Chapter 16
Amor vincit omnia et nos cedamus amori.
Love conquers all and let us yield to love.
(Vergil, Eclogae)
That night, Julian gave himself 20cc's of a telepathy drug. A wave a dizziness passed over
him a few minutes later. He called up the current visual logs. Vicki Ann was getting ready
for bed. He waited until she was asleep for a little while. Then, he concentrated on the
thought while at the same time, thinking of her. Vicki Ann had told him that if you
concentrated too hard on actually sending the thought, it did more harm than good. He
sent her a thought she wasn't likely to forget: the two of them using Julian's spy program
in the Holosuite. After about fifteen minutes, Julian decided that it had to be enough.
Besides, the drugs would be wearing off soon; they weren't very long-lasting. He didn't
think he could handle another dose. His head was spinning and his stomach was doing
somersaults as it was. He crawled into bed and hoped with all his heart and soul that it
had worked.
Vicki Ann woke up and shook her head. She'd dreamt about Julian again. Only this time,
she remembered it. She'd dreamt about the time they used his spy program in the
Holosuite. How strange. Why would I dream of that? She shrugged it off and began to
get ready. Keiko had invited her over for breakfast before her shift.
The door chime rang in the O'Brien's temporary quarters. Keiko, who was setting the table,
said to her daughter, "Molly, why don't you be a good girl and answer the door for
mommy?"
Molly, eager to help, ran to answer the door and almost knocked over her father, who was
coming out of the bedroom.
"Watch where you're going, Molly," he scolded.
"I have to answer the door," she replied, running again for the door. She opened the door.
The door opened and when Vicki Ann saw no one in front of her, she looked down. "Hello,
Molly," she said, forcing a smile. "How are you today?"
Molly beamed. "I'm good, Dr. Troi. How are you?"
"I'm fine, Molly. Thanks for asking," Vicki Ann replied, lying through her teeth. "And call me
Vicki Ann. Dr. Troi sounds so formal."
She made a face to express her disapproval at the title.
Molly giggled.
"Come on in, Vicki Ann," O'Brien called.
Vicki Ann obeyed. She went over to the table and began to help Keiko.
"You don't have to do that, Vicki Ann. You're a guest," Keiko told her.
"That's alright, Keiko. It's fine. I just like to keep busy, that's all," Vicki Ann replied.
Keiko nodded knowingly. "I'll bet it helps to keep your mind of things." When Vicki Ann
nodded, Keiko added, "But you can't hide from your feelings forever. You'll have to deal
with your grief eventually."
"I know. Just not right now. Ezri's a mess and I can't help her if I'm just as bad."
"How is she?" O'Brien asked.
Vicki Ann shook her head. "Not good. She's alternating between denial and crying
hysterically. She's been seeing Deanna almost constantly. Kira's orders. I'm not sure if it's
helping, though. Because if she's in the denial phase while she's talking to Deanna, I'm sure
all she talks about is how Julian is just staying longer on Cardassia and is coming home
soon."
O'Brien shook his head sadly. "This couldn't have happened at a worse time. She and Julian
just got together. You know, Worf said that Ezri had feelings for Julian a month before she
told him. Julian knew about his feelings for a while too, before he told her. Who knows?
Maybe Julian would have gotten over his fear of commitment and they would have gotten
married."
Vicki Ann nodded. "Yes, but can you imagine how Ezri would have felt if she hadn't told
Julian and this happened? At least he knew how much she loved him."
They sat down at the table and began to eat. Everyone was quiet during the meal, except
Molly, who told Vicki Ann all about her new school on Earth. They had a few weeks off and
that's how she had been able to come back to the station. Vicki Ann smiled and nodded at
Molly's monologue. When they finished, O'Brien said to Molly, "Why don't you go play with
your brother?" This gave the adults the opportunity to talk without Molly hearing.
"Seriously, Vicki Ann. How are you doing?" Keiko asked.
Vicki Ann shrugged. "Sometimes I'm fine. Then, I do or see something that reminds me of
Julian. It's kind of like when Jadzia died. There is one strange thing happening this time,
though."
"What's that?" asked O'Brien.
"I've been dreaming about Julian, but when I wake up, I don't remember any details.
Except this morning. Last night, I remember dreaming about his spy program."
O'Brien chuckled. "Julian Bashir, Secret Agent for Great Britain."
Vicki Ann nodded. "Exactly. Do you remember the time Quark, Deanna and Will set us up
and put us in the same Holosuite? That's what I dreamed about."
O'Brien remembered. The two of them had fought and broken up. Quark, Riker and Deanna
had conspired to get them back together by placing them in the same Holosuite and saying
that there was a character that looked like the other. It had worked. They admitted that
they still had feelings for each other and worked out their problem. "That's strange, that
you didn't remember any night but last night."
"That's what I thought. I don't know. Maybe the other dreams were painful in some way
and my subconscious was trying to protect me by preventing me from remembering."
"Where this is a happy memory and therefore, you would remember it," Keiko added.
Well, I don't know if I would call it 'happy.' Lately, any memory of Julian is painful. "I
don't know. Maybe I should talk to Deanna and see what she thinks."
"Good idea," O'Brien replied.
"Well, I have to get the infirmary. Thanks for breakfast. I'll see you later. Bye, Molly. Bye,
Yoshi," she said, waving to the two children.
Julian Bashir could barely contain his excitement when he heard Vicki Ann describe her
dream to Miles. It had worked. He'd have to try again tonight. There was one problem,
though. He couldn't use these drugs more than two or three times, or he'd develop serious
side effects. And he couldn't do anything major, either. It would have to be simple. He'd
have to somehow get Vicki Ann to figure out that it wasn't him that had died, but his
clone. The question was how.
That night, Vicki Ann decided to try some relaxation techniques to forget her troubles. She
took a long, hot shower, lit some aromatherapy oil, and put on some of the jazz that Will
had given her for her birthday. She let herself get lost in the intoxicating rhythm of the
music and breathed deeply to let the scent of the oil relax her senses. It worked. She
relaxed and was able to fall asleep. Unfortunately, her troubles returned in her dreams.
The next morning, Vicki Ann sighed when she woke up. She'd dreamt of Julian again. This
time he was working in the infirmary. He was looking at the brain scans from his DNA
pattern that he'd detected in her quarters. Suddenly, Vicki Ann had a hunch. She hurried
up, got dressed, and ran to the infirmary without eating breakfast.
Vicki Ann charged into the infirmary.
"Dr. Troi, is everything alright?" asked one of the nurses.
"Yes, everything's fine," she replied. "I just have some tests to run and I'd like it if I wasn't
disturbed. Unless of course, it's an emergency."
The nurse nodded and Vicki Ann went into Julian's office. After hours of searching, she
found what she wanted. She called up the brain scans from when Julian died and
compared them to the one Julian detected. Her eyes told her that they were identical.
Genetically engineered or not, she wanted to be sure. "Computer, compare brain pattern A
to brain pattern B."
"Pattern A is an exact match to pattern B," replied the computer.
"Compare both patterns to Dr. Julian Bashir's pattern from last year's physical."
"Patterns A and B shows a slight genetic drift and shows exposure to tricolate and
dethacol."
Vicki Ann's jaw dropped. She had been right. Julian hadn't died on the Defiant. She tapped
her comm badge. "Troi to Kira. Can you come to the infirmary? We have a problem."
"What's going on?" Kira asked, yawning, as she entered Julian's office.
"Sit down," Vicki Ann said, motioning to Julian's chair. Kira obeyed. "This may come as
quite a shock."
"What is it, Vicki Ann?" Kira asked, worried.
Vicki Ann sighed. "Julian's not dead."
"What?"
"Julian's not dead. Our Julian anyway."
Kira stood and walked over to Vicki Ann. "Oh no, Vicki Ann, don't you go on me, too. I
need someone to keep their head on around here," she said, putting her hands on Vicki
Ann's shoulders.
"Nerys, I'm not crazy. I'm serious. The Julian that died on the Defiant was the Section 31
clone that helped to abduct me."
"Vicki Ann-"
"I have the pattern right here." She showed the patterns to Kira.
"By the Prophets. You're right."
"What are you going to do about it?"
"I'll tell Starfleet Headquarters."
"And?"
"That's all I can do."
"What?" If Section 31 has Julian, he's in danger. We have to find him!"
"I'm sorry, but we can't."
"You're just going to desert him When he needs you the most? Some friend you are!"
"Doctor! That is enough. This conversation is over."
Julian watched as Vicki Ann and Kira argued about his rescue. He understood Kira's point.
They had no idea where he was. He had to figure out tell Vicki Ann where he was. That
night, he sent her another message, giving her the coordinates of the station where he
was. He'd hacked into the computer. They were in code, but it didn't take him long to
figure it out. He was so exhausted by the time he finished, he fell asleep in his uniform.
Vicki Ann woke up. She had an idea where Julian was. She had no idea how, but she did.
She had to go look. She dressed and ran to the docking bay.
Colonel Kira sat at her desk and was looking over the security reports. She heard the door
chime. "Come in." One of the infirmary nurses entered.
"Sir, Dr. Troi hasn't reported in yet."
Kira looked at the chronometer. It was 0930 and Vicki Ann was usually there at 0800
sharp. "Computer, where is Dr. Troi?"
"Dr. Troi is not aboard the station."
"What was her last know location?"
"Runabout pad three."
"Damn." Kira turned to the nurse. "I'll talk to Dr. Crusher and see if she can fill in. Until
then, let's hope nobody gets hurt."
Julian Bashir had slept in. Probably because he was worn out from his telepathic
communication with Vicki Ann. He saw a figure in his room again. "Sid."
Sid walked over to him. "Yes, doctor. It's me. And this time, I've brought some friends."
The lights flashed on revealing two large men. "You're getting some new accommodations
doctor."
The two men grabbed Julian and dragged him, kicking and screaming, to the prison cell he
had originally awakened in.
"This is for breaking into the computer system last night to get the coordinates of the
station."
"How could I tell anyone? I can't send any messages."
"That's not the point, doctor. You shouldn't have done it. And now you are going to pay
for your mistake."
Amor vincit omnia et nos cedamus amori.
Love conquers all and let us yield to love.
(Vergil, Eclogae)
That night, Julian gave himself 20cc's of a telepathy drug. A wave a dizziness passed over
him a few minutes later. He called up the current visual logs. Vicki Ann was getting ready
for bed. He waited until she was asleep for a little while. Then, he concentrated on the
thought while at the same time, thinking of her. Vicki Ann had told him that if you
concentrated too hard on actually sending the thought, it did more harm than good. He
sent her a thought she wasn't likely to forget: the two of them using Julian's spy program
in the Holosuite. After about fifteen minutes, Julian decided that it had to be enough.
Besides, the drugs would be wearing off soon; they weren't very long-lasting. He didn't
think he could handle another dose. His head was spinning and his stomach was doing
somersaults as it was. He crawled into bed and hoped with all his heart and soul that it
had worked.
Vicki Ann woke up and shook her head. She'd dreamt about Julian again. Only this time,
she remembered it. She'd dreamt about the time they used his spy program in the
Holosuite. How strange. Why would I dream of that? She shrugged it off and began to
get ready. Keiko had invited her over for breakfast before her shift.
The door chime rang in the O'Brien's temporary quarters. Keiko, who was setting the table,
said to her daughter, "Molly, why don't you be a good girl and answer the door for
mommy?"
Molly, eager to help, ran to answer the door and almost knocked over her father, who was
coming out of the bedroom.
"Watch where you're going, Molly," he scolded.
"I have to answer the door," she replied, running again for the door. She opened the door.
The door opened and when Vicki Ann saw no one in front of her, she looked down. "Hello,
Molly," she said, forcing a smile. "How are you today?"
Molly beamed. "I'm good, Dr. Troi. How are you?"
"I'm fine, Molly. Thanks for asking," Vicki Ann replied, lying through her teeth. "And call me
Vicki Ann. Dr. Troi sounds so formal."
She made a face to express her disapproval at the title.
Molly giggled.
"Come on in, Vicki Ann," O'Brien called.
Vicki Ann obeyed. She went over to the table and began to help Keiko.
"You don't have to do that, Vicki Ann. You're a guest," Keiko told her.
"That's alright, Keiko. It's fine. I just like to keep busy, that's all," Vicki Ann replied.
Keiko nodded knowingly. "I'll bet it helps to keep your mind of things." When Vicki Ann
nodded, Keiko added, "But you can't hide from your feelings forever. You'll have to deal
with your grief eventually."
"I know. Just not right now. Ezri's a mess and I can't help her if I'm just as bad."
"How is she?" O'Brien asked.
Vicki Ann shook her head. "Not good. She's alternating between denial and crying
hysterically. She's been seeing Deanna almost constantly. Kira's orders. I'm not sure if it's
helping, though. Because if she's in the denial phase while she's talking to Deanna, I'm sure
all she talks about is how Julian is just staying longer on Cardassia and is coming home
soon."
O'Brien shook his head sadly. "This couldn't have happened at a worse time. She and Julian
just got together. You know, Worf said that Ezri had feelings for Julian a month before she
told him. Julian knew about his feelings for a while too, before he told her. Who knows?
Maybe Julian would have gotten over his fear of commitment and they would have gotten
married."
Vicki Ann nodded. "Yes, but can you imagine how Ezri would have felt if she hadn't told
Julian and this happened? At least he knew how much she loved him."
They sat down at the table and began to eat. Everyone was quiet during the meal, except
Molly, who told Vicki Ann all about her new school on Earth. They had a few weeks off and
that's how she had been able to come back to the station. Vicki Ann smiled and nodded at
Molly's monologue. When they finished, O'Brien said to Molly, "Why don't you go play with
your brother?" This gave the adults the opportunity to talk without Molly hearing.
"Seriously, Vicki Ann. How are you doing?" Keiko asked.
Vicki Ann shrugged. "Sometimes I'm fine. Then, I do or see something that reminds me of
Julian. It's kind of like when Jadzia died. There is one strange thing happening this time,
though."
"What's that?" asked O'Brien.
"I've been dreaming about Julian, but when I wake up, I don't remember any details.
Except this morning. Last night, I remember dreaming about his spy program."
O'Brien chuckled. "Julian Bashir, Secret Agent for Great Britain."
Vicki Ann nodded. "Exactly. Do you remember the time Quark, Deanna and Will set us up
and put us in the same Holosuite? That's what I dreamed about."
O'Brien remembered. The two of them had fought and broken up. Quark, Riker and Deanna
had conspired to get them back together by placing them in the same Holosuite and saying
that there was a character that looked like the other. It had worked. They admitted that
they still had feelings for each other and worked out their problem. "That's strange, that
you didn't remember any night but last night."
"That's what I thought. I don't know. Maybe the other dreams were painful in some way
and my subconscious was trying to protect me by preventing me from remembering."
"Where this is a happy memory and therefore, you would remember it," Keiko added.
Well, I don't know if I would call it 'happy.' Lately, any memory of Julian is painful. "I
don't know. Maybe I should talk to Deanna and see what she thinks."
"Good idea," O'Brien replied.
"Well, I have to get the infirmary. Thanks for breakfast. I'll see you later. Bye, Molly. Bye,
Yoshi," she said, waving to the two children.
Julian Bashir could barely contain his excitement when he heard Vicki Ann describe her
dream to Miles. It had worked. He'd have to try again tonight. There was one problem,
though. He couldn't use these drugs more than two or three times, or he'd develop serious
side effects. And he couldn't do anything major, either. It would have to be simple. He'd
have to somehow get Vicki Ann to figure out that it wasn't him that had died, but his
clone. The question was how.
That night, Vicki Ann decided to try some relaxation techniques to forget her troubles. She
took a long, hot shower, lit some aromatherapy oil, and put on some of the jazz that Will
had given her for her birthday. She let herself get lost in the intoxicating rhythm of the
music and breathed deeply to let the scent of the oil relax her senses. It worked. She
relaxed and was able to fall asleep. Unfortunately, her troubles returned in her dreams.
The next morning, Vicki Ann sighed when she woke up. She'd dreamt of Julian again. This
time he was working in the infirmary. He was looking at the brain scans from his DNA
pattern that he'd detected in her quarters. Suddenly, Vicki Ann had a hunch. She hurried
up, got dressed, and ran to the infirmary without eating breakfast.
Vicki Ann charged into the infirmary.
"Dr. Troi, is everything alright?" asked one of the nurses.
"Yes, everything's fine," she replied. "I just have some tests to run and I'd like it if I wasn't
disturbed. Unless of course, it's an emergency."
The nurse nodded and Vicki Ann went into Julian's office. After hours of searching, she
found what she wanted. She called up the brain scans from when Julian died and
compared them to the one Julian detected. Her eyes told her that they were identical.
Genetically engineered or not, she wanted to be sure. "Computer, compare brain pattern A
to brain pattern B."
"Pattern A is an exact match to pattern B," replied the computer.
"Compare both patterns to Dr. Julian Bashir's pattern from last year's physical."
"Patterns A and B shows a slight genetic drift and shows exposure to tricolate and
dethacol."
Vicki Ann's jaw dropped. She had been right. Julian hadn't died on the Defiant. She tapped
her comm badge. "Troi to Kira. Can you come to the infirmary? We have a problem."
"What's going on?" Kira asked, yawning, as she entered Julian's office.
"Sit down," Vicki Ann said, motioning to Julian's chair. Kira obeyed. "This may come as
quite a shock."
"What is it, Vicki Ann?" Kira asked, worried.
Vicki Ann sighed. "Julian's not dead."
"What?"
"Julian's not dead. Our Julian anyway."
Kira stood and walked over to Vicki Ann. "Oh no, Vicki Ann, don't you go on me, too. I
need someone to keep their head on around here," she said, putting her hands on Vicki
Ann's shoulders.
"Nerys, I'm not crazy. I'm serious. The Julian that died on the Defiant was the Section 31
clone that helped to abduct me."
"Vicki Ann-"
"I have the pattern right here." She showed the patterns to Kira.
"By the Prophets. You're right."
"What are you going to do about it?"
"I'll tell Starfleet Headquarters."
"And?"
"That's all I can do."
"What?" If Section 31 has Julian, he's in danger. We have to find him!"
"I'm sorry, but we can't."
"You're just going to desert him When he needs you the most? Some friend you are!"
"Doctor! That is enough. This conversation is over."
Julian watched as Vicki Ann and Kira argued about his rescue. He understood Kira's point.
They had no idea where he was. He had to figure out tell Vicki Ann where he was. That
night, he sent her another message, giving her the coordinates of the station where he
was. He'd hacked into the computer. They were in code, but it didn't take him long to
figure it out. He was so exhausted by the time he finished, he fell asleep in his uniform.
Vicki Ann woke up. She had an idea where Julian was. She had no idea how, but she did.
She had to go look. She dressed and ran to the docking bay.
Colonel Kira sat at her desk and was looking over the security reports. She heard the door
chime. "Come in." One of the infirmary nurses entered.
"Sir, Dr. Troi hasn't reported in yet."
Kira looked at the chronometer. It was 0930 and Vicki Ann was usually there at 0800
sharp. "Computer, where is Dr. Troi?"
"Dr. Troi is not aboard the station."
"What was her last know location?"
"Runabout pad three."
"Damn." Kira turned to the nurse. "I'll talk to Dr. Crusher and see if she can fill in. Until
then, let's hope nobody gets hurt."
Julian Bashir had slept in. Probably because he was worn out from his telepathic
communication with Vicki Ann. He saw a figure in his room again. "Sid."
Sid walked over to him. "Yes, doctor. It's me. And this time, I've brought some friends."
The lights flashed on revealing two large men. "You're getting some new accommodations
doctor."
The two men grabbed Julian and dragged him, kicking and screaming, to the prison cell he
had originally awakened in.
"This is for breaking into the computer system last night to get the coordinates of the
station."
"How could I tell anyone? I can't send any messages."
"That's not the point, doctor. You shouldn't have done it. And now you are going to pay
for your mistake."