***Misted Reality: Part 4***
Imagine: it's come to the end of a long day, and all you can think about is that moment when you'll finally fall back into bed for a very well deserved night's rest. But, then imagine: you're too afraid to face that comfort, too afraid to face the once safe enclosure of sleep. Why might you be afraid? Well, perhaps your dreams aren't what they used to be. Perhaps your nightmares are more than what they seem. Wouldn't you be afraid to fall asleep?
Seifer Almasy groaned painfully as he came to. His eyes blinked in the pale light of the room, and he looking around him, a little confused.
"You're in the Infirmary...." a familiar voice whispered. "....but don't worry, you're alright. Dr. Kadowaki said you fainted. Do you remember, Seifer?"
Seifer nodded hesitantly as the memories came flooding back. He remembered leaving his room to find out what everyone was rushing to see in the walkway. Once there, Seifer had pushed his way to the front, and then he'd seen......
"Oh, God!" Seifer cried out, sitting up sharply. He turned to Quistis who was sitting on the edge of the bed, and grabbed her shoulders roughly. "Tell me I didn't see what I thought I saw! Please tell me it wasn't......."
"Ashton....." Quistis finished, somewhat stricken. "I'm sorry, Seifer, but it was. He's dead,"
Seifer shook his head, trembling, as his hands slid off her shoulders to rest limply on the bed.
Ashton Petious was dead, and the scene had been left exactly as it had been in Seifer's dream.
(....no.....it must be a coincidence....) Seifer thought desperately. (....please tell me it is.......*I* didn't......)
"Seifer...." Quistis called, shaking him from his thoughts. "....I know it was a horrible thing to see, but I never expected *you* to faint at a sight like that,"
Seifer didn't answer her, he just smiled weakly at her try for lightening the mood.
"Of course..." Quistis continued, her tone becoming much more solemn. "....you don't see things like *that* very often. At least we can imagine that he went quickly, considering his........head was no longer attached to his body....." she fumbled with her hands nervously, obviously disturbed by the image she'd brought back.
Seifer looked at her, a nauseating feeling churning in his stomach at seeing her in pain over this. He lifted an arm to place it on her shoulder.
"Then.......you saw him....?" he asked, praying that she hadn't. To his disappointment, she nodded.
"Who would do something like that, Seifer...?" she asked, tears forming in her eyes at the very thought. "Ashton's been a student of mine ever since I first got my license. He's the one who started the Trepies." she laughed a little then. "He was always trying to flirt with me, and I knew he was working up the nerve to ask me out every time. But, he never did, never could I guess.........and now he'll never even get the chance to be a SeeD....."
She clung to Seifer's hand on her shoulder, holding it tight as she looked up into his eyes. Something dawned on her as she saw him then, looking as pained as she did.
"Oh, Seifer, I'm so sorry," she began. "You're not taking this well either, and I'm not exactly helping the matter, am I?"
"Don't worry. Don't worry about me," Seifer dismissed. "It was just a fluke, fainting like that. I'll be ok,"
Quistis didn't seem so sure, especially considering how jumpy and agitated Seifer had been lately. She knew his dreams were plaguing him, she just didn't know how much.
"Maybe you should go to your room and get some sleep. It might...."
"No!" Seifer interrupted. "I mean.......I'm fine, I don't need any more sleep. I'll just go to the cafeteria and have a bite to eat. I never made it to breakfast, after all," His anxiety was more than clear, but Quistis nodded.
"I never made it either," she smiled. "Might as well go together. I'm sure Dr. Kadowaki will let you go. Come on," She stood up from the bed, pulling Seifer along with her. He was very glad to be getting out of there, and even more glad that he wouldn't be going back to his room to sleep any time soon.
(I just gotta....keep telling myself......that I had nothing to do with what happened) Seifer thought as they left the Infirmary. (I was in my room all night........I was asleep when it happened..........it's just a coincidence.....just......a coincidence.......)
If only he could be sure.....
----------
The day slid by much faster than Seifer would've liked. Sure, he kept himself as busy as possible, avoiding his room......his bed.....at any cost, but he still would eventually have to face what he was so deathly frightened of. He would have to face his dreams, going on faith and a deep sense of denial that Ashton Petious' death was in no way related to him.
The murder, as everyone knew it must have been, was far from solved, however. No one had witnessed the act, and there were no real clues to go on towards catching whoever had committed it. Seifer was deeply disturbed by that. No murderer caught meant there was still a murderer loose, and he couldn't face the idea of it somehow being him.
It was nearly midnight when Seifer finally retired to his dorm. Each step to the door, each step closer to the act of closing his eyes and surrendering to slumber, horrified him. He'd been telling himself over and over in his head that there was no way *he* had killed Ashton. It wasn't possible. It wasn't..... it *couldn't* be possible.
Seifer stood staring at his bed, gathering courage. He felt so stupid really, being afraid to fall asleep. That's as bad as being afraid of the dark. Silly and childish, and certainly not *him*. So, he took a breath, shook his head in repulsion for being so foolish, and climbed into bed.
(It was horrible what happened........but I had nothing to do with it!) Seifer thought assuredly. (I doubt the real killer's even from Garden. They'll catch whoever it is in no time.......of course they will.) he turned anxiously on his side, allowing his eyes to close. (I'm gonna beat these dreams once and for all tonight! I'm a different person than I was a year ago. Quistis is right; I'm not a killer.........I'm not........oh please, God, tell me I'm not......)
----------
/Seifer's eyes were slightly clouded as he walked along the walkway of Balamb Garden. It was late, but he could still tell that his vision was more misted than it should be, as if he was walking through a light fog./
/His mind seemed almost as hazy as his surroundings. He couldn't quite remember why he had decided to go out, why he stalked the hallways of Garden with his Hyperion in his hand......./
/ "Jei, wait up you dork! I can't run that fast!" Seifer heard a young voice call./
/ "It's not my fault you like the Garden hotdogs so much, Porky!" another young voice answered her./
/Seifer turned to look behind him, something gleaming in his eyes as his purpose became clear to him with what he saw. There were two younger classmen headed his way. One was that little boy who was always running around the walkway, to everyone's annoyance. The other was his little friend, a girl barely an inch taller than him who always seemed to be in his shadow. Both were only about 10 years old, and Seifer grinned wickedly as they came closer./
/ "I'll teach you to call me Porky!" the girl called, catching up to her companion as she yanked on the back of his shirt. "Why do you always have to be so...........uh oh......" The girl had caught sight of Seifer, who was now stopped in the walkway, and she looked as though she'd just gotten her hand caught in the cookie jar./
/ "Oh, look, *Jei*, it's Mr. *Almasy*......." the girl said sweetly, pouring on the innocent act as she nudged the boy next to her in the ribs./
/Jei looked up at Seifer fearfully at first, until realizing his friend's plan. "Gee, Maren, you're right. You know, *Sir*, we know we should be in our rooms right now.....we just......ummm......."/
/ "Lost track of time!" Maren finished nervously, grinning a very guilty looking grin./
/Seifer smirked back at them. He knew the rules. It was one thing for an upper classmen to go out after curfew, especially if they were going to the Training Center, but it was a *big* no-no for the younger kids to go out. Of course, Garden conduct wasn't exactly what was preoccupying Seifer's mind right now./
/ "Don't worry, kids, I won't turn ya in," Seifer stated, getting a very relieved reaction from the two in front of him. He then lifted his gunblade from his side a bit, staring at it, and then at them, with a fearfully deranged glare. "But.......I will have to punish you,"/
/The kids merely laughed apprehensively at first, sure that Seifer must be joking around with them. But, as he drew closer, raising his gunblade all the more, they knew to be afraid./
/ "S...Sir?" Jei stuttered. "Mr......Almasy....? What...why....?" He couldn't quite get it out, especially since he was dodging the blow of a very powerful gunblade at the time./
/ "Jei!" Maren screamed, backing fearfully away. Unbelievably, the boy had escaped unharmed, and Seifer stumbled forward from the force of his strike not meeting it's intended target./
/Jei scrambled over to Maren, both too afraid to run away as Seifer recovered himself and turned back towards them./
/ "Xu told us too watch out for you!" Maren yelled. "Instructor Trepe is always telling us how you're a different person now than the one who attacked Garden, but Xu's always told us you were dangerous!"/
/ "Good for her...." Seifer sneered, slamming his gunblade down. But, it clanged against the side railing of the walkway as both kids dashed away. The one thing Seifer hadn't counted on was how fast little children could be. "Hold still, you little brats!"/
/The two had found their legs by this time and were running full pelt to get away from that deadly gunblade. Seifer's long strides caught up to them quickly, however, and he caught Jei by the arm, who surprisingly had fallen a step a behind Maren, within seconds./
/ "Let me go! Let me go!" Jei cried, tears falling down his face in sheer panic and fear./
/Seifer simply grinned murderously. "You really shouldn't go out after dark, you know...." he whispered into the boys ear, plunging his gunblade through the child's chest at the same time. The gasped cry which escaped the boys throat as Seifer let him fall from his gunblade to the floor only gave Seifer more satisfaction./
/Seifer didn't get much time to reflect on a job well done though, for before he could even lift his head up, he was plowed over onto the ground. Maren had charged him, acting on adrenaline and enraged grief that blinded her better judgment./
/ "You monster!" she cried furiously, tears streaming down her face. "It was you, I know it was you! You killed Ashton, you killed......Jei......you......you murderer!" She was pounding on him with her little fists madly./
/Seifer, in shock of the situation, had dropped his gunblade, and was frantically trying to grab at the girl's rapidly moving arms. He caught one in mid-strike finally, but just as he did, she took her other hand and gashed her nails across his left cheek, drawing blood./
/In a horrifying fury, Seifer grasped her other arm, gripping both tightly as he collected himself and got to his feet. Maren was whimpering pitifully under his painful grasp, and Seifer's glare was terrifyingly piercing as he loomed over her. He released her arms and grabbed her by the throat all in one fluid movement. She struggled for breath as he stared back heartlessly, more terror than any child should have to endure screaming out through her red-rimmed eyes./
/ "Are you afraid, little girl? Huh? Do you wish I'd let you go? Do you want to live?" Seifer taunted, despite how Maren obviously couldn't answer him. She was already turning blue. "Nothing to say?" he asked cruelly. "Too bad........" Seifer pulled her closer to him, holding her by the neck with both hands. Then, with one inhuman movement....... "I almost had a change of heart....."........Seifer snapped the girl's neck brutally, and she fell with a sickening thud to the floor............/
Seifer's eyes sprung open as he woke from the dream, but this time he didn't shoot up in bed. He couldn't. He was paralyzed with fear, with grief, with a complete disgust for himself. His breathing just became more and more ragged as he sobbed painfully into his hands.
Seifer couldn't think, he couldn't get those awful images out of his mind. He couldn't get the feel of that delicate, little neck in his murderous hands out of his mind.
Pulling the covers aside, Seifer fled from his bed, escaping into his tiny bathroom to splash water on his face. He had to think calmly, think of some explanation for the dream. He had to keep reminding himself that it wasn't real.
Remember, don't fear the dream, fear the reality........
As Seifer turned on his bathroom light and looked up into the mirror at his reflection, he noticed something that broke down all sense of his reality. There was a deep scratch, clearly new, running along his left cheek.
Shards of glass shattered onto the sink and tiled floor as Seifer slammed his fist into the mirror, into a reflection of something......someone......he couldn't face.
**********
Me, being the idiot that I am, tried moving chapters around on the ff.net site with this story first. Which, of course, ended with me loosing all previous reviews and hit counts. I'm so stupid. Anyways, I hope you like this next chapter, and they'll only be getting better as the story reaches it's climax soon. Please feel free to re-review, since some of you gave such wonderful ones that I now no longer have. :-( And of course, PLEASE REVIEW for this chapter. Love you all! ;-p
Imagine: it's come to the end of a long day, and all you can think about is that moment when you'll finally fall back into bed for a very well deserved night's rest. But, then imagine: you're too afraid to face that comfort, too afraid to face the once safe enclosure of sleep. Why might you be afraid? Well, perhaps your dreams aren't what they used to be. Perhaps your nightmares are more than what they seem. Wouldn't you be afraid to fall asleep?
Seifer Almasy groaned painfully as he came to. His eyes blinked in the pale light of the room, and he looking around him, a little confused.
"You're in the Infirmary...." a familiar voice whispered. "....but don't worry, you're alright. Dr. Kadowaki said you fainted. Do you remember, Seifer?"
Seifer nodded hesitantly as the memories came flooding back. He remembered leaving his room to find out what everyone was rushing to see in the walkway. Once there, Seifer had pushed his way to the front, and then he'd seen......
"Oh, God!" Seifer cried out, sitting up sharply. He turned to Quistis who was sitting on the edge of the bed, and grabbed her shoulders roughly. "Tell me I didn't see what I thought I saw! Please tell me it wasn't......."
"Ashton....." Quistis finished, somewhat stricken. "I'm sorry, Seifer, but it was. He's dead,"
Seifer shook his head, trembling, as his hands slid off her shoulders to rest limply on the bed.
Ashton Petious was dead, and the scene had been left exactly as it had been in Seifer's dream.
(....no.....it must be a coincidence....) Seifer thought desperately. (....please tell me it is.......*I* didn't......)
"Seifer...." Quistis called, shaking him from his thoughts. "....I know it was a horrible thing to see, but I never expected *you* to faint at a sight like that,"
Seifer didn't answer her, he just smiled weakly at her try for lightening the mood.
"Of course..." Quistis continued, her tone becoming much more solemn. "....you don't see things like *that* very often. At least we can imagine that he went quickly, considering his........head was no longer attached to his body....." she fumbled with her hands nervously, obviously disturbed by the image she'd brought back.
Seifer looked at her, a nauseating feeling churning in his stomach at seeing her in pain over this. He lifted an arm to place it on her shoulder.
"Then.......you saw him....?" he asked, praying that she hadn't. To his disappointment, she nodded.
"Who would do something like that, Seifer...?" she asked, tears forming in her eyes at the very thought. "Ashton's been a student of mine ever since I first got my license. He's the one who started the Trepies." she laughed a little then. "He was always trying to flirt with me, and I knew he was working up the nerve to ask me out every time. But, he never did, never could I guess.........and now he'll never even get the chance to be a SeeD....."
She clung to Seifer's hand on her shoulder, holding it tight as she looked up into his eyes. Something dawned on her as she saw him then, looking as pained as she did.
"Oh, Seifer, I'm so sorry," she began. "You're not taking this well either, and I'm not exactly helping the matter, am I?"
"Don't worry. Don't worry about me," Seifer dismissed. "It was just a fluke, fainting like that. I'll be ok,"
Quistis didn't seem so sure, especially considering how jumpy and agitated Seifer had been lately. She knew his dreams were plaguing him, she just didn't know how much.
"Maybe you should go to your room and get some sleep. It might...."
"No!" Seifer interrupted. "I mean.......I'm fine, I don't need any more sleep. I'll just go to the cafeteria and have a bite to eat. I never made it to breakfast, after all," His anxiety was more than clear, but Quistis nodded.
"I never made it either," she smiled. "Might as well go together. I'm sure Dr. Kadowaki will let you go. Come on," She stood up from the bed, pulling Seifer along with her. He was very glad to be getting out of there, and even more glad that he wouldn't be going back to his room to sleep any time soon.
(I just gotta....keep telling myself......that I had nothing to do with what happened) Seifer thought as they left the Infirmary. (I was in my room all night........I was asleep when it happened..........it's just a coincidence.....just......a coincidence.......)
If only he could be sure.....
----------
The day slid by much faster than Seifer would've liked. Sure, he kept himself as busy as possible, avoiding his room......his bed.....at any cost, but he still would eventually have to face what he was so deathly frightened of. He would have to face his dreams, going on faith and a deep sense of denial that Ashton Petious' death was in no way related to him.
The murder, as everyone knew it must have been, was far from solved, however. No one had witnessed the act, and there were no real clues to go on towards catching whoever had committed it. Seifer was deeply disturbed by that. No murderer caught meant there was still a murderer loose, and he couldn't face the idea of it somehow being him.
It was nearly midnight when Seifer finally retired to his dorm. Each step to the door, each step closer to the act of closing his eyes and surrendering to slumber, horrified him. He'd been telling himself over and over in his head that there was no way *he* had killed Ashton. It wasn't possible. It wasn't..... it *couldn't* be possible.
Seifer stood staring at his bed, gathering courage. He felt so stupid really, being afraid to fall asleep. That's as bad as being afraid of the dark. Silly and childish, and certainly not *him*. So, he took a breath, shook his head in repulsion for being so foolish, and climbed into bed.
(It was horrible what happened........but I had nothing to do with it!) Seifer thought assuredly. (I doubt the real killer's even from Garden. They'll catch whoever it is in no time.......of course they will.) he turned anxiously on his side, allowing his eyes to close. (I'm gonna beat these dreams once and for all tonight! I'm a different person than I was a year ago. Quistis is right; I'm not a killer.........I'm not........oh please, God, tell me I'm not......)
----------
/Seifer's eyes were slightly clouded as he walked along the walkway of Balamb Garden. It was late, but he could still tell that his vision was more misted than it should be, as if he was walking through a light fog./
/His mind seemed almost as hazy as his surroundings. He couldn't quite remember why he had decided to go out, why he stalked the hallways of Garden with his Hyperion in his hand......./
/ "Jei, wait up you dork! I can't run that fast!" Seifer heard a young voice call./
/ "It's not my fault you like the Garden hotdogs so much, Porky!" another young voice answered her./
/Seifer turned to look behind him, something gleaming in his eyes as his purpose became clear to him with what he saw. There were two younger classmen headed his way. One was that little boy who was always running around the walkway, to everyone's annoyance. The other was his little friend, a girl barely an inch taller than him who always seemed to be in his shadow. Both were only about 10 years old, and Seifer grinned wickedly as they came closer./
/ "I'll teach you to call me Porky!" the girl called, catching up to her companion as she yanked on the back of his shirt. "Why do you always have to be so...........uh oh......" The girl had caught sight of Seifer, who was now stopped in the walkway, and she looked as though she'd just gotten her hand caught in the cookie jar./
/ "Oh, look, *Jei*, it's Mr. *Almasy*......." the girl said sweetly, pouring on the innocent act as she nudged the boy next to her in the ribs./
/Jei looked up at Seifer fearfully at first, until realizing his friend's plan. "Gee, Maren, you're right. You know, *Sir*, we know we should be in our rooms right now.....we just......ummm......."/
/ "Lost track of time!" Maren finished nervously, grinning a very guilty looking grin./
/Seifer smirked back at them. He knew the rules. It was one thing for an upper classmen to go out after curfew, especially if they were going to the Training Center, but it was a *big* no-no for the younger kids to go out. Of course, Garden conduct wasn't exactly what was preoccupying Seifer's mind right now./
/ "Don't worry, kids, I won't turn ya in," Seifer stated, getting a very relieved reaction from the two in front of him. He then lifted his gunblade from his side a bit, staring at it, and then at them, with a fearfully deranged glare. "But.......I will have to punish you,"/
/The kids merely laughed apprehensively at first, sure that Seifer must be joking around with them. But, as he drew closer, raising his gunblade all the more, they knew to be afraid./
/ "S...Sir?" Jei stuttered. "Mr......Almasy....? What...why....?" He couldn't quite get it out, especially since he was dodging the blow of a very powerful gunblade at the time./
/ "Jei!" Maren screamed, backing fearfully away. Unbelievably, the boy had escaped unharmed, and Seifer stumbled forward from the force of his strike not meeting it's intended target./
/Jei scrambled over to Maren, both too afraid to run away as Seifer recovered himself and turned back towards them./
/ "Xu told us too watch out for you!" Maren yelled. "Instructor Trepe is always telling us how you're a different person now than the one who attacked Garden, but Xu's always told us you were dangerous!"/
/ "Good for her...." Seifer sneered, slamming his gunblade down. But, it clanged against the side railing of the walkway as both kids dashed away. The one thing Seifer hadn't counted on was how fast little children could be. "Hold still, you little brats!"/
/The two had found their legs by this time and were running full pelt to get away from that deadly gunblade. Seifer's long strides caught up to them quickly, however, and he caught Jei by the arm, who surprisingly had fallen a step a behind Maren, within seconds./
/ "Let me go! Let me go!" Jei cried, tears falling down his face in sheer panic and fear./
/Seifer simply grinned murderously. "You really shouldn't go out after dark, you know...." he whispered into the boys ear, plunging his gunblade through the child's chest at the same time. The gasped cry which escaped the boys throat as Seifer let him fall from his gunblade to the floor only gave Seifer more satisfaction./
/Seifer didn't get much time to reflect on a job well done though, for before he could even lift his head up, he was plowed over onto the ground. Maren had charged him, acting on adrenaline and enraged grief that blinded her better judgment./
/ "You monster!" she cried furiously, tears streaming down her face. "It was you, I know it was you! You killed Ashton, you killed......Jei......you......you murderer!" She was pounding on him with her little fists madly./
/Seifer, in shock of the situation, had dropped his gunblade, and was frantically trying to grab at the girl's rapidly moving arms. He caught one in mid-strike finally, but just as he did, she took her other hand and gashed her nails across his left cheek, drawing blood./
/In a horrifying fury, Seifer grasped her other arm, gripping both tightly as he collected himself and got to his feet. Maren was whimpering pitifully under his painful grasp, and Seifer's glare was terrifyingly piercing as he loomed over her. He released her arms and grabbed her by the throat all in one fluid movement. She struggled for breath as he stared back heartlessly, more terror than any child should have to endure screaming out through her red-rimmed eyes./
/ "Are you afraid, little girl? Huh? Do you wish I'd let you go? Do you want to live?" Seifer taunted, despite how Maren obviously couldn't answer him. She was already turning blue. "Nothing to say?" he asked cruelly. "Too bad........" Seifer pulled her closer to him, holding her by the neck with both hands. Then, with one inhuman movement....... "I almost had a change of heart....."........Seifer snapped the girl's neck brutally, and she fell with a sickening thud to the floor............/
Seifer's eyes sprung open as he woke from the dream, but this time he didn't shoot up in bed. He couldn't. He was paralyzed with fear, with grief, with a complete disgust for himself. His breathing just became more and more ragged as he sobbed painfully into his hands.
Seifer couldn't think, he couldn't get those awful images out of his mind. He couldn't get the feel of that delicate, little neck in his murderous hands out of his mind.
Pulling the covers aside, Seifer fled from his bed, escaping into his tiny bathroom to splash water on his face. He had to think calmly, think of some explanation for the dream. He had to keep reminding himself that it wasn't real.
Remember, don't fear the dream, fear the reality........
As Seifer turned on his bathroom light and looked up into the mirror at his reflection, he noticed something that broke down all sense of his reality. There was a deep scratch, clearly new, running along his left cheek.
Shards of glass shattered onto the sink and tiled floor as Seifer slammed his fist into the mirror, into a reflection of something......someone......he couldn't face.
**********
Me, being the idiot that I am, tried moving chapters around on the ff.net site with this story first. Which, of course, ended with me loosing all previous reviews and hit counts. I'm so stupid. Anyways, I hope you like this next chapter, and they'll only be getting better as the story reaches it's climax soon. Please feel free to re-review, since some of you gave such wonderful ones that I now no longer have. :-( And of course, PLEASE REVIEW for this chapter. Love you all! ;-p