Eriol
I don't have the VAGUEST idea what she's talking about. Or Syaoran, either for that matter. I didn't show up until much later in the night.
Keroberos
I had decided to get up and walk around for a while. Nakuru and Spinel Sun were trying to get Spin the Bottle going and the last thing I wanted to do was kiss ANYBODY. I could tell Yue was having the same thought. Unfortunately, Nakuru had already gotten to him.
"One knot here, one knot there..." Nakuru sang cheerfully, halfway done tying Yue to a chair. "Oh, my. You have such lovely hair!" And as she touched it she giggled, "that RHYMED!"
Syaoran was already part of the game according to Spinel Sun later. He just wasn't aware of it in his drunken sleep.
I found myself looking for Tomoyo-chan and Hiiragizawa-kun.
Eriol
I hadn't shown up yet, Keroberos.
Keroberos
Riiiiight...
I found them in Fujitaka-san's bedroom. In a VERY compromising position. Which I would have taped myself had Tomoyo-chan not been doing the job for me already.
I knew she was a freak.
"Kero-chan!" Tomoyo had cried, sitting up instantly. Next to her, Eriol-kun also rose, a dazed look in his eyes. His shirt was undone, hair tousled, glasses hanging half off his face.
THE SHE-DEVIL!
"Uh, Eriol-kun and I...we were, um..." she quickly fixed his glasses, setting them firmly on his face, "trying to fix his SHIRT!"
"Oh, his buttons were POPPIN' open too, hmm?" I had retorted gleefully.
Tomoyo had looked at me for another moment before sighing in defeat. "Don't tell Sakura-chan, onegai! If she knew I was CHEATING on her-"
Eriol blinked like an owl at THAT one.
"Tomoyo-chan," I had said gently, knowing she was fragile and the last thing I wanted to do was HARM her, "Sakura-chan doesn't like LESBIANS! She's with the BRAT! She isn't seeing YOU!" I had had to remind her.
No, I didn't think that was harsh in the LEAST.
But maybe I should have kept my mouth shut because she suddenly started SCREAMING her head off.
"AAAAIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! NOOOOOOO!"
And a second later she was up and out the door, running.
I had looked at Eriol at that point who was looking the slightest bit flustered. "There's always Mizuki-sensei..." I tried to console him.
"That there is."
When I got back to the living room Tomoyo-chan was beating Sakura-chan. Not that it really woke her but it was fun seeing Tomoyo fling Sakura around like a stuffed animal.
Stuffed animal. HEE.
I take it you've never seen Sakura sleep. You thought Usagi-chan was bad, you ain't seen NOTHING. The Card Mistress tops both Usagi AND Miaka. And Yukito rivals the three of them in the food department, but back to the subject...
The Brat was back to being unconscious after I BEAT him. Erm, I meant, beat the FLAMES... I DID try to SAVE him, mind you. Whatever the case, Nakuru was playing Spin the Bottle with Spinel Sun, Yue, and the Brat. Whenever the mouth landed in her direction she would take Spinel Sun and make HIM kiss whoever was her opponent.
"YOU, not ME!"
Yue. He could take a LOT of crap but I saw him. He'd break soon. And the hidden camera in the potted plant would be my eternal proof of the bloody carnage he'd leave behind.
I couldn't WAIT!
A few more slobbery kisses from Spinel Sun and it would all be over. I morphed back into my cute self and sat out of reach, content to watch.
Eriol
I finally showed up at 9:00pm. Why so late? I wanted to be presentable, of COURSE. Do you know how long it takes to PERFECT my expression of innocence and then keep it for an extended period of time? It saps at LEAST half my magic.
No WONDER Sakura defeated me so easily.
Whatever the case, when I showed up, the doorbell was broken and the front door was wide open. I wandered in, calling out for someone and trying to make my presence known. I mean, how DARE they invite me and then NOT wait on me hand and foot?
Erm...
Well, what a surprise that I show up and find Sakura unconscious, my cute little descendant drunk out of his GOURD, and the rest of the group playing Spin the Bottle. I had half a mind to join but Tomoyo-chan kept giving me this look of certain DEATH should I have chosen to sit opposite her.
So instead I sat to the side, a mere watcher. Poor Spinel Sun got a chance to kiss EVERYONE, especially my descendant. Nice, wet, sloppy cat kisses, cold nose included. While everyone was enjoying themselves, it was at THAT point that I heard the noise.
"Ssh..."
Everyone became quiet, seeing as how it had been ME to speak. I listened close and heard it again, that strange sound from the second floor. And I knew in a moment what it was. Someone had snuck in through Sakura's room window, was walking around upstairs.
"You've got to be kidding." Nakuru had uttered and her face had lit up with this evil light that made me suddenly VERY proud to know her.
I smiled at that point, standing up slowly. "Hide."
Yue
I have nothing to say. The whole group of them scattered, leaving ME tied up to a chair. It's fine with me, though. I'd deal with them all, one by one on my own terms.
In the meantime, I managed to swing around the chair a bit so that my back was to the fire in the living room and I beat out the flames with my wings.
Nakuru
Oh, that's RIGHT! I left poor Yue-san TIED up to a chair! Yee-hee-hee! Oops!
Whatever. I grabbed Spinel Sun and ran, hiding in the bathroom and shutting the door behind us. The Kinomotos had two bathrooms, one on the first floor, the other on the ground floor and I had enough balls to go hide in the second floor even though I knew the intruder was on the second floor but I decided not to, seeing as how Spinel Sun's VERY important life was in my hands-
"Can we PLEASE go hide upstairs? PLEASE? PLEEEEEEEEEASE?!" I had begged.
"No. Now hide behind the toilet."
So I did what ~I~ wanted and...hid behind the toilet. Spinel Sun opened up the little drawer underneath the sink and climbed in, shutting it behind himself. His talents amazed me at times. So I did what any normal person would do when faced with this predicament.
Reaching behind me and to the side I found a can of RAID. I managed to waddle forward and not trip on my hair, I really should cut it soon, and I swung open the drawer, sprayed half the can into the space and then shut the door, holding it shut as Spinel Sun shrieked like a little girl.
Tomoyo
Ok, NO! You have PROBLEMS and I'M going to pick up this story! GOD! SOME people just need SO much help.
ANYWAYS, Eriol-kun grabbed my hand and dragged me off to the kitchen to hide behind the counter.
Eriol
YOU grabbed ME!
Tomoyo
Who is telling this story?! Yeah, I THOUGHT so! WhatEVER! After he grabbed me and KIDNAPPED me to hide behind the counter we waited. And waited. He kept mumbling about how he could hear the intruder walking around Fujitaka-san's room and I really couldn't GIVE a dang but he was cute so I decided to listen up.
I didn't realize until later that I didn't have my camcorder but that was ok. There were four others in the living room alone.
Anyway, we were...um, hiding, RIGHT! And Sakura-chan suddenly takes that PERFECT opportunity to WAKE up. I wanted to beat her again but I didn't want to give away our spot. Of COURSE I was WORRIED about her but I ALSO worried about Eriol-kun and I...
Eriol
You were trying to RAPE me, Tomoyo-chan. That's why you didn't even notice Sakura-chan getting up. Not until ~I~ noticed it and by then my shirt was already torn to PIECES-
Tomoyo
What a LIAR you are! Your shirt got ripped up when you took on the robber, REMEMBER? Anyways, Sakura-chan GETS up and starts WALKING off towards the bathroom.
Nakuru
That's right! I was still trying to lock Spinel Sun in when she comes in and sees me crouching next to the drawer. I think she was still kinda asleep because she just shook her head and walked RIGHT back out. I tried to tell her that there was a robber in the house but Spinel Sun is STRONG when he's angry and that distracted me again.
Sakura
MY turn. You ALL got your chance and now you're going to hear it from MY point of view-
Spinel Sun
I didn't get a chance to talk.
Sakura
Don't MAKE me go GHETTO on you...
Yeah, I didn't THINK so.
So there I am. I wake up and I have no idea why I fell out in the FIRST place-
Keroberos
*Cough* Nekked Kid Priest... *Hack*
Sakura
I GET up and walk towards the bathroom but Nakuru was using it so I just kinda went off for the staircase. I figured it was late in the night because it was dark and the house was empty and Syaoran was all out on the living room floor. Along with the remnants of a BONFIRE but, oooooh, you guys are going to pay for that LATER.
So I start going up the stairs. I walked right by Kero-chan who was trying to act like a statue in the middle of my hallway. Yeah, that worked like a FREAKING charm...
Keroberos
YOU didn't notice me...
Sakura
You'll be the FIRST to incur my wrath.
I went to my room and looked in. The window was wide open and I wasn't sure if I had left it open like that but what was I going to say? And who was I going to say it TO? Everybody was gone. So I went to the bathroom and was halfway done using it when-
"WHOA! WHAT THE HELL DID YOU EAT FOR DINNER?!"
The robber stands up inside the shower and I realized at that point that my entire bathroom floor was covered with water because somebody's FUR had clogged the drain and no one ELSE had turned off the water in the shower.
I got up, fixed myself right quick and started shouting and asking who he was and WHY in tarnations he was hiding in my bathroom-
Syaoran
Please, Sakura, you woke ME up. You were screaming like a little bitch, just like I did before.
Sakura
You sleep on the couch tonight.
I GOT up and asked him who he was and he swipes at me to grab me but I ran. I couldn't find my Key, I had NO idea where I left it so I just hightailed it out of there and just ran down the hallway.
As soon as the robber passed Kero-chan he came to life...
Keroberos opened his mouth and yawned, blinking sleepily as I came screaming down the hallway.
AAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!"
"God-dang it, girl! You're just one big WEAPON, aren't you?!" the robber shouted, racing after me. I had NO idea what he meant by that so I kept running and at that point Kero-chan swiped at him as he ran.
In fact, I think that's ALL he did because the guy was still coming after me when I risked a glance over my shoulder.
"BIG FAT HELP YOU ARE!!"
I managed to reach the first floor but he had a hand in my hair and I screamed again, kicking him in the crotch.
Yue
His crotch hit the banister, actually...
Sakura
YUE-SAN!
GOD!
Anyways, I HIT the motherf*cker in the crotch and ran-
Tomoyo
OH MY GOD, do you kiss your MOTHER with that mouth??
Sakura
My mother is DEAD, Tomoyo-CHAN! GEEEEEEEEEEEEZ!
So, I ran and out comes Nakuru from the bathroom as I come up, blocking my escape. Yeah, thanks a LOT, BITCH! I skid to a stop and she's holding Spinel Sun who was coughing like he was hacking up a LUNG. She takes one look at the robber, YANKS Spinel Sun's tail so that he extends his claws and FLINGS him at the robber. Poor Spinel Sun, I've never heard him SCREECH like that and he was this big HAIRBALL of limbs, just scratching up the robber-
Nakuru
Yeah, that was funny, actually...
Sakura
I shoved Nakuru out of the way and kept running because, well, I figured, better her than ME, y'know? I reached the living room and Syaoran was JUST getting up. He REEKED of alcohol...Yeah, don't THINK I didn't notice the empty bottle!
So then Tomoyo comes SCREAMING out of the kitchen because she wasn't TAPING the whole robber incident and poor Eriol-kun, she FLINGS him at the robber, too! His shirt was ALL f*cked up so I thought for a second that he had ALREADY gotten into a fight with the robber. Oh, well.
I managed to get to the phone and the line was DEAD! Whose fault that was I don't KNOW but one of y'all BEST come forth with that information before the night is out!
So then I look at the couch and THERE'S my Key! I nearly took another dump in my pants I was so happy! I ran over, knocked poor Syaoran into the robber, too, and picked up my key.
"RELEASE!"
I called on Windy and tossed the motherf*-
Nakuru
You called FIREY and started up the bonfire again, Sakura-chan! God, get it RIGHT!
Sakura
THAT'S IT, BITCH! IT'S ON!
Eriol
Actually, after calling Firey and setting the bonfire ablaze again she THEN called on Windy and SPREAD the fire. See, my little descendant, FANNING the flames spreads it...
The house was burning but that was ok because between me, my descendant, Spinel Sun and Keroberos (Tomoyo-chan was taping) we took down the robber. It was at that point that I heard Yue-san screaming something.
"That's the Card Mistress' BROTHER!"
The sh*t hit the fan there.
Syaoran
I was out faster than you could say 'Daidouji-san's a whore'.
Tomoyo
HEY!!
Sakura
Anyways, to make an already long story even LONGER we all managed to get out of the house while it burned and once outside I used Watery to put out the flames.
And that's about it. Then you guys came along and here we are now.
...Is my dad going to come bail us all out now?