's really good, because she's said plenty
of bad things about me. To my face no less. [resumes] And I'm like, "So
what do you think it is?" And she's like, "You ever think he was maybe
having trouble getting protection and that's why he was avoiding the
situation?" Which I hadn't, and I'm like, "Oh. That could be." And I
guess I looked kind of let down, because she said, "Miyazawa, nobody
said you were wrong. Actually, if he _was_ that worried about it, I'd
be more likely to believe he really does care about you. And you and
him for that matter." [giggles] Which cheered me up. [beat] Rule two,
and I quote: "Never do it without protection. It doesn't matter who has
the job of bringing it, but one of you has to." And I'm like, "What if
you both forget?" And she's like, "The guy's pants have to stay on."
I'm like, "So, what, we have to stop?" And she gives me this look, and
she's like, "No, Miyazawa. I didn't say you couldn't make out, the
guy's pants just have to stay on." [laughs] And then she gets to the
techniques, I guess you'd say.
Kano: [off; her curiosity piqued] Which are?
Yukino: [off] Beside the point right now. [blows a raspberry]
Kano: [off; whining] Sis...!
Yukino: [off; resuming] But she tells me all this stuff, and when she's
done I'm like, "God, Maho, how do you know all this?" and I laugh and I
decide to tease her and I ask, "So, what? Did you escape from a
sultan's harem, or something?" But when I said that she gave me a
really hard look, and she's like, "Let me ask you a question, Miyazawa.
Why do you think girls in a harem learned all this stuff?" And I'm
like, "To please the sultan, I guess," and she's like, "That and to
make sure they didn't kill themselves bearing heirs to the throne just
because they'd get her heads cut off if they told him no. In those
days, they didn't have protection. So they had to distract him somehow,
so they didn't end up pregnant or catch whatever STD he happened to
have, and in those days they couldn't cure them. Point is, do it
without protection, consider yourself pregnant or worse. I'm trying to
help you here, Miyazawa. I'm not telling you all this stuff so you can
have fun with your man. This is a matter of life and death." Which was
pretty heavy stuff, and I guess she must have realized she scared me a
little, because then she just sort of smiled and said, "It is pretty
fun, though." And we both just laughed...
Kano: [off] So where _did_ she learn them?
Yukino: [off] Seriously? Found some in books. A few she just made up
all on her own. Or so she says, anyway. Some she learned from her
boyfriend. [beat; delivering a punchline] I guess they never remember
either. [laughs, with Kano joining in; beat; completely serious] But
you know, Kano...
Kano: [off] Yes?
Yukino: [off] She had a point. If you don't know what you're doing you
can get yourself in real trouble. I was really lucky. [beat] For that
matter so were you.
Kano: [off; hesitant] Um...sis...did you really think Asaba would
have...
Yukino: [off] No. I trust Asapin. I do. He wouldn't hurt you. [beat]
Lots of guys wouldn't care, though.
[Beat.]
Kano: [off] Were there other rules?
Yukino: [off] Actually, yes. She told me rule three: Never get drunk or
high when you're alone with a guy. You'll forget rules one and two.
[beat] Not that you should be drinking anyway, Kano.
Kano: [off] 'k.
Yukino: [off] Then she told me rules four and five, and I don't think I
ever saw her more serious about anything in her life. Here's rule four:
Never do it with a guy you don't love with all your heart. Which means
you've got to be absolutely sure you do before you do anything with
him. And she told me that, and let it sink in for a moment, and she
said, "So do you?" And I said, "Yes, of course," like it was nothing,
and she's like, "Not good enough. Look at me. Straight in the eye.
Don't even blink." So I did, and she's like, "Let's try this again. So
do you?" And I said, as sincerely as I could, "Yes." And she thought
about it, to figure out if I'd said it right, maybe, and then she said,
"Does he?" And I'm like, "I really shouldn't speak for..." But I never
finish, because she's like, "Yes or no." And I say, "Yes." And she
thinks about that, to figure out if I meant it, I guess, and then she's
like, "Okay. I believe you."
Kano: [off; teasing] "You may kiss the bride!"
Yukino: [off; suddenly dissolving into titters] Yeah, really!
[recovering; beat] Yeah, I suppose it was a bit like a marriage
ceremony. Which _is_ a bit freaky. I mean, think. We haven't been
dating that long...
Kano: [off; getting into this] I still say you should. And have, like,
six kids!
Yukino: [off; feigning shock] _Six_!? Jeez, I can't do that _and_ rule
the world at the same time! [laughs]
Kano: [off; creepily] I told you you'd be a great mom, you don't want
that going to waste, right?
Yukino: [off] Having Arima's kids...[reflective] Would he be a good
dad, though? That's what I'm thinking.
Kano: [off] He'd probably think they were all that, like Dad thinks we
are. [beat; more seriously] Seriously, though. Don't you think they're
a lot alike?
Yukino: [off] How?
Kano: [off] Well...I guess all Dad really had after great-grandpa died
was Mom.
Yukino: [off; contemplating that] I never thought of that. [beat] That
explains some things.
Kano: [off] So what was rule five?
Yukino: [off] Here's rule five. Never, ever, _ever_ do it with a guy
who doesn't love you back. She said that to me, and then she said, and
I'll remember this 'til the day I die: "That means: the moment it even
occurs to you that the guy would ever dream of betraying you, you dump
him like a ton of bricks. Don't let him try to win you back, don't let
him try to, quote, unquote, 'explain,' don't listen to him when he
promises to quote, unquote, 'change,' because he won't, don't listen to
a goddamn word he says. Because bastards like that know exactly what a
girl wants to hear. Best thing to do is to call him out of the blue and
say, "It's over, you piece of shit," and hang up before he says a word.
And you do whatever it takes to keep him away from you from then on,
and you tell everyone who'll listen what a scumbag he is, and maybe,
just maybe, you'll save some other poor girl from suffering because of
him." And she had this really intense look on her face as she said it.
And I'm like, "Is that necessary?" And she's like, "No, Miyazawa.
What's necessary is to cut it off and shove it down his throat until he
chokes on it. But you can get put in jail for that because there's no
justice in this world, so you'll just have to hope that's enough." And
I'm getting freaked out, and I'm like, "What if you actually still like
the guy?" And she pauses for breath, and then she says, "I know. It'll
hurt. It'll hurt a lot. But some things hurt worse, okay?" And I'm
like, "Do you really think Arima would..." And maybe she realized she
was freaking me out, because she said, "No. I'm not accusing your man
of anything. You trust him. So I trust him. Just remember this. Follow
all of those rules, and you'll avoid every single mistake I ever made."
[Beat.]
Kano: [off] Did she say what the mistakes were?
Yukino: [off] No. I tried to ask, but she's like, "Miyazawa, count
yourself lucky that I'm telling you as much as I am. My boyfriend knows
what the mistakes were, because I told him. I told you what I did
because I pray you never have to know." [beat] I still don't know. I
mean, I have my ideas, but I don't think I'll ever know for sure.
Whatever it was, I guess she took it pretty hard. [beat] But I'm
thinking she was really worried about me, and she didn't want me to get
hurt like she did.
Kano: [off] Sounds like she really cares about you.
Yukino: [off] Yes, I really think she does. And I care about her too.
[Beat.]
Kano: [off] You think maybe that's why she doesn't trust a lot of
people?
Yukino: [off] That could be. I don't know. Whatever the reason, I'm
guessing she basically trusts her boyfriend, and for some reason, me.
And that's it. [beat; suddenly conspiratorially] I'm going to tell you
a secret, okay, Kano?
Kano: [off; giggling in expectation] Okay!
Yukino: [off] Now, I told you she was straight as an arrow, and I meant
it. That said...
Kano: [off] That said, what?
[Shot from above of the left forearm of Kano, left, and the right
forearm of Yukino, right, lying side by side on the floor.]
Yukino: [off; softly] She said that, and then--it wasn't the first time
she'd done this, actually, but she's only done it a few times, and she
only does it when we're alone, and only then when she's really
emotional, so I remember it--she very gently took my hand [her hand
moves to take Kano's] and squeezed just like this...[squeezes Kano's
hand; she might rub a bit]
Kano: [off; giggling, maybe a little nervously] Oooh! Keep doing that,
_onesan_!
[Cut back to the posters of Ayn Rand and Nanami.]
Yukino: [off; giggling too] Yeah, it actually was really intense. It
was pretty far out. [in self-defense] Not quite as intense as when
Arima holds my hand or anything, I should point out. Maho doesn't turn
me on or anything...
[Nanami sweatdrops.]
Kano: [off; nervously] Oooh...kay...nobody said she did...
[End sweatdrop.]
Yukino: [off; happily] But it really is nice when she does that.
Kano: [off; suddenly creepy] Next time she does that, you should kiss
her, just to see what she does!
[Ayn Rand sweatdrops.]
Yukino: [off; giggling nervously] Oh, I don't know, Kano. What if it
turned me on? [beat] What if she kisses back?
Yukino:
[off; in unison] AAAAAAAAH!
Kano:
[Beat.]
[End sweatdrop.]
Yukino: [off; dismissive] Nah. She'd probably just kick my ass.
[They have a good titter over that.]
[Beat.]
Kano: [off] You know, Sis?
Yukino: [off] Yes?
Kano: [off] Maho doesn't sound that different from Arima at all.
Yukino: [off] No. No, I guess not.
Kano: [off] Matter of fact, Sis...they're all like him.
Yukino: [off; curious] Who are?
Kano: [off] Maho and Tsubasa and Asaba. They're all kind of lonely
sorts of people.
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from her right
profile as she looks towards the camera (i.e. at Kano). Her eyes
suddenly widen, as if she had had an epiphany.]
Yukino: Thank you, Kano.
[Shot from the floor of Kano's head and upper torso from her left
profile as she looks towards the camera (i.e. at Yukino). She seems
confused.]
Kano: What'd I say?
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from her right
profile. She turns towards the ceiling.]
Yukino: Now I know. Some way, somehow, I must just attract that sort of
person. [laughs sadly] And then poor Mom has to put them up for the
night...
[Shot from the floor of Kano's head and upper torso from her left
profile, still looking at Yukino.]
Kano: [off] I don't think she minds, really...
Yukino: [off] That's not the point. Why me? Why now? This never
happened before...
[Kano suddenly smiles, reassuringly.]
Kano: It might just be, Sis, because they know they can trust you...
[Shot from above of Kano's and Tsukino's hands, still clasped. Kano
squeezes back.]
Kano: [off] ...because whatever you were before, you really are a
loving and caring person now. I didn't believe it before, but I know it
now.
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from her right
profile, as she looks up.]
Yukino: I don't know. You can't be everybody's big sister. Not really.
Kano: [off] But just a few people's okay, right? I mean, they're your
friends, right? [beat] Besides, they look after you too.
Yukino: [smiling for a moment; reassured] It beats having no friends at
all, I'll give you that.
[Yukino turns back towards Kano, suddenly very serious, a bit worried.]
[Shot from above of Kano's and Yukino's hands, still clasped. Yukino
slowly extricates herself from Kano's grip.]
Yukino: [off] Those lonely people. Do they include you?
[Shot from the floor of Kano's head and upper torso from her left
profile, still looking at Yukino. Her smile has dissolved; her eyes
widen a little.]
Kano: What?
Yukino: [off] Kano. I don't want you to depend just on me. I don't want
you worshipping the ground I walk on. I don't want you to do that to
me. I don't want you to do that to yourself. I want you to promise me
you won't do that.
Kano: But...
Yukino: [off] Promise me!
[Beat.]
Kano: I promise. [beat] Are you mad?
[Shot from the floor of Yukino's head and upper torso from her right
profile. Her expression has softened. She might shake her head a
little.]
Yukino: No. [beat; smiles sadly; apologetic] I just don't want you to
end up like Arima. Life's too short. [tenderly] Okay?
[Shot from the floor of Kano's head and upper torso from her left
profile, still looking at Yukino. She nods.]
Kano: Okay. [suddenly smiling] We need to do this more often.
[Cut back to the posters of Ayn Rand and Nanami.]
Yukino: [off; lighter] Yeah, this is pretty fun, actually.
Kano: [off] You need to do it with Tsukino, too.
[Ayn Rand sweatdrops.]
Yukino: [off] Well, unless there's a crisis, it's hard to get around to
doing it.
Kano: [off] Well, she'll need to know how to survive in high school,
pretty soon.
[End sweatdrop.]
Yukino: [off] Point. [beat; laughs] At least I won't fall to pieces
over that!
Kano: [off] Yeah, that's good to know! [beat] My point is, though, it
doesn't have to be a crisis. Just...I dunno...take her problems more
seriously. Help her deal with them and stuff. Let her know you're
there.
Yukino: [off] That sounds like a plan.
[Beat.]
Kano: [off] Where _is_ Tsukino, anyway? She should have come up long
ago.
Yukino: [off] Well, I told her we were both sick, so she's
probably still studying downstairs so we can sleep. [beat] Which is
nice of her.
[SFX: Kano's stomach growls.]
[Beat.]
Yukino: [off; endearingly] You should eat before you go to sleep.
Kano: [off] Hm.
[Shot from above of Kano lying on the floor next to Yukino. She sits up
and inspects her uniform.]
Kano: Should probably change too. Can't really sleep in this.
[Cut back to the posters of Ayn Rand and Nanami.]
Kano: [off] Mind if I turn the light on?
Yukino: [off] No, go ahead.
[SFX: The light switch clicking.]
[The light comes on, with color being restored to the posters.]
Kano: [off] Say, Sis...
Yukino: [off] What?
[Close up on the Nanami poster.]
Kano: [off] Do you want me to take down the Nanami poster?
[Shot from slightly above (from, say, Kano's height) of the left
profile of Yukino from the waist up, sitting up in bed. She turns
towards the camera to look at the poster. She smiles.]
Yukino: You don't have to on my account. Nanami's got style...
Kano: [off] I dunno.
[Front view of the head and shoulders of Kano, still in her uniform,
looking at the poster.]
Kano: I was just thinking she's not really what I'm all about any more.
[White screen.]
[Caption: TSUZUKU]