Sharing The Secret
Pt. 3 - A life without laughter
Dot staggered back as though she'd been slapped in the face. "Raped, oh god how awful!" She thought to herself."no wonder..."
Bob's remaining composure crumbled and he was left bawling. Dot put an arm around his neck hoping , that it would give her friend some small comfort.
Bob leaned into the embrace this time, letting his tears splash on her shoulder. It felt good to be held by her, he felt like a weight had been lifted from his chest, in sharing his secret he no longer had to face it alone.
But there was still the defilement of his body. The shame that he had been powerless to stop it hung over him , like a dark cloud enveloping the horizon.
"I'm sorry" he moaned his small frame shaking as Dot rocked his head on her shoulder "I'm...s..s..so.sss..s.sorry .y.y"
"Shhhh" Dot comforted."Your not alone anymore, Bob... I will never let you go again"Dot whispered her own tears mixing with his. They stayed by each others side for almost an hour. Dot listened quietly as Bob told her about his assault, trying her hardest to keep from crying out at the sheer inhumanity of it, and giving sympathy every time Bob broke down.
"I don't deserve you, " Bob said softly " I wasn't strong enough to stop them...It..
"Hush" Dot said. Bob moved away , his back facing her he looked to the floor " It's my own fault... I earned it"Bob started to shake once again "I failed everyone in mainframe, I got what I deserved"
Dot couldn't believe what she was hearing from him, Bob believed he had let them down. And what's more, he had justified the assault to him as being a due punishment, something he felt he deserved.
"No!" Dot said sharply ,taking Bob's face in her hands, he kept his eyes to the ground "look at me!!....don't ever say that!! She pleaded her voice wavering " you are nobodies property!!!!" Bob began to cry lightly again , and Dot pulled him back into her embrace "nobody deserves to be raped " she thought to herself
Bob's crying eventually ceased and Dot slipped out, as soon as he had drifted off.
She walked out of the room and slumped to the floor fresh tears falling down her cheeks. So many emotions roiled inside her at once, sadness for Bob, anger and disgust at his attackers, and fear for not knowing what the outcome of this tragedy would be. She let all of them wash over her. Waves of sadness, fear, and unknowing mixed into a noxious brew in her guts, Dot took a couple of shaky breaths before walking slowly down the hall, she had to face the others.
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Andria looked up and smiled at Mouse and Ray who had returned from the café. They sat down opposite to her.
"Has there been any word, Hon?" Moused asked her
"I'm afraid not" Andria said, " I asked the doctor about him, they said he would recover without much physical scarring."
"What !" Mouse snorted "who cares about the physical aspect of this, I want ta know why Bob tried to delete himself, why he went berserk when Matrix touched him, why.....
She looked up to see Dot standing a few feet away, Mouse read the look on her face in seconds, raising an eyebrow at her, Dot nodded and buried her face in her hands. She walked over and collapsed on the couch. Mouse and Andria sat beside her offering their support.
"It's bad isn't it?" Matrix asked coming in from the entrance. Dot nodded again as she told them.
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"Pain so much pain"he thought as he fell back against the wall.
Bob shivered, his legs had gone numb, and he was ice cold. He huddled against the stone wall trying to keep warm, gazing down in horror, a small cry escaped his lips at the trail of his own blood staining the floor.
Bob reached down and touched his thigh, his hand came up covered in warm red liquid. Dread filled him, the blood wasn't stopping....he was going to bleed to death......he was going to die!!!
Bob's eyes popped open and he shot up in bed, gasping. He looked around him, he was in the principal office, he.. he was alive. Bob took several deep shuddering breaths trying to calm his racing heart, he whimpered as he flopped back down on the cot, burying his face in his hands."User, make it stop"he said to himself.
Bob let his hands drop down at his sides, and he stared at the ceiling. Despite the wild raging in his heart he didn't cry out or scream. Not because he didn't want to, but quite simply he couldn't.
He was drained both physically and mentally.
He struggled to stay awake, but his eyelids felt heavy "Dot " He cried before succumbing to his nightmares, as they once again consumed him into darkness.
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"Here you go miss" a nurse smiled handing a patient her medication. The patient grinned and went to her room.
"Five more minutes" the nurse sighed looking at her watch.
"Good bye Gloria" a doctor called
"Good bye Dr. Jay" she called back, then smiled again . It had been a very peaceful day.
"WHAT!!!.......I'LL KILL THEM !!!!
A deep voice boomed through the corridors.
"Oh my" the nurse said to herself "so much for being peaceful"
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Right now being peaceful was the furthest thing from Matrix's mind, he could be heard in the entire medical section of the principle office bellowing at the top of his lungs.
"I'LL MURDER THEM...I'LL BREAK EVERY BONE IN THEIR FUCKING BODIES....!!!"
"Matrix!!" Andria cried
"FRISKET AND I'LL RIP THEM APART.....WE'LL TEAR THEM TO PIECES....WE'LL....."
He stopped when he saw Dot looking at him.
"Dot I'm sorry I.."
"I know Enzo" she said
Matrix hung his head and sat on the far end of the sofa his back to everyone, they left him alone for now.
"So what do we do now?" Mouse asked
"Now we wait" Dot replied
The next twenty minutes were spent in silence, the air was thick enough to cut. Finally when it seemed like Dot was going to loose it, the doctor appeared." Please come this way" he said
Mouse, Ray, Dot and Andria started towards the office the doctor pointed to.
Matrix stayed still, as though he hadn't heard the doctor call them. Dot gave Andria a nod and walked over to her brother.
"Matrix?" she asked
"I should have seen something was wrong..." he said
"Enzo.."
"I should have stopped it from happening"
"Enzo, you weren't with him, you couldn't have hel..."
"Then I never should have let Bob get thrown into the web" he said his voice rising " I let him down, I let you down. I'm a failure "
Dot's brows lowered with determination "look, you have let nobody down..,you survived the web, you saved the system,... found Bob,... defeated Megabyte....oh Enzo, how many times must the rebel prove himself a hero before he believes it himself....."
Matrix looked up at her with a small smile "thanks Dot" he said as she got up to leave
A moment later, he stood up , and walked beside her, she gave him a smile " Change of heart?" she asked
"I think this rebel needs to prove himself one more time.."
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They all listened as the doctor gave his prognosis.
"The assault seems to have defeated him" he said gravely " he has no wish to exist. And if he doesn't try to live, try to fight back, he may slip into a depression so deep, he won't be able to escape even if he wants to."
The room was silent, Matrix and Andria exchanged horrified expressions, Ray shook his head slowly "terrible mate"
"Bob will get back on his feet" Mouse said strongly " I know him, he likes to win,...he loves to win."
Dot nodded, she hoped that Mouse was right.
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Bob was sleeping when they entered the room. The sun was setting on Mainframe, casting the room in an eerie orange glow.
Dot walked over to his side and stroked the damp hair. "Bob.." she whispered, taking one of the limp hands she ran her thumb over the knuckles.
Matrix came to stand beside her, he wrapped an arm around her neck, and smiled at her, before looking at Bob.
Bob had always been his hero and friend, he was someone to goof off with, to confide in, someone who was always there to catch him when he fell....
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It was raining hard and Enzo was cold, lost, and hungry. He glanced around him level 31 was no place for a small sprite to be at this hour. He sniffed, as he sat on a bench, things hadn't gone as he had hoped. He had wanted to be a magician (this week anyway) and had performed his tricks all over mainframe, for the better part of the day. But most people had barley favored him with a glance. With a heavy heart he started running, tears blurring his vision. When he finally stopped he realized he was lost.
So here he was now shivering on the bench and feeling miserable, when he suddenly felt a gentle hand touch his shoulder, he turned to see Bob smiling at him through the rain.
"Bob " he began "I'm sorry .I just wanted to..."
"I know Enzo, it's ok" Bob assured him " Come on lets get you outta the rain" With that Bob's strong arms picked him up and carried him back to his apartment., where he happily drift off to sleep, while Bob called a frantic Dot to let her know that Enzo was found and that he would be dropped off in the morning.
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"Don't worry, Bob" Matrix thought ", you pushed me this far. Now I'm pushing you the rest of the way, ........I wont let you give up"
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For the next few weeks , Bob underwent psychotherapy to help him deal with his nervousness and aggression.
It was terribly frustrating for everyone.
At times Bob's moods would be so bad he'd refuse to respond to anything at all, other times he'd get agitated and lash out at the therapist or anyone around him.
He also had to receive several more blood tests, to keep track of his bodies healing.
But the STD tests they had to preform on him were the worst.
At times the pain was so great , Bob would be reduced to screaming on the examining table, writhing in anguish. When it was more painful than he could bear, he would be carried back to his room unconscious ,by Matrix.
Bob hated the tests, he was never a person who liked to be handled too much to begin with, and right now was very temperamental about anyone touching him below the belt.
But he was forced to undergo them. Held against his will, restrained or sedated if necessary.
And this slowly ate away at his suffering spirit.
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Dot and Mouse walked down the hall to Bob's room, They thought that perhaps a visit would cheer him up.
Dot entered the room first "Morning, Bob" she smiled
He didn't move.
"Hi there sugah" Mouse beamed
He made no attempt to talk with them, nor had he even acknowledge their presence.
Dot looked at Mouse cautiously, the suspense in the room was crushing.
She spoke very carefully "Bob, .....do you want to go for a walk?"
"No" he answered
"Don't you want to get out for a breath of air?" Mouse asked
"No"
"Would you rather stay in then?"she said
"No"
The two women looked at each other helplessly.
"What would you like to do then?" Dot asked
"Die" he said flatly
End Pt. 3