Immortality
By: Celestial Angel
Disclaimer: Digimon doesn't belong to me, it belongs to the respective owners. The song lyrics from "Immortality" don't belong to me either, I'm not sure who they do belong to though. The Silence is something from Sailor Moon, it doesn't belong to me either. Well that's all for the Disclaimer.
Author's Note 1: This is slightly AU because it assumes that after Tai and his friends return from DigiWorld after defeating Apocalymon, that the DigiWorld remained at peace. (Meaning, no 02). Also, I tried to make it short, so I left out some stuff, but I think you'll stillget the gist.
Author's Note 2: All right, I know that I've deviated a little. I know that I haven't finished Every Rose… yet, but I was listening to a Celine Dion CD and I zoned out for the 1st song, but by the time I zoned back in, the song "Immortality" was on, since I was working on Rose Part 2, my mind started working on how I could apply that song to a fanfic. The first thing that came to my mind, was Mimato. I found out how to. I think this is good, but beware, I was crying when I wrote this. Well, now to Immortality.
*~*~*
When Matt awoke, he found himself with a killer headache. What happened? He thought. He searched his memory for a minute before remembering, Mimi!
He looked around for her and finally spotted her lying on the ground a few feet away. She wasn't moving and appeared to be unconcious.
No! his mind screamed. She went through with it! No!
He raced over to her still form and felt for a pulse. He didn't find one. It was all he could do to keep from breaking down into hysterics. All he could do was think.
Why! Why did Silence have to come! Why? If Silence had just stayed away, Mimi wouldn't have had to fight and she wouldn't have had to die! But now it's too late! She's gone and there is nothing I can do about it! I hate myself! I should have sacrificed myself, not her! She had so much to live for. I don't!
Yes you do… a familiar voice countered, you have much to live for. You promised me you would go on. Don't break that promise. Please!
I won't, he thought, I will keep on living. But only for you. Only for you…
He gently picked up her limp form and cradled her to his chest, wishing that it didn't have to end this way. He began to sob, softly at first, but soon enough, it turned into full fledged greiving. Around him, the world faded away, and was replaced by grief at the loss of the one he loved.
"No," he choked out between sobs, " just as I finally reveal my feelings, she goes and dies. Why?" He looked towards the heavens and screamed from the bottom of his broken heart, " Why?! Why did you have to pick her! Why did you have to give her that dream?! Why! Why not someone else!? Why!!!!"
Almost as in response, the threatening storm clouds broke, sending their cargo falling towards the earth. Thousands of tiny water droplets fell from the heavens towards the earth. He didn't care though, his heart was broken, and he welcomed the rain. He remembered how once, she had called the raindrops Heaven's Tears.
Flashback…
It had been in DigiWorld, after they defeated Metal Seadramon but before they took on Puppetmon. It had been a horrible day for the DigiDestined. They had been traveling through the forest, when from out of nowhere, what could only be described as 'a wall of rain' came pouring down from the foreign sky. Tai had wanted to keep on traveling, but none of the other DigiDestined had wanted to, so the group took shelter in a cave they had found.
It took them a couple minutes to dry off, before they actually sat down to relax. The digimon had sat near the back of the cave, while the DigiDestined sat in various places in the cave.
Kari and T.K. sat with the Digimon, trying to dry them off as best as they could.
Izzy was also sitting near the back of the cave, so as to prevent his laptop from getting wet.
Joe was sitting against a large rock that jutted up from the cave floor, complaining about how awful the weather was.
Sora sat and leaned against a wall, trying to get some sleep it appeared. Tai paced the floor impatiently, complaining about how this rain was delaying them and such things.
Matt remembered himself, leaning against the cave wall, not caring either way. Right now, he was too busy with internal descisions.
Mimi was the only one not doing something. She seemed bored, so she eventually sat down and stared out at the rain.
"Hmm," she said softly, " Heaven's crying. Something bad must be about to happen."
Matt, being the only one close enough to hear, was puzzled by this.
"What do you mean?" he asked
" What?" she asked startled.
"You said that 'heaven is crying'. What does that mean?"
"Oh, that," she said. She looked away and blushed slightly. " I didn't realize that I said it that loud."
She paused and was silent for a moment. " I really don't want to explain." She said simply after a moment or two.
Picking up on something in her voice, he moved over and sat down next to her. She looked away from him, her face turned towards the rain. She sat like that for a while, not turning back, just staring. She would've sat like that until he left, but there was a loud snapping noise that emanated from the back of the cave.
Everyone whipped around to see what could have caused the noise. It turned out, that it was only T.K., on accident, he had thrown a stray twig into the fire causing it to snap and crackle. He apologized sheepishly, before laying down to sleep.
Normally, Matt would've gotten annoyed, but right now, he was too shocked to be annoyed. In that instant, he realized why she had turned away from the group. She had been crying silently all the while. Concerned, he asked, "Mimi, what's wrong? Why are you crying?"
As though just realizing, she had tears in her eyes, she lifted her hand and wiped them away while mumbling, "…just had something in my eyes, that's all." She lifted her head up and said directly to his face, " Now, if you don't mind," she got up to walk away, ", please, leave me alone!"
She moved to step away from him, but he reached out and grabbed on to her arm with a firm grip.
She looked shocked at the action and retaliated by trying to pull away and shouting, " Yamato! Let go of me right this instant!" she screamed aware that everyone, except T.K. and Kari were watching them. Palmon looked a bit worried for her friend and got up to run over and help Mimi, but she was stopped by Gatomon, who like her human companion, was wise beyond her age.
"Leave them be," Gatomon whispered softly. " Do not interfere."
"What?" Palmon asked. " What do you mean? He's hurting her! I have to help her!" Palmon said, her voice barely below a whisper.
" They will work it out on their own. It's not like they are two evil Digimon fighting. They will figure out their own solution."
For a second, Palmon was unsure whether or not to follow the feline's advice, but after about a minute, she shrugged the occurrence off and sat back down with the other Digimon and watched.
Both of them were aware that all open eyes were on them. Mimi blushed a bright red and hissed to his face, " Let go of me right now! You're making a scene!"
" I will if you stop lying," he said.
For a moment, her anger turned to curiosity, "What do you mean?" she asked, hoping that the other DigiDestined would stop watching. For a moment, it seemed that they wouldn't, but thanks to Kari, who had awakened with the commotion, it wasn't so. As though sensing Mimi's anxiety, she said, " You guys, I think we should all get some sleep."
" Yeah," said Tai as he stretched and yawned. " I agree. G'night." He said, as he leaned against the cave wall and fell asleep. The digimon curled up and went to sleep, and all the other Digidestined stopped what they were doing and went to sleep.
When the others were asleep, Matt turned to her and asked. " Well?"
She was silent, not wanting to answer.
He waited for about a minute for her to reply, but when she didn't, he patted the ground next to him and said, " C'mon, why don't you sit down. You must be uncomfortable standing."
"All right," she acquiesced sitting down next to him. Again, she was silent, but then she softly said. " Well, the reason I said that was…"
She looked up at him, the unshed tears welling in her eyes making them sparkle in the dim illumination of the firelight. " The last time I can remember it rained this hard, something terrible happened." She paused again.
" What happened?" he asked softly.
She looked away, and he was afraid that she wouldn't ever tell him, but his fears were allayed when she began to speak.
" It was something awful, hideously awful, that happened just a few months before I went to camp and became a DigiDestined. It was an awful accident that changed my life forever…
I really don't remember too much about that day in particular, just the fact that the accident occurred on that day is enough though. What I do remember though, is the rain. It was raining cats and dogs on that day, but I really didn't mind at the time. While it is true that I do have a baby brother, what most people don't know, and never suspected, was that I had an *older* brother who died just before I went to Digiworld.
She paused and looked up at him, wanting to know if she should continue. Sensing the unspoken question, he nodded and she did continue.
He died so suddenly, that at first, I wasn't even sure if it happened or not, but I learned all too soon, the harsh truth. We got the call in the morning, as soon as we all had woken up, so I don't think any of us were too aware of what was really going on around us. When we all did get up, to some extent, we all realized that my brother had not come home from his friend's party that had taken place last night. We all immediately thought that maybe he had just stayed overnight and was on his way home now. All right, just so you know, in my family, we're all optimists, so we all refused to think the worst. Nevertheless, deep inside my heart, I knew, that he was never coming home. It was only a few minutes later, that the dreaded call came. My mother picked up the phone and the policeman told her that my brother had been driving home one night, when his car was impacted by that of a drunk driver. The other driver had been going 100 miles per hour, and even with all the protection in the world, he wouldn't have stood a chance. The impact, the sheer impact alone killed him. His neck was snapped on impact. Thought it is true that the car later hit a tree, all of the doctors agree that he died on first impact. The driver, as though just realizing what he had done, and knowing that he would face punishment, nonetheless called for help and tried to help my brother, but it was too late…
The tears began falling in abundance now, breaths became half choked sobs of inconsolable grief. Identifying with what she was going through at the loss of a sibling, he put his hand on her should and she looked up, and through his own tears, he managed to give her a weak half smile.
"You don't have to continue," he said, " I know what it's like to lose a sibling. I did too."
Her shock was shown openly on her face and she didn't bother to conceal it. " What?!"
He nodded and looked away, fresh tears forming, but after a minute, he turned back to her and asked her straightforwardly, " Did you know I had a twin sister?"
"No," she said, even more shocked.
He looked away again, " Well I did," he said as he began to draw aimless patterns in the dirt. " I had a twin sister who died when she…no, when we were only six years old. I don't really know how I can explain this, but we had some kind of special bond, it's sorta like extreme empathy, one that runs so deep, that sometimes, we could sense each other's thoughts. As with everything, at times it was great, but at times it wasn't. This is one of those times it wasn't…"
When my twin went missing, I fell under some sort of illness. I really don't know what it was, but I knew what caused it. I felt like I was going to die, and at that moment, I knew that she would never be found alive. It is just one of those things that comes to you and at first, you don't really know what it means but you know too late, all too late! At first the disease started out with flu like symptoms, but then the fever rose dangerously high and my parents, who were still together at that time, feared I was going to die, but I didn't. After that came major aches and pains, headaches, nausea, chills, difficulty breathing, and such. I was definintely sick, but no one, no one except I, and maybe me sister, if she was alive at that time, knew how sick I realy was. I slept a lot during that long anguishing week, but I did not sleep soundly. When I closed my eyes, I would see *things*.
"What sort of things?" she asked.
" Awful things, hideous things that no child should be forced to know. It was through those nightmares, that I learnt the harsh realities of life…"
When I kept screaming that I knew where Candy, my sister, was, most everyone thought that I was delirious, but I knew that I was perfectly sane, so later, after much ranting and screaming, they finally listened to me, but of course, by then, it was too late.
One day, out of the blue, the nightmares stopped and my sickness disappeared, leaving me in perfect health. Everyone was astounded by my sudden recovery, but I would have rather stayed sick.
" Do you remember how I said that our health was 'linked'?"
"Yes," she said.
"Well, when I was sick, that was only a slight indication of what she was going through, but it meant that she was still alive, but when it stopped…"
"It meant that she had died," Mimi finished.
"Yes."
***
" Does T.K. know about this?" she asked.
" No," he answered, " and he won't for a long time." He paused for a second. " Please," he said, " please don't tell anyone what I've told you. I don't want T.K. to know about his sister until he is old enough. I don't want him to go through what I went through at such an early age."
" No one should have to," she said. " I promise, I won't ever tell him. I'll leave that up to you."
***
We had stayed up the rest of the night finishing our stories, and mourning the loss of our siblings, but knowing, that their suffering was over and that we would ultimately see them again. We both knew, that they were living among the stars happy and free, watching over us and wishing that we all could be together again. Perpetual life and happiness.
In the end, she handed him a photo. " This is a picture of my older brother," she said. He looked down at the photo and found the face of a man of about sixteen staring up at him. He had close cropped black hair and chocolate colored eyes. It appeared that he was standing by the ocean, but one couldn't see clearly enough. He took a look at it and handed it back to her, understanding the value of such pictures.
" I want you to have it," she said clearly.
He paused for a moment, uncertain, " Are you sure?" he asked.
" Yes," she answered quietly.
" Then in that case," he said as he reached into his pocket, searching for his wallet, " I want you to have this." From his wallet, he withdrew a picture of his sister. She had the exact same color hair and the same color eyes. This picture too was taken at the beach. His sister was sitting at the water's edge making sand castles with the vast power of the immense ocean, just a few inches away. The picture was taken at just the right moment. The sun beaming down upon the surf making it glitter like an sea of diamonds. The palm trees waving slightly in the breeze, the musical sound of the waves rushing upon the shore, the sound of the seagull's cry. If one thought hard enough, you could almost imagine themselves at the scene. It was a breathtaking picture.
" It's beautiful," she breathed.
" Here, take this too," he said as he handed her a small golden object, a small ring with two small diamond hearts on it, "it was my sister's. It was supposed to be her's. It was a tradition. That ring has been passed down in my family for generations. My mother gave it to me when my parent's split up. She told me to give it to the first person who I felt I could talk to about my sister. I have never told anyone but you."
She shook her head slightly, " Matt, I can't take it. It means too much to you. I don't deserve it."
" I promised my mother that I would give it to the first person, and I can't break that promise. Please take it. Please."
She sat for a moment, undecided, but eventually, she looked up and nodded. " Thank you," she said. " I''ll wear it always. Thank you."
End Flashback…
***
She had. She had worn it. Since that day, she had worn that ring as well as kept his secret about the twin sister. He had done the same and kept the secret about her brother. It was somewhat strange, but for once, he felt that she was someone he could identify with through the tragic loss of their siblings.
Of course, that something awful had come true, the attempted break up did occur and the DigiDestined did split. His only guess was that she had been as much affected by it as he had. Of course, that was resolved, but the memories still lingered and would live on in the hearts of the DigiDestined.
It was still raining, but he sat out in it, not caring that he was getting wet. Nothing mattered anymore.
Out of the blue, a voice came wafting over the land and through the rain to his ears.
" Matt!" Tai's voice rang out through the rain. " Matt! Where are you?!"
Oh great. Tai was headed here. He didn't want them to find out about her death this way. They weren't supposed to.
" Mimi!" he heard Sora's voice as well as all the others coming nearer to his position.
No! he thought, T.K. mustn't see this! He's too young! Too innocent! I must keep him from this! I must protect him!
But Mimi's words rang in his mind, You've got to stop protecting him at some time. You must realize that you will not always be here to protect him just as I won't be here to protect my brother. As much as I want to, I know that I won't be able to shield him forever, and that is something, that you too, must realize.
Almost as though he was being controlled, he lifted his head and shouted, " Over here!"
" We're coming!" he heard Tai's voice answer. " Stay where you are!"
"Okay!" he shouted back.
***
Another minute or so brought Tai and the rest of the gang close to the lake. He could see them, but just barely because of the rain, and he knew that the condition must be the same for them.
He turned back and looked down at the pale body, before picking it up gently and carrying it towards the others.
When he was close enough to see through the almost blinding downpour, he realized that Tai was carrying his unconcious sister.
I should have known that her death would have affected Kari, he thought as he met up with the group.
The others were running towards him when they caught sight of the body and halted dead in their tracks. He knew that they'd react this way. Their jaws hit the ground, but he retained an air of false calm around him. Joe was the first of the group to react.
He spoke tentatively as though any sudden event could shatter this fragile glass orb that was the world. " Matt," he began, " what happened?"
Immortality
There is a vision and a fire in me
I keep the memory of you and
Me, inside
And we don't say goodbye…
***
" That's the whole story. When you guys ran for cover, she stayed behind. She later told me that she was supposed to fight something called the Silence. She said that it would come today, and come it did. Somehow, she managed to defeat it before…before she…" He trailed off, unable to finish the sentence.
Sora put a comforting hand on his shoulder. " Matt, we understand what pain this is causing you, but you mustn't blame yourself for her death. You can't."
" Yes I can!" he exploded, " and you should too! She died not only for me, for you, but for everyone! Everyone caused her death! She died for us Digidestined to survive! How can I not blame myself?!"
" Matt," Joe said with more force in his voice than anyone could ever remember, "remember, it was her choice. She chose this path. This was what she wanted! If there's one thing you should know about, it's choices!"
" What's that supposed to mean?!" Matt shot back.
" What I'm saying, is that you made choices that were best for you, or what you knew you must do! All she did was make the same choice, except, this time, there was no one to save her!"
" That's not what you said!" he roared, " you're saying that I let her die again! That's what you're saying! If I could've I would've tried to save her!"
" That's enough!" Tai burst out, rising to his feet, " calm down Matt!"
" Why should I?!"
" Because," Tai stated forcefully, " you know Joe is right! It was her choice!"
There was no response, Matt just glared at Tai who countered it with an aura of calmness, it was very well suited for him.
" Matt," Tai began, " we know that you would have tried to save her if you could, but she did what she did for a reason. You would've only gotten in her way during the fight, and you know that's true. Don't deny it. There would have been no point in you dying again after she risked everything to save us all! You understand?"
Matt was absolutely speechless, so he simply nodded.
" Good," said Tai as he looked to where his sister and T.K. were sitting silently. Kari was still phasing in and out of conciousness, and T.K. was in a deep state of shock from finding out about his sister.
" Now," said Tai, " what are we going to do about them?"
" T.K. will be okay, but only with time," stated Izzy, speaking for the first time in ages, " but, Kari, she's another story."
" She will be okay though?" asked Sora worriedly.
" Yes," said Izzy, " physically, she'll be okay, but psychologically, that's another matter. We don't know what kind of emotional scars this ordeal will leave."
" I feel so sorry for her," said Sora looking away, " who knows what kind of ghosts she'll have to live with, and the worst part, is that she'll have to live with them for the rest of her life."
How fitting for her, thought Tai. He could only now see how well their traits were suited to them.
By this time, the rain had died down to a light drizzle. It seemed that heaven was done crying. It seemed that the world had become calm again, but the hearts of the remaining Digidestined were anything but calm. However, one thought, one fact, unified them all. Heaven might be done crying, but they sure as hell, were not.
***
We don't say goodbye
With all my love for you
And what else we may do
We don't say, goodbye…
***
It's now after the funeral and everyone but the Digidestined have left…
The remaining Digidestined stood in a semi-circle around the small marble headstone that marked the grave of Mimi Tachikawa. There was little talk as they stood there, silently paying their respects to their fallen friend. In each of their minds, were the thoughts of everything she had done for them. They remembered the vibrant you woman whose love for life was so total, yet her heart concealed the deadliest of secrets. How she had managed to survive with that knowledge, no one knew, but somehow, she did, but now, she was gone forever.
It was almost sunset now, and their hearts were sinking like the sun below the horizon. They knew that nothing could be changed now. It was far too late, and no one knew that better than Kari. No one.
No one wanted to leave the grave, but they knew that they must return to their homes, their lives which she had given back to them, their lives, which she had died for.
One by one, they walked up to the grave and paid their final respects.
Tai was the first. He walked up to the grave and placed a bouquet of roses on it, then knelt beside it, in an almost regal manner and said, " Thank you for everything. I will always remember your sacrifice dear friend, and I will always be, eternally grateful." With that simple, but eloquent statement, he stood up and walked off into the sunset.
Sora was next. She knelt in front of the grave and placed a bouquet of lilies on it. Her goodbye was longer, but just as eloquent as Tai's. " Mimi," she began, " you are…I mean, you were my best friend. You always were. We were supposed to go to college together in a few months. We were supposed to be bridesmaids at each other's weddings, we were supposed to be friends until we were little old ladies talking over a cup of tea. But, in spite of that, I just want you to know, you'll always be my best friend. May your spirit rest in peace."
With that, she too got up and walked away, hiding her tears from view.
Izzy was next. He too knelt and placed a bouquet of roses on her grave. His statement was just as heartfelt. " I'm sorry that we never really talked much. I was always too busy with my computer, like that time in the maze. I tried to change, really I did. If only I had known all that you had done for us…If only…" he paused to wipe away some tears from his eyes. " Well, what I've been trying to say, is thank you for this second chance. Thank you for giving me the chance to change. I will not let you down, my friend."
Izzy then left, disappearing into the sunset, just like Tai and Sora. Joe was up next. He too knelt and placed a bouquet of flowers, these were violets and baby's breath. " Mimi," he began, " I'm sorry that I never acknowledged what you did for us. I'm truly sorry. I just wanted you to know, you'll always hold a special place in my heart. You helped me grow in so many ways. Thank you for everything." He then got up and left.
T.K. was next. He placed a large bouquet of roses ontop of the grave and knelt. " Hi, Mimi," he began, " I'm sorry that I never said thank you for everything you did for us, but I never knew. Also, thank you for keeping the secret about my sister. I was glad that neither of you told me. Thank you for protecting my soul. I will do my best to protect kari and my brother from sorrow." With that, he too got up and with a heavy heart, headed home.
Kari was next. She knelt and placed a large bouquet of white roses with all the other flowers. She didn't say anything, but Matt knew, that she was saying everything that needed to be said in her heart. There was no need for words.
After a few minutes, she too got up and walked away. Now, only Matt was left. He knew, deep inside, that this was going to be the hardest part for him. Nonetheless, he moved forward, placed a bouquet of roses, lilies and baby's breath ontop of the grave and knelt beside it. He just knelt silently, pouring his heart our silently. He knew that she could hear him, as with Kari, there was no need for words.
The sun had almost completely sunk below the horizon by the time he was done. When he was finished, however, he felt as thought a great weight had been lifted off of his shoulders. He felt somewhat free again. He took one last look at the grave before turning and walking away, but, as he did, a slight wind stirred up, and he stood there and let it wash over his body. After a moment, he stuck his hands in his jacket pockets and started to walk away, but after about two steps, he stopped and pulled a piece of paper from his pocket. It was folded, so he unfolded it, and when he saw what it was, a slight smile came to his lips.
It was picture that he had found. It was a very special picture indeed, for there was no where on earth that it could be taken. In the picture were, a woman in about her early twenties with long blonde hair and azure eyes that rivaled his own. He knew that he had never seen her before, well, at least not under that appearance, but his heart recognized her as his sister. Also in the picture, was a man with black hair and chocolate brown eyes. He recognized the man as Mimi's older brother. And last, but definitely not least, there was Mimi, still wearing the ring, standing with her brother and his sister. On their faces were expressions of pure delight, such that could not be found on this planet. Out behind them, extending for all eternity, was a sea, but this was not a sea of water, but rather, the breath-taking sea of stars.
He now knew that she was safe an happy, and that was all that mattered to him. Smiling, he refolded the picture and placed back in his pocket before vanishing into the sunset.
When he was gone, however. The figure of a teenage woman walked up to the grave. She had a troubled, pained expression on her face. Again, Kari knelt by the grave and prayed. Then she got up and again left, but this time, she spoke, a simple phrase, but one that carried hordes of meaning.
" Goodbye…sister."
The End.
A/N: All right, so Immortality's finished? How'd you like it? I know that I dropped a lot of bombshells and left a lot of things unexplained, but I did all that for a reason. Don't worry if you didn't understand some parts. That'll be explained in another fic. Also, no, I haven't forgotten about Rose, I just have some serious writer's block on it, so please don't get mad. K? Well, I'm outta here for now! Ja Ne peoples!- Celestial Angel.