You Never Thought He Knew
She sang her long song (?) for anyone who would listen; to anyone who would care to hear her plea mixed in with the words of the song. To anyone who would have time to just stop and lend an ear to the sad melody that was issued forth from her lips that were tinted pink and curved downwards in a sad frown. But she was alone. No one was near to hear her sing the gloomy hymn. She was alone on a rocky precipice that over looked the ancient lands of the dragon, the layline. Nothing was here. Nothing grew here. The land was barren. Yet her sad aria filled the warm air sweeter than any fragrance the world as ever known. Her voice was pure and her message true. She wanted to learn the truth about her existence that only the spirit of the past knew.
Was she asking too much to learn why she was created? Melfina didn't know. Would the spirit of the dragon still refuse her? There was nothing that this empty land could offer her. Nothing in the age-old temple could offer any reason why she was brought into this world of pirates and swift ships. And she had been so hopeful-hopeful that they would discover her past and her destiny. But they found nothing and she couldn't help but feel a little disheartened.
Melfina paused in her song. The tears she had been trying to avoid were coming again and this time she allowed them to fall from her black lashes. There was no around to hide them from. It hurt so much to be disappointed in this land. Had she wished for too much? Maybe this was her punishment in trying to figure out the layline, the spot already protected by the ancient dragon. Melfina stood numbly on the edge of the cliff, her watery eyes wondering over the ugly brown land that stretched on for miles before her. She had no idea how long it had been since she first stood there.
Would the others worry? Would he worry? She doubted that. Gene didn't care for her. But still her heart leaped into her throat every time she thought of him. Did she love him? She felt the miserable pain of sorrow and loneliness but could she love? No. Constructs can't love. But that was a lie-a nasty lie that would protect her heart from further abuse. Gene had been so cold to her recently. Had she done something wrong? Melfina didn't have the courage to ask him directly so she wallowed in her desolation while Gene had no idea how his nonchalant manner hurt her. Would he ever know? She did even know herself.
As the moments dragged by, Melfina still stood while the tears continued to fall. The tears of sleepless night. The tears of silent pain and tribulation. The tears of a delicate soul caught in the barbwire of love, life, and duty. Did she have love? Many might think so with so many friends surrounding her-Gilliam, Aisha, Sazuka, Jim, Gene. Did she have a life? Maybe. Could constructs live a life like a normal human? Did she have a duty? Yes. To fly the Outlaw Star. Was that all she was good for? She could cook a little but she wasn't that great and no one thanked her after they had eaten their meals. But she was use to that.
Finally Melfina wiped away her tears. She took a deep breath that was meant to calm her, to allay her high-strung emotions. She thought that she ought to go back to the group even though they would not have been worried about her disappearance. It was safe her. Nothing could hurt her. Still it would be a little uplifting if someone did worry about her. It would be real nice to have Gene be concerned about her. But that was asking for too much, wasn't it. Immediately Melfina put that thought away. There was no use in making a fairytale of her relationship with Gene. There was no love, only a sense that he had to protect her because if he didn't she would fall into the hands of the hateful McDougal Brothers.
Harry...
He had promised to make her happy.
To cherish her, to look after her.
Melfina shivered a little and crossed her arms over her chest. She found it odd to think about Harry McDouglle, like she shouldn't even be doing it. Gene had said that it was good to hate the two brothers but she didn't hate him though, even after he had attacked her. But she did pity him unlike Gene. Some times she never wanted to see the brothers but it was so hard to think about that, knowing that Harry could possibly be connected to her. He was a construct after all.
Did he love her? No because he hit her. Yes, because he reached into her soul and told her the truth about their existence. Melfina didn't know which answer to pick. If she picked no her soft heart would cry for pity, not hate. If she picked yes, she would feel like she had betrayed Gene.
Did he understand her in a way that Gene didn't? Yes because he knew what it was like to live as a construct. No, because he didn't know her personality. Did he know her favorite color? Her favorite flower? The color of her eyes when she was sad, or when she was angry? The candy she liked to most? Did he know that she wanted a dress? That she wanted to be as carefree as Aisha or as beautiful as Sazuka? Did anyone know this? No because they did not listen to her.
Gene stared down in disbelief at Melfina's cold body lying like a piece of marble on the bed. She was so white. She didn't breath at all. As a construct she had been turned off temporally. He cold have killed that man that did this to her. The man who had shut down her entire system and forced her mind into a deep coma that was utterly unreachable. He was still in shock. Who could he have done that to Melfina?
"Melfina..."Gene pleaded. There were tears in his eyes. He moved closer to her cold body and reached out for her icy hand. There was no one in the room so he could talk to her like he had always wanted to. Alone and heartfelt, just the two of them with no one to disturb them. "Melfina..." he murmured again, a solitary tear falling from his eyes. He didn't care if she didn't hear him now. He had to tell her no matter what. It had been so long since the last time he had actually spoke to her. He couldn't continue on like this.
A He (?) pulled a stool close to the bed and sat down, slowly caressing her hand, wishing to give his life to her that very moment so that she could wake up. Will she ever wake up? That thought chilled him to the bone. She had to wake up. If she didn't Gene didn't know what else to do. He cared for Melfina so much.
"Melfina, I know that I have been at a distance for a while," he began, his voice soft. "I'm sorry for that. I just couldn't face you and tell you the truth. I know it is something you want to hear but regret having heard if when you have heard it. So I avoided you, trying not to let you get to me. I couldn't lie to you either. But... You are a construct-build for one purpose. See? Something I don't wish to tell you. That is why I kept my distance. I didn't want to hurt you."
A moment of silence. Gene stared down at her pale face. He smiled a little, a brief smile brought on by amusement. "It's funny, Melfina," he said, "Even when I close my eyes I know your entire face, every detail is burnt into my skull. I know your eye color-brown, but a dark hazel when you are sad then a rich crimson when you are angry. I know you tend to look down when you are shy. She You (?) smile and laugh when he your you're (?) nervous. You never frown. You have a gentle air about you like a mother when you see something that is precious in your eyes..."
Another smile. "Your favorite color is blue. And you want a blue dress. You always look in the windows of the dress shops she I bet you can gaze at those gowns for hours. Melfina, when you wake up I promise to buy you a dress. You have wanted one for so long. I think you deserve it. Also remind me to get you some of those sugar drops. I know how much you like but you rarely get one. So I'll get you some of those too plus a bunch of lavender. You like lavender, don't you. Remember that day you stayed in the city garden just looking at those purple blossoms. When you came home that evening you filled the flat with the fragrance..."
"Melfina, you are the most loving and beautiful woman I have ever met. You are caring and sweet and I don't know what we would do without you. What I would I do (?) if I lost you. Please, Melfina, wake up, come back to us, so that I can tell you I love you."
