Part 4 Kursai's
POV
After I left the cafeteria I dashed down the
hall in search of a good hiding spot. A
while back I had vowed to myself that noone
would see me cry but myself ever again. I hated the sight of myself crying. I ran into the girls rest room and into a stall before anyone could see
me. I started to cry. Crying made me feel so weak and inferior to
the others which made me want to cry even more. *I feel just like Wufei refers to all of us as a 'weak
onna'. I haven't cried this much for
years*
I heard someone walking by so I tried to cease
my sobbing but I couldn't. *I guess what they say is true, if you suppress your
emotions for to long one day they will all come back to hit you smack dab in
the face. That proves it Heero ain't
human*
I was trying to keep the sobbing at least at a
minimum but whoever
was walking by must have just shrugged me off
*Thank Gods*
As I sat there in the rest room stall I just
kept thinking about the questions asked earlier.
*"Why are you doing this to yourself?"
"Why won't you tell us?"
"We're you friends right?"
"Tyhen tell us why you stopped
eating"*
*They knew I was keeping it all bottled up, but
it took them forever to notice something was wrong with me*
I was acting "weird" as they liked to
term it, for about a little over 6 months. The only thing that gave me away was I started to loose weight rapidly
because I didn't eat enough andb I became gradually paler but I had my reasons
for all of this.
*Maybe it would be easier to just tell
someone. Maybe one of the guys is in
their room*
Trowa and Wufei shared a dorm and one of them
was most likely to be there. Quatre,
Duo, and Heero all shared a dorm but they were probably still at lunch. I
got out of the rest room stall,and walked out of the rest room slowly on wobbly legs making sure there wasn't a single
tear on my face; no emotions to betray me. I walked all the way to Trowa and Wufei's dorm and stood there on shaking knees a second just thinking
*Come on Kursai all you need to do is knock on
the door, one of 'em will answer and you can just spill everything, and see
what they say.*
But knowing me I just stood there pretending
that maybe if I just stand here, Wufei or Trowa will come walking out of their
dorm. But I knew that wasn't goiong to
work.
Knock Knock Knock
I faintly tapped on the door.
*Oh my Gods what was I thinking? Why am I here?* I ran back to my rest room stall and sobbed.
End Part 4