Chapter 5
"Come on the Giles!" Buffy shrieked with delight as the waves crashed around her feet. Giles smiled and proceeded to remove his shoes and socks. He joined her at the water's edge. Buffy continued to dance around in the water, occasionally kicking water up at Giles. He playfully chased her, threatening to throw her into the ocean.
This had been the normal routine for the last week – wake up, go to the beach, return to Buffy's house, watch television, have meals in between, and then go to bed. Usually on the way back from the beach, Giles would stop at his house to pick up some clothes. He had continued sleeping with Buffy, as she still didn't want to be alone.
But when is she going to want to see anyone else? he thought to himself as they drove away from the beach in silence.
Buffy looked out the passenger door window in silence.
"Buffy?" Giles asked quietly.
She turned to look at him. "Yes Giles?" she answered.
"I-I-I think," he stammered. "I-I mean. Perhaps we could give Willow a call this evening and have her over for a visit."
Buffy looked at Giles for a few seconds before responding. "I don't think so, not tonight," she said. "I'm a little tired."
Giles knew she wasn't being honest. He pushed a little more. "Buffy, Willow wants to see you. She's worried about you. Couldn't we-"
"I said no Giles!" Buffy raised her voice a bit.
"Alright," Giles relented.
The remainder of the car ride was silent.
*****
Another week had passed and no change. Giles was at the end of his rope. She's not getting better. he feared. He was sitting in the living room of Buffy's house while she was in the shower.
She had avoided the issue of settling her parents' affairs. She had made excuses for not talking to her friends. She had even put a slight wall up between herself and Giles. This was something that worried Giles. He felt helpless and afraid. He wasn't sure what to do.
*****
As Buffy stood in the shower, the water spraying her back, she cried. This was the only place were she would let herself go. The only place she would mourn for her parents, for Faith, and for Angel.
Mom. Dad. She cried softly. Just when things looked good for them. Just when it seemed that they may reunite. They were taken from her. A little bit of herself died that night.
Faith. She leaned against the wall in the shower. A Slayer like herself. She chose the path of darkness, and it cost her her life. Buffy still couldn't overcome the guilt she felt over taking the other girl's life (although Giles and the Watcher's Council agreed that she wasn't in the right frame of mind when the events transpired).
Angel. Her legs gave out and she sat down in the shower, tucked her knees up to her chest and embraced them. Her sobs got louder. She and Angel had decided to break things off. He was supposed to leave for Los Angeles after the Ascension. But that wasn't meant to be.
But what bothered her most - what filled her with so much guilt and anguish - was the fact that she was relieved. The one emotion that was stronger than her grief was relief. Relief that the one that had survived was Giles.
" Giles," she said the name reverently. She didn't know what she would do without him. She had no doubts that she had survived this long as the Slayer because of him. He was her teacher, mentor, friend, and confidante. The feelings that he stirred inside her were strong. But he won't ever seem me as anything more than his daughter she thought.
Buffy was more confused than ever.
She wept for some time before she composed herself. She finished showering and then got ready to spend the rest of the evening with Giles on the couch.
"Come on the Giles!" Buffy shrieked with delight as the waves crashed around her feet. Giles smiled and proceeded to remove his shoes and socks. He joined her at the water's edge. Buffy continued to dance around in the water, occasionally kicking water up at Giles. He playfully chased her, threatening to throw her into the ocean.
This had been the normal routine for the last week – wake up, go to the beach, return to Buffy's house, watch television, have meals in between, and then go to bed. Usually on the way back from the beach, Giles would stop at his house to pick up some clothes. He had continued sleeping with Buffy, as she still didn't want to be alone.
But when is she going to want to see anyone else? he thought to himself as they drove away from the beach in silence.
Buffy looked out the passenger door window in silence.
"Buffy?" Giles asked quietly.
She turned to look at him. "Yes Giles?" she answered.
"I-I-I think," he stammered. "I-I mean. Perhaps we could give Willow a call this evening and have her over for a visit."
Buffy looked at Giles for a few seconds before responding. "I don't think so, not tonight," she said. "I'm a little tired."
Giles knew she wasn't being honest. He pushed a little more. "Buffy, Willow wants to see you. She's worried about you. Couldn't we-"
"I said no Giles!" Buffy raised her voice a bit.
"Alright," Giles relented.
The remainder of the car ride was silent.
*****
Another week had passed and no change. Giles was at the end of his rope. She's not getting better. he feared. He was sitting in the living room of Buffy's house while she was in the shower.
She had avoided the issue of settling her parents' affairs. She had made excuses for not talking to her friends. She had even put a slight wall up between herself and Giles. This was something that worried Giles. He felt helpless and afraid. He wasn't sure what to do.
*****
As Buffy stood in the shower, the water spraying her back, she cried. This was the only place were she would let herself go. The only place she would mourn for her parents, for Faith, and for Angel.
Mom. Dad. She cried softly. Just when things looked good for them. Just when it seemed that they may reunite. They were taken from her. A little bit of herself died that night.
Faith. She leaned against the wall in the shower. A Slayer like herself. She chose the path of darkness, and it cost her her life. Buffy still couldn't overcome the guilt she felt over taking the other girl's life (although Giles and the Watcher's Council agreed that she wasn't in the right frame of mind when the events transpired).
Angel. Her legs gave out and she sat down in the shower, tucked her knees up to her chest and embraced them. Her sobs got louder. She and Angel had decided to break things off. He was supposed to leave for Los Angeles after the Ascension. But that wasn't meant to be.
But what bothered her most - what filled her with so much guilt and anguish - was the fact that she was relieved. The one emotion that was stronger than her grief was relief. Relief that the one that had survived was Giles.
" Giles," she said the name reverently. She didn't know what she would do without him. She had no doubts that she had survived this long as the Slayer because of him. He was her teacher, mentor, friend, and confidante. The feelings that he stirred inside her were strong. But he won't ever seem me as anything more than his daughter she thought.
Buffy was more confused than ever.
She wept for some time before she composed herself. She finished showering and then got ready to spend the rest of the evening with Giles on the couch.